Mayhem: October 26th, 2009 (2009)

Weekly Show | 120 Min
Rating:
5/10
5

Show Transcript

Monday Night Mayhem
October 26th, 2009 – #HOW88
James A. Thodes Arena, Akron, OH

 

Now Airing on HOTv:

On a chilly October night in Akron, Ohio, the cameras inside the James A. Rhodes Arena become live, scanning the already fervent crowd that is ever-so-desperate for a chance to be seen on live television.

Self Esteem” roars across the speakers as the electric blue Mayhem banner crumbles away on the HOV. Suddenly, a loud EXPLOSION of blue pyro shoots out from the rafters, getting the fans amped up for a tremendously packed card that is full of HOW superstars.

Standing by at ringside is the Mayhem broadcast team of Chastity Gold and Rick Fantastic, who eagerly welcome us to the show after a productive and entertaining week of programming here on HOTv.

Chastity Gold: Ladies and Gentlemen… this is MONDAY NIGHT MAYHEM!

Much like the pyro, the Akron fans explode with cheers as the noise in the JAR becomes overwhelming for Chastity to continue. She pauses briefly to give the fans their moment and once the applause dies down a bit, she’s quick to introduce herself and her broadcast partner.

Chastity Gold: As always folks, I’m Chastity Gold sitting alongside Rick Fantastic… and Rick, what a show we have in store for everyone tonight!

Rick Fantastic: That’s right Chaz! I, for one, am pumped about Match 2 of the Best of Seven World title series between the champion, Aceldama and the challenger, Perfect Paul Paras. Last week, we saw the ENTIRE Mayhem roster brawl during Match 1, the Lumberjack match that saw Aceldama and Paras stand UNITED after the conclusion of their match!

Chastity Gold: You had to see it to believe it, folks! These two would be damned if they let ANYONE affect the outcome of this series, especially the Tag Team champions who took things to an all-time personal low, attacking their long-time friend, Triple P.

Rick Fantastic: Many have always considered Paul a member of the Family, including Mario himself, but as we approach ICONIC, its obvious things are changing around here.

Chastity Gold: If you would have told me 6 months ago that we’d see Triple P and Aceldama as the top-drawing faces here in HOW, I would’ve recommended that you visit a mental institution.

Rick Fantastic: Not to mention the fact that MIKE BEST has taken the reigns over on Turmoil! Lee Best and the Best Alliance are no more after Mikey incarcerated his own brother for years upon years of past crimes here in HOW.

Chastity Gold: High Octane Wrestling without the self-proclaimed ‘God of HOW’ is like peanut butter without jelly… like spaghetti without meatballs…

Rick Fantastic: …like my ex-wives without a support order?

Chastity Gold: Um… sure. There’s no telling how long Lee will be away from HOW, especially since Mike Best has taken the legal leverage over his brother ever since he re-appeared just before Rumble at the Rock 2. But my question is, what happens to Faze here on Mayhem?

As if on cue, Breaking Benjamin’s “Phase” echos over the loudspeaker, indicating the arrival of the General Manager.

Rick Fantastic: Looks like we’re about to find out!

Chastity Gold: Well last week, we all saw the GM APPLAUDING the World Champion and the #1 Contender after their hard fought match. And the big question is… why?

Dressed to perfection in a flawless grey Armani suit, Ryan Faze emerges from backstage with a microphone in hand. As if he expected it, he smiles at the ovation of boos he receives as he walks his way to the ring. He ascends the ring steps and pauses on the ring apron, looking out to the crowd as a serious look comes across his face.

Rick Fantastic: Faze has been unavailable for comment all week, so maybe he’ll shed some light on his recent actions ever since he left Triple P and Issac Slade for dead in the Dungeons of Alcatraz.

Chastity Gold: Rumors have been flying that he personally visited Lee Best in prison and was instructed by the Man himself to keep quiet until the show tonight.

Faze raises the microphone to his lips; the boos becoming louder and louder as he tries several times to speak but is cut off by the hostile Akron crowd. Frustration appears to set in for Faze, but finally, he interjects in an unexpectedly calm manner.

Faze: I know, I know. Go ahead and boo…

Chastity Gold: As they rightfully should!

Rick Fantastic: Shut up and let him speak for a minute before you get us BOTH fired.

The fans happily oblige and boo Faze, just as he requested. Faze smiles again and puts up his hand in an attempt to bring the crowd to a hush. Surprisingly, it works.

Faze: …I’ll be the first to admit I deserve it. And perhaps I should explain myself a bit because Lord knows everyone deserves an explanation after everything that’s happened over the past 5 months. You see… I haven’t been myself lately. I haven’t been myself ever since… ever since…

At this point, Faze is more than a little choked up. He fights back tears as the fans become dead silent as they watch him nearly break down before he finally is able to compose himself.

Faze: …ever since Sabby died.

Chastity Gold: For those of you just joining the program, Sabina Faze was the victim of a horrific accident that occurred in that very ring.

Rick Fantastic: Accident? Ryan’s sister was killed at the hands of his best friend, Issac Slade!

Chastity Gold: That was Issac’s girlfriend! She was the woman he loved for Christ’s sake!

Rick Fantastic: Look, whether Slade meant to hit her or not, it is something the GM has to live with every day of his life.

Faze: Now I’m sure all of you have lost loved ones and can sympathize with how it has affected me. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about her… think about the wonderful memories and heart-breaking struggles we shared together; memories as recent as mere days before her death. You all have been witness to my self-destruction, tolerated it as I lost myself in a world of drug abuse… turned against my colleagues, cost many superstars matches… I abused my power… I abandoned whatever friends I had left… and perhaps most importantly, I abandoned you… the fans.

Faze pauses briefly, saddened by how his actions have impacted everyone he just mentioned, before he continues.

