Monday Night Mayhem
October 7th, 2002
Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, MI
Pyros go off all over Joe Louis Arena as the first ever Monday Nite Mayhem kicks off. The arena is packed and everyone is on their feet. The camera pans all over the arena as fans look stupid trying to get on TV. The broadcast starts with our announce team of Jow Hoffmann and the returning on demand….Chris Tucker!
Joe: Welcome everyone to the first ever Monday Nite Mayhem. Tonight we will crown the first ever champions of our proud new organization….High Octane Wrestling. Back by high demand is my broadcast partner, Chris Tucker. Chris, why do you think about the upcoming matches??
Chris: I really don’t give a damn. I am hear to promote my movie and because Best gave me a shitload of green, for the shit he took last week. I knew someone took my shit!!
Joe: As well as that my be, tonight will be a great contest of wills. Someone is going to have to win three matches tonight to become the first ever Hardcore champion. Then to top it off we have the highly anticipated match up of the tow finalists of the Rumble on last weeks TNT…..Jason Sinn and the wrestler formerly known as Mcleod…Miniac.
Chris: Who? God damn. Cant anybody keep their damn name the same anymore? What is this Purple Rain?
Joe: Huh? Well never mind lets get straight to the action. Our first match up is a first round match in the Hardcore Title tournament, pitting Jason Ice and The Crow. The winner of this match will face two other winners in a triple threat matchup later in the show. The stakes are high for this one.
Chris: Don’t the guys start getting paid for winning matches now? If its about money…I got my boy Ice Cube winning the tournament. I mean CMON..who else it gonna be?
Joe: We will soon find out…..
Jason Ice vs. The Crow
All the lights go out in the arena. Suddenly a single spotlight is shown in the middle of the ring. Standing in the middle is the 6’2″ 272 lb. Superstar names The Crow. He has his head down and suddenly jerks his head up and all the lights come back on at the same time.
Joe: What an entrance for The Crow who ran off the other Crow.
Chris: Don’t even start early tonight. I am still confused about that shit. Don’t fuck with my head no more.
Suddenly the 6’3″ 237 lb frame of Jason Ice comes running down to the ring with a chair in hand and Mayhem is underway!
Ice swings the chair wildly at The Crow, but the Crow dodges the attempt easily. Ice swings again and once again The Crow sidesteps another feeble attempt. Frustrated Jason Ice rushes straight at The Crow, and The Crow executes a perfect drop toe hold and the chair flies out of Ice’s hands. The Crow snatches on a headlock. Ice fights to his feet and Irish whips The Crow into the ropes. The Crow executes a shoulderblock and Ice goes down. Crow gives Ice a look…bounces off the ropes, duck under by Ice and Crow executes a flying elbow. Crow cinches in another headlock.
Joe: Its apparent that The Crow plans to wear down the technical Jason Ice.
Once again Ice fights to his feet, and attempts to whip Crow back into the ropes but the Crows strength allows him to hold on to the headlock, forcing Ice to one knee. Crow lets go of the headlock and executes a perfect dropkick to the head of Ice. Crow goes to the outside and picks up a chair. He slides back into the ring and walks up to the writhing Jason Ice.
Chris: Damn the freak is gonna end this quick!
Instead of hitting Ice, Crow drops the chair behind him and executes a perfect T-bone suplex onto the chair!!
Joe: Oh my God. The Crow isn’t here to play tonight. He is going for the win early. Which is the smart thing to do in this tournament.
Crow covers. 1…2…. Kickout by Ice. A look of frustration is on Crow’s face as he delivers a DDT onto the chair! He covers once again. 1…2…kickout again! Frustrated Crow slides out of the ring and reaches underneath the ring to pull out a table. He looks to grab another item, but instead shakes his head no, and slides the table into the ring.
Crow sets up the table in the corner and walks up to the dazed Jason Ice. Crow walks backward with Ice in hand. With a look behind him Crow throws Ice into the table via a devastating belly to back suplex. The crowd is stunned by The Crow’s utter dominance.
Cover. 1….2……foot on the ropes by Ice.
Joe: What a mistake by The Crow. You have to know your ring position. Have to believe that he had the match won if he had covered him in the middle of the ring.
The Crow is more frustrated at himself now. Crow signals for his finisher. He drags Jason Ice to the middle of the ring…picks him up on his shoulder and puts him in the tombstone position.
Joe: He’s going for his finisher The Crow Effect.
