Thursday Night Aceldama
October 15th, 2009 – #HOW85
The Best Arena, Chicago IL
The HOTv logo gives way to the brand new Thursday Night Aceldama banner and the World Champions music begins to play as the road to ICONIC is officially under way.
But instead of going live inside The Best Arena a video instead begins to play and the setting is obvious as it starts up…
The parking lot of The Best Arena.
Political Championship Wrestling’s Dr. Bill, Baron Von Munchke, Bobby Ricky Michaels and Marty Gibson-Lane aka The Midnite Rockin’ Xpress, plus The Green World Order’s GreenPete, Extreme Vegan Brock Cole Lee, PeaceNick, and Peta from PETA swarm all over a car in the parking lot. Von Munchke and Michaels work on loosening up the lug nuts. The GWO take turns spray painting graffiti all over the car. Dr. Bill and Gibson-Lane take turn busting out windows and lights with tire irons.
Upset over not being signed by HOW, Dr. Bill takes extreme pleasure in every swing of the tire iron that connects with the car. He is so focused on destroying the vehicle one swing at a time; he does not see FBI Special Agent Charlize Starling, Dawn McGill, and two uniformed officers wheeling Dr. Annabel Lecktor, strapped to a gurney, straitjacketed, and wearing a mask.
Starling: “WHAT…are you guys doing?”
Dr. Bill whips around.
Dr. Bill: “Starling! McGill? What are you doing here?”
McGill: “I’m meeting the Egg Bandits and signing a HOW managerial contract.”
Dr. Bill: “You too?”
Starling: “What are you guys doing?”
Dr. Bill: “What does it look like I’m doing. I’m enacting a pound of flesh from Lee Best for not signing us. Anger is nothing more than an outward expression of hurt, fear and frustration. We are merely reacting to the news that HOW, in its infinite wisdom, signed you and not us.”
Starling: “I hate to tell you, but that’s not Lee Best’s car.”
Dr. Bill: “What do you mean, that’s not Lee Best’s car.”
Starling: “That’s not Lee’s car.”
Dr. Bill: “Oh yeah? That license plate says otherwise.”
Close up on the license plate. ‘B-E’ is visible. The rest of the license plate is dirty and unreadable.
Starling: “That’s not his car.”
Starling reaches into her purse and pulls out a handkerchief. She wipes down the license plate that cleans up very nicely. The license plate reads ‘BENNY.’
Starling: “You guys vandalized Benny Newell’s car!”
Dr. Bill’s eyes widen. The license plate clearly reads ‘BENNY.’
Starling walks to the car and peeks in the back window.
Starling: “Besides, the empty bottles of Jack Daniels in the back seat should have been a dead giveaway.”
Dr. Bill: “Oh.”
Starling: “Well? Have a good night. Oh…and I wouldn’t want to be here when Benny finds out you’ve trashed his car.”
The video fades out and we go LIVE inside The Best Arena and we are greeted by none other than Joe Hoffman and one pissed off Big Buff Benny Newell!!
Welcome to TNA!!
The crowd is in a frenzy as we cut to a live shot of Joe and Benny and the announcers literally have to yell as they welcome in the viewing audience on HOTv.
Joe Hoffman: Hello everyone and welcome to Thursday Night ACELDAMA!!!
The crowd pops huge for the mention of the World Champion…
Joe Hoffman: That is right folks do not touch that remote. Due to a deal between Lee Best and an unnamed person the show has been renamed for one month. Of course that person was revealed to be the World Champion Aceldama and Benny you just know that it is eating Lee alive knowing that his show is called Aceldama now..
Benny Newell: WHO GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THAT JOE….MY CAR…MY FUCKING CAR!!
On cue the HOV comes to life and we once again see the footage of the PCW stars destroying Benny’s car after mistaking it for Lee Best’s who refused to sign the PCW stars.
As the replay ends we return to Joe and Benny at ringside. Benny has his official HOW flask in full tilt mode as Joe focuses in on welcoming everyone to the show.
Joe Hoffman: As Benny copes with his loss let me officially welcome everyone back here to Thursday Night Aceldama where we as a company have just come off one of the greatest HOW Pay Per View events of all time..Rumble at the Rock 2.
The HOV comes to life again and as Joe gives quick recaps of the results from Rumble at the Rock 2 we see video of each of the title matches..
“The Maurako’s retaining the Tag Team Titles in a wild match…
Michael DeNucci defeating Chris Kostoff by decision to win the HOFC Title…
David Black retaining the LSD Championship against Joseph Gregory…
Graystone defeating Maximillian Kael in one the craziest ICON Matches in HOW History…
The return of HOW Hall of Famer Jatt Starr has he helped Aceldama retain the World Title against Best Alliance member Trent”
The crowd is a cheering madly as the footage of Jatt Starr is shown…
Joe Hoffman: Folks what a PPV it was but now it is in the past and now it is time to move forward and towards our December 14th pay per view…ICONIC!!
Benny Newell: You know normally I would get an insta-boner for Jatt Starr but not after seeing him shake hands with Mike Best and screwing over Best Alliance member Trent…I mean JATT IS AS MUCH OF THE BEST ALLIANCE AS LEE FUCKING BEST….WHAT THE FUCK??!!!
Again Benny just turns his official HOW Flask up towards the sky as Joe can only shake his head at his partner.
Joe Hoffman: Folks it appears that Benny is in for a long night. Speaking of a long night the minutes have to be going by like hours for the LSD Champion David Black who will take on ICON Champion and HOW Hall of Famer, Graystone in tonight’s main event for the ICON Championship. Many people have clamored for Black to be given a shot to move up the title ranks and tonight is his opportunity to prove that and you just know he is nervous….right Benny?
Benny Newell: Dude I get nervous just being in the same BUILDING as Graystone..let alone in the ring with the future of my career in HOW on the line….ya Black is bound to have some butterflies but that is to be expected and trust me….I am a world class athlete and I STILL get butterflies.
Joe Hoffman: Before what?
Benny Newell: Huh?
Joe Hoffman: Before what do you get butterflies?
Benny Newell: Was I supposed to say knock knock?
Joe just lets out a long sigh and shakes his head as Benny holds his hands up as if to say “what”?
Joe Hoffman: Folks although RATR 2 answered a lot of questions it ended with everyone NEEDING some answers to questions such as…Why did Jatt Starr align himself with Mike Best? What is the health status of Maximillian Kael? Why is exactly Mike Best here in HOW? How will Lee respond to everything that happened at the last show? And finally….is Aceldama’s World Title run going to end at the hands of Perfect Paul Paras?
Benny Newell: He is a fucking idiot, Dead, who fucking cares, people will get fired, fucking hell fucking NO!!
Joe now looks at Benny and gives him a look of bewilderment.
Benny Newell: Those were your answers to your dramatic questions…..can we just start the fucking show already?
Joe Hoffman: Well thanks for the insight there Mr. Newell and yes..right after this first commercial break we will return with Twisted Reality taking on the Brothers of the Beast in tag team action…we will be right back folks!!
Brothers of the Beast vs. Twisted Reality
Tag Team Match
Back live and Joe and Benny welcome the viewing audience back to the show as Stricken by Disturbed hits and Scottywood and Johnny Stevens make their way out onto the Best Arena stage accompanied by Frankie the Cameraman and Kelly Fisher for the first match of the evening.
Bryan McVay: Coming down the aisle weighting in at a combined weight of 508lbs… the team of Scottywood and Johnny Stevens…. TWISTED REALITY!
The group makes their way to the ring amongst boos from the crowd.
Joe Hoffman: Well it would seem that Twisted Reality isn’t being well received here by the Turmoil fans.
Benny Newell: Who cares about any of that!? Did you not see what just happened to my car!? I need a fuckin’ drink.
Benny takes out his flask as Twisted Reality steps into the ring and their music is soon replaced by “Pain” by Three Days Grace.
Bryan McVay: And their opponents, from Reno Nevada. Weighting in at a combined weight of 606lbs, the team of Jason Midnight and Tyson Ross… THE BROTHERS OF THE BEAST!
Jason Midnight and Tyson Ross make their way to the ring without their other member Jacob Morgan, and we cut away from the ring and focus on Hoffman and Newell and Benny appears to be holding his phone in one hand and his flask in the other.
Joe Hoffman: I don’t know if I will ever be able to get over the size of Jason Midnight…. the guy is huge!
Benny Newell: …..
Joe Hoffman: Benny, don’t you have anything to say about The Brothers of the Beast?
Benny Newell: Shut up, I’m trying to call my insurance company.
Joe Hoffman: Benny we have a match to call.
Benny Newell: …..
Joe Hoffman: Well it looks like I might be on my own for this one, and it looks like we’re ready for action in the ring.
We cut back to the ring to see all four wrestlers standing in the middle of the ring face to face. Well except for when it comes to Midnight and Johnny Stevens as Jason Midnight towers over him, so it’s more like face to chin. Joel Hortega is able to separate the two teams and Scottywood and Jason Midnight exit the ring as Hortega calls for the bell.
Stevens and Ross circle each other and hook up in a collar and elbow tie up and Stevens backs Ross up into a neutral corner and Hortega moves in between the stars to separate them. Ross raises his arms straight up in the air and as Stevens backs away Johnny decks Tyson right in the face but behind the back of Joel Hortega.
Joe Hoffman: Well it certainly didn’t take long for Twisted Reality to cheat.
Benny Newell: Benny Newell.
Joe Hoffman: Is there actually someone in the office at this hour?
Benny Newell: Do you mind? Can’t you see I’m on the fucking telephone?
Johnny Stevens pulls Tyson Ross out of the corner and to the middle of the ropes and whips him across the ring. Ross bounces off the ropes and Stevens drops his head for a back body drop but Tyson Ross runs up and punts Johnny Stevens in the face. Stevens falls down and Ross begins to work him over on the canvas with a series of stomps to the sternum. Tyson Ross then tags in Jason Midnight and exits the ring. Midnight stands over the downed Stevens and bends down and grabs him by the head with both hands and then pulls him up off the canvas and backs him into the corner by Tyson Ross. Midnight puts Johnny’s arms over the top rope and holds a finger up to his mouth telling the crowd to shh. Midnight then raises his arm high into the air and brings a hard chop down across Johnny Stevens chest.
Joe Hoffman: What an incredible chop there by Jason Midnight.
Benny Newell: I think that chop was so hard it’s going to cause a Tsunami in Cleveland.
Joe Hoffman: Oh are you joining us now Benny?
Benny Newell: Ok I’ve got to press five…. no I’m busy!
Johnny Stevens stumbles out of the corner and right into a Bear Hug by Jason Midnight. Midnight holds Stevens in the bear hug position and he drops down onto the canvas on top of Johnny Stevens. Midnight gets up with Stevens while still holding onto the bear hug and again slams him down to the canvas. Midnight repeats this for a third time just for good measure.
Joe Hoffman: What a series of Bear hug bombs!
Benny Newell: Press four…
Jason Midnight once again picks Stevens up from the canvas while holding onto the bear hug but finally places Stevens feet on the canvas, but only so he can belly to belly suplex Johnny Stevens who luckily tags in Scottywood unbeknownst to Midnight. Scottywood runs to the neutral corner and climbs the turnbuckle as Midnight was towards the downed Johnny Stevens who just rolled out of the ring. Midnight notices Scotty is no longer in the corner and turns around just in time to be caught with a missile dropkick which sends the big man off of his feet.
Joe Hoffman: Scotty needs to take advantage of Midnight being off of his feet right here.