Faze (pointing to his knee): It was hard enough having to end my wrestling career… but losing Sabby? That pushed me over the edge. And I’ll be honest… with the blood on his hands, I may NEVER be able to forgive Issac Slade, but it wasn’t until this week… until a meeting with Best that I was able to put a few things in perspective. Yes, the rumors are true… I met with Best… but it wasn’t Lee.

Rick Fantastic: Huh?!?

Chastity Gold: Well that means…

Faze: Upon the conclusion of Thursday Night Aceldama, I was summoned to take a red-eye out to Chicago for a meeting with Mike Best. Sure, I was hesitant at first, but I quickly found how clear and different his outlook is from his brother’s.

There’s a buzz over the crowd at this point, with everyone in attendance curious about Faze’s sudden change of heart.

Faze: Needless to say, I was surprised by his honesty, motivated by his goals to make HOW a better place, and thankful for his forgiveness and willingness to look past my prior faults and move forward on a united front to achieve one goal…

Ryan pauses briefly for obvious dramatic effect.

Faze: PUT THE FOCUS BACK ON THE WRESTLERS AND YOU… THE HARD-WORKING, DIE-HARD FANS OF HIGH OCTANE WRESTLING!!!

The “JAR” erupts with a BOOM as the fans rise to their feet, not to heckle Faze, but to cheer him as they believe in what he is telling them.

Chastity Gold: Rick, are my ears deceiving me or is this ovation reminiscent of the “Faze of HOW” era in HOW?!?

Rick Fantastic: I don’t know WHAT to think, to be completely honest.

Chastity Gold: Well it appears that Faze has bought into the ideals of Lee’s own brother, Mike Best!

Rick Fantastic: Which won’t make Lee a happy camper, that’s for sure. But can Faze be trusted? That’s the REAL question you have to ask yourself.

Once again, Faze quiets the crowd that has started a faintly heard “Faze of HOW” chant by holding up his palm.

Faze: I’ve said it before and preached it ‘til I was blue in the face when I was a wrestler here in HOW, but it’s because of YOU GUYS that we’re even standing here today. It’s because of YOU GUYS that those wrestlers in the back risk their lives each and every week. It’s because of YOU GUYS that they sacrifice their own blood, sweat, and tears without even thinking twice. So… to each and every one of you fans out there… and to each and every one of you wrestlers in the back… everyone from David Black, to Jason Midnight… to even Shane Reynolds, and ESPECIALLY Perfect Paul Paras…

I AM SORRY.

Whether or not you choose to forgive me for my faults is your choice, but from now on, Monday Night Mayhem will be a land of fair and equal opportunity. My office will have an “Open Door” policy… and it’s my PROMISE to you, wrestlers and fans alike, to make decisions based on the good of the company as a WHOLE. No longer will I selfishly walk those hallways backstage strictly looking out for my best interest. If you ask me, enough is enough… and it’s time for a change!

Chastity Gold: Holy cow! Never would I have expected such a drastic change of heart in our General Manager! Is it wrong to say that I actually believe in our General Manager?

Rick Fantastic: I don’t buy it. I don’t buy it even for a minute! You watch, Chaz! At ICONIC, you’ll be eating those words.

Faze points out to all the fans with a genuine smile and a confident nod before he tosses the microphone to a ring attendant outside the ring.

Chastity Gold: I suppose we’ll find out… but for right now, I’m optimistic about the direction that both Mayhem AND Turmoil are headed as we move forward towards ICONIC. Don’t go away folks! We’re just getting started here on Monday Night Mayhem!

 


No HOR this week, but be sure to visit hotv.howrestling.com for an archive of past shows!

 

Black Mamba vs. Rush Marconi
Singles Match

Rick Fantastic: Hello and welcome back! Mack La Bamba and Mushy Macaroni are already out in the ring so without further adieu…

Chastity Gold: Don’t quote me on this, Rick, but I think you just MIGHT have got their names wrong there.

The bell rings and Mamba moves straight into a headlock on Marconi, but the heavier man pushes him away and into the ropes, catching him with a midsection kick as he bounces back. Mamba goes down but into a roll and takes Marconi by surprise with a neckbreaker from behind. Marconi rolls rapidly away so that Black Mamba can’t stomp on him and is back on his feet in time to duck a wild right hand, moving behind Mamba and tieing up. Mamba however moves right around behind Marconi, thrusting a knee into his kidneys. Rush cries out and collapses to his knees.

Rick Fantastic: Macaroni and kidney pie? Yes please!

Black Mamba applies a sleeper hold but it’s easily powered out of by Marconi.

Chastity Gold: It’s like he just didn’t put the effort in there. Black Mamba has the talent, but not the application just yet.

Marconi flicks a leg into the midsection. Mamba catches hold of it and Marconi attempts an enziguri, but it’s easily telegraphed and Mamba catches the second leg too, tumbling back and sending Marconi flying into the turnbuckle!

Chastity Gold: Monkey flip!

Rick Fantastic: Schoolboy error from Mercury there. I gotta tell you, Samba has a good opportunity to make something last.

Black Mamba sends Marconi into the ropes then runs to the opposite set, leaping onto the top rope and backflipping — but Rush Marconi ducks beneath him and Black Mamba lands flat on his face!

Chastity Gold: Black Mamba attempted the Hooked Fang but misjudged his leap there!

Marconi grins triumphantly and drags a dazed Mamba to his feet.

Rick Fantastic: Oh dear. He won’t be dancing the Samba tonight.

Marconi delivers his hurricanrana driver finisher!

Chastity Gold: That’s — uh, “Whacked!”

Rick Fantastic: What a, eh, awesome name for a move.

Mamba is laid flat out and Marconi casually lays a hand on his chest.

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

Chastity Gold: Rush Marconi wins this opening match here on Mayhem!

Kimber Marshall: Here is your winner in 2:00… RUSH MARCONI!!!

Having done his business for the night, Marconi quickly slides out of the ring and heads to the back.