With full force The Crow drives Jason Ice’s head into the chair with his finisher The Crow effect. Crow slides the chair out of the ring and tells the ref to get in position for the 3 count. Cover. 1….2…..
Chris: WHAT THE FUCK?? The damn lights just went out. Wheres my shit. CMON wheres my shit…..they aint getting mine. This shit has the red buds…I mean…
Suddenly the lights come back on in the arena. In the ring Jason Ice is pinning The Crow. The ref looks confused as both men appeared to be out of it. With a little hesitation the ref makes the count.1…..2…..3
DING DING DING
The winner of the match via pinfall Jason Ice.
Joe: What the hell happened. It happened so fast. Obviously someone has got it out for The Crow. Well at any rate Jason moves on to the next round, which will be a triple threat match. Oh my what a way to start Mayhem.
Chris: Shut up Joe. Look. That damn bird is up and moving around. Looks like he got hit in the head. Oh shit…he looks like someone just stole his shit!
The Crow is holding his head. He has been busted open. He looks for the ref, but the ref had already ran to the back. Next The Crow looks down at the slow moving Jason Ice. Still holding his head The Crow slides out of the ring and retrieves another table. He sets it up in the middle of the ring and delivers a few blows to Ice. With a crooked smile Crow once again slides out of the ring and reaches under the ring for the items he shook his head to earlier.
Joe: Get someone out here now! The man has gasoline and a mini blowtorch. Oh no, he just doused the table with gasoline….he just lit it on fire!!
The crowd is on their feet as The Crow picks up Jason Ice. Crow points to the table and the crowd starts to cheer, wanting to see Ice go thru the table.
Joe: OH MY GOD CROW JUST BODYSLAMMED JASON ICE THRU THE BURNING TABLE.
Chris: Now that’s some cool shit. Man Ice smells like chicken..what the fuck
HOW security men jump into the ring and put the flames out. The Crow jumps the guard rail and walks out thru the crowd. Meanwhile HOW medical personal carry Jason Ice out on a stretcher.
Omar Rasheem vs. PBD
Bombs over Baghdad by Outkast play as Omar Rasheem makes his way to the ring on a camel. Halfway down the ramp Omar stops the camel and sand and pyros shoot out of the stage as Omar raises his hands. He leaves his camel at ringside, gets into the ring and poses on two turnbuckles pounding on his chest then raising his hands.
Joe: This match is hardcore rules and part of the tournament. Look at the newcomer, Omar Rasheem. Looks impressive, doesn’t he?
Chris: Man, I aint thinking about him. I’m trying to smoke this shit over here.
As Omar poses, PBD comes down to the ring. He starts to attack Omar but he gets the upper and puts PBD into the corner with some hard right hands. He whips him but pulls him back into a reverse waistlock and nails a hard german suplex.
Omar slides to the outside and grabs a chair. He tosses it into the ring. He also grabs a stop sign. He gets back in the ring and begins to beat PBD in the head. He sets the sign on the ground and hits a piledriver on it.
Chris: Goddamn, you see that?
Joe: What a stiff piledriver by Omar. He seems to be getting the upper hand in this match up.
Chris: Damn right on that one. Man, you wanna hit this joint?
Joe: No thanks.
He picks up PBD and whips him to the ropes. PBD rebounds and comes back to Omar and eats a big boot. Omar stomps down on PBD. He picks him hits the Oil Mill on the chair.
Joe: What a maunuver there by Omar! He is really making a name for himself already.
Chris: Man the match is over.
Joe: How do you know?
He signals for the end. PBD staggers to his and Omar takes his head off with brutal Sand Storm. He covers…
Winner: Omar Rasheem
Chris: I told you ass it was over.
Joe: And what a quick match. Omar showed his strength and made a good showing tonight. His future in HOW is bright.
Chris: Not as bright as this joint.
Joe: Put that out before we both get fired. Do it quick,its time for our third match.
Juggalo Extreme vs. Ice Cube
Cross Thy Bridge by ICP pumps over the PA system as Juggalo Extreme makes his way down to the ring. The crowd is indifferent to Extreme for they have not heard or seen much from him. JE stands with a smug look on his face and awaits his opponent.
Joe: Juggalo Extreme is a big X factor in this tournament. Haven’t seen or heard from him since signing his contract. I am curious to see how he responds in a singles match.
Chris: I don’t give a shit about him…bring out my boy. bring out Cube..CMON.
Today was a Good Day pumps over the PA system and Ice Cube makes his way down to the ring. The crowd is cheering mildly for the outspoken superstar. Ice Cube walks into the squared circle full of confidence.