Benny Newell: Dammit, I just want to talk to a person!
Scotty quickly attempts to put Midnight in a Texas Cloverleaf but Midnight powers out by kicking Scottywood halfway across the ring. Both competitors get to their feet and Scotty charges at Midnight with a should block which does absolutely nothing. Midnight looks at Scotty and then choke slams him down to the mat and then Midnight tags back out to Tyson Moss.
Joe Hoffman: I’m not sure why Midnight just tagged out there. He was pretty much having his way with Twisted Reality.
Benny Newell: If you press zero enough don’t you normally get a customer service representative?
Joe Hoffman: Not always.
Benny Newell: What do you know anyhow?
Tyson Ross bends down to grab Scottywood but Scotty was playing possum and quickly hooks Ross in a small package and Joel Hortega drops down to count the pin.
Kick out by Ross.
Joe Hoffman: That was a close call there for the Brothers of the Beast. Scotty was playing possum and almost snuck out a win for his team.
Benny Newell: Ah shit… you mean I’m missing Scottywood?
Joe Hoffman: Well you wouldn’t be missing him if you were doing your job.
Benny Newell: You know what? When someone destroys your car I will let you take care of it while I carry the load ok?
Joe Hoffman: Really?
Benny Newell: No you gullible fuck.
After the kick out both competitors quickly return to their feet and Ross runs toward Scottywood who nails a spine-buster on Ross sending him back down to the mat. The effects of the spine-buster quickly wear off as Ross is right back up to his feet only to get a kick to the gut and a double arm DDT from Scottywood for his efforts. Scotty covers Ross again.
Midnight begins to step over the top rope.
Midnight enters the ring.
Kick out by Tyler Ross.
Joe Hoffman: It looks like Midnights height might be a huge disadvantage in this match when it comes to him getting into the ring quickly to break up pin falls.
Midnight doesn’t leave the ring as he grabs Scottywood and lifts him into the air with a double handed choke slam but is quickly clipped from behind by Johnny Stevens sending Midnight and Scotty toppling to the ground. Stevens grabs Midnight by the leg and drags him to the edge of the ring leaving Midnight in the ring but his legs hanging out under the bottom rope. Stevens then proceeds to slam the leg of Midnight into the ring apron repeatedly.
Joe Hoffman: The referee is losing all control of this matchup.
Benny Newell: Yes Hello? I finally got someone!
Joe Hoffman: Congratulations Benny.
Benny Newell: Hello? Hello? What the fuck!? I just dropped the call!
Ross gets to his feet and runs over and kicks Stevens in the head freeing Midnight who rolls out under the bottom rope. Ross turns around and Scottywood nails a clothesline sending Tyler Ross over the top rope and to the ground. Kelly Fisher moves away from the action as she surely doesn’t want to see a repeat from Rumble at the Rock.
Joe Hoffman: Yeah you better get out of there Kelly.
Benny Newell: She can come over here. I could use a drinking partner.
Scotty vaults himself over the top rope and out onto Jason Midnight who catches him and then rams him back first into the ring post. Tyler Ross gets to his feet and rolls back into the ring as Midnight tosses Scotty back in as well and Ross quickly covers Scotty.
Stevens appears from nowhere and breaks up the pin attempt.
Joe Hoffman: A close call there for Twisted Reality.
Benny Newell: Don’t get your panties in a wad Hoffman. Twisted Reality has this one in the bag.
Ross gets up to tag in Midnight and when he does Scotty rolls across the ring and tags in Johnny Stevens. Midnight instantly picks Stevens up for a choke slam but Stevens pokes Midnight in the eye with his thumb and Midnight drops Stevens. Johnny Stevens takes the opportunity to bounce off the ropes but as he comes back the temporarily blinded Midnight still is able to land a big boot to the face. Midnight is extremely annoyed by the cheap shot taken by Stevens and Midnight hoists Stevens onto his shoulders. Not liking what he is watching Scottywood readies himself to enter the ring. Midnight in the meantime drives Johnny Stevens to the mat with The Final Toll. Scotty enters the ring as Hortega drops to register the pin.
Scotty is speared by Tyler Ross as he went to break up the pin.
Bryan McVay: Here are your winners, Jason Midnight & Tyler Ross… THE BROTHERS OF THE BEAST!!!!
‘Hunt You Down’ by Saliva starts and Mario & Mosé Maurako walk down toward the ring carrying a couple of microphones and two pillows that are covered with a red cloth. Brothers of the Beast exit the other side of the ring and make their way up the ramp as the two Maurako’s enter the ring where Scottywood and Johnny Stevens are located.
Mario: Tough break eh guys?
Mosé: I thought these guys were supposed to be the #1 Contenders?
Mario: Yeah but like I’ve said all along Mosé, we just beat these two and they aren’t worthy of another title shot. So why don’t you two punks just get on out of here and let the champs have their time now.
Joe Hoffman: It must be easy for Mario to come out here and throw his weight around when Twisted Reality just fought in a match.
Benny Newell: But he has all the gold so he gets to make the rules.
Joe Hoffman: I guess it pays to be a Maurako right now.
Scottywood and Johnny Stevens exit the ring and begin to leave with Frankie and Kelly choosing to fight this battle another day. As they leave Mario blows a kiss to Kelly who doesn’t receive it well.
Mario: Now for all of you poor Chicago Trash who couldn’t afford to buy Rumble at the Rock let me show you a little clip. I think I’ll write it off on my taxes as a charitable donation.
Mario points to the HOV and it lights up showing a few clips from the Tag Title Match at Rumble at the Rock 2. Soon we see Matteo grabbing Kelly and Kelly eventually frees herself by kicking Matteo in the groin followed with Mario hitting The Red Scare on Scottywood for the win.
Mosé: It was a great win for The Family and it made sure that the HOW Tag Team Titles stayed right where they belonged… with The Maurako’s.
Mario: Then later that night we tossed the Stable Titles into the Ocean. Which brings us to today. Today we stand before you ignorant Chicagoans your uncrowned HOW Tag Team Champions. But as of right now we will again be crowned.
Mario and Mosé remove the covers from the pillows revealing two brand new HOW Tag Team Title belts. The father and son duo take a moment to strap the Tag Straps on one another.
Mario: But that’s not the only crowning we have for you here tonight. Mosé why don’t you do the honors?
Mosé: It would be my pleasure. Ladies and Gentlemen please join us in giving a warm welcome to my Grandfather and my Uncle… Matteo & Martino Maurako!
Mario and Mosé applaud in the ring as the rest of the arena boos. Matteo and Martino come out onto stage but they are not alone…. they are dragging a female with them.
Joe Hoffman: Who is that? Oh my god! Not again!?
Benny Newell: It’s Kelly!
Matteo and Martino drag Kelly toward the ring each holding one of her arms.
Joe Hoffman: Where is Scottywood, Johnny Stevens, or even Frankie?
The camera quickly cuts backstage to see all three of them face down on the ground.
Joe Hoffman: Oh great, it looks as if Martino and Matteo took out Twisted Reality and have abducted Kelly.
Matteo and Martino push Kelly into the ring where she is grabbed and held by Mosé until Matteo and Martino get into the ring.
Mario: You see Kelly at Rumble at the Rock you did something that nobody should do here in HOW…. you messed with a Maurako. Now you have to pay for your actions. You see Kelly over the last year or so I have developed quite the reputation with females like yourself. I’m sure you’ve probably heard about it… but just in case you haven’t… let’s roll the video package.
The HOV again lights up and Mario is shown standing in the ring with his Wife Amanda who had just given him divorce papers and then Mario pulls back and punches her in the face. Rapid shots soon flood the screen of Mario hitting Bobbinette Carey, Rihanna, a female LAPD Chief of Police, Summer Passions who was a stripper in Minnesota, Rihanna’s maid, Rihanna’s mom, Kate Ledger, a series of women from a Ne-Yo Concert, even more women at a Sara Bareilles concert, Judge Joy Montgomery, Aceldama, and finally five random women who were sitting ringside on an episode of Turmoil. The Whack-o-Meter finally appears on the HOV and begins rapidly scrolling from 1 up to 1,029 where it comes to a stop.
Mosé: Kelly, I’d like to introduce you to the Whack-o-Meter.
As Mosé finishes his sentence Mario smashes Kelly Fisher upside the head with his HOW Tag Team Title belt and she crumbles to the mat. Mario and Mosé hold the HOW Tag Team Titles high in the air as they are embraced by Matteo and Martino. ‘Hunt You Down’ by Saliva hits as The Maurako’s make their way back up the ramp as a Red, White, and Green pyro display go off up on the stage.
Joe Hoffman: I can’t believe the audacity of The Maurako’s. Can we get a medic out here to help Kelly?
Benny Newell: I’ll go give her mouth to mouth.
Joe Hoffman: You just sit right here, you’ve already had most of the night off the way it is. Folks we will be right back!!
How long will the Family hold onto the new titles??
As we come back live from commercial the Best Alliance Hummer Limo rolls up to the arena. For once, there is not a swarm of EPU guards surrounding the limo upon its arrival. The driver gets out quickly and heads over to open the door, but before he can it gets shoved open and the large man that is Trent bursts out of the limo. He begins just pacing back and forth and it is hard to make out what he is saying, all you can hear is the muttering of a name….Jatt Starr.
Next to emerge is Lee Best who seems a little down, he has a very serious look on his face and seems none to happy. He awaits someone else to exit.
The next person to emerge from the limo is Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal. Mark appears to be his normal self, nothing like the other two. He has a big smile on his face and seems like he is loving life. Just as the driver shuts the door behind Mark the beautiful new HOW interviewer Missy Andrews runs up to the limo with camerman in tote.
Missy instantly looks to talk to Lee Best, who sees her and motions that he doesn’t want to speak. Skipping by Mark she turns towards Trent. Trent is still pacing back and forth and a HOW crewmember runs up to him to try and get him over towards Missy. The moment he utters a word Trent punches him in the jaw, then spears him to the ground and begins pounding on his face with hammer fists. After seeing this, Missy is forced to turn to Mark.
Missy Andrews – Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal, it appear that the Best Alliance is currently not in good spirits. It looks like Trent is having anger issues, Lee seems depressed, and Graystone is nowhere to be seen. What is going on right now inside of the Best Alliance?
Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal – Well hello beautiful what is your name?
Missy Andrews – I am Missy Andrews, the new interviewer.
Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal – Well it is a pleasure to meet you.
Mark grabs Missy’s hand and kisses it as Trent meanwhile has begun just throwing any objects he can find. He finds a trashcan and hurls it at a wall. He knocks over a vending machine. As he does so a couple fans are walking by in Jatt Starr t-shirts. Trent sees them and starts running after them.
Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal – Oh shit. Lee, look at Trent, he is running after the fans.
Missy Andrews – Mark, can we get back on topic here, what is going on with the Best Alliance?
Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal – Everything is fine. Sure Trent is upset. He got robbed out of the World Title by Jatt Starr. But tonight there will be retribution for that. When me and Trent team up with Mario and take down the team of Jatt Starr, Max Kael, and damn, I can’t remember who the third guy is. But anyways, you get the point. Jatt Starr will get beaten down tonight at the hands of the Best Alliance, I can guarantee you that as Trent will be releasing all of his anger on Jatt.
Missy Andrews – Lee, how do you feel about being turned on by Jatt Starr, a long time Best Alliance member?
Lee Best – How do you think it fucking feels?
Missy Andrews – What do you intend to do about it?
Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal – Missy, did you see what happened to Marcus Reinhardt at Rumble at the Rock? I destroyed him. That is going to be what happens to Jatt Starr tonight. And that will only be the beginning of the payback against Jatt Starr. Jatt is gone, Ace is gone, Shane is gone. But the fact is that it doesn’t matter. The Best Alliance is and will always be the best faction as long as I am in it. And we will prove that tonight. Now I need to go find Trent to make sure he isn’t killing those fans, and Missy if you want to head into Lee’s office, he can use a BJ since Kirsta isn’t around.
Missy backhand Mark accross his face as he just smiles and grabs Missy’s ass. Suddenly out of nowhere a charging Trent clotheslines the cameraman with a full head of steam. He then grabs the camera and launches it into the distance. Missy screams and runs away. All you can hear is Lee’s voice.
Lee Best – Let’s go strategize.
We can only wonder what Lee and the Best Alliance is up to tonight?
Trip Eisen vs. Johnny Otaku
Back at ringside, Referee Matt Boettcher is seen stepping through the ropes before everyone’s attention is turned towards the entrance ramp, where young HOW superstar Johnny Otaku appears from the back looking fresh and rejuvenated.
Bryan McVay: This next match up is scheduled for ONE FALL! Introducing first, from Cleveland, Ohio, weighing 237 pounds… JOHNNY OTAKU!!!
Joe Hoffman: A new face here on Thursday Night Turm- *ahem* – Thursday Night Aceldama… Whew, gonna have to get used to that. Anyways, since his match didn’t officially air at the pay-per-view, we should note that this young man, Johnny Otaku, is coming off of an impressive victory over his fellow Turmoil draftee, Black Mamba.
Benny Newell: Yes Joe, the Taco reigned supreme. Get it?
Joe Hoffman: ::shrugs::
Benny Newell: You know… Taco Supreme?
Joe Hoffman: And I often wonder why I wasn’t drafted to Mayhem…
Otaku plays off the fans and slaps some hands at ringside before sliding under the bottom rope and posing for the crowd, who offer him mild cheers. His music cuts out abruptly before the music of Trip Eisen hits the Best Arena speakers and the fans come to their feet with boos.
Bryan McVay: And his opponent, from Cardiff, Wales, weighing 258 pounds… TRIP EISEN!!!
Upon mention of his name, the crowd boos louder and even moreso when several moments pass with no Eisen.
Joe Hoffman: Folks, Trip Eisen has been a quiet man in recent weeks, even during the much-anticipated Rumble at the Rock 2 pay-per-view which proved that anything and everything can happen here in HOW.
Benny Newell: Uh, Trip? Joe, you think he even knows he’s got a match tonight?
Joe Hoffman: Wait just a darn minute! Hey!
From right behind the announcer’s table, Eisen hops the barrier from the crowd and charges the ring, right behind Johnny Otaku, who is leaning over the ropes toward the entrance ramp, wondering where Eisen is.
Benny Newell: Right behind you, you idiot!
Eisen smiles and taps Otaku on the shoulder, which spins him around right into an Overhead Release Belly-to-Belly suplex! Boettcher signals for the bell and this match is officially under way.
DING ~ DING ~ DING!
Johnny Otaku is pretty quick to his feet after the suplex, but as he turns around, he walks right into Eisen’s Rollup of Doom!
Joe Hoffman: OH! Eisen almost escaped with a quick victory there!
Boettcher holds up 2 fingers as Eisen’s ruthlessness begins to show, slapping Otaku with several ferocious Knifedge Chops. Otaku returns the favor with several chops of his own, but Eisen quickly dismisses them with a knee lift to the gut, which doubles Otaku over.
Joe Hoffman: That was a bit low, don’t you think Boettcher?
Benny Newell: Shut up Joe! Just PLEASE… SHUT… UP. You’d think by now that you would know Trip Eisen rarely plays by the rules, if ever.
Eisen hooks Otaku with a facelock and prepares to lift him into a Vertical Suplex, but Otaku blocks it with his leg, blocks yet another attempt at the suplex, and finally blocks a third suplex until he is the one to roll up Eisen.
He notches a two count as well as Trip gets his shoulder up just in the nick of time. Bringing Eisen to his feet, Otaku lands several hard punches that appear to weaken the fork-wielding cheater. Otaku flies off the ropes and charges at Trip, but Trip ducks the Lariat, bounces off the ropes himself and nails a beautiful Cross-Body into a pin.
This time, Otaku kicks out after 1 and a half and is back on the defensive while Eisen pummels away at him.
Joe Hoffman: Well Benny, it appears that Eisen doesn’t have any ring rust, as he’s clearly in control of this match against Otaku.
Benny Newell: It’s TACO! TA – CO! Taco. Say it with me now…
While Joe scoffs at Benny’s childish behavoir, Otaku’s desperation sets in as Eisen applies a Side-Headlock, only for Johnny to push him off into the ropes and hit a huge Drop Kick that has Trip holding his jaw. Boettcher drops for another pin attempt, but Otaku has other ideas as he assists Eisen to his feet for the Otaku Driver.
Joe Hoffman: Otaku’s looking to end it here!
Otaku picks up Eisen with ease and nails him with his Unprettier-like finisher..
Joe Hoffman: OTAKU DRIVER..ITS OVER!!
Otaku makes the cover as Boettcher makes the count..
Bryan McVay: WINNER OF THE BOUT IN 5 MINUTES AND 22 SECONDS..JOHNNY OTAKU!!
The crowd gives Otaku a respectable ovation as Boettcher holds his arm up in victory as the action cuts backstage.
The camera cuts away from the match to the lockerroom of the arena. James Ranger is seemingly wrapping some tape around his feet, when knocking is heard at the doorway. Before he can turn answer, the sounds of high heels clicking on the floor come in. The person immediately sits next to James and crosses her legs, smiling all the while.
Mia Long: You look tense?
James Ranger: Well, I think this guy might be a little tough. Not tough as nails, but he’s been taking his vitamins.
Mia Long: So You got this in the bag?
James Ranger: Never can tell. So long as he brings the heat, i will bring it too. Set the ring ablaze with our skills and see whose the better man, but we already know whose the better man.
Mia Long: And that’s you.
James Ranger: Correct.
James gets up and cracks his knuckles and neck, and begins to punch and kick the air for a few minutes. Mia realizes something and also stands up, taking a paper out of her pocket.
Mia Long: Oh yeah. You got this memo from the human resource department.
James stops to take the paper from Mia. He reads it over, but looking back at Mia.
James Ranger: Mayhem?!
Mia Long: Seems you got traded.
James Ranger: Slightly weird. Meh, no worries. Guess i have to greet and beat new people; and i was just getting comfortable in this place. Well, lets take another commercial break, we will be right back folks!
Where is Mike Best? Where is the EPU?
The Price is Right?
Back from commercial and a video begins to play for the viewers at home and on the High Octane Vision screen for everyone inside The Best Arena.
Alpha Banking Headquarters, Penthouse level, Suite of Jason C. Davis.
“Mr. Davis, call on line one.”
“Thanks Cheryl, I’ll take it from here…”
“Hello? Ah, Mr. Carrol. Yes, yes I’ve looked over the documents and it pains me to inform you that we’re going to have to decline your loan…Yes I am aware that you’re the manager of a multi-million dollar company…I’m sorry Mr. Carrol, but Alpha Banking only does business with the top of the line, the best of the best – you know this…I have no time to listen to your childish outbursts Mr. Carrol, good luck in your future endeavors – bye now.
“Mr. Davis, call on line one again.”
I swear if it’s that prick calling again pleading for a 2nd consideration…
“Who is it Cheryl?”
“Um…he said his name was Raiyn. He sounds a bit strange, should I decline the call?”
“NO! I mean, um, no…I’ll take the call, this should be um…humorous.”
“Raiyn! I thought we had an agreement that you weren’t going to call me at my place of business!? No, no I’m sorry I wasn’t snapping at you. Yes, I apologize, no, no please I want to hear the news….What…? …I’m in?…Yes, yes I can come down right away Mr. Raiyn. And you heard this from Mr. Lee Best himself? Right, excellent, and no I would never doubt you, you know that Mr. Raiyn. Ok, I’m on my way.
Keys…Where the fuck are my keys!?…There they are, the time has finally come.
“Cheryl, you have the day off, close the office down.”
“But Mr. Davis its only 12 o’clock in the afterno-“
“I said close the office down Cheryl! I have more pressing matters to attend to.”
They’ll never see it coming…
HOW’s newest superstar, Jay Davis. Fighting comes first, business comes last.
The video then ends and there is a buzz in the arena over the new signee as the action cuts back live and inside the ring..
Nijs Landzaat vs. Black Mamba
Already inside of the ring stand Joel Hortega and Nijs Landzaat. Landzaat stretches his large self out by using the top rope to loosen up.
Brian McVay: Making is HOW debut, NIJS LANDZAAT!!!!!
Nijs receives a mixed reaction from the crowd as nobody knows what to think of him.
“Rock the Party” by Benizo begins to blare over the sound system as Black Mamba emerges with Mia at his side. Mamba is wearing black slacks and sunglasses while Mia is looking sexy in her miniskirt and shirt that show plenty of skin.
Brian McVay: Coming down the aisle escorted by Mia, BLACK MAMBA!!!!!!!!
Black Mamba leaps and jumps on the turnbuckle and lifts his arms to try and get the crowd on his side before he starts to make a cutthroat gesture towards Nijs. Landzaat wastes no time and charges at the vulnerable Black Mamba, and grabs him from the turnbuckle and launches him into the center of the ring.
Joe Hoffman: What a start! Landzaat just tossed Black Mamba like a rag doll into the middle of the ring.
Benny Newell: Speaking of a Black Mamba, look at Mia, she looks like she enjoys a black mamba, if you know what I mean.
DING – DING – DING
Nijs Landzaat quickly moves over to the downed Black Mamba and executes a guillotine leg drop. Gets up, and hits a second one. He then drags his opponent up, hoists him up on his shoulder and walks around in a circle before slamming Mamba back onto the mat. Landzaat continues punishing Black Mamba with ground strikes before picking him up once again, hoisting him on his shoulder. He spins around in a circle again before executing a shoulder breaker, as he drops Mamba’s right shoulder down onto his knee.
Joe Hoffman: Nijs Landzaat looking impressive here in the early going. Really dominating this match up against Black Mamba thus far.
Benny Newell: Stop saying those words.
Joe Hoffman: What words?
Benny Newell: Zaaaaaat and Black Mamba.
Joe Hoffman: Why, that is their names.
Benny Newell: It brings back bad memories.
The action continues with Landzaat picking up Black Mamba and tossing him against the ropes. Nijs Landzaat attempts to execute a big boot to the face, but Mamba is able to duck under the boot and spear Landzaat in his crotch area down to the mat. Mamba slowly gets to his feet, as does Landzaat. Landzaat is up first and charges at Mamba who spins around and kicks his charging opponent in the face. Landzaat stumbles backwards, turning as he holds his face. Mamba charges him and bulldogs him down to the mat, sending Landzaat down face first.
Mamba gets up, dragging his opponent up with him, he hooks Landzaat’s arm over his head and nails a snap suplex. Black Mamba continues to remain in control as he executes a Reverse Russian Leg Sweep, Inverted DDT, and Atomic Drop in succession.
Joe Hoffman: Black Mamba has turned the tables on Landzaat and is now in control.
Benny Newell: I said to stop saying those words!
Joe Hoffman: Benny, I have to say their names.
