Turmoil: May 14th, 2009 (2009)

Weekly Show | 120 Min
Rating:
6/10
6

Show Transcript

Thursday Night Turmoil
May 14th, 2009 – #HOW51
The Best Arena, Chicago IL

 

Bridge to…

The HOTv logo gives way to the TNT Banner and logo as Turmoil begins airing live once again.

Turmoil begins as a video begins to play on the High Octane Vision screen for all the fans inside The Best Arena and live to all the viewers watching on the High Octane Television Network.

The Following pre-recorded Segment is Sponsored by 1-800-Max-Kael

HOW Camera’s arrive at the scene of a bridge. Mario and his son Joseph are seen leaning up against the side of the bridge with Joey nowhere in sight. As the camera’s get closer Triple M’s face becomes more visible and Mario smiles.

Mario Maurako: Welcome Crow… does this scene look familiar? Because it should! The last time we were on this bridge Crow you had my wife dangling from a rope over the side.

Joseph Maurako: Just like we have Joey right now.

The camera man moves toward the side of the bridge and looks down and sees Joey hanging from the bridge by a rope. Joey looks up at the camera man with a look of panic on his face, Joey is unable to scream or anything as Triple M still has Joey’s mouth covered with duct tape.

Mario Maurako: You see Crow it was here that you decided to try to be a hero and rescue my wife. And now Crow you’re about to find out why it’s not always a good idea to be a Hero, because you never know when some lunatic will come along with a sadistic choice. Let your cousin die… or hand over the HOW World Championship? Make your choice, Crow, and see how a hero is rewarded!

Joseph Maurako: Umm Dad?

Mario Maurako: What Joseph? Can’t you see I’m a little busy.

Joseph Maurako: Yes but umm… you do realize that Crow isn’t here right?

Mario Maurako: Oh yeah… sorry. I was watching Spiderman yesterday and just got carried away I guess.

Joseph Maurako: It’s ok that was an awesome movie.

Mario Maurako: Well I guess you can help me pull this old bag of bones up now.

Joseph and Mario begin to pull on the rope raising Joey from his dangling spot over the side of the bridge.

Mario Maurako: On second thought let’s just drop him.

Mario lets go of the rope and Joey begins to plummet as the rope slips through Joseph’s hands no doubt burning him.

Joseph Maurako: DAD! This isn’t part of the plan!

Mario grabs the rope and begins to pull Joey up again.

Mario Maurako: Don’t worry Joseph I wasn’t going to really drop him. I just wanted Crow to think about what life would be like if I did. You know a family member of his that has been with him for so many years could have been taken from him within a few minutes.

The Maurako’s pull Joey up from over the side of the bridge and Mario pats him on the back.

Mario Maurako: I promise I wasn’t going to drop you little buddy.

Joseph Maurako: Yeah because then we wouldn’t be able to do the things that we planned to do.

Mario Maurako: Exactly… Joseph… get the Rods!

Joseph Maurako walks away and returns with three fishing rods.

Mario Maurako: Joey my dear friend…. I’ve decided that we’re going to take you fishing!

Joseph Maurako: We called 1-800-Max-Kael and he helped us through these difficult times!

Joey stares at the two of them before he reach out toward the rod. With a smile Triple M nods sympathetically.

Mario Maurako: My enemies poor, abused cousin is my new.. cousin. In time, you’ll be speaking in Awesome and learning how to live a life free of boorish, droning and tiresome “good guy” activity involving the death of other men’s wives.. instead you’ll learn how to be Awesome, how to be better then the average man and how to get women to make you an Awesomely Epic Sammich.. without having to share.

Mario winked at Joey who just stared up at Mario with a confused face, the duct tape still on his face. Joey reached up to tear the tape away only to get stopped by Mario.

Mario Maurako: Wait, wait.. we probably should just leave that on there, I’ve honestly never actually heard you speak and.. well.. I already have one nagging voice to deal with.

Ticks his head toward Joey who is fascinated currently with the fishing poles.

Mario Maurako: Anyway.. lets head down to the water and catch us some Carp! I might even fish up a new wife, who knows! It’s a bright new day.. for Mario Maurako and Family.

The segment closes with Triple M, Joseph and Joey walking toward the end of the bridge as soft, family friendly music plays in the back ground as the video ends and we cut live inside The Best Arena where Lee Best is standing inside the middle of the ring!

 

Simply the Best

The cameras zoom into Lee Best as the co owner of HOW raises the microphone to his lips and begins to speak as the crowd is buzzing at the start of Turmoil already as they know Lee opening up the show means business.

Joe Hoffman quickly welcomes the HOTv viewing audience to another Turmoil as Benny tells him to shut up as Lee is set to begin his address!

Lee Best: Welcome to High Octane Wrestling’s Thursday Night Turmoil. I am the co owner of the company, Lee Best, and I am FUCKING PISSED OFF!!!

Lee looks out into the crowd with a crazed look in his eye as the crowd actually gives Lee a cheer as everyone knows a pissed off Lee is pure entertainment.

Lee Best: Lets go thru this past week shall we? HOW finishes last in the ratings on the network I FUCKING CREATED AND MAK KAEL BLAMES ME FOR THE FUCKING BOOKING?

Lee stretches his neck as the strain on his face is all too noticeable.

Lee Best: You think the matches that were booked were the problem? If that is the case then its clear to why everyone in the fucking back KNOWS that the only way this company will survive and thrive is if I am at the helm. I can book the greatest matches all day and night but if the WRESTLERS in the match don’t put in 100% then the match will turn viewers off and thus…KILL OUR RATINGS. IT IS NOT MY FAULT THE RATINGS ARE LOW IT’S THE FUCKING ASSHOLES THAT REFUSE TO COMMITT TO MAKING HOW THE BEST WRESTLING COMPANY IN THE LAND!!

Lee lowers the mic as he begins to pace back and forth as he is really getting worked up.

Lee Best: Then you know what really boggles my fucking mind? Max claims I am the reason for the low ratings and what does he do? HE BOOKS FUCKING BOB JARED IN A TITLE MATCH AT THE BIGGEST EVEN IN HOW’S HISTORY!!! WHAT THE ROYAL FUCK????

Lee looks out at the crowd incredulously as a Bob Jared chant starts up..

JAAAAARED…….JAAAAARED……JAAAAARED…..

Finally even Lee Best has to smile..albeit a brief one…at just how popular the Tennessee Tumbleweed has become.

Lee Best: You like good old Bob huh? You think that he can help bring the ratings up in HOW? I don’t think so and neither did this man…roll the fucking footage…

Lee turns towards the HOV, along with the rest of the arena as a video begins to play.

The footage opens up where we see Bob Jared lying face down on the ground out cold. As the camera pans back we see Christopher America standing over Bob Jared with his red, white, and blue steel chair in hand.

Christopher is smiling at the sight of the motionless Bob Jared. Christopher gets down on his knees. He speaks into Bob Jared’s ear.

Christopher: The first step on the road to my recovery was to make right with myself. I did that. The next step on the road to recovery? Taking out the man who humiliated me last week. But, I guess you found that out without me telling you, huh?

I sure hope this doesn’t affect your title match at War Games. I’d hate to see you not compete for the title that I made famous.

See ya around, Bob.

Christopher gets up and walks away as voices of EMTs can be heard echoing in the hallway, coming towards Jared’s direction as the video ends.

The HOV goes black once again as Lee turns back towards the hard camera as the crowd begins booing.