 

Doctor, Doctor

Following the opening match, the fans at ringside are resonating with palpable anticipation and excitement for further High Octane action, and before the ring can even be cleared for the other upcoming matches of the night, they receive it courtesy of the HOV coming to life. Upon the screen, however, is not something from tonight’s show, but instead of the last edition of Turmoil:

Max lies in the middle of the ring, as Graystone stirs and starts to get up. He crawls his way over to the cage door and requests Boettcher to open the door. Boettcher obliges and opens the door. Graystone slowly crawls over and makes his top half out of the ring.

THWACK!

Joe Hoffman: What the hell!?

The cameraman slams the cage into Graystone’s face, sending Graystone reeling back into the ring with a second cut bleeding out… this one even bigger than the first, as blood just pours out of Graystone’s head like a faucet.

Benny Newell: I think I’m going to get sick.

Joe is speechless as the cameras turn to the cameraman who just slammed the door on Graystone’s head. The cameraman drops the camera and pulls of his hat to reveal….

Joe Hoffman: Shane Reynolds!

Benny Newell: WHAT THE HELL!? How did he get in here!?

Kael manages to make it to his feet, favoring his elbow. He walks over and grabs Graystone’s arm and handcuffs him to the cage. Shane moves around to the side of the cage to Graystone with a smile on his face. Suddenly the EPU come storming down to the ring, with Mike Best at the top of the ramp yelling. Shane turns around and notices the EPU, and slowly drops down to his knees and puts his hands on top of his head. The EPU swarm him, push him down to the ground and put handcuffs on him.

Benny Newell: Get his ass out of here!

Kael, noticing this is his opportunity, calls for the door to be opened. Boettcher opens the door. Kael, holding his elbow in pain, stumbles over to the door and tumbles himself through the ropes. Kael falls down on his back and both feet hit the floor.

DING DING DING!

Bryan McVay: WINNER OF THE BOUT IN 13 MINUTES AND 43 SECONDS AND NEW ICON CHAMPION… MAX KAEL!!!!

Joe Hoffman: My God, he’s done it!

The EPU cart Shane to the back, as the camera focuses in on Graystone who is passed out from the blood loss. Boettcher runs over the timekeeper, grabs the ICON Championship, and rushes back over to greet and congratulate Max Kael. Kael stands up and is awarded the ICON Title.

Benny Newell: All thanks to that no good Shane Reynolds! Now HOW must endure another week of Max Kael as a champion! Lee’s got to be rolling in anger wherever he is.

Joe Hoffman: This can’t sit well with Lee Best…once he finds out that is…

Max points to the timekeeper, and then makes a signaling motion as if to say “up…” The timekeeper says something into his headset… and then the cage starts to raise.

Joe Hoffman: Wait a damn minute! Graystone’s handcuffed to that cage.

The cage begins to rise, Graystone and all… as the former ICON Champion dangles limp from his wrist. The cage soars up, higher and higher until Graystone is off the canvas and dangling in the air. Higher and higher… Max Kael slides into the ring, and stands.

The camera cuts to a far away shot of Graystone dangling in the air, handcuffed to the steel cage as Max slowly raises the ICON Title into the air as the crowd goes nuts in a frenzy of picture taking..

As the dramatic and somewhat shocking footage ends, the live feed cut to a shot of the announce table, and more specifically the faces of Mayhem announcers, Chastity Gold and Rick Fantastic.

Rick Fantastic: Well, ladies and gentlemen, due to the events of that match, Graystone is not scheduled to be here, tonight.

Chastity Gold: The updates on his condition have been few and far between, but we have just received word that this morning a camera crew was flown out, by special request, to the hospital where Graystone is recuperating. So hopefully we will be able to bring those updates to you now.

The HOV comes to life once again, this time with the added bonus of an ‘Earlier this Morning’ tag located in the bottom right hand corner.

The smell, although those watching couldn’t smell it, was one that all people had come to experience at one time or another throughout the course of their lives. The heavily sanitized smell of cleaning products and disinfectant. It covered the white walls and the equally white floors upon which heavy black boots fell as Shane Reynolds made his way along the corridor, that very smell now burning in his nostrils.

Rick Fantastic: Wait a minute! I thought this was a Graystone update?

He exclaims, curiously, over the footage as it continues to roll. The camera following Shane Reynolds onwards.

Shane: Mister Graystone had an arm in a cast, cast, cast….

He sang to himself, once again drawing curious looks from those he passed. Looks a lot more curious this time due to the fact he had no flowers to hand out and the fact that he was wearing a white doctor’s coat and hand a plastic toy stethoscope hanging around his neck. An ensemble completely ill-fitting to a man with dirt and mud and sweat, courtesy of his ‘practice’, clinging to his face and hair, which itself stuck out wildly from beneath a top hat.

Shane: So he called for the doctor to come fast, fast, fast.

Turning a corner, Shane’s eyes looked on a door up ahead, the last one at the end of the corridor. Picking up speed, Shane strode quickly towards it.

Shane: And the doctor came…with his bag and his hat.

Shane’s arm went up in the air, his left one first, revealing a typical doctor’s bag which he had stolen from the reception area – although he would say finder’s keepers and that it was just laying there. And then his right, gripping the top hat, he lifted it off and bowed his head slightly to nobody in particular, before putting it back again.

Shane: And he knocked at the door with a rat-a-tat-tat!

Shane raised his free hand up to the door, clenched it into a fist….and punched it straight in and marched into the door, prompting visitors to leap from their seats in the sudden surprise of the door crashing open and Shane’s loud exclaimation.

Shane: The doctor is in the house!

Shane met none or responded to any of their gazes, however, and merely zeroed in on Graystone, who was laying in a hospital bed at the far end of the ward. Marching straight over, Shane smiled down at him and picked up the chart from the end of the bed. His eyes moved back and forth across the page before he dropped it nonchalantly onto the floor.

Shane: Tsk, Tsk. You are in a bad way, aren’t you?