Benny Newell: It reminds me of a time when a cop caught me with a hooker in my car down a dark alley. While she was on top of me she had me stick something she called the black mamba in her ass. I was enjoying it until I saw the cop lights. I freaked out, and tried to get away on foot and all I heard was ZAAAAAAT….and I was on the ground, tazed. Terrible memory.
Joe Hoffman: Thank you for sharing that Benny.
Mamba decides that this is an opportune time for a quick cover and goes for the pin on Nijs Landzaat, hooking the leg. Joel Hortega slides to the mat and makes the count.
Landzaat lifts his shoulder up. Angrily, Black Mamba gets up and tosses Landzaat into the ropes. Mamba heads the opposite way.
Joe Hoffman: It looks like Black Mamba is going for his high-risk finisher, the Hooked Fang! This could be it!
Mamba leaps onto the top rope, backflips off and tries to find Nijs Landzaat who is nowhere to be seen, and Mamba crashes down onto the mat. Landzaat had held onto the ropes and just smirks as he walks over to the fallen Black Mamba. He grabs Black Mamba and throws him between his legs and hoists his body up before dropping him to the mat for a pile driver. He then grabs the downed Mamba and throws him between his legs again. This time he hoists him up high and then tosses him onto the mat for a huge powerbomb.
Joe Hoffman: The tides have quickly turned in this match.
Nijs Landzaat walks over to Black Mamba and picks him up once again. He lifts him up by the neck this time and hoists Mamba into the air, and just holds him high in the air for a few seconds before dropping him to the mat with a thunderous choke slam. Landzaat then lays on him for the pin. Joel Hortega runs over for the count.
Brian McVay: The winner of the match in 8 minutes and 11 seconds….NIJS LANDZAAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Joe Hoffman: Well that sure was a dominating return to the HOW ring for one Nijs Landzaat and I am sure Mamba will learn from this match as he heads over to Mayhem.
Benny Newell: Blah blah fucking blah…its time for Going Hollywood isn’t it…..so ya shut the fuck up and lets air it!!
Joe Hoffman: Um…oooook….folks its time to hear from our High Octane Fighting Champion but first we have a quick advertisement for the Hall of Fame career that was Bobbinette Carey’s!
Bobbinette Carey went out a winner vs. Kirsta Lewis at RATR 2!
Back from the video for HOW Hall of Famer Bobbinette Carey, we now cut to another part of The Best Arena…
Announcer: LIVE from Studio 2A inside The Best Arena, this is Going Hollywood with Michael DeNucci! On tonight’s show, the first-ever High Octane Fighting Champion celebrates his victory over Chris Kostoff for the High Octane Fighting Championship! And now, your host…MICHAEL DENUCCI!
The crowd in the arena itself boos immensely as “The Headhunter” Michael DeNucci steps into the studio, designed to resemble a swanky, sophisticated lounge. Those in the studio, however, see things differently; mainly as a result of the money they’re being paid to be there. DeNucci shakes hands with a few of the trendy, beautiful people he’s filled the club with, before making his way over to the roped-off VIP section, where an electric blue water wall serves as a backdrop for a luxurious couch and a glass table, upon which a bottle of Hypnotic sits. DeNucci bumps fists with the menacing-looking bouncer protecting the area, and the man unhooks the velvet rope for Michael, who steps into the section and sits down on the couch.
DeNucci: Yo, what up, welcome to Going Hollywood! My name is Michael DeNucci, but you jabronis can call me the FIRST-EVER HIGH OCTANE FIGHTING CHAMPION!
The applause of the club goers is drowned out by the lusty boos of the arena crowd.
DeNucci: That’s right, you hicks out in the arena can talk all the shit you want, but not only did I hang with your boy Kostoff, I beat his ass all over that fucking prison yard!
Michael high-fives someone just outside the rope who looks like an unholy fusion of Spencer Pratt and Mike “Boogie” Malin. God help us all.
DeNucci: So you’re probably wondering where the fuck the gold is. Well, I got a surprise special guest for you all. Tonight, LIVE on Going Hollywood, we will have the presentation of the High Octane Fighting Championship belt! And presenting that belt to me will be a man in this game I respect like no other. This son of a bitch has been in the fight game almost longer than I’ve been alive. He is a former UFC Light Heavyweight Champion and UFC Heavyweight Champion, and he’s taught me everything I know. Long story short? This guy’s a Natural.
The crowd in the club starts to cheer as “8th and Blues” by Ram Façade begins to play, and DeNucci makes the official introduction.
DeNucci: Ladies and gentlemen, officially presenting the High Octane Fighting Championship title to me, please welcome THE NATURAL…RAAAANDY COUTUUUURE!!!
The wrestling crowd in the arena loathes the display of arrogance on DeNucci’s part, while the crowd in Studio 2A has either made its peace with it, or doesn’t care what Michael does so long as the check clears. Meanwhile, Randy Couture enters the club, flanked by Xtreme Couture coaches Neil Melanson and Ron Fraizer. Noticeably absent is former Xtreme Couture coach Shawn Tompkins, now rumored to be aligned with the TapouT Gym. Nonetheless, the thing that matters most is in Randy’s hands: the High Octane Fighting Championship belt.
Couture and DeNucci shake hands as Couture is ushered into the VIP section, and The Natural takes a microphone.
Couture: Ladies and gentlemen out there in the Best Arena, as well as here in Studio 2A tonight, please stand in celebration of the FIRST EVER HIGH OCTANE FIGHTING CHAMPION!
The club goers are down for that, but the wrestling crowd? Not so much. DeNucci takes the microphone.
DeNucci: Here, Randy, let me try…HEY! INBRED MOTHERFUCKING SNUFF FILM-WATCHING, FAKE FIGHT LOVING PIECES OF SHIT! GET ON YOUR FUCKING FEET AND SHOW ME THE RESPECT I FUCKING DESERVE, OR I’LL CALL IN A FAVOR TO LEE AND HAVE HIM SHUT THIS FUCKING SHOW DOWN RIGHT NOW!!
Some (and by some, I mean Mitch Deusner) would argue that the crowd responds by showing DeNucci exactly the amount of respect he deserves: none. The Best Arena crowd boos DeNucci with a passion, not appreciating his threats to throw his weight around.
DeNucci: Fuck it, let’s just do this thing, Randy.
Couture: Sure thing, Michael. On behalf of Lee Best and the High Octane Fighting Championship, it is my honor to present this title belt to the first HOFC Champion…THE HEADHUNTER…MICHAEL DENUCCI!!
Melanson and Fraizer snap the belt around DeNucci’s waist, to the sound of more boos from the arena crowd.
DeNucci: Thanks fellas, it means a lot to have you guys backing me. Now then, now that I’ve been properly anointed as the HOFC Champion, let’s talk a little about the future. I mean, let’s face it, nobody in this fucking place is good enough to face me for the belt, but hell, I gotta fight somebody. So here’s what’s going down…over the next several weeks, eight of the so-called best fighters in the game are gonna battle it out in a tournament. The winner of that tournament is gonna take me on for the belt at ICONIC.
The crowds in the club and the arena agree on something for a change, as both cheer this announcement.
DeNucci: But you know what? None of that means a fucking thing, because there is NO MAN ON EARTH that is going to take this fucking belt from me! I-
DeNucci is cut off by a piece of music very familiar to HOW fans, and the Best Arena crowd is thrilled to hear it. It’s the music of none other than…
DeNucci: Bobbinette Carey?
Indeed, the recently retired Queen B is making her way through the club, having somehow evaded security. She strides toward the VIP section, but the bouncers block her path.
DeNucci: Guys, let her through.
On orders from their boss, the bouncers open the rope for Carey, as DeNucci glares harshly at her.
DeNucci: The fuck are you doing here, Carey? Last I heard, your ass was retired.
Carey: You’re right, DeNucci; earlier this week, I retired from wrestling for good. But that shiny gold belt around your waist…that’s not a wrestling title, is it?
The crowd roars, seeing where Bobbinette Carey is going with this, as DeNucci raises an eyebrow questioningly.
Carey: DeNucci, you were right about one other thing: there’s no man on earth that’s going to take your title from you…there’s a woman, and it’s ME!
DeNucci delivers what can only be described as a WTF face, pure shock emanating from his body.
Carey: That’s right, the Queen B is about to become the Queen of the HOFC! You see, when I beat that diseased, nasty, skankopotamus Kirsta Lewis at Rumble at the Rock 2, I got a taste of blood and violence like I never had before. I got a bloodlust, DeNucci, and now I want MORE! And I know the best place to get it is right here in the HOFC!
DeNucci (sotto voce, to Couture): Is she on crack?
Carey (heard it anyway): No, unlike the whores you and Lee enjoy the company of, I’m clean, and I’m ready to take that belt from you just as fast as you got it!
DeNucci is at his boiling point now.
DeNucci: Alright, B, you really want into this world? You really want more violence, and more blood? Be careful what you wish for, Carey, because you just fucking got it!
Before Carey can respond, DeNucci’s leg is already in the air, delivering a well-placed high right kick to the side of Bobbinette’s head. The force of the unexpected kick separates Carey from her senses, and she drops to the floor. Smirking, DeNucci steps over her and heads for the exit, Xtreme Couture in tow.
DeNucci: Welcome to the HOFC and when you wake up the rest of the idiots in the back can tell you that you have been entered into the first ever HOFC Tournament…Ya that’s right…all you wannabe fucking fighters are going to have to battle it out and whoever wins the tourney…gets me at ICONIC..
DeNucci pauses and smirks as Couture begins clapping at the big announcement..
DeNucci: Guys, that about wraps shit up here on Going Hollywood. I wanna thank my guys from Xtreme Couture for joining me tonight. I wanna give a special shoutout to Shawn Tompkins, even though he ditched us yesterday. So I’m Michael DeNucci, and your asses just went Hollywood!
DeNucci almost gets to the exit, but stops and turns around for a brief moment.
DeNucci: Oh, and one more thing…the first fight in the HOFC tournament is up next…JACOBS VERSUS THE OLD MAN HIMSELF..CHRIS KOSTOFF!!
DeNucci and company roll out of the club, and we cut to commercial…
High Octane Fighting is proudly sponsored by hot bitches that drink Budweiser beer
Chris Jacobs vs. Chris Kostoff
Joe Hoffman: Were back and huge news from DeNucci’s Going Hollywood where we learned there is going to be a huge 8 man tournament where the winner will get a shot at DeNucci’s HOFC title at ICONIC. We also saw the return of Bobbinette Carey and we learned she will be stepping into the HOFC division and vying to take that title from DeNucci.
Benny Newell: Fuck Bobbinette….fuck HOFC….all I want is someone to take my call about my damn car.
Joe Hoffman: Also while we were gone Benny has been franticly talking with his insurance agent about his totaled car. How is that going for you Benny?
Benny Newell: Fuck off Joe, they say I might not be covered….Can someone get me another bottle of Jack!
Joe Hoffman: Well while Benny finds some more booze were gonna get our HOFC bout of the night underway. So let’s head down to the basement of The Best Arena.
The camera cuts from ringside to the dimly lit basement of The Best Arena where we see Chris Kostoff and Chris Jacobs facing with referee Rick Stevens standing in between then two men.
Bryan McVay: The following is a first round match up in the HOFC number one contenders tournament and is a HOFC bout, which is scheduled for three rounds. In the blue corner from Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island, Canada and weighing in tonight at 175 pounds…making his HOW return tonight….Chris Jacobs!!