Lee Best: And that is why America is on Team Best at War Games. He knows what he wants and he knows what is good for business. I AM GOOD FOR BUSINESS…NOT MAXIMILLIAN FAIL.

The crowd begins booing louder as Lee continues..

Lee Best: Maximillian Fail is a failure and although some of you assholes in the back like to think you are special cause you have his ear daily, I am here to tell you that no matter what you are saying to Mr. Fail daily behind my back it doesn’t pertain to your career….HERE…IN THE FUCKING RING!!

Lee drops down to a knee and pounds the mat and remains on one knee as he continues..

Lee Best: It is here in the fucking ring where you make your damn mark here in HOW…not by backstage politicking and not by kissing the ass and becoming buddy buddy with the staff. IN THIS FUCKING RING IS WHERE YOUR CAREER WILL DIE OR THRIVE…..RIGHT FUCKING HERE….

Lee drops down to both knees and pounds the mat repeatedly as he has become engrossed in the moment.

Lee Best: I AM DONE DEALING WITH THOSE JUST WILLING TO SKATE BY…I WANT MOTHERFUCKERS THAT WANT TO BE THE BEST…I WANT GUYS THAT WANT TO BE REMEMERED FOR THE THINGS THEY DID IN THE RING AND NOT BY THE SHIT THEY DID OUT OF THE RING….I WANT WRESTLERS……

Lee pauses as he stands up and stares the most evil look he has ever had into the hard camera as he finishes his sentence…

Lee Best: …….not friends.

With that Lee drops the microphone and as Undead blasts thru the PA system inside The Best Arena, Joe takes Turmoil to its first commercial break as once again Lee has left the arena buzzing.

 


Free of the KL247 Virus!!

 

Bobbinette Queen B Carey vs. Christopher America
Singles Match

We’re back from commercial and “Remember the Name” by Fort Minor is playing which elicits a “JA-BBER… JA-BBER… JA-BBER” chant from the hostile Best Arena crowd waiting eagerly for the action to begin. Christopher America emerges from the back to some serious heat and just snickers at the crowd as he confidently struts his way to the ring.

Benny Newell: You know, Joe… you have to admire a guy like Christopher America. He didn’t make a single excuse for his embarrassing… and downright pathetic loss to Bob Jared last week and showed just how pathetic Jared is when he laid him out in that video Lee aired.

Joe Hoffman: No one deserves to be attacked from behind but other than that fact I have to agree with you there Benny. America seems to have put the past behind him and looks extremely focused tonight; but one has to wonder just how he will defeat a streaking Bobbinette Carey who hasn’t lost in over a month.

Benny Newell: Streaking Carey? Cmon I would smell bacon if that was going on..

Joe can only shake his head as the action cuts to the ring.

Christopher America climbs in the ring and salutes the American flag that is waving on the HOV screen until “Circus” by Britney Spears hits and the crowd rises to their feet for the Queen of Epicness, Bobbinette Carey. She poses at the top of the entrance ramp and gives a jovial smirk before slapping some hands around ringside and sliding under the bottom rope.

Joel Hortega calls for the bell and Christopher America charges wildly at Carey who spins around him with a waist lock. America with a standing switch though and sends Carey to the mat face first with an American forearm to the back of her head. Carey writhes, holding her head as America follows through with an American Elbow drop to the same spot.

America covers for what is barely a near fall and is right back on the attack with an American side-headlock. Carey pushes off, America ducks while Carey leaps over him… she bounces off the ropes and WOW! Somersault Clothesline has America stunned! Carey covers but nets a 2 count as America gets the shoulder up. Bobbinette executes a Standing Leg Drop across the neck and keeps America down on the mat by working his right leg, jumping high and driving her knee into his.

Both superstars make it back to their feet and Carey nails punches to the forehead of Christopher America but America denies her the momentum with an American Standing Drop Kick. Chris pops to his feet and sends Bobbinette flying into the turnbuckle. She snaps off violently and America with the cover…

UNO…

DOS…

NEAR FALL!!!

Joe Hoffman: Christopher America showing early aggression here in this match-up between members from Team Best and Team Kael at War Games.

Benny Newell: You mean, Team Best showing why they will ultimately prevail at War Games? Shit, why Lee lets you have a job is beyond me!

Joe Hoffman: I suppose I could say the same about you, Mr. I’m-Lee’s-Drinking-Buddy…

Back in the ring, Christopher America is really taking it to Bobbinette Carey and almost gets another pin fall after an American Swinging Neckbreaker. He pounds his fist onto the mat in frustration, most likely because he doesn’t want a reoccurrence of what happened with Bob Jared. America calls for the FOR AMERICA cutter finisher but Bobbinette Carey is able to slip away before impact. She sends Christopher America over the top rope to the outside and upon standing to his feet, she baseball slides into him, sending him into the steel barricade.

Christopher America clutches his back in pain but Carey continues with the attack, leaping onto America’s shoulders and delivering a picture perfect hurracanrana. Both need a few moments to recover before Bobbinette sends America back into the ring and follows him.

Upon entering the ring again, Carey is met with a knee to the mid-section and before she knows it, has been dropped with an American DDT. Christopher America covers right away pulling her tights for leverage…

UNO…

DOS…

JUUUUUUUUST KICKED OUT!

Joe Hoffman: How did she kick out of that?!?! Bobbinette Carey is one of the toughest women this business has ever seen!

Benny Newell: And one of the most selfish… I’ll never forget the day she chose herself as World Champion over Shane Reynolds after he technically won War Games last year. Max Kael’s an idiot if he thinks she’s going to help his team!

Back to her feet, Bobbinette Carey and Christopher America trade blows back and forth until Carey’s Knife-edge Chops leave a blistering red mark on America’s chest. Despite the stinging, America seems proud of his work as well as Carey nurses her breast from the swelling of his own American Chops. An American Belly-to-Belly Suplex gets blocked though and Carey counters by lifting up her much larger opponents into an Inverted Suplex and dropping him on the mat with a Brainbuster. Hortega drops for the count…

UNO…

DOS…

TRESSSSS!!!!!!!!!

Hortega calls for the bell but immediately waves it off as he sees Christopher America’s leg on the bottom rope!

Benny Newell: What’s going on here? Please don’t tell me that bitch won?!?

Referee Joel Hortega signals for the match to continue but Christopher America got enough American recovery time to regain the advantage with some offensive strikes on the former World Champion of HOW. An American Spinebuster has Bobbinette rolling in agony on the mat, but Christopher’s FOR AMERICA! finisher once again get’s blocked and countered into a Crucifix pin by Bobbinette Carey. America kicks out after 2 though and both superstars rise back to their feet and share an intense stare down in the center of the ring which draws some applause from the crowd.

Christopher America signals to Carey that he wants to lock up, but just as Carey leans forward to lock arms with America, he kicks her in the gut with his American Boot. Carey tumbles over and Christopher sees this as a perfect opportunity for an American Power Bomb! He lifts her into the air, but Carey manages to swing her body weight forwards into a Tornado DDT!

Bobbinette covers AGAIN…

1…

2…

NOOOOOOOO!

Joe Hoffman: How in the hell did he kick out of that? Great resiliency from the young American who clearly has no intention losing this match!

But neither does Bobbinette Carey who is right back following up on the pin with a SUPERKICK attempt that America is lucky enough to avoid by catching her foot and spinning her around. As she comes back full circle, America catches her in the FOR AMERICA finisher only to stumble as she breaks free again. Bobbinette springs off the ropes and lands the SUPERKICK right to America’s jaw, sending him backwards down to the mat! Carey collapses on top of him and hooks the leg as her legions of fans count along with Joel Hortega.