Shane said, as he moved around to the side of the bed and kicked the chair out of his way. His eyes were drawn to the arm Graystone had been hung by, which was now in a cast. They remained locked onto it, even as he leaned in and held his lips a few inches from Graystone’s ear.

Shane: Don’t worry, though. I have just the prescribed remedy that’ll see you up and about swinging the nine iron in no time.

He pulled back and dropped the doctor’s bag on the table beside the bed, uncaringly knocking over a glass of water. He reached inside and began pulling out all manner of things: notes, a book of empty prescriptions, a pair of glasses and so on. All of them he dropped randomly on the floor. All until he found what he was looking for.

Shane: I recommend… amputation!!

Shane turned back to Graystone and then back to the scalpel held in his fingetips.

Shane: It may take a while, but I’m sure it’ll be worth it.

He lunged forward suddenly, only faintly hearing a few screams of panic from around him. The scapel touched down on the skin of Graystone’s shoulder…..but then was pulled away, as Shane himself was gripped by three sets of strong hands and pulled away from the bed and across the ward back towards the corridor.

Shane: Oh come on! Not again! Can’t I just have a few more minutes!?

Nobody responded, unless you count the fact Graystone’s eyes opened and stared malevolently towards Shane, who was still within a small enough distance to return the gaze.

Shane: Ahh! You’re awake! HURRAH! It’s a miracle.

He yelled, disturbing further patients to awake from their recuperating slumbers as the hospital security continued to drag him towards the door.

Shane: I told you I would take the ICON championship away from you and put it in more deserving hands. Even if it was Maxmillian Kael’s. I had hoped to take even more away today, but alas, it seems you’ll have to wait and I’ll have to punish Kirsta first. Speaking of which, I better be dashing off anyway. Don’t wanna be late for that! Maybe I’ll see you there.

The doors slammed open as the horde of guards drove their backs into it and dragged Shane out into the corridor.

Shane: But, if not, I promise I’ll visit you again, as very soon as I can!!

Chastity Gold: I can only imagine what Shane Reynolds and Graystone are going to do to each other at ICONIC… one of them will be BURIED ALIVE and from the looks of it, without remorse!

Rick Fantastic: Please, for the sake of all… do not… I repeat, DO NOT authorize Dr. Shane Reynolds a license to practice. Stay tuned folks, we’ll be right back!

 

Shit! I forgot the jumbo sized eggs…

Back from the High Octane Fighting Championship ad, we shift gears drastically as the camera focuses in on the two main stars of the Egg Bandits. The crowd pops with cheers as both men, dressed in full ring gear, wander around the backstage area. It’s only a few minutes until they take center stage and have a chance to extract some vengeance after last week’s post match proceedings. Mr. Cool kicks us off…

So where the hell are these guys? I’m starting to get sick and tired of this shit. Plus, our window of opportunity is starting run out. I told you we should have just waited for them to get announced. Would have saved us so much more time, and I would have been able to get a least three more rips in.”

You’re high enough. It’s possible you were right though. Maybe they heard we were looking for them. I too would be running scared if I heard the horrible news that I was lucky enough to make the Bandits Top 5 Most Wanted List. ”

Point well taken Doozer, and how nice of you to tell Cancer he was right. That’s a big step in the right direction in the rocky relationship these two gentleman share.

Shit, I forgot the jumbo sized eggs…”

You ass. Screw it; we’ll save them for after the match. It will be better this way. Everyone will see us as we show the rest of the world, you mess with the Bandits… you get a double order of scrambled all of your face!”

The Egg Bandits are out for bacon. Look out Brotherly Bastards of the Beast.

Is that them?”

Cancer asks, as he points at two men. Small men. Midgets. Dressed liked wildeBEASTS. Not a bad Halloween costume. Still, absolutely no clue as to why, two midget Hilda Beats are backstage. Maybe there here in case the Beasts don’t show, maybe there here in case they do show, then run from the ring, trembling in fear as The Bandits await their eggy retribution.

Nah that ain‘t them. They look too imposing to be BeastMEN. Still don’t know who the hell they are though. Maybe we should egg them. That way, they’ll know who we are at least. Sometimes you got to be able to take that leap of faith.”

Wait, there they are! Over yonder… “

Yonder? Okay, COOL. But that isn’t them either. That’s a vending machine. Full of condoms. Twenty-Five cents each.

Hey, you need to chill back on smoking so much before a match. That’s a damn vending machine. Jiles, you crazy bastard.“

Scratching his head, CCJ manages to get out an…

OH….”

Not to say that trying wrestle that BEAST of a Condom vending machine, which is somehow conveniently located in the arena of a college campus, wouldn’t be more challenging then the two putzes who in mere minutes get…”

Cancer finishes…

A chance to touch COOL.”

Doozer, a bit peeved that Cancer has taken the liberty to finish his sentence…

A chance to get abused!”

Both men, now facing each other, begin to measure whose dick is bigger. Cancer, firing back…

A chance to ride the TIDAL wave that has been engulfing the sport of wrestling…”

Doozer then…

A chance to walk in the shadow of the man, the myth, the legend…”

Cancer, once again finishes…

The… eh, Mr. COOL!”

Doozer and Jiles begin to push and shove one another. Infants. This is EXACTLY why Whammy needs to be around at all times. Damn Bandits, once again hammering in the fact that you don’t need to a cohesive tag team in order to beat up a vending machine.

Or wildeBEASTS Midgets.

Not that they did… but they could, and would, if egged on enough.

Thankfully, it’s about that time we cut away to the LIVE feed of the Best Arena basement, where Monday Night Mayhem will televise its first-ever High Octane Fighting Championship bout.

Rick Fantastic: Ha ha! Those guys are egg-ceptional! Get it?

Chastity Gold: ::sigh:: It’s going to be a long night, isn’t it?