Joe: A different look for Ice Cube there. Seems a lot happier now that Mr. Best let him out of the office.
Chris: You think that shit was funny? Man if that were me I would pimp slap the shit out of best. I don’t give a damn if he has good weed.
Lockup. Ice Cube gains the early advantage with a side headlock. Cube is smiling the whole time. JE counters with a side suplex. JE drops a few elbows and goes for the quick cover. 1…..kickout by Cube.
Chris: Shit…its gonna take more than that to pin my nigga. Shit….
JE pulls Cube up to his feet and delivers 3 straight right hands knocking the former rap star down to the mat. JE smiles down at Cube as he delivers several kicks to the stomach. JE walks around the ring and looks to the crowd. JE gets a few boo’s but nothing more.
Frustrated by the indifference from the crowd, JE goes back on the offensive. JE delivers DDT after DDT. Still no crowd reaction.
Joe: That was 3 DDT’s in a row on your boy Chris. Cube is looking a little out of his league right now. And the crowd seems out of it.
Chris: Shit….I know this man.
JE picks up Cube and prepares to deliver a big suplex….small package counter by Ice Cube…1….2……3….
Chris: Oh shit! I didn’t think he would really win….oh shit…..
Joe: Ice Cubes acting classes paid off big time in that match. Not only did he survive 3 straight DDT’s he had enough in the bank to pull off what has to be considered a big upset.
Chris: I don’t give a fuck….Cube just won…shit that’s my dog!
The crowd erupts as Cube rolls quickly out of the ring and with his arms in the air walks back to the back. Juggalo Extreme is shouting obscenities as Mayhem cuts to commercial.
Come smoke with me and Chris Tucker…look what he did for me!
Shocker vs. Kanyoner
Joe: Ok we are back. We have our first triple threat match set up for later tonight. The winner of the two triple threat matches will face each other for the Hardcore Title. In the first triple threat we have Jason Ice vs. Omar Rasheem vs. Ice Cube. That should be a very interesting match in that each guy won his match in dramatic fashion. Lets get back to the action and find out who will be in the second triple threat
Joe: Our next match will be a good one. Shocker Vs Kanyoner in the next round of the hard-core battle.
Chris: As long as none of them take my stash, we all good.
Grindin-By Clipse BLASTS THE PA system as Kanyoner appears on the stage and walks down into the ring
Joe: Looks to be ready, seems focussed.
Chris: Who cares, just get the damn match rolling.
Thunderstruck by AC/DC pumps over the system as the ex-marine makes his way to the ring. He proposed a stipulation to this match but it was turned down by Kanyoner
Joe: The bell is run and this hard-core match is off and running
Kanyoner starts quick, Irish whipping Shocker in to the ropes. He lands a clothes line from hell. While shocker is down, Kanyoner beings to kick him in the rib area and kidney area. He picks him up and suplexes him down hard. he again picks up Shocker and whips him on to the corner hard. Shocker is thrown in so hard he hits the turnbuckle and stumbles forward, he is groggy, and met with a DDT!
Chris: He’s tearing Shockers shit up.
Joe: Defiantly focussing on the back and chest area. Good start.
Kanyoner sends Shocker in to the ropes again, this time he is setting him up for a back drop. Shocker counters by kicking him in the chest. Shocker immediately drops to a knee, pummeling Kanyoner in the face. The refs counting, 1….2….3….Shocker let him up.
Joe: Shocker seems pissed.
Chris: Wouldn’t you be if you got DDTed?
Shocker continues to punish Kanyoner in the corner with knees to the abdomen. He grabs Kanyoner by the hair and drags him to center ring. DDT! Shocker picks him up and put him on the top turnbuckle. Belly to belly suplexes off the top rope.
Joe: Belly to Belly suplexes off the top! Devastating, might be going for the win here and now!
Shocker covers. 1….2….kick out.
Chris: Ahh I knew it, Kanyoner kicks out.
Shocker slides outside, throws the trahs can full of stuff in to the ring. He slides back in. Before he can make it to his feet Kanyoner is up, and smashes him over the head with a stop sign.
Chris: Shocker is out! Shocker is Out!
Kanyoner covers. 1….2….Kick out!
Joe: Somehow, he kicked out. Amazing.
Still a little groggy shocker makes it to his feet. Kanyoner is arguing with the ref. Baseball Bat to the Nuts.
Chris: Damn, hope he didn’t have a party planned afterwards. He aint getting laid for a while.