UNO…

DOS…

TRES!!!!!!!!

THE WINNER OF THIS MATCH IN 12:49… BOBBINETTE CAREY!!!

The crowd erupts as Joel Hortega raises the weakened arm of Bobbinette Carey. With Carey and Christopher America exhilarated in the ring, Joe and Benny discuss how close the match was when out of the corner of his eye, Christopher America catches the glimpse of an unknown man in the crowd before he disappears. This only seems to upset America even further while Joe and Benny debate who the person could be before cutting to the backstage area.

 

Xtreme Arrivial

The action cuts backstage where the screeching of tires as a black car screeches into the parking lot of the Best Arena can be heard. It stops mere inches from the wall, from the shadows of which steps Maximillian Kael. Staring at the car for a moment, he wipes a mock sweat from his brow as though relieved, taps on the hood and moves around to the side.

Max: It’s about time you got here. You’re late!

Max says as the back passenger door flies open and Shane Reynolds steps out, greeting Max in return with a vicious stare.

Shane: You told me you didn’t want me at this show. Not to come.

Max strokes his chin contemplatively.

Max: Did I?

Shane: Yes!

Shane scowls, every fiber of his being wanting to leap forward and throttling Max, but somehow able to restrain himself.

Shane: And then out of nowhere, I get dragged outside and put in a car and driven all the way here.

Shane then pauses, and pulled a sheet of paper from his pocket – a copy of a recent news story which had been left on the back seat beside the one he had sat on for the car journey. The one concerning the stipulations for the match against Aceldama.

Shane: And what is this all about?

Max snatches it away, only to glance at it momentarily before screwing it into a ball and tossing it over a shoulder.

Max: Oh, that’s nothing. Forget that. The important this is wow…I really don’t remember saying any of that to you. You must be hearing voices down in that basement. You finding it to your liking, by the way?

Shane doesn’t answer…..a reaction that sparks one of Max’s own – his lips to pull back from his teeth in his trademark sneer….which grows wider still the angrier Shane seems to get.

Max: It doesn’t matter anymore—

Max begins, tapping Shane on the shoulder in a jovial way, which just pisses Shane off more.

Max:—you’re here now. So hurry up – there’s work to be done!!

Shane: What?

Max: No need to trouble yourself yet….I think it’ll be something you’ll enjoy!

Max says, not elaborating, as he turns, snapping his fingers as though at a slow butler, and walks off. The visions of crushing Max’s skull comes flooding back…..but represses it again, ready to save it for another time, slowly following after Max as Turmoil cuts to commercial.

 


Official Beer of those without Swine Flu

 

Mark O’Neal vs. A Pimp Called Rufus
Singles Match

Joe Hoffman: Welcome back ladies and gentlemen! So Benny, what do you say? Should we get right to our next match?

Benny Newell: Yeah, the quicker we get this over with the better. I gotta’ get with Rufus ASAP about something after the show!

Joe Hoffman: What for in particular?

Benny Newell: Don’t worry about it, Joe. It’s something that virgins like you wouldn’t understand.

While Joe tries to argue the fact that he’s not a virgin, PIMP MUSIC hits the speakers and the crowd isn’t really sure what to think of the appearance of A Pimp Called Rufus, who makes his way out from the back with his pimp cane and some Hos at his side. The obscenities that he’s undoubtedly shouting at a few females sitting along ringside can barely be heard as the PIMP MUSIC is piercing loudly throughout the arena. As he walks past Benny at the announcer’s booth, he gives him the thumbs-up sign and a wink while Benny’s jaw drops as the Hos Rufus is proudly flaunting in front of him.

Joe Hoffman: Focus Benny! There IS a match about to start here.

Joe quickly reviews Rufus’ wrestling credentials noting that he’s done some training with La Parka and Mongo Michael in the past but isn’t too experienced in the ring. At least not as experienced as HOW Hall of Famer Mark O’Neal, who’s music hits next. He emerges from the back to a mixed reaction from the Best Arena crowd, some cheers from the die-hard fans of many years, but mostly boos from the newer breed of fans who are aware of his association with Lee Best.

Benny Newell: Sorry Joe… did you see the way that Ho was looking at me?!? It’s like she was fucking me with her eyes! HAHA!

Joe Hoffman: Benny!

Benny Newell: Sorry… right. Mark O’Neal… Lee Best’s Special Enforcer for the War Games match. I gather he’ll take care of Rufus in about 2 minutes tops.

Right on cue, Matt Boettcher signals for the bell after Mark O’Neal steps into the ring and we’re under way with Rufus yielding his Pimp Cane at O’Neal. Luckily, Boettcher grabs the cane in mid-swing and tries to explain to Rufus that using it as a weapon is illegal. Rufus is having none of it though, refusing to believe that using his cane is illegal and that it’s FAR from some of the illegal shit he’s done in the past. Amidst the argument, Mark O’Neal takes advantage of the opportunity and drops A Pimp Called Rufus from behind with an Inverted Face Plant! O’Neal covers early…

1…

2…

KICKOUT BY RUFUS JACKSON!!

Back to their feet, Rufus holds the back of his head from the impact and starts shouting something at Mark O’Neal as he looks at Rufus in confusion.

A Pimp Called Rufus: What was that for, BITCH?!?

THWACK!!!

A Pimp Called Rufus: PIMP SMACK YO DUMB ASS!

Mark O’Neal holds his jaw from the backhand he just received from Rufus Jackson and is done messing around. O’Neal swiftly kicks Rufus in the gut, doubling him over and then drops him head-first with an Impact DDT. O’Neal hooks the leg for another cover rolls him too far and Rufus rolls through with a pin attempt of his own!

1…

2…

Joe Hoffman: Rufus almost stole one there from Mark O’Neal!

Rufus carefully brings Rufus to his feet after an elbow to the spine and out of nowhere, hits the Reverse Neckbreaker! This is about as technical as Rufus gets though and it’s not long before the savvy and experienced Mark O’Neal, despite not competing for quite a while, gains the upper hand. O’Neal lifts the 195 pounds Rufus Jackson into the air for an Inverted Suplex…holds him there… holds him there… until all of Rufus’ blood rushes to his head… then BAM! Drops him into the cover.

1…

2…

3…

Benny Newell: Is it over?!?

Joe Hoffman: No! Rufus got his leg on the rope… thanks to one of his Hos!

Boettcher completely misses the Ho in the act of cheating and waves off the pin, only seeing Rufus’ leg on the rope. Mark O’Neal gets in the face of Boettcher and tells him to ‘wake the fuck up’ because he should’ve won the match within minutes.

While O’Neal and Boettcher are arguing, a different Ho hops up on the apron and distracts them with her “assets” while the same Ho that helped Rufus hands him the Pimp Cane. The Ho on the apron reaches across the top rope and kisses Boettcher on the lips while…

CRACK!!!

Joe Hoffman: Rufus just nailed Mark O’Neal with the Pimp Cane!

Benny Newell: Oh no! Get up Mark!!

Rufus smacks his lips and fixes the collar to his Pimp Suit, satisfied with his efforts so far against the HOW Hall of Famer. Mark O’Neal is laid out face first on the mat and Rufus calls off the Ho from Matt Boettcher so he can make the count.

1…

2…

Joe Hoffman: KICKOUT! OH MY! HOW DID MARK O’NEAL KICK OUT?!?