Rick Fantastic: Guess I shouldn’t have drank all that Red Bull before the show…

Chastity Gold: Well, we’ll see the Egg Bandits later in the show as they prepare to take on the Brothers of the Beast in a match that could solidify either team as the top contenders to the Maurako Family’s Tag Team titles. But for now… let’s shift our attention to the HOV, where Rick “Even” Stevens is standing by!

 

Joseph Gregory vs. 187
HOFC Match

As always, referee Rick Stevens is ready for action as both Joseph Gregory and 187 are in their corners of the mat and we see Turmoil ring announcer Bryan McVay standing in the middle.

Rick Fantastic: We’re going to see Joseph Gregory make his HOFC debut against the debuting and oddly named 187 in what should be a very good bout.

Chastity Gold: Well let’s not waste anymore time then! It’s time for a special treat here on Mayhem as the winner of this 1st Round HOFC tournament match will take on the winner of Trip Eisen and Davotek! I hear they are ready in Chicago… take it away Bryan!

Bryan McVay: The following is a first round bout in the HOFC number one contenders tournament and is scheduled for 3, three minutes round. First in the blue corner, weighing in tonight at 225 pounds and hailing from Plant City, Florida…..Joseph Gregory!

Gregory just stands there staring at his opponent as the silence in the Best Arena basement is evident.

Bryan McVay: And in the red corner, weighing in tonight at 224 pounds and hailing from Chicago, Illinois….1….8…..7!

You can imagine there’d be cheers for the hometown boy if there were any fans in attendance as we see 187 raise his arms up in the air in an effort to rile his opponent. McVay walks off the mat as Stevens calls both men to the center of the mat to give them a few last minute rule reminders as he then calls for the bell to get the first round under way.

Chastity Gold: Here we go, HOFC on Mayhem for the very first time!

Both men start very cautious, you can see Gregory trying to get a feel for 187, who he has never seen fight before. He throws a couple test jabs that don’t connect to see if 187 will show his hand, but doesn’t get much from him until 187 just rushes Gregory and catches his off guard as he tackles into the ground and starts throwing punches as Gregory now on his back trying to block and defend them.

Chastity Gold: 187 with a very unorthodox fighting style that was not expected at all by Gregory.

Rick Fantastic: Gregory will now have to work hard to fight back from this.

Gregory is able to grab both arms of 187 and uses a head butt to weaken 187 and throw him off him.

Chastity Gold: Illegal in the UFC, but just another move in HOFC.

Gregory now goes on the offensive as is able to apply an armbar submission on 187 as he starts wrenching on the arm. 187 tries to free himself and eventually does as Gregory didn’t have the perfect leverage. 187 gets back to his feet and gets caught with a hard jab and the kick combo which has him stumble back, but he keeps on his feet. Gregory continues the pressure and goes for another jab, but 187 ducks it and connects with a hard punch of his own which sends Gregory back a step, but he comes back and land a quick right, left jab combo which knocks 187 down to the mat.

Chastity Gold: Knock down by Gregory, but 187 just looks to be stunned a bit!

Rick Fantastic: Gregory looking to finish this match off…

With 187 on the mat, Gregory grabs one of the legs, but 187 rolls through, Ghetto Stomps his opponent, then locks in a Half Boston Crab submission! 187 pulls back, contorting the spine of Joseph Gregory who winces in pain as he is just trying to hold on for a few more seconds.

DING ~ DING ~ DING!

The bell rings and Rick Stevens quickly breaks up the submission hold as a disappointed 187 is instructed back to his corner after being the victim of the clock. Joseph Gregory stands up as well, holding his back.

Rick Fantastic: We almost saw the bout end right there, but round 1 came to an end before 187 could make Joseph Gregory tap out!

Chastity Gold: The damage may have already been done to the back of Joseph Gregory as 187 really had that hold locked in.

Rick Fantastic: Well looks like they are ready for round 2, so let’s see what will happen.

Stevens calls for the bell to get Round 2 underway and Joseph Gregory appears to have a small limp after the last submission. 187 charges his opponent with a wild jab, which Gregory is able to duck, then counter with a hard uppercut! 187 is dazed as Joseph Gregory spins around and hits a spinning heel kick to the jaw that knocks his opponent straight down to the ground! Referee Rick Stevens comes in to check on 187 and quickly waves his arms calling an end to the match.

DING ~ DING ~ DING!

Chastity Gold: And that is it! What a kick by Gregory!!

Rick Fantastic: How quickly things can turn the table as Joseph Gregory nearly took 187’s head clear off.

Bryan McVay: The winner of this match by knockout at 32 seconds of the second round… JOSEPH GREGORY!!!

Chastity Gold: Joseph Gregory impresses with his first-ever HOFC victory and will now await Trip Eisen or Davotek in the 2nd Round! Stay tuned, as we’ll be right back after this!

Stevens checks on 187 and Gregory briefly celebrates before the camera quickly cuts away to commercial.

 


Which one of these next two teams can step up and challenge the Maurakos??

 

Brothers of the Beast vs. The Egg Bandits
Tag Team Match

As Mayhem returns from commercial, the fans are treated to the sound of a roaring dragon followed by the eruption of flames at the entrance stage as “Through the Fire and Flames” by Dragonforce hits the speakers. The Brothers of the Beast appear, walking through the flame pyrotechnic display to a mixed reaction from the fans who still don’t know quite what to make of the tag team.

Kimber Marshall: Introducing first, at a combined weight of 614 pounds… THE BROTHERS OF THE BEAST!

Chastity Gold: Well it looks like Jacob Morgan and Tyson Ross are without Jason Midnight, but they look to be all business tonight.

The BOTB hit the ring and their attention focuses on the entrance ramp as the Egg Bandits music hits and Mr. Cool and Doozer appear at the entrance stage with a frying pan in one hand and a carton of eggs in the other. Following in tow of the pair is the new signee of HOW, Dawn McGill.