Joe: The ref didn’t see it Shocker is covering. 1…..2… NO.. Kanyoner kicks out somehow..
Both men are groggy. The ref is checking on Kanyoner. Kanyoner hold on to the ref. He is holding him in the corner.
Chris: Wait who’s that running to the ring. He better not want my stash.
Joe: It AJ. AJ just slid in the ring. From Behind with a Sledge hammer. He nails Shocker in the back. Shocker is down. Shocker is Down!
AJ slides out of the ring and ducks. The ref turns around to see Shocker on the mat. Kanyoner falls on Shocker and covers.
Chris: Kanyoner is going to win … damn, there goes my 20 bucks.
Joe: Kanyoner has just won the match with help from AJ!
AJ takes off thru the crowd with a angry Shocker looking on. Shocker vows revenge as he heads back to the back.
Fangs vs. The Executioner
Joe: This next match should be a quick one. Fangs is obviously overmatched in this one.
Suddenly Back in Black pumps over the PA system and the owner of High Octane Wrestling is standing on the rampway. He is receiving a mixed reaction from the crowd.
Lee Best: Our next scheduled match Fangs vs. The Executioner will not be happening tonight folks. I am sorry to inform you all that Fangs has been given the pink slip. The Executioner will move on to the second triple match later on this evening. So the next…..
Suddenly today was a good day slams over the speakers. Best turns around annoyed. Instead of Ice Cube, the newly signed Dr.Dre comes walking out from the back. He takes in all the cheers as he steps right in front of Mr. Best and begins to speak.
Dr.Dre: Wzup Detroit!!!!! I am sure all yall are asking what the hell is Dr. Dre doing here? Well I am here to tell ya…..The Executioner is gonna have a match….and its gonna be against me so….
Suddenly The Executioner comes out of nowhere and nails Dr. Dre in the back of the head with a steel chair. Best begins to laugh loudly as the crowd boos.
Lee Best: You want a match Dre? Well you got it. Send a ref out here…cover him Jack.
A HOW referee appears and The Executioner signals that he isn’t done. He then executes half of his Total Execution finisher.
Joe: OH MY GOD. The Executioner has just double powerbombed Dr. Dre on the ramp. Where is Ice Cube at??
The Executioner and Lee Best stare at each other as the ref makes the 1…..2…..3 count.
Winner of the match….The Executioner.
Chris: What kind of shit was that? And where the hell is that mother…….
Suddenly Ice Cube rans out and nails The Executioner with a crowbar. Lee Best tries to get away but Ice Cube nails him in the back of the knee with the crowbar and Best limps back to the back. Ice Cube, to a chorus of cheers, helps Dr. Dre to the back.
Chico vs. Crazy
Joe: Well 2/3 of the second triple threat match is filled. Who do you think will win Chris…and what the hell just happened on the rampway??
Chris: I dont give a damn. My boy Cube is still in it and did you see what he did to those to punks?
All of a sudden we see Chico rolling down the rampway. Right behind him is Crazy. Crazy picks up Chico and throws him in the ring and the bell sounds.
Joe: Looks like these two couldn’t wait to get into the ring.
Chico irish whips Crazy and delivers a perfect dropkick. Chico follows up with a spinning leg drop. The 5’6″ 220lb Chico then picks up Crazy and delivers a body slam, followed by a knee to the head. Chico then picks up and throws Crazy out of the ring.
Chico climbs to the top rope to deliver an elbow….but Crazy moves and Chico is hurt.
Joe: What a fast paced start to the match.
Chris: Shit, not anymore. Both Latinos are hurting.
Both men get to their feet and begin to exchange blows. The much taller Crazy gains the upper advantage and executes a perfect sidewalk slam. Crazy then begins to work Chico’s legs, obviously setting him up for his finisher, the Scorpion Death Lock. Crazy drags Chico to the ropes and begins to pummel Chico’s left leg.
Crazy turns to the crowd and raises his arms. Chico hobbles up to one leg.
Joe: This is bad for Chico. If he can’t do his high flying moves he will be in some serious trouble against the much larger Crazy.
Crazy nails Chico with a right hand and follows it up with a shin breaker. Crazy then locks in a standing toehold. Chico is writhing in pain on the mat. Finally Crazy releases the hold. He pulls Chico up to his feet and irish whips Chico. Chico ducks a clothesline attempt, slides under a big boot attempt and dropkicks Crazy in the knee.
Crazy falls to one knee. Chico, still hobbling, begins to work on Crazy’s leg.