Benny is speechless and Rufus can’t believe it either, deciding it’s time to end the match once and for all with the GOTCHA BITCH Diamond Cutter finisher. He sizes up Mark O’Neal, who is still slow to his feet from the Pimp Cane shot and Mark ducks under the shot, nails Rufus in the gut and nails him with his Time Bomb powerbomb-like move.

Benny Newell: FINALLY…..I think that shot woke the Hall of Famer up!!

A surpringly gassed O’Neal looks down at Rufus and stumbles over to the corner and climbs to the top rope and jumps off and the cameras flash all around The Best Arena as Mark nails his Explosive Drop top rope splash finisher.

Joe Hoffman: The Hall of Famer was just too much in the end…Boettcher with the count…

1……………

2…………..

3!!!!!!!!!!!

WINNER OF THE MATCH IN 7:42 MARK O’NEAL!!!

Mark sits up and smiles and wipes sweat from his forehead as he cracks a small and signals to the crowd that he was just rusty.

Mark then exits the ring and says something to the HO’s who were waiting to get in the ring and check on their pimp. After a few seconds they start smiling and grab Mark by the arms and the former Mercenary tag team partner and brother of Shocker, makes his way back to the back with Rufus’s Ho’s at his side.

The action cuts to the backstage area as Benny puts over Mark’s experience as the determining factor in this match.

 

Best Night Ever

The action opens up inside the office of Lee Best who is standing and clapping as Shocker walks in..

Shocker: You see that shit?

Lee doesn’t take his eyes off the screen as he answers Shocker..

Lee Best: Ya man it was awesome. I cant believe he nailed that…I mean that was a tough out.

Shocker looks puzzled at Lee’s reply and he walks over and see’s that Lee is actually watching the Yankees taking on the Blue Jays and not the live feed of Turmoil.

Shocker: You telling me that you just missed the in ring return of O’Neal.

Lee Best: Huh? Oh…..ya fuck it. I figured if I blinked I would miss it. Besides I got money on this and thank god Matsui just went fucking deep.

Shocker walks up and hits the power button and shuts off the TV which causes Lee to turn towards Shocker quickly..

Lee Best: Who the fuck you…

Shocker gives Lee a look and Lee realizes he was about to fight a losing battle and instead he walks over to the other side of his desk and takes a seat in his plush leather chair and motions for Shocker to sit but the former ICON Champion refuses.

Lee Best: Suit yourself…..so whats up….Mark won I hope?

Shocker: Of course. There was the rust factor but in the end he made Rufus his bitch and then left with the whores.

Lee Best: Niiiiiiiice.

Shocker: But that’s not why I am here right now. Lee we gotta talk about what is going on right now in HOW. Your commissioner was in a political scandal, the HOWrestling.com site is getting fewer and fewer hits each and every day and to top it off…..where the fuck is Jatt Starr?

Lee lets out a long sigh and leans forward as he prepares to answer Shockers questions.

Lee Best: First off that shit with Scottywood was handled and he was fired as Commissioner and later tonight he will be leaving the company in shame. Second of all the reason the fucking website is down in hits is because of Maximillian Fail and his laziness as a Co owner. He is keeping several wrestlers from participating in online news, interviews and thus keeping fresh content from being on the site and THUS KEEPING FUCKERS FROM COMING TO THE SITE AND CHECKING IN ON THE FUCKING FED…..

Shocker: Oooook. So where the hell is Starr? Do I need to make a few calls?

Lee Best: Do not worry about Jatt Starr. He has some family issues he needs to take care of and….well you could take his wife and…..ah never mind…..Jatt will be fine. And if he is not I already know who Ill replace him with at War Games…

Just as Lee is about to announce his backup plan the door to his office opens and in walks Mark O’Neal and the HO’s he stole from Rufus.

Lee Best: …..MARK O’NEAL!! Great fucking match man. I watched the whole thing and let me tell you what …you never looked better….well maybe not as good as you look know surrounded by AIDS and whatever other STD’s are with ya….BUT WELCOME BACK!!

Mark O’Neal: Ya ya ya Lee. I was in here with you earlier when you bet five stacks on the Yanks…did they win?

Lee gives Shocker a look before answering The Explosive One.

Lee Best: Lets not worry about that…its time to fucking celebrate!

Lee steps behind his desk and opens up a drawer and pulls out a few Cuban cigars and hands them to Shocker and Mark and smiles.

Lee Best: God its good to see The Mercenaries back here in HOW…..cmon boys…lets celebrate and watch two AoA members beat the royal piss out of each other…

Mark and Shocker light up their cigars and they head towards the couch, whores included, and one of them takes a seat on the top of Lee’s desk.

Lee Best: Sorry honey but if you don’t get that venus fly trap of yours off my fucking desk this second I will be forced to stab you in the fucking eye and then allow Mark to skull fuck the STD’s out of you…..

The whore looks at Lee and scoffs as she stands up and walks over and sits on Mark’s lap as Lee turns on the TV again just in time to see the Yankees win…

Lee Best: YES!! Tonight is going to be a good fucking night…

Turmoil goes to Commercial as part of the Best Alliance celebrates the in ring victorious return of Mark O’Neal.

 


HOW is officially the lowest rated company in HOTv.

 

Marvelous Mario Maurako vs. John Sektor
Singles Match

John Sektor is already in the ring when “Ego” By Element Eighty hits and Marvelous Mario Maurako makes his way out from the back. Maurako climbs into the ring and stands face to face with Sektor in the middle of the ring.

Suddenly “Circus” By Brittney Spears hits and Bobbinette Carey walks down to the ring but doesn’t stand in a corner, but rather right dead center along the ring apron. Mario and Sektor begin to squabble over who Carey is there for. The Superstars shove each other as Referee Joel Hortega signals for the bell.

Joe Hoffman: These two have been at each others throats as of late despite being members of the same stable.

Benny Newell: This could spell the end of the AoA and I love it!

Sektor turns to Carey as if to ask her about whose corner she is in when he is met with a forearm to the back of the head by Triple M. Sektor gets up to a knee and Triple M nails him with a DDT. Mario picks Sektor up off of the canvas and hoists him into the air and lands the Gorilla Press Slam and then blows Carey a kiss.

Benny Newell: And there goes Triple M again attempting to steal Sektor’s whore.

Joe Hoffman: Stop it Benny! Carey is not a whore and she doesn’t belong to Sektor or Triple M.

Benny Newell: Then what in the hell is she doing out here?

Joe Hoffman: Perhaps she’s developed a friendship with them.

Benny Newell: With benefits.

Sektor gets up and shoves Maurako and then swings at him with a wild right hand that Triple M ducks, Mario then hooks Sektor up in a full nelson and hits the Full Nelson Slam (Super Mario). Sektor gets up and Mario hooks him up for a stalling suplex which he holds for at least 15 seconds before dropping Sektor hard on the mat. Mario quickly sits up and looks at Sektor who is struggling to get up from the ground. Mario sneaks up behind Sektor and clamps on Marvelousity! And it isn’t long before Sektor has passed out and referee Joel Hortega calls for the bell again.

THE WINNER OF THE MATCH IN 0:58 BY REFEREE STOPPAGE…. MARRRRVELOUS MARRRIO MAURAKO!!!!!

After the bell has rung Triple M refuses let go of the Full Nelson. Joel Hortega tries to admonish Triple M but unfortunately for Sektor Triple M doesn’t speak Spanish so he has no clue what Hortega is telling him. Mario continues to pull and torque the neck of Sektor as Mario screams at him. Bobbinette Carey who is still at ringside just stands there and looks on at the sight in the ring neither seeming happy nor displeased with the evens unfolding in front of her.