Kimber Marshall: And their opponents, being accompanied to the ring by Dawn McGill and weighing in at a combined weight of 505 pounds… THE EGG BANDITS!

The crowd pops at the entertaining fan favorites as they make their way to the ring with their manager following behind. Both teams are checked for weapons by Romeo Ward before they’re sent to their corners and both teams settle on who should start the match. Once the teams are in place and ready to begin, Romeo Ward calls for the bell to start the match.

DING ~ DING ~ DING!

Rick Fantastic: The Brothers of the Beast can’t be too happy about what we saw earlier from the Egg Bandits.

Tyson Ross starts the match against Doozer and the two men quickly tie up. There are a few heated moments as the two men seem to be on mostly equal footing. Ross gets the upper hand with sudden DDT that plants Doozer and allows him to get the tag to Jacob Morgan. But the big man doesn’t get much of a chance to get in the ring as Doozer has gotten back to his feet and is quick to meet Morgan between the ropes. Doozer keeps the big man pinned between the ropes with some quick fists but soon Morgan uses his power to push Doozer off and to the mat with one hand. With that separation, the 7-footer finally manages to get into the ring and the match dynamics change quickly.

Rick Fantastic: You know, Chaz, we’ve talked alot about how big and powerful Jason Midnight is…

Chastity Gold: And intimidating…

Rick Fantastic: And intimidating. But Jacob Morgan is bigger and powerfuler.

Chastity Gold: Ahem… um, powerfuler is not a word, Rick. Though, you’re right about that even though Morgan seems to be the more gentler giant of the two.

Rick Fantastic: The key word there Chaz… GIANT.

Inside the ring, Morgan has been showcasing his dominance with series of elbow shots to the side of Doozer’s head. He follows the blows up by catching him by the back of the head and flinging him half way across the ring. Powering his opponent up by his throat, Morgan sends him back to the mat with the double handed choke slam. A moment’s distraction as Dawn McGill interjects herself into the match to get the referee’s attention. With the distraction, Mr. Cool takes the opportunity to throw an egg at the back of the head of Morgan. The crowd roars at the egging of Morgan who turns his attention from Doozer to Mr. Cool. Closing the distance with a few massive steps, the hands of Morgan are around the throat of Mr. Cool in a moment. The big man snaps Mr. Cool over his head by throat with an overhead choke toss that catches the attention of Romeo Ward. Returning to the action in the ring, Ward doesn’t see as Dawn McGill once more makes her presence felt in the match by grabbing the leg of Tyson Ross and pulling him off the apron and nailing her 4″ stilettos into the crotch of Tyson Ross, who doubles over in pain.

The numbers game has Morgan at a disadvantage and Romeo Ward admonishes Mr. Cool and directs him to get back to his corner. The Egg Bandits ignore him and go to deliver their double boot super duper crotch kick to Morgan to end the match but Morgan comes to life and puts both men down with a double chokeslam!

Chastity Gold: HUGE CHOKESLAM FROM MORGAN!

After laying both men flat, he roars and lifts both fists into the air. He asserts his power over his opponents by keeping them grounded with rough tosses every time one of them stirs and begins to rise. Romeo Ward interjects himself between the men and tells Morgan to let Mr. Cool get back to his corner which Morgan obliges, only to be drilled in the back of the head by Doozer and sent stumbling into his corner and crashing against the freshly recovered Tyson Ross. The referee signals that the contact counts as a tag, but apparently, neither Mr. Cool nor Doozer realize it as they catch Morgan with a double DDT. Doozer goes for the pin, but Ward doesn’t drop for the count which has a confused Doozer rising to question the referee, only to be hit with a bulldog out of nowhere by Tyson Ross.

Rick Fantastic: Had they paid attention, the Egg Bandits could’ve had it right there!

With Doozer down, Ross is on Mr. Cool before the man has a chance to really know what hit him. Luckily, Ward steps in between the two, thus distracting Ross, who begins arguing with the referee much like Doozer just did.

This allows CCJ to shake off the dust, sneak into the ring, and kicks Jacob Morgan out of the ring before assisting his own partner to his feet. Ross catches this out of the corner of his eye and shoves Romeo out of the way, but is met with a move the Egg Bandits like to call the Eggcracker!

Chastity Gold: DOUBLE BRAINBUSTER!

On the outside, McGill ensures that Morgan is not a factor and proceeds to SMACK him with a frying pan that lays him out cold.

Rick Fantastic: OH! He’s not getting up from that one!

Cancer Jiles wins the game of Rock, Paper, Scissors between himself and his partner, much to Doozer’s disappointment. Mr. Cool makes the proper tag, and hooks the leg of Tyson Ross.

ONE!

TWO!!

THREE!!!

DING ~ DING ~ DING!

Kimber Marshall: Here are your winners in 7:33… THE EGG BANDITS!!!

As she stands over Jacob Morgan, Dawn McGill hands the Egg Bandit’s frying pan to a ringside fan, who holds the hunk of metal up and cheers, along with everyone else, as he sees himself on the HOV. The cameras focus on the rejoicing fan as he holds onto a piece of HOW history, cheering maniacally for the fan favorites.

Chastity Gold: Defining victory by the Egg Bandits, Rick! Tell me… are THEY the team to challenge the Maurakos for the Tag Team titles?

Rick Fantastic: They bigger question is… will they get their chance at the Lethal Lottery? Or will they have to wait until ICONIC to get their hands on the champions?

The cameras catch the Egg Bandits celebrating their victory as they walk up the ramp towards the back before the cameras cut elsewhere.

 

Sayonara. Motherfucker.

The cameras cut to the backstage area where Tim Shipley and Roxie are in the midst of a conversation when David Black is seen walking towards them.

David Black: Well…

Black looks Roxie up and down before turning his attention to Shipley as Roxie rolls her eyes.

David Black: If it isn’t Tim Shipley himself…and his whore.