Joe: So the tide has changed and its now Chico working the leg of Crazy. Oh look Chico is on the top rope……and delivers a devastating elbow to the knee of Crazy. The crowd is into this match.
Chico covers. 1…2…kick out by Crazy. Another cover. 1…2..kickout. One more time. 1…kick out by Crazy.
Chico slides out of the ring and grabs a ladder. He slides it into the ring. Chico executes a spinning leg drop to Crazy and positions the ladder on top of Crazy. Chico then climbs the top rope and signals to the crowd. They are going absolutely nuts.
Chico jumps off and delivers a shooting star press off the top rope onto the ladder. which is on top of Crazy!!
Joe: Chico put his body on the line with that move. He appears to have hurt himself also…wait here’s a cover…..1…..2……kick out barely by Crazy.
After the near fall Chico picks up the ladder and stands it up in front of the turnbuckle. Chico ascends to the top of the ladder and waits for Crazy to get up. Crazy slowly rises to his feet. Chico is about to take off when…….
Chris: Look it’s the corona guy. He just pushed the ladder…causing Chico to fall off the ladder and out of the ring.
Joe: I have no idea what’s going on with AJ. He just appeared out of the crowd.
AJ takes off thru the crowd again. Crazy, still hurting, slowly climbs to the outside where Chico is in some serious pain. Crazy picks up Chico and drives him headfirst into the ring post. Crazy then slides Chico into the ring. Crazy covers.1….2…….kick out by Chico.
Crazy slides out of the ring and grabs a table. He slides it into the ring. Crazy climbs back in and delivers a swift kick to the now busted up Chico. Crazy sets up the table in the middle of the ring. Crazy turns around and is met by a ladder to the face!!
Chico drops the ladder as he is too weak to capitalize on the move. Crazy is now busted open. Both men stagger to their feet. Crazy charges Chico who executes a drop toe hold right onto the ladder. Chico picks up the dazed Crazy and puts him on the table. Chico then sets up the ladder in the corner of the ring and ascends the ladder carefully…looking around the whole time for AJ.
Suddenly Crazy is too his feet. He runs over and before Chico can do anything Crazy has climbed the first few rungs of the ladder. He grabs Chico by the throat and delivers a choke slam off the ladder and thru the table!!
Joe: HOLY SHIT
Chris: Did you just say shit? You been smoking my shit?
Joe: BOTH MEN ARE LAID OUT.NEITHER ONE IS MOVING. WAIT CRAZY HAS DRAPED HIS ARM OVER CHICOS..
1…..2…..kick out by Chico
Chris: HOLY SHIT. How in the hell did he do that?
The crowd oohs and aahs over the near finish. Crazy gets slowly to his feet and slides out of the ring. He reenters the ring with a chair in hand. He pounds the mat with the chair…waiting for Chico to get up. Slowly and surely Chico rises to his feet only to be hit with the most devastating chair shot of the night!
Chico is busted open bad. Crazy covers. 1….2…Crazy pulls him up!
Joe: Why did he do that. Chico is out cold! Oh wait he has just locked in his finisher…the Scorpion Death Lock. Chico can’t even tap!
The ref realizing that Chico is knocked out calls for the bell.
Winner of the match…..Crazy!!!!!!
But Crazy refuses to let go of the hold. It takes 7 HOW officials to finally get Crazy to release the hold and get out of the ring. Crazy walks to the back bloody, and to a chorus of boos.
Joe: Well thank god order is restored. The two triple threat matches are complete now. In the first one it’s Jason Ice vs. Omar Rasheem vs. Ice Cube. In the other triple threat, it will be The Executioner vs. Kanyoner vs. Crazy. After this commercial break we will have our first triple threat match to decide the first finalist for the Hardcore Title!!
Who needs luck when you got Pot?
Jason Ice vs. Omar Rasheem vs. Ice Cube
Joe: Welcome back everyone to a sold out Gund Arena here in Cleveland Ohio. So far every match has ended with some kind of bizarre incident or interference. AJ has especially be active tonight.
Chris: Yeah he has been acting like he smoked the wrong shit. Somebody gonna whip that ass.
Joe: You might be right. But for now its time to get back to the action with our first triple threat match. The winner of this match will go on to the finals of the Hardcore Tournament to face the winner of the other triple threat match. This should be some exciting wrestling…and to think we haven’t even got to the title matches yet!
Jason Ice walks down to the ring with his left arm heavily bandaged.