Triple M finally releases the Full Nelson and then drags Sektor by his arm over to the ring apron. Mario climbs out of the ring and grabs a steel chair before walking back over to the ring and dragging Sektor over and draping his left arm over the side of the ring apron. As Sektor lies on his stomach with his left arm left at the mercy of Triple M, Mario raises the steel chair high into the air and holds it there for a second before it comes crashing down on the left arm and shoulder of Sektor.

Sektor squirms around on the matt holding his shoulder, as the rest of the HOW referees run down to assist Hortega with the chaos. As the refs climb into the ring Bobbinette Carey nonchalantly turns and walks to back to the locker room. Triple M grabs a microphone from ringside and climbs back inside the ring with the mic and the chair.

Mario Maurako: See Sektor that is what happens when you question the leadership skills of The

Marvelous One. I have now proven my dominance over Sektor and proven to the whole world that I am the unquestioned leader of the Argonauts of Awesome. Let that also be a message to Michael DeNucci and Crow who both seem to think that they are above me. Crow I’ve already proven that I can beat you in the past by taking your ICON Championship and at War Games I’m going to once again beat you for HOW Gold.

Mario Maurako: As for you DeNucci I’ve issued the Challenge and it is now in the hands of Lee or Max. One of the two will book the match and when they do I’ll prove to you and the entire wrestling world why I’m the #1 Contender for the HOW World Title and you’re challenging for the World Title of a Fisher Price Fed.

Maurako throws the microphone down and goes to exit the ring but instead stops. He looks down at Sektor who is lying on his side with referees surrounding him all looking at his shoulder. Maurako shouts at the Refs and raises the chair high above his head again. The referees run for the hills as Triple M brings the chair down on Sektor’s left shoulder not once, or twice, but three more times. Mario then tosses the chair down and exits the ring while the fans look on in shock as the action cuts backstage.

 

Bob has Heat

The action cuts backstage where we see a bloodied Bob Jared sitting with the same EMT’s who were working on him after getting attacked by America before Turmoil even went on the air. Part of Jared’s head is already bandaged and as the camera zooms in we see a fresh cut on the other side of his forehead.

Several fans begin to gather around the ambulance and when Jared notices one of the fans be begins shaking his fist and pointing at the fan as to who to get answers from as the EMT’s are just at a loss to how Jared got this second cut and Bob has been unable to tell them himself.

Medic: “Hey you, you know anything about this?”

Fan: “I was just asking for an interview, that’s all. Then, all of a sudden.”

The fan shakes his head, as Jared looks him dead in the eye waiting for an answer.

Medic: “And then what?”

Fan: “He came out of nowhere, shouted for Bob to turn around and then, it was over in seconds.”

Medic: “Who has done this?”

Fan: “I don’t know, like I said to you, it was over in seconds.”

Jared continues to be cleaned up, continuing to shake his head at what’s gone on as the action switches back to ringside.

Joe Hoffman: “Look’s like someone else had it in for Jared as if I am understanding this right..he was attacked again??”

Benny Newell: “What do you expect Joe, he’s a curtain jerker. A waste of oxygen.”

Joe Hoffman: “You forget he holds two big victories over Kostoff & Chris America.”

Benny Newell: “Very impressive.”

Benny replies in a sarcastic manner as he takes a drink from his usual bottle of whiskey as Turmoil cuts to commercial as the EMT’s stitch Jared up for the second time today.

 


June 8th the future of High Octane Wrestling will be decided.

War Games Match
Team Best vs. Team Kael

World Title Match
Triple M vs. Crow©

SSE World Title Match
Michael DeNucci vs. King Trip Eisen vs. Trent©

LSD Title Match
Chris Kostoff vs. David Black vs. Bob Jared vs. Static©

Loser Gets Besty and a Dress Match
Silver Cyanide vs. Scottywood

Crow© vs. Darkwing
Singles Match

Back live from commercial and the crowd roars in anticipation for their World Champion when “Come With Me” by Puff Daddy hits the speakers. Crow emerges from the back to an enormous pop and confidently struts to the ring with the World Title draped over his right shoulder. He hopes up on the ring apron and raises the title high into the air, proud that he is the World Champion and that he’s defended the title successfully in some amazing matches against Jatt Starr, Issac Slade, and John Sektor. Knowing that his opponent tonight is no slouch either, he doesn’t waste much time and begins his normal pre-match routine by stretching and psyching himself up in the corner of the ring.

“Animal I’ve Become” by 3 Days Grace hits and the crowd pops just as loud, if not louder for the self-proclaimed “Most Charismatic Man in HOW.” The arena lights cut out and Darkwing appears at the top of the entrance ramp amidst the spotlights and flashing lights. He extends his arms to the sides and an explosion of pyro shoots out, bringing the arena lights back in the process.

Joe Hoffman: What’s the problem, Benny?

Benny Newell: (who is covering his ears) I can’t stand these fans with their ‘Darkwing’ and ‘Crow’ chants. It’s making me sick!

Joe Hoffman: I think that would be the whiskey talking…

Regardless, Benny takes another shot of Jack Daniels as Darkwing climbs up the steps and across the ring apron, raising his fist and taking in the applause. He shoots Crow a glare who returns it with an unwavering focused expression on the Hall of Famer. Referee Matt Boettcher checks both men after Darkwing steps into the ring and quickly calls for the bell after while the crowd can’t decide who to cheer louder for.

They start the match by locking up, with Darkwing using his size and underrated strength to back the smaller World Champion into the corner. Boettcher order to break the hold after a few moments of standstill and Darkwing obliges, holding his hands out as if to say ‘I let go.’ Crow lets him back up without any underhanded tactics and they lock up again, this time with Crow spinning around for a waist lock. He lifts Darkwing and then plants him face first on the mat with a takedown with his arms still locked around his waist. Darkwing attempts to stand up and break free but Crow has different ideas and sends Darkwing flying behind him with a beautiful German Suplex into a pin.

1…

2…

KICKOUT after 1 and a half!

Crow maintains the advantage with an arm bar so wrenching that it looks like Darkwing’s shoulder is popped out. Out of nowhere, Darkwing somersaults forward and flips out, reversing the arm bar before planting Crow with a Side Russian Leg Sweep.

Joe Hoffman: Darkwing showing tremendous athleticism right there; something that he’s not widely known for but certainly capable of.

Benny Newell: HA! Darkwing is a no talent schmuck! You don’t actually believe he stands a chance in this match, do you Joe?

Joe Hoffman: Darkwing has shown tremendous poise and focus as of late… at least in the ring. I can’t really say the same regarding his personal exploits though.

Benny Newell: Fucking idiot… he just cost himself a title shot at War Games because of his stupidity.

Joe Hoffman: Surely it will be a lesson learned for him and it doesn’t seem to be bothering him at the moment

Darkwing continues with his attack by wearing Crow down with a Power Slam and a Samoan Drop, which elicits a 2 count after the cover. With Crow slow to his feet, Darkwing crouches and gears up for the Trans-Darkwing Express, but just at the last possible second, Crow steps aside and tosses Darkwing through the ropes to the outside of the ring. Darkwing lands hard and is unaware of what’s about to come next.

Joe Hoffman: DIVING CORKSCREW PLANCHA ONTO DARKWING!