Jacobs stands looking at Kostoff with a smile on his face as he raises his right arm in the air as his name is announced.
Joe Hoffman: There have been some words exchanged between these two and this should be an evenly matches and intense fight. Jacobs has something to prove here, that he still has it, and Kostoff needs to save face in the HOFC division after a tough loss to DeNucci at Rumble at the Rock. And most importantly, the winner moves on in the tournament, and the looser is done.
Bryan McVay: And in the red corner, from Tampa, Florida and weighing in tonight at 285 pounds…Chris Kostoff!!
Calm for the moment, Kostoff just looks at the somewhat cocky Jacobs as referee Rick Stevens checks both the competitors and gives them some last minute words as he calls for the bell to get the bout way.
Joe Hoffman: We are scheduled for three, five minute rounds here tonight, unless the bout is ended by knockout, submission or referee stoppage. If we go all three rounds the HOFC judges will decide the match.
Benny Newell: Jack is back! Did I miss the match?
Joe Hoffman: No, the BOUT is just starting.
Benny Newell: Damn!
Jacobs starts off confident as he takes a few quick jabs at Kostoff, which he dodges. Kostoff counters with a jab of his own which Jacobs dodges and then counters with a kick that connects with the side of Kostoff’s head which sends him stumbling back. Jacobs stays on Kostoff with a quick one two punch combo which lands and we see a bit of blood trickle from the left eyebrow of Kostoff.
Joe Hoffman: Jacobs showing that he hasn’t really lost a step as he has Kostoff reeling early in this bout. And we already have our first sight of blood in this match as Jacobs connects big with two sharp punches.
Benny Newell: Maybe….Maybe I can get Lee to buy me a new car…a Hummer personally given by Krista Le..….
Joe Hoffman: Not a chance Benny, Krista is on Mayhem now.
Seeing blood Jacobs delivers a spinning back fist to Kostoff, which knocks him down to the mat. Jacobs goes to drop an elbow but Kostoff rolls out of the way and quickly locks in a chokehold on as Jacobs quickly tries to fight his way out of it. Referee Rick Stevens asks Jacobs if he wants to give up but he refuses too.
Joe Hoffman: A small slip up by Jacobs and Kostoff has taken control here with a chokehold, which if Jacobs can’t escape soon will be the end out this bout.
Benny Newell: My poor car couldn’t escape…I really loved that car too…
Benny knocks back a double shot of Jack as Jacobs continues to fight the chokehold and is finally able to free an arm and elbow Kostoff in the stomach causing him to release the hold as we hit the 30 second mark of the round. Not even getting up Jacobs lands a hard punch to the face of Kostoff and mounts him as Kostoff covers up as Jacobs continues trying to land shots until the bell rings and Rick Stevens quickly separates both men.
Joe Hoffman: And with round one over I would have to say that Jacobs won that, even though Kostoff almost chokes him out near the end. Going to be interesting to see how round two goes here.
Kostoff wipes the small amount of blood away from his eye as Jacobs takes a few deep breathes to make sure he has his wind back as referee Rick Stevens calls for the bell to start round two of the bout and this time Kostoff takes a more aggressive approach as he quickly and quickly lands a punch on Jacobs who counters back with a punch of his own that connects. Both men smile as they trade punches again and Jacobs comes in with a kick to the side of Kostoff who nods his head and continues to smile.
Joe Hoffman: I don’t know if Kostoff is trying to play mind games with Jacobs or if he is trying to hide the fact that Jacobs has a speed advantage, one he is using well on Kostoff who outweighs Jacobs by over 100 pounds.
The two stare each other down and once again trade a couple of punches and Jacobs again goes for a kick but on the other side but Kostoff this times catches Jacobs leg and counters with an uppercut that catches Jacobs right on the jaw and send him straight down to the mat.
Joe Hoffman: What a shot by Kostoff, can Jacobs get up from that?
Jacobs hits the mat and Kostoff goes in for the kill but referee Rick Stevens steps in and waves his arms signaling that Jacobs is knocked out and that the bout is over and calls for the bell.
Bryan McVay: The winner of this bout via knock out in 2 minutes and 5 seconds into the second round….Chris Kostoff!!
Joe Hoffman: Looks like Jacobs won’t be getting up from that Kostoff punch, as the HOW vet steps back up and shows why he is a top player in the HOFC division. But one also has to give credit to Chris Jacobs who had a hell of a return to HOW.
Benny Newell: Yes but now he is the first man out of the HOFC tournament.
Stevens raises Kostoff arm as “Deuces” by Achozen plays and Kostoff makes his way towards the stairs, exiting the basement of The Best Arena as the HOW trainers attend to Chris Jacobs who is starting to move once again as we cut to somewhere backstage.
You got us Twisted..
Coming right from the HOFC bout we cut to the parking lot area where we see an ambulance and a stretcher which Kelly is on and being loaded into the ambulance. We see Scottywood, still blood on his face from the Maurako’s attack earlier in the night. Johnny Stevens is helping Frankie stand who is still feeling woozy from the attack.
Scottywood: I’ll be at the hospital soon Kelly, I promise. I just have one thing to take care of here.
Johnny: Scotty, you might want to think this through before you go back in there.
Scottywood: Think? They fucking attack us, and then lay out Kelly…my fiancé, in the middle of the ring with their fuckin Tag Team titles. I’m going to kill them, all fuckin four of them. Whack-o-Meter? Should be more like a Whack-off-Meter.
Scottywood: Think about it every woman that Mario hits is a woman that he can’t get. Thus him having to whack off instead of actually getting a woman to fuck him. That is the only reason a man hits a woman, because they are not man enough to get them to like them. And with a total of 1130 whacks it is surprising his dick hasn’t fallen off yet.
Frankie: Or that he hasn’t gone blind.
Johnny: You do make a solid point Scotty….but please think about going back in there. Your not going to help anyone if you go back to jail.
Scottywood: No, I am gonna find Mario and his fuckin family and I am going to beat the living shit out of them until someone has to carry them out in a body bag.
Johnny: You’re in no condition to do that Scotty, my head is still ringing and Frankie can’t even stand on his own. You’ll have no backup and they will have a four on one advantage.
Frankie: I don’t know if I am going to make it Scotty, avenge my death!
Scottywood: Suck it up Frankie, Matteo barely even touched you. Your acting like a bitch….or Juvian Ramorez. Maybe I should throw you into that HOFC tournament and toughen you up some.
Frankie eyes suddenly light up at the though of him being in the HOFC tournament and winning the HOFC title.
Frankie: Really? You think I could win the HOFC title?
Scottywood: You kidding me? Hell no. But it would make you a little bit more of a man.
EMT: We really should have someone come with us to the hospital Mr. Woodson.
Johnny: Go with her Scotty, we’ll take care of Mario and his family next week.
Scottywood: Fuck….fine, but I hope Mario knows that this is just the start of something that is going to get very ugly. He thinks we are a joke, he may not take us seriously, but believe me, Twisted Reality is going to soon become one hell of a headache and nightmare for The Maurako Family.
Climbing into the ambulance they close the door and speed away from The Best Arena, leaving Johnny and a now able to stand on his own Frankie.
Frankie: The Frankster….HOFC champion! It has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it Johnny?
Johnny: Lee would have to be fuckin desperate to allow you to enter that tournament. So keep dreaming Frankie, because that is the closet to the HOFC belt your ever going to get. Now let’s go grab our shit and head over to the hospital to see Kelly.
Johnny chuckles at the thought of Frankie winning HOW gold as he makes his way back into The Best Arena as Frankie starts to pout and slowly follows Johnny back in the arena.
We are taken to the parking lot of the Best Arena as the distant sound of an engine roaring can be heard. Suddenly a black custom Hummer Golfcart pulls into view with two Maxopotamian Flags on it. The newly reintroduced Road Maxter 9000 pulls up to the side of the curb as Maximillian Kael steps out of it wearing his wrestling gear and black fedora.
Wincing as he cracks his neck, the former ICON champion can be seen to be sporting various white bandages around his chest and arms. Suddenly the sound of a second engine roars into life as another golf cart appears!
Pulling into the parking lot can only be described as an armored golf cart with a custom paint job. Completely customized, the exterior is solid black with gold lettering that reads “JATTMOBILE 10001”. The sounds of Blue Oyster Cult’s “Don’t Fear the Reaper” are heard as the door to the JATTMOBILE 10001 opens, the ignition kills both the engine, and the stereo.
Jatt Starr emerges wearing khakis, blue and gray sneakers, and a black baseball jersey with silver lettering and blue trim that reads “JATT STARR” on the front and “THE KING OF GRAPPLE FROM THE BIG APPLE” on the back.
Starr looks over at Max then at the ROAD MAXTER then back at Max then back at the ROAD MAXTER and then back at Max. Starr rolls his eyes and is about to says something at the same time Max’s face flushes red as he lifts an accusing finger toward Jatt Starr as if to say something to him when suddenly yet another car pulls up however it is noticably quieter then both golfcarts some how..
A Golden Prius pulls into a spot. Golden Phoenix rolls down his window and looks outside to see that his tires are touching the lines on one side. Not wanting to be double parked, Phoenix throws the car in reverse and backs up. Kael and Starr look at each other, then at the Prius as it is pulled into the spot, perfectly centered. Phoenix turns off the ignition and exits the car wearing his golden pants with “Phoenix” written down the pant leg, and a black t-shirt with a golden outline of a phoenix on the front. Phoenix closes the door and walks over towards Starr and Kael, who…
Golden Phoenix: Traded in the Camaro. The Prius is friendlier to the environment.
Jatt Starr: The Prius? REALLY? Granted it is certainly eco-friendly but it certainly will not protect from the impending zombie attacks. Whereas the JATTMOBILE 10001 is both bulletproof and fire resistant, the modifications for my JATTMOBILE will not only protect me and my family from zombie attacks, but also from heavily armed brigands and thieves. But, Golden Goose or whatever you call yourself, it’s better than a Camaro.
Golden Phoenix: Everyone knows that most zombies are blind and use their sense of hearing to judge things. That’s where my silent prius will keep me safe.
Jatt Starr: That’s naive to think that since some zombies still have their eyesight and it is not just their sense of hearing that helps track down food i.e. people who are alive, but their sense of smell. But aside from the zombies, you have to worry about armed brigands; your Prius has no protection against a lunatic firing a .357 magnum at your windshield.
Max Kael: SHUTUP! Everyone knows that the Zombie Invasion is barely a thought compared to the Elf conspiracy which gnaws at the roots of society like a black cancerous plague that will some day reach it’s festering arm up to strangle the unknowing with tiny, hateful hands! Now if you do not mind, we need to get to the ring.. like.. YESTERDAY!
Max’s rant seems to catch the other two men off guard for a moment before all three men glare at each other, neither man willing to back down about their own bizarre case. With nothing further to discuss Jatt Starr, Max Kael, and Golden Phoenix begin walking out of the parking lot and inside the arena.
Jatt Starr initially takes the lead but Max Kael begins walking faster until he overtakes Jatt Starr, who in turn, begins walking faster until they get to the door. Both men look at each other and then at the door handle and then they look into each other’s eyes like two gunslingers trying to read other into who will draw first. Golden Phoenix nonchalantly walks between them and holds open the door as Max Kael and Jatt Starr both try to walk through the door at the same time.
Jatt: Let me through!
Max Kael: Let ME through!
Jatt: I will! If you let me go first!
Jatt: No? What do you mean “no”?
Golden Phoenix: Can’t all three of us walk to the ring at the same time?