Black smirks as Shipley takes a step towards Black and getting face to face with him.

David Black: You certainly managed to talk yourself up quite well last week…question is; do you have the guts to do it again this week to my face?

Before Shipley has a chance to respond, Roxie steps between the men and calmly interjects.

Roxie: You know what I want to do to your face, David?

Black smiles broadly.

David Black: I can only imagine.

Roxie is unimpressed.

Roxie: You don’t need to imagine. I’ll show you.

She draws out her arm and extends a slender middle finger right in Black’s face. The LSD champion doesn’t flinch, and Roxie holds her hand there, her red-painted talon millimetres from his unblinking eye.

Roxie: You were saying?

After a couple of intense seconds of silence, David starts laughing.

David Black: Roxie is it?

Roxie lowers her hand and gives a slight nod.

David Black: Well I apologize, it seems that I was mistaken. I thought it was Timmy Shipley and his whore, when infact it was Roxie and HER whore, Tim Shipley.

Black laughs. Roxie keeps her finger in his face as Shipley shrugs.

Tim Shipley: Keep working on those verbal reasoning skills, champ. You’ll need them for the job centre soon enough, once I expose that LSD title for what it is… papering over the cracks of… mediocrity.

Black flinches and slaps Roxie’s arm out of the way, stepping towards Shipley with heat now in his demeanour.

David Black: The only thing you are gonna expose tonight is your own weakness and your ignorance of that weakness!

There is a moment of silence as Black and Shipley stare each other down.

David Black: You have chosen the self-destructive path of challenging me to a no holds barred match. I know you think that you’re gonna use this match to get ahead here, but what you are going to learn tonight is that sometimes you actually do get exactly what you want…only to realize that you unknowingly had wished for your own destruction.

Tim Shipley: Big words Black! Keep it up and maybe I’ll teach you one with four syllables. Like… “hypocrisy”.

Roxie: And, uh, “sayonara”. “Motherfucker”.

She grabs Shipley’s hand and pulls him past David Black, stalking determinedly down the corridor. Shipley looks around at the LSD Champion and flashes him a beaming smile. David Black watches them go with a look of contempt on his face. Black keeps his eyes locked on the two until they disappear around the corner, he then takes off in the opposite direction as the cameras cut away to commercial.

 


Hot bitches that drink Budweiser beer… nothing better!

 

Little Sister?

Back live, we open up in the parking lot area of The JAR as a non-descript black car pulls into the arena. Jacob Morgan and Tyson Ross are seen waiting nearby as the driver gets out of the car and the camera zooms in on Jason Midnight! Midnight is on the phone at the moment it seems and holds up a finger to signal for his partners to wait as he speaks.

Midnight: Yes.. Yes… Ok.. Great. Ok.

Midnight hangs up and slips the phone into a pocket just in time for a familiar but long lost face to make his appearance! Steve Jared, the personal interviewer of Jason Midnight, trudges into the camera view with a microphone as Jacob and Tyson fall into step behind Midnight as he leads the way.

Steve: Now, Midnight, can you tell the fans why you were on the phone and why you weren’t here for the match earlier?

Midnight: Securing an opportunity,, Steve, m’boy. But lets not dwell on that. Looking forward is my policy. So let’s discuss something of importance…

Steve: The Lethal Lottery?

Midnight: Great! So. In a week.. two weeks? Right! Ok. So in two weeks when Turmoil returns.. Aceldama returns? Whatever! Ok. So when the other show returns it will be hosting a Lethal Lottery! Which for fans who don’t know is this thing where you don’t know who you’re facing and you go in against an unknown opponent.

Steve: Right and how does it feel not to know who you’ll be facing in the-

Midnight: I wasn’t done talking. Don’t interrupt, Steve. So, the tag teams are fortunate. We know that we will either be facing the Maurako Family for the titles. Or, alternatively, the Egg Bandits or Twisted Reality and a randomly generated tag team from the list of other singles competitors in a triple threat match. So the air of mystery is greatly diminished.

Jacob: Yeah. We’re going in with the knowledge of the prizes we might be getting and either way you look at it, it’s a shot at the title. Either now or at ICONIC. There’s only two real threats in either match. The randomly generated tag team… and the Maurako Family.

Midnight: And not to mention.. I have a secret… but I won’t tell. And a surprise… for the Maurakos. Hey Mariooooooooooooo! I know how much you like to hit women and all. So… I contacted your opponent for tonight and she and I got to talking.. And guess what? We decided that the Brothers of the Beast will be at ringside…. IN THE CORNER OF ERITES KALLISTEN! So bring the Family… and we’ll bring ours… because the Brothers of the Beast fear NO MAN, MONSTER OR GOD!

The Brothers of the beast push past the cameraman whose been trying to keep in front of them this entire time and the camera is quick to watch them pass as they head off on their way to join the match that is set to start in just a few short moments.

 

Mario Maurako vs. Erites Kallisten
Singles Match

The cameras cut back to the ring, where Kimber Marshall is standing with microphone in hand.

Kimber Marshall: The following match is set for one fall. Introducing first, weighing in at 260lbs, and being accompanied to the ring by the Marauko family… MARIO MARAUKO!

“Hunt You Down” by Saliva is playing over the PA as the Marauko family, led by Mario, makes their way to the ring with a confident approach. As they approach ringside young Mosé jumps up onto the apron, and holds the top and middle ropes open. The elder Marauko walks up the steps, and enters between the ropes. Mosé keeps the ropes held open as Mario and Martino enter the ring as well before entering himself. Frank Tsonga checks Mario for weapons.

Kimber Marshall: His opponent weighing in at 130lbs… ERITES KALLISTEN!

The music has already changed to “She’s a Rebel” by Green Day as Erites Kallisten makes her way down the entrance ramp at a run, and stops midway. She rocks out a bit, and gestures to a few people in the crowd before continuing to the ringside area. She stops before entering the ring to see the entire Marauko family inviting her in. Before she can move a muscle her song is replaced by “Headstrong” by Trapt. Everyone looks up at the entrance ramp as the Brothers of the Beast make their way out to the top of the entrance ramp.