Crowd: HOLY – SHIT! HOLY – SHIT! …

Boettcher begins the 10 count on both men who are laid out on the outside but Crow is the first to his feet. He grabs Darkwing by the back of his cut-off t-shirt and tosses him back inside, following close behind by climbing up the turnbuckle. With Darkwing back to his feet, Crow leaps off for a Cross Body but Darkwing catches him! Darkwing smiles and hoists Crow up into a Fireman’s Carry for the Nightfall, an Eye of the Hurricane maneuver, but Crow slides off, spins around and lands devastating DDT which has Darkwing stunned!

Benny Newell: This is why he’s the World Champion, Joe. Crow has been prepared for EVERY one of Darkwing’s signature moves and it’s going to cost Darkwing if it continues throughout the match.

Joe Hoffman: I- I’m speechless by your analysis.

Crow drapes his arm for the cover!

1…

2…

3…

Joe Hoffman: NO!!!! Darkwing got the shoulder up!

Crow is astonished that Darkwing kicked out and shows no signs of letting up. With Darkwing seated on the mat, Crow bounces off the ropes and flies forward, landing a dropkick right to the face of DW!

Another cover…

1…

2…

KICKOUT AGAIN!

Benny Newell: Just give up already, will ya?

Joe Hoffman: Darkwing’s no-quit attitude is on full display here tonight.

Crow is clearly becoming frustrated and calls for the end; the Fallen Tombstone Piledriver finisher much to the delight of the crowd. However, some of the fans rally behind Darkwing by chanting his name and this seems to spark the first-ever ICON champion. Crow hoists Darkwing onto his shoulder to get him in position but Darkwing rolls forward and ends up rolling up the Champion!

1…

2…

NO!!!

Darkwing does his best to fend off the Champion for some recovery time, but Crow is right back on the attack, fueled by the near loss right there. Some kicks to the face and the mid-section has Darkwing stunned for a moment and long enough for Crow to set him up for his Sit-down Powerbomb. But just as Crow heaves him into the air, Darkwing fights back with punches and uses his weight to fall forward, right on top of the World Champion! It’s not long before Darkwing turns the tables with…

Joe Hoffman: THE INGLEWOOD CLOVERLEAF!!! He’s got Crow locked in the center of the ring!

Benny Newell: Hell Joe, even I can admit this would be a HUGE upset if Darkwing can make him tap out!

Crow struggles and struggles and screams in pain but Darkwing is applying tremendous pressure with his knee on the back of Crow’s head. With the ropes in sight, Crow extends his arm and uses all of his upper body weight to pull himself towards it but Darkwing is doing his best not to let up.

The crowd is going absolutely berserk and the tension within the Best Arena is immense! Finally…

Joe Hoffman: CROW ALMOST REACHED THE ROPES BUT DARKWING HAS JUST PULLED HIM BACK TO THE CENTER OF THE RING!!

The crowd is going crazy as Darkwing repositions himself and sits back deeper in the hold but Crow doesn’t scream out in pain as he was actually waiting on this moment and he reaches back and uses his impressive leg strength to grab Darkwings legs and Crow powers out of the hold and stumbles up and pulls back on Darkwing’s legs to lock in his own cloverleaf hold.

Joe Hoffman: OH MY GOD WHAT A MOVE BY THE CHAMPION AS IT IS NOW CROW WHO HAS DARKWING IN THE CLOVERLEAF IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING!!

Crow leans back with all his might and the awkward way Crow locked in the hold is actually putting more pressure on the back of Darkwing but the Hall of Famer refuses to give up but he is unable to move either.

After a few minutes Darkwing goes lifeless and Boettcher lifts his arm up and it drops lifelessly to the mat as Joe notes that Darkwing has passed out from the pain!

1…………………

Boettcher lifts the arm again and it falls again.

2……………………..

The crowd is on the edge of their seats as Boettcher lifts Darkwings arm again…….and it falls!!

3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WINNER OF THE MATCH IN 18:23 WORLD CHAMPION CROW!!

Post match we see Crow struggle to the back with his World Title as the crowd gives both men a standing ovation for a great effort.

 


Turmoil cuts to commercial as Joe tells the viewers that Scott Woodson’s farewell speech is next!!

 

Goodbye…

We return from commercial as “You Can’t Stop Me” by Guano Apes is playing over the P.A. system and we see Darkwing in the ring and Bobbinette Carey signing some autographs around ringside.

Joe Hoffman: It was posted on howrestling.com last night that after being named in a ballot tampering scandal for the Wrestler of the Month award, Scottywood was fired as Commissioner of HOW and only hours later he announced that he would announce his retirement tonight on TNT.

Benny Newell: I bought an extra bottle of Jack for this wonderful occasion Joe, it’s like Christmas! Now all we need is Lee and his pen….

Bobbinette finishes he round of autographs and makes her into the ring along side Darkwing. Set up in the ring we see a podium with Scottywood’s logo on it and a plaint splatter designed carpet covering the ring.

Joe Hoffman: Seems Scottywood spared no expense for this announcement. Sure Lee will not be happy with the bill for this when he gets it….I mean look at that mahogany podium….

OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH, You Gotta Keep ’em Separated.

“Stricken” by Disturbed cuts in as there is a roar from the crowd as the former Commissioner, Scottywood makes his way out from backstage. One would think he would be wearing something nice for his retirement speech, but he has on his Hardcore Artist hockey jersey, a pair of torn of jeans and his jet black Oakley’s with his barbwire hockey stick in his hand. He starts to walk down the ramp and a large pyro explosion goes off behind him.

Joe Hoffman: He was Commissioner for almost 5 months here in HOW, 2 time LSD champion, one of which was the longest in HOW history since we reopened. He also is a 4 time Stable Champion, winning the belt in The Best Alliance and Ascension.

Benny Newell: Only one of which he actually won.

Joe Hoffman: Well it is a team title Benny.

The sunglasses hide his emotions well as he makes his way slowly towards the ring as if he doesn’t really want this to happen….Or it could be he is still in a lot of pain from the attack by Lee Best on Mayhem. He reaches the ring and stops as he starts to climb the steel steps and enter the ring. He walks up to his podium and his music starts to fade out.

Scottywood: In January of 2000 I started the Xtreme Wrestling Federation, which would later become the legend that is Next Generation Wrestling. I made a name for myself there as a world class fed owner and wrestler. During some of it’s numerous breaks I would go on to compete in Hate Wrestling, Encore Entertainment, WMW, Global and many other feds. In September, after a long absence and battle with alcoholism I finally joined High Octane Wrestling. Now over the past 9 or so month, I have had a lot of fun here in HOW. I crucified Ken Davidson, beat Kostoff in his own House of Pain match and had a hell of a battle at The Alamo with Christopher America.

Benny Newell: His best PPV match since he lost.

Joe Hoffman: Shut up Benny and drink your damn Jack.

Scottywood: But I have also done some stupid things, which I won’t go into detail about, but nothing I regret, because if you start doubting what you have done, then that is when you start to fail. So with that I feel it is time for a change, time for something new for Scottywood. I have busted a lot of people open with this hockey stick….

Bobbinette: Even after my best efforts to stop you from doing so.

Scottywood: Yes you tried….

Scottywood suddenly swings around and with a quick, hard shot he knocks Bobbinette off her feet with the barbwire hockey stick as the crowd gasps in shock as blood starts to flow from the face of Bobbinette. Darkwing is in shock himself as he gets a shot to the stomach with the stick and crumples over and rolls out of the ring.

Joe Hoffman: Scottywood has just snapped!

Benny Newell: Now this is the entertaining Scottywood I loved!

The crowd is now booing loudly as Scottywood just stands over Bobbinette, watching the blood flow across her face. He removes the microphone from the podium and kneels down in front of Bobbinette’s face.