Jatt: I suppose we can do what Golden Phonix says.
Max: You mean Phoenix.
Max: I will if you will.
Golden Phoenix: Okay then.
Jatt Starr slowly moves away from door to the outside as Max Kael enters the building. Golden Phoenix follows grabbing Max Kael’s shoulder to ensure he doesn’t take off. Jatt Starr enters.
Jatt: Okay…let’s go…
Golden Phoenix: Together now.
All three wrestlers start walking in unison when suddenly Max Kael begins walking a little faster, this in turn causes Jatt Starr to walk faster. Kael then walks even faster, taking the lead. Jatt Starr in response, walks even faster, moving ahead of Max Kael. Max Kael immediately trips Jatt Starr and breaks out in a run.
Jatt: YOU DIRTY DINK-A-DOO!
Jatt Starr is up and breaks out in a run chasing after Max Kael who is hightailing down the corridor, knocking down garbage cans as he passes them to obstruct the closing Jatt Starr. Jatt Starr hurtles over the first garbage can but slips on the second as Max Kael turns and laughs as Golden Phoenix walks towards them in the background.
Jatt Starr is up, Max Kael responds by running through the curtain, and down the ramp towards the ring. The fans errupt in boos as Max appears however they quickly change over to cheers as Jatt Starr appears from the curtain, gaining on Max Kael. Max hurriedly enters the ring followed by Jatt Starr, who slides under the bottom rope and lays motionless and winded.
Max falls too his knees and holds his arms up toward the sky yelling as if he had just won an olympic sprint as the fans continue to cheer loudly at the sudden and some what unamazing entrance of Jatt Starr into the Best Arena.
Golden Phoenix slowly makes his way down to the ring with a confused look on his face as Max Kael climbs a near by turn buckle to celebrate. Jatt slowly pulls himself up to his feet as Golden Phoenix rolls in next to him. Max calls for a mic which is tossed to him. Lifting it to his lips Max jumps back down into the ring.
Max Kael: Well, well, well! It seem’s tha-
Phoenix moves next to Max and he can be seen saying something to Max. Max lowers the mic and looks to be arguing with Phoenix as Jatt Starr steps over and snatches the Mic from Max’s hand as the fans jump to their feet. Max looks to say something but Golden Phoenix grabs his shoulder and draws him back so Jatt can talk.
Jatt: The Ruler of Jattlantis is BACK in HOW!!!
The crowd erupts in cheers.
Jatt: Now, the question on everyone’s mind is “Why?” Why would the Ruler of Jattlantis, the King of Grapple from the Big Apple, the Ratings Juggernaut, Jatt Starr screw Trent out of the HOW Cham—
Max Kael walks in front of Jatt Starr and stares at him.
Jatt: What are you doing?
Max Kael remains silent and maintains an intense stare.
Jatt: Max, do you mind? I didn’t interrupt you when you spoke.
Max Kael still has his eyes locked on Jatt Starr’s.
Jatt: Seriously, you are starting to freak me out a bit.
Jatt Starr begins to move when Max Kael leaps up in the air and shouts:
Max: I WIN!
Jatt: You win? Win what?
Max: Max Kael: Three. Jatt Starr: ZERO!
Jatt: What the hell are you jibber jabbering about?
Max: I have beaten the Ruler of Jattlantis THREE times in one night!
Jatt: I must have missed Sportscenter, how are coming to that conclusion?
Max: I beat you in the race to the ring. I beat you in the foot tapping contest and now, I beat you in the staring contest.
Jatt: STARING—? HOW CAN YOU BEAT ME IN A COMPETITION I HAD NO IDEA I WAS COMPETING IN?
Max: I don’t know but it happened. Three and Oh!
Jatt: You are out of your mind,
Max: I am faster than you. I am a better foot tapper than you. And I am the better starer than you!
Jatt: Um…You cheated, you cheated, and there was no staring competition.
Max: Sore loser.
Jatt Starr just stares at Max Kael and just moves away from him.
Jatt: ANYWAY….Why did I screw over Trent? I would like to say to Trent. Sorry. It’s nothing personal. I’m sure on some level you are deserving to be a champion, but not while you have aligned yourself with Lee Best. In effect, I was not screwing over you, Trent. I was screwing over Lee Best. For far too long, I was blinded by the promises of accolades, money, power, and endorsements. What did it get me?
Jatt Starr thinks about it for a moment.
Jatt: Okay, so it got me money, accolades, power, and endorsements. But at what cost to myself? I want these fans to believe in me. I want to look at my son and tell him I was HOW Champion and not feel like I gave up my soul to do it. Most importantly, I want my son to be proud of me. That’s just the first part.
The second part of it is….Justice. For far too long Lee Best has used and abused his power to no end. How many people have lost their eyes to satisfy his sick ego? How many people have been forced to do something degrading with Besty to provide amusement for him? Lee Best, while a good promoter is also a corrupt, manipulative sadist and misogynist. For far too long we have had to deal with his….forgive my language….and honey, please cover the baby’s ears….BULLSHIT!
The crowd erupts as Jatt Starr uses a VERY rare profanity.
Jatt: Yeah, I’m exercising my First Amendment right for Free Speech! The fact is, Lee Best treats people like garbage and thinks he is above the law. He thinks there shouldn’t be consequences for his actions. Well, it’s time for a reality check! It’s time for Lee Best to start taking responsibility for his actions. Mission numero uno: Prevent Trent was stellar success. Lee, you will never EVER see that HOW Championship in the hands of the Best Alliance again! So bring in your little puppets….O’Neal and Trent….and let them suffer the Jatt Attack of Jattastrophic proportions that YOU so richly deserve.
And in closing Lee, you look fat!
Head to Ewtorch.com to check out how all your favorite HOW superstars rank!
Max Kael, Jatt Starr & Golden Phoenix vs. Mario Maurako, Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal & Trent
6 Man Tag Team Match
As we return from break Mario Maurako can be seen making his way down to the ring where Trent and Mark O’Neal are already set to go.
Joe Hoffman: Welcome back ladies and gentlemen! For those of you just joining us we are getting ready for our six man tag match pitting Mark O’Neal, Trent and Mario Maurako verses the odd pairing of Max Kael, Golden Phoenix and Jatt Starr.. What do you think Benny?
Benny Newell:..my fuck’n car!
Joe Hoffman: Yes… yes Benny, I have heard. What about the match?
Benny Newell: O’Neal wins by pinning Golden Kleenex.. There? Happy?
Hoffman tries to console Benny as Mark is selected to start the match off for his team. Meanwhile Jatt, Phoenix and Max argue on the outside as to what they should do. As Max and Jatt continue to argue Golden Phoenix climbs into the ring.
The bell rings as Max and Jatt turn their heads in time to see Golden Phoenix and Mark O’Neal tying up. Boettcher moves around the two as Mark forces the younger wrestler back into a corner before the ref intervenes. Mark slowly backs off before slapping Phoenix across the face which cases his face.
Boettcher warns O’Neal who smirks and shakes his head at Phoenix challenging the younger wrestler to do something about it. Phoenix keeps his cool and steps forward and prepares to lock up against the more experienced grappler once again.
Both men tie up again however this time Golden Phoenix takes the power advantage and twists Mark into a headlock. Mark counters by sending Phoenix into the ring ropes before the Phoenix returns with a thunderous close line taking Mark off his feet. O’Neal immediately roles out of the ring with a shocked look on his face as the fans roar for GP.
As Boettcher starts his count Mark paces outside the ring trying to figure out a new tactic while GP waves for him to come in, bending the ropes down for him. Mark decides to roll into the ring near his corner and tags in Trent who easily steps over the top rope. As Phoenix prepares to tie up Trent demands that Jatt enter the ring.
GP looks around at the fans that cheer loudly and chant for Jatt to come into the match for the first time. Answering the fans GP moves to his corner where Jatt holds out his tag..
Max immediately jumps out and snags the tag as the cheers switch over to boos. Sneering at Jatt, Max jumps out and stands toe to toe. Trent who glares down at Max who just robbed him of his chance to face Jatt before pie facing Max back. Max fires back by charging forward with a tackle to Trent’s leg just below his knee.
Trent drops to a knee as he holds his leg before Max comes back with a stiff kick to Trent’s head which only seems to piss off the big man. Max holds his hands up as if victorious as the fans boo with a mild cheer. Unfortunately due to his celebration Max is caught off guard by Trent as he rises back up with a thunderous short arm close line which takes Max off his feet.
As Max tries to get back up to his feet he is grabbed by Trent and throw into the ropes before running face first into a big boot from the big man. Trent drops down for a cover..
Max throws his shoulder up as Trent drags him back up to his feet. The big man hits a big body slam on Max and moves back to his corner tagging in Mario who slips in. Mario wanders around Max scratching his chin before he turns and tags in Mark who looks extremely surprised by it. Slipping in, Mark begins to aggressively kick at Max’s chest.
Hauling Max back up to his feet he throws Max into the ropes hitting a big drop kick which takes Max off his feet and down hard to the mat. Mark slips over for a cover..
Once again Max throws up his shoulder though Mark seems unsurprised. As Mark pulls Max up he is quickly kneed in the groin by the Minister. Boettcher doesn’t see it as Mark falls to the ground holding his groin while Max slips to the mat.
As both men slowly drag themselves to their corners the fans cheer on Max while GP and Jatt Starr hold out their hands waiting for a tag!
Mark snags the tag with Mario just as Max slaps Jatt’s hand! Jatt jumps into the ring and charges forward catching Mario with a quick close line! Trent attempts to get into the ring however he is hit with a stiff elbow from Jatt who sends Trent to the ground hard.
Mario attempts to get back up to his feet however he is taken off his feet once again by a high knee by Jatt Starr who knocks him to the ground. The crowd is rolling behind Jatt as he turns back to Mario hitting a scoop slam while the fans rally behind him. Mario gets back up slowly..
Mario jumps up holding his rear before he turns around..
TRENT WITH A BOOT TO THE BACK OF JATT’S HEAD!
Golden Phoenix runs into Trent’s chest as Jatt rolls off Mario holding the back of his head. GP reigns down a few stiff punches on Trent who is forced back but looks more irritated by the attacks then actually effected by it. Grabbing GP by the throat and threatening a choke slam he is suddenly blindsided by Max Kael who hits a double axe handle!
Once again Trent shrugs it off and grabs Max by the throat while he snarls at both. Suddenly Max and GP fire off twin kicks to the gut and hook Trent’s head..
All Chaos breaks out as Mark O’Neal charges back in tackling GP as he stands back up. Max rolls to the ropes as Jatt slowly makes his way back up to his feet. Boettcher tries to break up O’Neal and GP as Mario stumbles back up to his feet..
Suddenly Jatt spins Mario around..
Max sees the Falling Starr hit and he rushes forward as Trent slowly starts to pull himself up..
Boettcher turns around just in time to see Jatt and Max covering Trent and Mario when suddenly..
STANDING ALL OR NOTHING!
GP Covers O’Neal but it doesn’t matter as Jatt and Mario are the only legal men in the ring. Boettcher drops down..
WINNERS: JATT STARR, GOLDEN PHOENIX AND MAX KAEL IN 11 MINUTES AND 19 SECONDS!
The crowd comes alive as the cheers pour down! Joe Hoffman comments how all three men managed to score their own pinfalls however only Jatt Starr’s technically counted. Max jumps up and starts to celebrate as the ref holds up all three men’s hands!
Max looks confused and starts to argue with Boettcher who tells him that Jatt got the pin fall while all the other men continue to celebrate.