Joe: Jason Ice is a true champion in my book for just wrestling right now. After that brutal body slam thru a flaming table, courtesy of The Crow, you wouldn’t expect anyone to wrestle. But hats off to the HOW security for putting of Jason Ice before he really did melt.
Omar Rasheem heads towards the ring on his infamous camel. Omar is receiving a mixed reaction from the Cleveland crowd. He hops off his camel and into the ring. Omar and Jason Ice exchange looks and await their other opponent.
Today was a good day pumps thru the PA as Ice Cube makes his way to the ring. Ice Cube is smiling and seems very confident.
Chris: During the commercial I found out that Dre gots to go to the hospital. So Cube is on his own now. But shit..CMOn..he gonna win.
Ice Cube enters the squared circle and the bell rings.
The three wrestlers are staring each other down. Suddenly the two Ice’s jump on Omar. A double irish whip, followed by a double clothesline sends Omar to the mat. Jason Ice delivers an elbow, followed by Ice Cube delivering a leg drop. Jason Ice picks up Omar and delivers a standing dropkick. Cube covers…1…2….count broke up by Jason Ice.
Cube jumps up and gets in the face of Jason. Suddenly a double clothesline by Omar sends the two to the mat. Omar waits for them to get up and delivers right hands to both wrestlers. He continues this until both wrestlers are down on the mat and the crowd is actually cheering a little.
Omar slides out of the ring and grabs two chairs. Jason Ice is the first to get up and is given a chair by Omar. Confused, Jason Ice takes the chair. Omar points to Ice Cube, and the give a double chair shot to the head of Ice Cube. Then Jason Ice nails Omar with the chair.
Joe: It’s ever man for themselves. But gosh did Omar set up Ice on that one.
Chris: Which Ice? Man let that towel head come over here and give me a chair..shit…
Omar covers Jason Ice. Broke up by a desperation dive by Ice Cube. Omar gets up and throws Ice Cube out of the ring. Omar then begins to work over Jason Ice with another chair shot…this one to the leg. Jason Ice writhes in pain as Omar raises his arms. The crowd boos.
Outside the ring Ice Cube is struggling to his feet. Suddenly Chris Tucker leaves the announce table and runs over to Ice Cube. Chris lights a roach and Ice Cube takes a big hit…smiles at Chris. and exhales. Chris then quickly runs back to the announce table.
Chris: Shit now my boy will be like Chronic Popeye. He’s lucky though…that was my hydro.
Back in the ring Omar has Jason Ice in a figure four. Jason is trying desperately to get to the ropes but Omar has him too far away to get there. Jason looks as though he is about to tap when Omar is hit in the back of the head with a brick from Ice Cube.
Ice Cube: that one is for Tuck. Like he would say. you just got knocked the fuck out!
Cube then covers..1…..2….a diving Jason Ice breaks up the cover.
Cube picks up Ice and irish whips him to the ropes and follows up with a clothesline that sends Jason Ice to the outside. Cube then focuses on Omar. Cube picks up Omar and delivers a body slam, followed by two elbow drops. Cube then climbs to the top rope. He nails a diving head butt to the heart of Omar. Cover. 1…….2…..kick out by Omar Rasheem. Cube stands up and bounces off the ropes but his feet are grabbed by Jason Ice from the outside.
Jason pulls Cube to the outside and stomps a mud hole in him. Jason is still a little dazed and is clutching his badly burned arm. Jason grabs a TV cable and begins to choke the life out of Cube. Jason releases the hold and then proceeds to grab the timekeeper’s bell. He waits for Cube to get up and then BOOM.
Jason busts open the former rapper with a clean shot to the head. Jason rolls Cube into the ring and covers. 1……2…..
Back in Black blasts over the PA. Lee Best is on the ramp with a mic in hand.
Lee Best: Jason , Jason , Jason. Don’t you remember our little deal? You aren’t allowed to even leave that ring once the bell rang. I don’t care if that ugly ass camel threw you out of the ring….we had a deal. And since you reneged on that deal….I have no other choice than to ban you from this match. C’mon get up here now…don’t make me send someone after you. Or would you rather sign that pink slip?
Jason Ice’s face is pure red. He has no choice but to leave the match. Slowly Jason walks up the ramp.
Lee Best: That’s right Jason…..get your ass back there. And oh hey Cube….hows Dolly doing??
It takes every ounce of his body not to hit Best, but Ice walks back to the back.
Lee Best: I am sorry for that interruption. please continue the match.
Best then walks back to the back. Joe: Oh my god. Just when Jason Ice had the match won. Rules are rules. but that is silly.