Scottywood: Like I said Bobbie, it is time for a change. Time to get myself away from the Curse of Carey. I have realized that everything you touch Bobbie is doomed for failure. Team Epic, Knights of Epicness and one by one the members of Ascension began to fall. Slade and Faze are in the hospital; you lost the stable title in 7 days, I lost my Commissionership. Only one immune is Darkwing, but it’s hard to fall when you’re already at rock bottom.

Benny Newell: The Curse of Epic Failure

Scottywood: So I am making a change and getting away from you Bobbie before you completely destroy me and turn me into a walking joke like duck boy there. But don’t worry Bobbie, I got you something to make this all better for you.

Walking over to the side of the ring, he tells one of the crewmembers to hand him something.

Scottywood: One of the special Ascension foot long subs, I mean I know how much you love having foot longs in your mouth….wait….yep, I said that right. So open wide Bobbie and ejoy…

He unwraps the sub and starts shoving the meatball sub into the face of Bobbinette, making a complete mess and covering her face with sauce.

Joe Hoffman: Someone get him out of that damn ring and away from her!

We then hear “All Star” by Smash Mouth play as Frankie the Cameraman rushes down the ramp with a steel chair in hand. The crowd is roaring with cheers as Frankie slides into the ring and swings the chair at Scotty who dodges it and knocks Frankie out with another home run swing of the barbwire hockey stick, laying Frankie out right next to Bobbinette.

Scottywood: Really Frankie? I thought we back on the same page here, and then you go and side with the bitch? I mean you’re already a “epic” failure, so you siding with Bobbinette can’t hurt you any. Maybe I should have some scientists study you so they can find a cure for this curse she has….hmmmm

Joe Hoffman: Frankie tried to save Bobbinette, but he just wasn’t a match for Scottywood.

Benny Newell: Frankie should have just kept himself in the production truck where he belongs.

Scottywood: You can try and mask evil all you want, call it by a different name, give it a pretty bow tie, but the fact is it is still evil. You tried to change me Bobbinette and you failed, just like everything you do. I can not be changed, I am who I am and I really don’t care if the people love me, or hate me. For

Joe Hoffman: I think it’s safe to say its hate right now.

Scottywood: So contrary to what this speech was suppose to be about, your not going to be getting rid of me this easily. You see I still have a lot of unfinished business to take care of, business which I was hampered by you Bobbie, that is why you and Ascension will suffer. Though I would love to thank Lee Best for the grand party he threw for me…or at least the party the HOW credit card he failed to cancel yet on me has thrown for me….Which makes me remember the balloons and confetti….

Moments later we see red and black balloons and confetti rain down from the rafters of The Best Arena to the displeasure of the fans as some pyros shoot out from the ring post.

Scottywood: Almost forgot about those pyros. As for others who I intend to make suffer, that list includes the two men who decided to fire me as Commissioner, Lee Best and Max Kael. Lee, you placed me in a concrete box after brutally attacking me on Monday, and then you fire me as Commissioner for allegedly tampering with ballots. How hypocritically coming from the man who states on a weekly basis that he will blatantly cheat to win. And Max Kael, who agreed with Lee on the decision to let me go, a man who instead of being co-owner should have a straight jacket and a padded room at the upstate psych ward. Plus what the fuck is this 57 dollar bill from 1-800-MAX-KAEL?

Benny Newell: Hypocritically? Hardly! Things just are different for Lee Best.

Joe Hoffman: Point just proven.

Scottywood: I no longer care who wins at War Games, but however does, I want them to know that I am going to be more then a thorn in their side. Oh and Lee, don’t think you can just screw me over until War Games with lopsided match after lopsided match. You see that little stunt you pulled on Monday has put me on the shelf for a significant amount of time. But don’t worry, I will be all better when War Games rolls along, I wouldn’t miss the look on one of your faces when you loose all your power in HOW.

Benny Newell: Ya, I can’t wait to see the look on Max’s face.

Scottywood: But at last, it is time for this party to end, yes Bobbie I have to leave you, but don’t worry, I will be seeing you again very soon.

Scottywood takes his hand and wipes it across Carey’s face and looks down at his hand and smiles.

Scottywood: Yes, your blood is on my hands, and it will be again…along with many others. Come on Frankie, it’s time to go, I have something very special planned for you.

Joe Hoffman: Time to go? He is knocked out cold.

Scottywood grabs Frankie and pulls him up off the mat and throws him up over his shoulder as “Stricken” starts to play again and he makes his way out of the ring with Frankie and his hockey stick, as the EMTs finally dive into the ring and check on Bobbinette.

Joe Hoffman: I don’t like where this is head for Frankie….Scotty has lost it and taken Frankie hostage almost….just what we need more of in HOW.

Scottywood reaches the top of the ramp and turns around and looks back at the EMTs attending to Bobbinette and blows her a kiss as the sick smile remains on his face.

 


Could he be more than an Enforcer at War Games?

 

Not Drugs…Just LSD

Back from commercial and we cut back live to ringside; ‘No More Sorrow’ by Linkin Park begins to play, causing most of the fans to instantly begin to boo as the guitar riff kicks into play. The drums join the riff and as they do, the LSD Champion Guy Stephen’s walks out onto the stage wearing an all black suit without a tie and the collar undone, with his LSD Title draped over his right shoulder.

The crowd continue to go nuts raining down on the LSD champion with boo’s and insults. Static laughs them off, as he stands in the centre of the stage. Static raises his title in the air as the insults continue to flood towards him. He makes his way to the ring, fans screaming over the barriers toward him as he ignores and keeps on walking. He enters the ring and then poses in the ring with the title above his head, now beginning to talk back to the crowd and pointing at his title. Static is handed a mic and pauses for a second as his music fades out.

Static: “You know, I’ve been wondering a lot this past week.”

The crowd start up an ‘asshole’ chant, as Newell states that they should give Static some well-deserved credit as the LSD champion.

Static: “Yes, I am an asshole, but I’m LSD champ asshole. In fact that’s the reason I am out here, not only because I am the LSD champion, but to prove how much of an asshole I am too.”

The crowd begin to silence as Static just manages to get his words out amongst the noise of the crowd.

Static: “You see, I am here to talk about war games. On Monday Max Kael announced that Bob Jared would be placed in the LSD title match at War Games. So now I have to fight David Black, Ryan Faze…”

The crowd begin to chant once more this time with a ‘Faze of HOW’ chant, Static laughs to himself. Then cuts the crowd off.

Static: “The former LSD champion Ryan Faze, Chris Kostoff and of course, The Texas Tumbleweed that is Bob Jared. Well after certain goings on over the past weeks you really wouldn’t be worrying in the current situation that I find myself in I mean seriously. You got David Black, a man I defended my title against in excellent fashion 3 days ago. You’ve got faze who I beat for the title. Chris Kostoff, the only thing strong about him these days is his piss stained underwear that’s about as old as he is. Jared’s young enough to be that old mans son for crying out loud. And speaking of Jared, well; I don’t think he’s going to make it to war games after tonight’s little mishap. ”

Static smirks to himself again as the HOV screen comes to life, it shows the backstage area and Bob

Jared walking down a hallway. A fan stops and asks for his autograph and as Jared searches for a pen a voice can be heard shouting for Jared to turn around. As he does his face meets the side of a steel chair sending him crashing to the concrete floor. As Jared staggers back to his feet we see this time the attacker uses the chair as a battering ram and sandwiches Jared between the wall and the chair. The attacker then turns around revealing it to be Static.