Matteo, Martino, and Mosé run down the ramp and they’ve brought some weapons with them. Martino rushes over and nails Jatt Starr in the back of the head with a tire iron and Jatt crumbles to the mat. Instantly Max Kael grabs his eye and drops to the mat seemingly looking for something on the mat. Golden Phoenix goes to help Jatt Starr but is attacked from behind by Matteo with a Crowbar to the knee. Phoenix goes down hard and grabs his knee.
Joe Hoffman: What in the hell is going on? The damn Maurako’s are out here destroying Jatt Starr and Golden Phoenix… and what the hell is Max Kael doing?
Benny Newell: It looks to me like he is looking for his contact.
Joe Hoffman: Kael wears contacts?
Benny Newell: If he doesn’t, I think he will be looking for it for a while.
Martino and Matteo pick Jatt up off of the canvas and hold him as Mosé jabs a wooden baseball bat into his stomach. Jatt bends over in pain and Mosé brings the bat down across the back of Jatt’s head. Golden Phoenix screams at the Maurako Family for their injustices as Mario enters the picture wielding a steel chair. Mario looks at Phoenix who tries to struggle and get away but is met with a barrage of blows from Mosé and the baseball bat.
The other Family Members hold Phoenix down as Maurako opens the steel chair and places it around the ankle of Golden Phoenix. Once the chair is in place Mario screams at Phoenix “Don’t mess with The Family!” and then Mario stomps on the chair.
Phoenix squirms around on the mat in excruciating pain as a smile crosses the face of Mario. Martino and Matteo pick Jatt Starr up from the ground and Jatt is just dead weight. Mario is handed his HOW Tag Team Title from Mosé and Mario slams the Tag Title Belt into Jatt Starr’s cranium and Jatt falls limply back down to the mat.
Joe Hoffman: Someone stop them, before they kill someone. Where in the hell are the EPU?
Happy with their handy work The Maurako’s stand tall over their punching bags and Mario places a foot on Jatt Starr’s chest. Max Kael is now on the outside of the ring and appears to pick something off of the ground.
Benny Newell: I think Max just found his contact.
Joe Hoffman: Oh how coincidental?
Max puts his contact in and is stunned to see the Maurako Family walking up the ramp and Jatt Starr & Golden Phoenix lying in the ring, one of which is unconscious and the other of which is writhing in pain as we cut to the backstage area…
We cut backstage where Graystone is sitting on a steel chair with his head in his hands. The crowd gives him a strong negative reaction, then dies down. He slowly lifts his head, and pulls his hair back out of his face revealing two dark, drooping eyes and a white bandage covering his forehead. He grabs ahold of the bandage, and slowly pulls it away, revealing a gnarly patchwork of stitches. He tosses the bandage on the ground, then leans forward and picks up a mirror placed on the ground in front of him. He holds it up and stares into it, tilting his head slightly to the side. Then, he closes his eyes and calmly places the mirror back down onto the floor.
Graystone stands, takes a deep breath, then stomps on the mirror with a furry, crunching it into a thousand pieces. The camera slowly pans up and pulls in on his face, as Graystone stands staring blankly ahead.
Graystone: Tonight… The ICONOCLAST is born.
Graystone closes his eyes, as the fans in the background are in a hushed silence.
The scene cuts back to the arena where Joe and Benny are sitting in silence. They pause, somewhat stunned and TNA cuts to commercial as the fans in the arena are buzzing.
Watch Kostoff fight his way thru the HOFC Tournament to get his rematch with DeNucci at ICONIC!!
MBB No More?
The cameras return from commercials inside of the office of Lee Best. It focuses on the nameplate before someone kicks the door in. The crowd can be heard buzzing as the camera hurries into the room, catching a shot of Best getting up from his chair before trying to focus.
Lee Best: Cavanaugh? What the fuck are you-
The camera finally turns to Ethan Cavanaugh, enraged. The camera turns back to Best, now also enraged moves forward but is stopped when Cavanaugh jams the end of a metal pipe into the front of Best’s throat. Best backs up a bit, a little shocked Cavanaugh was acting bolder now than before, but the pissed off look on his face never left.
Ethan Cavanaugh: Shut up! For once in your life you’re going to listen Best.
Cavanaugh backed Best up until he fell back into his chair. A murderous look took over Cavanaugh’s face as he races the pipe to point square at Best’s face.
Cavanaugh: You had a simple job. All you had to do was sit back and count the three. That’s it. But you couldn’t even do that you son of a bitch!
Lee Best: My job?! You’re job was to win the match you stupid fuck! You couldn’t even do that!
Cavanaugh: Because of you!
Best barely gets his head out of the way as Cavanaugh took a huge swing, burying the pipe into the wall behind Lee Best. The camera focuses on the pipe as Cavanaugh yanked it out of the wall, straightening his tie before turning back to Best.
Cavanaugh: You! You fucking egomaniac! Everything was under control until you stepped in. This is my career Best. Mine! You better not think that I’m just going to lay down at let you fuck me over! You screwed this up and you’re GAH!
The sound of popping electricity erupted as Trent shoves a cattle prod into Cavanaugh’s neck. Best grabs the pipe as it drops as Cavanaugh hits the ground, convulsing from the prod attack. Mark O’Neal comes racing in just as the cattle prod is taken away from his neck.
Lee Best: Get him up! Get him up!
Cavanaugh begins struggling as the two Best Alliance members grab an arm.
Cavanaugh’s struggling became more pronounced and it stops when someone hammers him on the back of the head. Cavanaugh folds over, stunned as he is again pulled up, kneeling in front of Lee Best.
Lee Best: You know what you cost me? Huh? You delusion fuck?!
Best rears back and hammers Cavanaugh with a vicious pipe shot on the head. His lackeys keep Cavanaugh from folding over as Best paces over him.
Lee Best: You fuck! You couldn’t even win one match for me! ONE MATCH! You know what that match cost me?!
Another sickening headshot definitely knocks the lights out in Cavanaugh’s eyes. Someone laughs in the background as Best takes another shot, this one cutting deep into the skull of Cavanaugh.
Lee Best: You still don’t get it yet do you? You work for me! FOR ME! You jump when I tell you to! You wrestle how I tell you to! I own you, got it?! I OWN YOU! FUCK YOU..FUCK BOBBINETTE CAREY….FUCK MY BROTHER..AND FUCK JATT FUCKING STARR!!!!!
One final, solid shot sends Cavanaugh to the ground. The group gets a good chuckle as the camera focuses on the crimson mask begin to fully cover Cavanaugh’s face as Best enters the picture, tapping the end of the pipe against Cavanaugh’s head.
Lee Best: But just in case that didn’t get through, maybe a few weeks getting your ass handed to you will teach you who runs HOW. So, until I say so, you’re not going to step into a Turmoil ring. Go fuck around in the HOFC and see if anyone gives a shit.
Best glares down at Cavanaugh before standing up. The camera stays focused on Cavanaugh bleeding into the carpet as it fades out.
Best off camera: Get this piece of shit of my office…and let Hortega know that the ICON Title match is now a no disqualification match…I want to see some fucking blood!!
Lee slams his fists down hard on his desk as Trent and Mark exit the office as the final image we see is of a bloody HOFC bound Ethan Cavanaugh.
Fisher Price feds are failing each and every day..will any be bought out by Lee Best?
HOW ICON Title Match
David Black vs. Graystone
No Disqualification Match
Back to ringside and the crowd stands on their feet as it is now time for the main event..
Joe Hoffman: Alright folks it is time for the big one and as we just found out..it’s now a No Disqualification match for the ICON Championship. This is the match that will either prove that David Black deserves to be moved up the rankings like so many internet people say he should….or
Benny Newell: He fucking EPIC FAILS and Lee trades him back to fucking Mayhem….
Joe Hoffman: Um…
Joe’s reply is saved as Survive by Lacuna Coil hits the airwaves and the LSD Champion David Black makes his way out from the back with the LSD Championship wrapped squarely around his waist.
Black makes his way down to the ring as there is a loud selection of the HOW fans who are actually cheering David Black who was often booed while on Mayhem.
Joe Hoffman: Well for those that don’t know David Black was traded here to Turmoil for Shane Reynolds and there really isn’t any bigger match he could have in his debut as a Turmoil guy…
Benny Newell: Ya ya ya. Everyone thinks he deserves an ICON Title shot..blah fucking blah. He is about to get it and he is about to regret it.
Joe Hoffman: Well we are about to find out that’s for sure. The fans here inside the Best Arena are actually cheering for Black and you gotta believe that its due to who his opponent is..
On cue “Hey Foxymophandlemama That’s Me” by Pearl Jam hits the Best Arena PA system and the ICON Champion Graystone makes his way out to a very loud chorus of boos.
Graystone pauses at the top of the ramp and smiles out to the fans as if he is getting exactly the type of reaction he wanted.
Joe Hoffman: Well here comes the man who surely cannot be 100% after his hellacious match with Maximillian Kael at Rumble at the Rock 2 and a man that has made it perfectly clear…he doesn’t care about the ICON title…a title that is almost if not more revered than the World Championship itself. A title that…
Benny Newell: Oh shut the fuck up Joe. Can we just focus on another Best Alliance win? I am sure Lee doesn’t care if Graystone dislikes the ICON Championship..as long as HE HAS the Championship…
Joe Hoffman: You are right Benny….and David Black has a chance to become the first double champion in HOW in a very very long time…years even.
Benny Newell: He has as much of a shot of winning this No DQ match as those fucknuts over in PCW have of actually making an impact here in HOW..
Joe Hoffman: Well they did make an impact on your car…
Benny Newell: Fuck off before I tell Graystone to fuck your uncle..
Joe goes to reply but instead just bites his tongue as inside the ring Graystone is holding the ICON title out towards Joel Hortega who reaches out to grab the title but Graystone drops it down on the canvas, never taking his eyes off of the LSD Champion, and just smiles as the crowd boos even louder at the total lack of respect Graystone has for the ICON Championship.
Hortega bends down and picks up the title and holds it high in the air to all four sides of the ring and after that he hands the title to a HOW crewmen who has already grabbed the LSD Title from Black, and then he signals for the bell and we are officially underway….
Joe Hoffman: Alright folks here we go…..No DQ…..for the ICON Title….it doesn’t get much bigger than this..
The LSD Champion wastes little time and charges right at the ICON Champion and clotheslines Graystone right over the top rope and the momentum of Black sends him over as well and the two Champions crash hard to the outside and the crowd is already buzzing as we are only seconds into the match and we have had our first big spot.
Both men start to get to their feet, but Black is up first, and he delivers a wicked kick to the head of the ICON Champion and it knocks Graystone back to the Best Arena floor.
Black stays on the offensive and grabs Graystone by the back of the head and walks him over to the steel steps and attempts to bounce the man’s head off the steel but Graystone is able to block the move with a quick elbow to the gut of Black and it is Graystone who drives the head of the LSD Champion hard into the steel ring steps……and he does it again…and again…and again…
The sound of Blacks head repeatedly hitting the steel steps begins to echo throughout the arena as the crowd is literally hushed by the violence orchestrated by the ICON Champion.
Joe Hoffman: Stop already…my God just stop..
But Graystone doesn’t stop until he sees blood dripping from the head of David Black and there is already a large puddle of the LSD Champions blood that has formed on the top step of steel ring steps.