Chris: What is silly is what my boy Cube is doing in the ring.
A bloody Omar and a bloody Ice Cube are exchanging right hands. Finally Cube gets the upper hand when he drops down and punches Omar in the balls. Cube goes for the cover…..feet on the ropes…..1…….2……kick out by Omar.
Joe: That was a close one. Cube appears to be willing to do anything to get to that final match.
Omar is still struggling to his feet when Cube delivers a dropkick to the side of the head. Cube picks up Omar and slides him out of the ring. Cube slides out and picks up Omar. Cube irish whips….no reversed by Omar….and Cube goes flying into Omar’s camel.
Joe: I must have smoked some of your stuff…that is the first time I have seen a wrestler irish whipped into a camel.
Chris: That’s the closet you will see a brother to a camel, unless some gold to be found….CMON Cube get your ass up.
Omar is starting to shake out the cobwebs. He settles his camel down and then proceeds to Irish whip Cube into the steel steps knocking the top two steps free. Omar picks them up and drives them into Ice Cubes shoulder and back, Omar tosses the steps aside and rolls Cube back into the ring. Omar pushes Cube to the corner and delivers a whicked chop to the chest. The crowd gives the familiar cries of Whooo…in honor of Ric Flair. Omar delivers a series of chops.
Chris: Goddamn. He chopped Cube so hard even his chest turned red.
Cube falls to his knees holding his chest, screaming out in pain. Omar then picks up Cube and delivers a beautiful one handed stalling suplex. Omar pops up and looks to the crowd. The sold out Gun arena just gives him boos. Omar flips the crowd off and kicks Ice Cube into the gut. Cube is rolling around holding his stomach. Omar signals for his finisher. The Sand Storm.
Omar picks Cube up and irish whips him to the ropes…..Cube ducks the Sand Storm and counters with a flying elbow off the ropes.
Joe: What a great desperation move by Ice Cube. I thought for sure that it was over there.
Both men struggle to their feet to beat the 10 count. They begin to throw Rocky like punches at one another. Each mans face is bloody. With each punch blood flies off the face of each man. Suddenly Omar reaches into his trunks and quickly throws sand into the face of Cube. Cube grabs his eyes in pain and Omar delivers the Sand Storm(clothesline from hell).
Omar covers….1……2…..Chris Tucker jumped off the top rope and hit Omar with an elbow breaking up the count. Omar looks angrily at Chris as Chris runs out of the ring. Omar slides out of the ring and chases Chris around the ring. Omar rounds one corner and his met with a corona bottle to the head from none other than AJ.
Joe: What the hell is AJ’s motive here? What the hell is going on? Look, now AJ has disappeared into the crowd again. Omar is busted up badly.
Chris picks up Omar and rolls him into the ring. Being a hardcore match the ref cant do anything. Cube crawls over to Omar and covers…..1…….2……..3…
Ice Cube wins the match via pinfall.
Joe: Unbelievable I have seen it all now. But the bottom line is that somehow, someway, Ice Cube has made it to the finals of the Hardcore
tournament. We are going to another commercial break. Order must be restored!
Chris Tuckers new sidekick
Come back from commercial and we see two bodies lying on the floor. Standing over them is a smiling Lee Best and The Executioner with AJ sitting down in a chair behind them.
Lee Best: Well it appears to me that since these two aren’t able to compete…and their match is next, well Jack…you advance to the next round and will face Ice Cube for the Hardcore title. It must be your lucky day.
The Executioner: This isn’t how I wanted to win tonight.
Lee Best: Well I had nothing to do with it. Fang hadn’t signed his contract, and well….I don’t know anything about this. Do you AJ?
AJ: Shit, I didn’t see anything. I was just wanting to wish Jack here good luck. I saw this and called you. Didn’t see anyone coming or going either.
Lee Best: You see Jack. Not my fault that Kanyoner and Crazy are lying here on the ground knocked out. Shit, I even called for the medics. They should be here any sec. But since I got you here Jack lets go chat while AJ goes and wins the no.1 contender match.
(back to Joe and Chris)
Joe: What a development. So The Executioner will go straight to the Hardcore title match against Ice Cube later this evening. I don’t like it. Something smells here.
Chris: You talking about me? What can you smell the herb? It smells good don’t it.
Joe: Well anyway lets get on to our next match. AJ should be warmed up for this. with all the action he has had tonight.