Static then repeatedly hits Jared with the chair, braying it off his head several times before throwing it to one side. Static is then seen handing twenty bucks to the fan and thanking him for the distraction as he walks off with an arrogant grin on his face.

The HOV screen goes black as the crowd begins to boo severely towards Static. Hoffman explains to the viewers how earlier we saw an out cold Jared receiving medical attention and how Static is a sick and twisted human being, with Newell only adding that he thinks its great how Static is building great momentum here in HOW despite the death of his older brother. Static just grins to himself and begins to speak again.

Static: “You see, it’s because of the actions of Max Kael that this now has to be done. He wants to stack the odds against me because I am Best Alliance. Well Max, that isn’t going to happen. I am taking this opportunity to inform you that unless you agree for me to name to stipulation for the LSD title match at War Games. Then I shall continue to take out anyone who wants to stand in my way. I will continue to destroy my War Games opponents one by one unless you agree Kael. I don’t care how many people I have to go through to make you see sense. However I guarantee that once this human wrecking ball gets moving, there are no second chances. I will bring your world, crashing down.”

Static drops the mic and raises his title high in the air as the crowd roar with angry gestures and insults towards the BA member. Static stands looking smug as we fade into the final commercial as up next is the Main Event as newly inducted Hall of Famer Maximillian Kael takes on ICON Champion Triple P!!

 


I STILL have no f’n idea how this is making the air..

 

Max Kael vs. Perfect Paul Paras©
Singles Match

We return to ringside where Max Kael is already in the ring with Shane Reynolds reluctantly with him. We see Triple P making his way down the ramp and into the ring as referee Joel Hortega checks both men over for any illegal items.

Joe Hoffman: Max Kael vs. Triple P here, could be a big night for P if he could score a pinfall over co-owner and newest Hall of Fame member Max Kael.

Benny Newell: Kael…..lose……gonna……to……Peeeeeeee

Joe looks over at Benny who he believes is actually peeing himself as his slams into the announce table and Joe takes the bottle of Jack away from Benny. Hortega is done checking the men over as he calls for the bell and we are underway here with our main event. Triple P and Kael quickly lock up as the crowd seems to be firmly behind Kael as he goes up against AoA member Triple P who gets the first advantage as he throws Max to the floor and proceeds to follow it up with a hard spine buster.

Joe Hoffman: Triple P impressive early as he has control of this match.

Max tries to get back to his feet but is taken back down quickly by a super kick from Triple P as Shane Reynolds has a large smile on his face and just shakes hia head as he starts to leave the ringside area and head backstage. Max manages to get back to his feet and see Reynolds leaving and starts to yell at him to return to the ring. Shane stops and turns around and shakes his head.

Max: You will come back to the ring and kneel before me…you will KNE….

Max is cut off as Triple P uses the distraction to lock in his Anaconda Vice finisher he calls the Messianic Complex. Max tries to fight it as Shane turns his back to the ring again and continues to make his way to the back. Max continues to try and make his way to the ropes or break free but there is no way out for him as he is forced to tap out as Joel Hortega calls for the bell.

Bryan McVay: The winner of this match by submission in 1 minutes and 49 seconds…..Triple P!!!

Joe Hoffman: An arguable upset by the ICON champion as he beats War Games captain and Hall of Famer Max Kael….albeit from a slight distraction from Shane Reynolds.

Benny Newell: Why…..He….stand chance of……zero…..against…..Lee Fuckin’ Best.

Joe Hoffman: Go back to sleep Benny.

Benny Newell: Ok…..

OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH, You Gotta Keep em’ Separated.

As Triple P is celebrating his big win over Max Kael we see Scottywood make his way out onto the stage with barbed wire hockey stick in hand as he is making his way towards the ring with a slight limp, but still with a purpose.

Benny Newell: Scottywood?,,,,,didn’t he…..retire?

Joe Hoffman: No he didn’t, and it looks like he has his sights set on Max Kael.

Hoffman is exactly right as The Hardcore Artist is staring a hole through the fallen co-owner as he slides into the ring and stalks Max who is struggling to make his way back to his feet. Hortega tries to stop Scottywood, but he gets tossed out of the ring for his effort. Scottywood smile is disturbing as he shakes back and forth as Max pulls himself to his feet using the top rope.

Joe Hoffman: This has no good ending folks….Scottywood has that hockey stick cocked and loaded and he is about to fire.

Benny Newell: Cock….hahahaha

Max is fully up to his feet and he turns around as Scottywood almost takes Max’s head off with the hockey stick as he see him drop to the Mat, blood pouring from his forehead. Scottywood drops to the mat, verbally assaulting Max as he takes the barbwire and digs in into the forehead of Max more as we see suddenly hear “Undead” by Hollywood Undead start to play and The Best Alliance lead by Lee Best and followed by Shane Reynolds and Aceldama with their Stable titles, Static with his LSD title, Mark O’Neil and Shocker.

Joe Hoffman: The Best Alliance? Lee must not be happy with Scottywood crashing his main event like this. He promised ratings, and while this is good television, it’s not what Lee Best wants to see, especially from a man he just fired as Commissioner.

Lee Best stands up on the stage as his Best Alliance members make their way down towards the ring and surround it as Scottywood gets back to his feet and stands over the body of Max Kael and staring down at it as he also stands guard with his hockey stick against The Best Alliance members.

Joe Hoffman: I can’t believe this folks, but we are we are out of time! We have to leave you all, Lee Best will not be happy we are cutting the feed now….

Benny Newell: He…..owns…..network….

Joe Hoffman: Yes he may, but contracts are contracts, we will see you Monday night on Mayhem……good night!

As Turmoil ends the final image we see is of Scottywood being totally surrounded by The Best Alliance and the crowd going crazy in the background as the former Commish stands tall over the bloodied Co Owner Maximillian Kael as the Best Alliance members prepare to rush the ring!!!!

END OF TRANSMISSION

 

BONUS!!!

As the shows draws to a close all around him, staff pack their various pieces of equipment and begin to put in motion their plans for the evening, Shane Reynolds has one thing left to do. Having broken away from Max directly after his match, on the proviso that he head straight back to the basement of his estate, Shane reaches the end of the last corridor and steps out into the parking lot.

There he stops. And waits…. … … … …Until the voice suddenly comes, deep from within the shadows to his left. Its a voice no-one would recognise, no-one but Shane, and he turns to it instantly.

Man: You got the money?

Shane answers by reaching his pocket and pulling out a pile of dollar bills that have been rolled up and fastened together by a rubber band. He throws it to the man and it lands with a slight thud by his feet. Crouching down to pick it up, the man’s face becomes visible in the light from the door behind Shane. It’s the man who had interfered in the Bobbinette Carey and Christopher America match.

Man: Thanks.

Shane turns on this note and goes to walk away, offering no thanks in return. Before he disappears into shadows of his own, though, the man shouts to him, as Shane suspects so many people in a similar position do, out of curiosity.

Man: Why do you hate Christopher America so much?

Shane: Aside from the fact he is a risk to my freedom, I don’t. I despise the AoA – he just happens to be one of the worst parts of it.

Man: Along with who?

Shane: Sektor…..Triple M….Silver Cyanide…..Triple P. Take your pick!

Man: You’re gunning for all of them?

Shane: Well, Triple P set the challenge…..So yeah, eventually they will get what’s coming. Don’t worry about it, though. I can handle it from here.

And with that, he is gone. His dark clothes merging finally with the shadows lurking all around him.

Show Details

The Best Arena

Chicago, Illinois

Show times

  • 9:00PM
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