Graystone lets Black go and the LSD champion slumps down to the Arena floor as Graystone stares at the puddle of the blood that is now slowly flowing down the steps and down the sides of the steps. Graystone then puts both hands in the puddle of blood and he begins wiping the blood of Black all over his face and then looks directly into the camera and mouths the word “ICONOCLAST”..
Benny Newell: Drink cause I don’t even fucking know what that word means..
With blood of his opponent covering his face, Graystone turns back towards Black who is slowly using the ring barrier to get to his feet. The fans in the front row have already gotten up out of their seats and have taken several steps back as Graystone approaches, grabs Black and proceeds to lift him up and drop him throat first across the top of the steel ring barrier.
Black falls to the ground, gasping for air, as he holds his throat and writhes in pain.
Graystone reaches over the ring barrier and grabs an empty chair and wipes some blood off his face and proceeds to draw a bloody “X” on the chair and motions for Black to get up.
Black is on all fours trying to capture his breath and after a few moments he rolls over and sits down and looks up just in time to see an X made with his own blood coming right at him…
Graystone drives the steel chair straight down on the top of the LSD Champions head and Black just falls limply to the ground as Graystone looks at the newly dented chair with a smile.
He then picks up Black, who is pretty much dead weight at this point, and rolls him into the ring and as the crowd boos loudly he rolls in and makes a cover as Hortega goes to start the count..
…Suddenly, the screen of the HOV spontaneously illuminates to, drawing the every eye in the Best Arena towards it, including those currently in the ring and the announcers. The footage being show is of a well-kept grass-covered landscape, with a tall tree looming in the northern horizon and seemingly stretching for miles in every other direction rows upon rows of tombstones.
The camera begins to turn in a counter-clockwise circle on the spot, bringing each of the graves, old and
new, into momentary view, stopping on none of them long enough to note any specific details….
…until it is suddenly back in the same position it started from and a figure of a man can now be seen beneath the darkening sky. Hunched over a grave with his back to the camera, the man tirelessly tends to the area in front of a grave: checking the flowers and delicately keeping the grass trimmed neatly with some secateurs.
Man: La de da da….dum dum, dum dum….
He mutters musically to himself as he continues his work for a few more moments and then slowly pushes himself up from his hands, so he is now balanced on his knees and surveying his work.
Man: All done! What do you think?
He asks, obviously to the camera given that nobody else seems anywhere in view. As if to confirm this, he turns his head sharply and stares towards it – dark-colored eyes glaring out from beneath a blank and expressionless porcelain mask.
Benny Newell: What the fuck is that?
Benny exclaims, caught somewhat off-guard by the abrupt sight of the mask and the sense of creepiness it is designed to exude. The question generally on the minds of everybody watching, however, is more ‘who the fuck is that?’
And they get their answer almost immediately.
The man yells towards the camera, probing further, as he reaches up and moves the mask so it is on the top of his head rather than over his face, revealing himself as Shane Reynolds. His disheveled and still unwashed hair sticks crazily out from beneath the mask and his face is adorned with at least three to four days stubble and a look of even deeper madness.
Shane Reynolds: Do you, Graystone? After all, this is where your legacy last year ended up…..although you may not realize that.
He grins a toothy and wholly sinister grin.
Shane Reynolds: You see, a lot has happened since you buried me alive all those months ago. The girl you turned against me and whose innocence you twisted and destroyed…well, she had no option but to leave this mortal coil….and with her went the last piece of what was my family and the last of whatever goodness burned within me.
Shane pauses a moment, and his face adopts a fleeting look of nostalgia and recollection, before he blinks and refocuses his thoughts back on the present.
Shane Reynolds: The moment you and her began shoveling dirt upon me was a defining one. Everything I have done since then, and everything that has happened to me, was all because of that moment. And I didn’t do all of that or go through all of that just to let you wander back in here and strut about in one piece, to rob me of my destiny of being the one to finally end Maximillian Kael, and desecrate the championship I made into something worthwhile and meaningful….
The grin leaves Shane’s face, becoming deeply solemn as he stands back to his feet, although not removing his unblinking focus from the camera.
Shane Reynolds: Michelle may have gone to a better place, but I remain here and for as long as I am, her voice will forever speak to me and through everything – my match with Max, my constant battles with Paul Paras, and my perpetual goal to prove once and for all my dominance over Aceldama – she has not let me forget you. She has not let me forgive you. So, Graystone….you look upon this place now…..and you bear witness to your sins…
Shane takes a step towards the camera, his hand slowly reaching up towards the mask again. Behind him, the tombstone comes more into view. Upon it is written the name Jeanette Townsend…..but it has been crossed through, as has the date of birth and death. Above it, carved into the marble, is another name: Michelle Reynolds-Creedy.
Shane Reynolds: …because I have waited a long time to exact judgment upon you for them, and I’m not going to wait one….second….longer…
The mask comes down once again over Shane’s again grinning face as he speaks these words and disappears out of sight, beyond the view of the camera and the HOV goes dark…
Joe Hoffman: Graystone surely just had this match won but….wow..Shane Reynolds…..BLACK WITH A ROLL UP!!
Graystone, who was on his feet watching the end of the video, never seen Black crawling up behind him and rolling him up….
Graystone kicks out at the last possible second and the crowd gasps at the near fall as Graystone jumps up to his feet quickly and smokes Black with a right hand that sends the LSD Champion reeling once again as Graystone sneaks another peek towards the HOV and the backstage area.
The ICON Champion walks towards the ropes and exits the ring and stops and looks back at Black who is pulling himself up with the help of the ropes, and then back up the entrance ramp and decides to walk towards the latter.
Joe Hoffman: Graystone is just leaving?? You know Shane Reynolds isn’t here as he is a Mayhem guy but if Graystone truly doesn’t care about the……OH MY GOD!!!!
With god knows what energy, David Black just ran and literally dove over the top rope and nailed Graystone from behind with a suicide dive.
The crowd trumps Joe’s Oh my God call with a HOLY SHIT Chant as both Champions are once again laid out.
Joe Hoffman: I have NO CLUE how David Black found the energy to do that but the will to win is obviously driving this man….it is no wonder how he has held the LSD Championship for 129 days now..
Benny Newell: Huh..what I miss? Did you see these topless pics of our new backstage interviewer??
Joe looks at Benny incredulously as he continues to call the match…
Both Champions are literally pulling themselves up by using the other for leverage. After a few moments both men are up and the seemingly beat up men erupt with a fury of punches as each man swings blindly time and time again with right hands as the two champions turn into a blur of violence.
Surprisingly Black gains the upper hand and drives Graystone back to the ring and we see that Graystone’s face is now covered in his own blood, which is mixing with the dried blood of David Black that is still covering most of the face of the ICON Champion.
Now it is Black who rolls Graystone into the ring and he follows suit and picks up the ICON Champion and whips him hard into the ropes and as Graystone comes off Black meets him with drop toe hold right into an elbow onto the back of the head of the ICON Champion…..and then another elbow and then another.
Black is on his knees looking down at Graystone who is now on his back holding the back of his head in agony as Black crawls towards the ropes and slides out of the ring and reaches underneath the ring and pulls out a ladder.
The crowd “oohs” and “aahs” as the LSD Champion slides the ladder into the ring and rolls in right after it and sets it up in the corner and as he turns he is met by a stalking Graystone…
Joe Hoffman: THE BLACK OUT!!!?? GRAYSTONE JUST NAILED DAVID BLACK WITH HIS OWN FINISHER!!
Graystone falls on the LSD Champion and Hortega makes the count…
Hortega signals for the bell as Graystone rolls off of the Champion and quickly out of the ring.
Bryan McVay: WINNER OF THE BOUT IN 18 MINUTES AND 46 SECONDS AND STILL ICON CHAMPION…GRAAAAAYSTONE!!!!
Hortega goes to give Graystone the title and he snatches it away from Hortega and promptly nails the referee with it and Hortega goes down hard to the canvas.
The crowd is booing loudly and giving it to Graystone at his total lack of respect for anyone and everyone.
Joe Hoffman: he defeated the man with the man’s own finisher…a simple but effective way of showing no respect at all for his fellow peers here in HOW..
Suddenly a fan jumps the railing and smokes Graystone from behind….with a shovel???
Benny Newell: WHAT THE FUCK??!!!
The hooded fan quickly pulls back the hood on his sweatshirt and we see that its Shane Reynolds!!
The crowd cheers madly at the sight of Reynolds, and namely anyone, taking Graystone out.
Reynolds raises the shovel again and brings it down across the back of Graystone, breaking it into two.
Graystone screams out in agony as Shane Reynolds bends down and picks up the ICON Championship and holds it up high towards the fans in an ultimate show of respect for what the title means to them and to himself.
“HOLD THE MOTHERFUCKING PHONE!!”
Suddenly Lee Best appears from the back and he is livid.
Lee Best: WHO IN THE ROYAL FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE ……THIS ISNT FUCKING MAYHEM AND THIS SURE AS FUCK ISNT A FORUM FOR YOU TO SHOWCASE YOUR EMO SKILLS…THIS IS FUCKING MY SHOW!!!
Lee begins power walking towards the ring and pauses and looks back and stops when he sees no one is following him..
Lee Best: GET THE FUCK OUT HERE EPU….NOW!!!
The camera turns towards Shane Reynolds who is smiling. He literally steps over Graystone and starts walking towards Lee Best as Lee is focused on the backstage area..
Lee Best: GET THE FUCK OUT THERE NOW MOTHERFUCKERS!!!
Still no EPU…but now Shane is literally standing right behind Lee and as he turns around he is standing nose to nose with Shane and Lee falls backwards in fright and falls right on his ass.
The crowd laughs as Shane bends down and looks Lee directly in the eyes and mouths the word “ICONIC”.
Lee’s fright turns to a smile as dollar signs come into focus in his eyes..
Lee Best: You sick fuck…you want Graystone? You fucking got it….Graystone vs. Shane Reynolds…IN A FUCKING BURIED ALIVE REMATCH!!!
Shane just smiles at Lee and motions for him to continue…
Lee Best: What you think your ass deserves a fucking title shot? C’mon…you lost to Triple P fucking 12 times in the last two months..you don’t deserve shit……WHERE THE FUCK IS MY EPU!!!
Again Shane just smiles and then lifts a finger and points behind Lee…
The crowd erupts into cheers as Lee spins around and looks up to see Mike Best standing at the top of the ramp surrounded by the EPU.
Lee Best: TAKE THAT MOTHERFUCKER OUT!!!
Mike Best: You heard him….
Mike Best simply smiles as the EPU charge down the ramp towards Lee Best who realizes what is going on and starts crawling towards the ring. Shane steps to the side as the EPU agents catch up to Lee and literally lift him up in the air and begin carrying him back up the entrance ramp as the crowd is cheering madly.
Mike Best: Brother it didn’t have to be like this…..after tonight you will no longer see any EPU agents as their last act is carrying you out of here….FOREVER!!
Lee is screaming at the top of his lungs as the EPU agents carry him up the ramp and they disappear to the back leaving Mike Best at the top of the entrance ramp…
He then turns towards Shane Reynolds…
Mike Best: Your mach with Graystone WILL BE for the ICON Title at ICONIC!!!
With that Mike turns and heads to the back to the loudest ovation ever heard in The Best Arena and we got a final image of Shane Reynolds smiling while a brooding Graystone can be seen in the background.
END OF TRANSMISSION
BURIED ALIVE REMATCH
Shane Reynolds vs. Graystone©
MSG BOILER ROOM BRAWL
HOFC Tournament Winner vs. Michael DeNucci©
The Best Arena