AJ vs. Kronik
Have Another Drink on Me by AC/Dc blasts over the PA as AJ makes his way down to the ring. AJ has a corona in his hand and a big smile on his face. AJ steps into the ring and downs his corona. Wiping his mouth AJ motions for Kronik to come down the aisle. But there is no music. Aj gets on the mic.
AJ: Come on Kronik I know you are in the building. Well if you are not coming out I guess I win by……
CRACK. AJ gets nailed from behind by Kronik who snuck thru the crowd and slid into the ring while AJ had his back turned.
Joe: So AJ finally gets a taste of his own medicine.
Kronik is nailing AJ with vicious kicks to the gut. Kronik stops when he sees the mic lying on the ground beside AJ. Kronik picks up the mic.
Kronik: You aren’t so tough when you aren’t attacking people from behind. Well how does it feel to be royally fucked!!
Kronik nails AJ in the head with the mic. Kronik motions to the crowd. He’s ending this match now! Kronik irish whips Aj into the corner and charges with a hard clothesline, knocking the breath from AJ. Kronik steps up to the top rope and turns AJ around. With immense strength Kronik lifts AJ up and springs off the top rope executing a perfect KroniKle(power bomb off tope rope)
Joe: I can’t believe it this match is over.
The lights go out in the arena.
Joe: Not this again….anyone see the ring? What’s going on??
The lights come back on and Kronik is laid out. No one can bee seen.
Joe: It has to be The Executioner. Who else would help out AJ?? Who??
Kronik can be seen to be bleeding from the back of his head. AJ slowly works his way to his feet, then falls back to the mat. The KroniKle really put AJ in a bad way. AJ decides to crawl over to Kronik. He drapes his arm over Kronik. 1……2……kick out! Kronik barely lifted his shoulder off the mat in time. AJ pounds the mat in frustration. AJ rolls all the way out of the ring. He looks under the ring and finds what he is looking for.
Chris: Oh shit…he has a baseball bat.
Kronik is slowly making his way up to his feet as Aj rolls back into the ring with the baseball bat. AJ stumbles over and swings wildly at Kronik who ducks and manages to punch AJ in the balls…causing AJ to once again fall to the mat in pain.
Joe: Too many crotch shots tonight. I have no idea why you got involved out there like you did Chris.
Chris: Helping out a brother. it looks like these two could use a brother right now.
Both men make it to their feet and begin to exchange blows. Kronik gets the upper hand.
All of a sudden a man comes running down to the ring. Kronik gives AJ a ddt and prepares to fight the guy. The guy walks around the ring and picks up a mic.
Unknown: Whoa Kronik. Settle down. I am here to tell you who nailed you and Crow earlier when the lights went out. Don’t you want to know? I know this crowd does, don’t you?
The crowd cheers in their agreement. Kronik nods in agreement and motions for the man to tell him. The Man cautiously enters the ring and walks up to Kronik.
Unknown: You see Kronik I was hired here a few days ago. I was hired here to keep tabs on a guy…the guy that hit you over your head. I watched him plan, I watched him lie to people, and I watched him watching you. He wants your head Kronik. And he is here tonight to get it.
Kronik asks who is it?
The man motions to the referee to go get Kronik a mic. The ref turns to do so.
Unknown: You see Kronik I want the world to hear the words that come out of your mouth when I tell you that it was me….
The man kicks Kronik I the gut and picks him up and delivers a reverse Death Valley Driver. The crowd begins to boo loudly and the ref begins to call for the bell…
Back in Black blasts over the PA and Mr. Best is once again on the ramp.
Lee Best: Don’t even ring that bell or your job will be yours no longer. You understand me?
The ref nods in agreement.
Lee Best: Cleveland Ohio I would like to introduce you all to Acid. Acid is here to make sure things go according to how I see fit. So Acid please finish your job.
Acid picks up the now slow moving AJ and proceeds to give him the Acidic Drop. The same move he just nailed Kronik with. Acid then drags the unconscious Kronik over to AJ and puts one of Kroniks arms onto AJ.
Lee Best: You may make the three-count ref.
With Acid towering over him the ref makes the count 1…..2…..3.
Kronik wins the No. 1 contendership match.
Lee Best: You see Kronik, I wanted you to win. But you also need some sense knocked into you. So I will be expecting a thank you whenever you get up.
Back in Black pumps over the PA as Lee Best and Acid leave.
Joe: I can t believe it. I am not sure if my eyes are deceiving me or what.
Chris: Everyone smoking something tonight. Too much crazy ass shit going down.
Joe: I am not sure if I am ready for the next match. The first HOW title will be won next!
Joe Louis Arena