Jason Midnight: You know we were in the back watching this, and decided that we didn’t like the odds here.

Jacob Morgan: Yeah so we decided to come out, and even this thing out a little more.

The two men drop their microphones, and continue down the ramp to join Erites Kallisten at ringside. Frank Tsonga informs Mario’s family members that they must vacate the ring now, and they comply without taking their eyes off the Brothers of the Beast. Contempt is etched in all three of their faces as the exit the ring, and stand at ringside. Erites Kallisten enters the ring, and the referee walks over to her. As Frank Tsonga starts to check her for weapons, the two sides on the outside start to head towards each other. Frank Tsonga walks away from Erites Kallisten, and tells both sides to stay on their respective sides of the ring.

Frank Tsonga then calls for the bell.

The two circle the ring as five pairs of eyes follow the action from the outside. Mario tries to get the early jump of Erites, but she uses her speed to get around it. She counters every advance he makes with a swift dodge, and then a counter-strike to the lower body of Mario. She appears to be focusing on the right knee of Mario, and trying to bring the man twice her size down.

Chastity Gold: That’s how you take it to a man with that much of a size advantage. Take them down to your level.

Rick Fantastic: That’ll work as long as she can keep out of arms reach of Mario. If not it could take seconds to have her on the mat where he can take advantage of her.

Mario is finally able to get his hands on Erites, and whips her into the ropes. Mario lifts a leg to plant a boot into the face of Erites, but she is able to slide under it. She bounce back up as Mario turns around, and nails Mario in the chest with a drop-kick. The move barely seems to have fazed Mario at all. As Erites starts to get to her feet, Mario nails her with a double axe handle to the back, and back of the head. Erites falls back to the mat. Erites starts to get to her feet again to be met with the same blow.

Rick Fantastic: As I was saying earlier.

Mario gets Erites to her feet, measures her up, and then brings down an open handed chop onto Erites’ chest. She crumples to the mat as Mario starts to look proud of himself. He watches as Erites gets on all fours, and then stomps on one of her hands. He then stomps on the other hand. Now he appears to be playing with his opponent by kicking her slightly around on the mat. The Marauko family seems to be deriving amusement from this. Mario goes for a pin.

1…

2…

Kickout…

Chastity Gold: This is sick how he seems to be toying with her, and his family seems to condone this kind of behavior around women.

Rick Fantastic: Well when you step into the ring with the boys, you have to be able to handle yourself with the boys. That means taking whatever punishment they have in store.

Mario gets Erites back to her feet, and sends her into the corner. Mario sets up Erites, and power-bombs her into the corner leaving her slumped on the mat. Mario then places his boot onto the side of her face, and pushes her face towards the ring-post. Frank Tsonga comes over, and starts to administer the five count.

1…

2…

3…

4…

Mario breaks the hold, and Erites slumps to her side. Frank Tsonga gets Mario away from Erites, and Mario keeps Frank busy while Martino puts a choke-hold on Erites from the outside. The Brothers of the Beast see this, and head in that direction. The Maraukos leave Erites as the Brother get close by.

Chastity Gold: What a despicable action by the older brother of Mario. It’s a good thing that Erites has someone watching her back out here.

Rick Fantastic: What I want to know is what does a win for Erites get them if that’s what they are after?

Back inside the ring Mario gets Erites back to her feet, and starts to handle her like a rag-doll. Mario simply shoves her down to the mat, and then gestures towards the rest of the Marauko family that he is already getting bored. Mario reaches down to grab Erites by the hair to bring her to her feet, but Erites rakes his eyes with her nails. Mario stumbles back blindly with his hand over his face as Erites gets to her feet slowly holding her neck. Mario tries to blindly clothesline Erites, but she is able to duck. She follows up quickly with a drop-kick to the back of the knee she has been working on sending Mario down to one knee. Erites follows that up by running into the ropes, and on the rebound using Mario’s own knee as a springboard to nail a enziguri to the back of Mario’s head. Mario slumps down to the mat. Mario rolls onto his back, and Erites grabs the bad leg. She holds it for a moment before flipping over Mario’s body, and nailing him with a hamstring pull. Mario starts to grab his knee now more. Erites goes for a pinfall.

1…

2…

Kickout…

Chastity Gold: Close call for Erites. What an impressive move by Erites to get Mario onto the mat.

Rick Fantastic: Well you know what they say about close…

Chastity Gold: Don’t even go there with the whole hand grenades thing.

Mario rolls away from Erites, and grabs his knee again. Erites gets Mario’s leg out of his hands, and bounces off the nearby ropes nailing his knee with a drop-kick. Again he grabs the knee. She continues to work on the knee before getting him to his feet. Erites sends Mario into the corner, and climbs the turnbuckles above him. She starts to send right fists into the head of Mario. She lands two fists before he shoves her off. She quickly rebounds, and gets back over Mario landing two more punches. Once again he shoves her off. This time when Erites charges into the corner she uses her speed to run up the front of Mario, and nails a kick to his chin with a running toe kick before finishing off with a backflip landing on her feet. Mario staggers out of the corner, and falls to both knees. Erites gets to the top rope, and is calling for Mario to get back to his feet. Mario does so, and turns to face Erites just as she launches herself off the top rope attempting a hurricarana. Mario, however, is able to use Erites’ momentum against her, and instead lands a falling powerbomb. Both are laid out on the ring. Mario reaches over, and places one arm over Erites.

1…

2…

Thr… Kickout…

Rick Fantastic: What a great move to use Erites’ speed against her, and lay her out. Now good enough, though, as she is able to kick out of the weak pin.

The Marauko family is shouting, and slapping the ring from the outside as the Brothers of the Beast do the same on the outside as well. Mario starts to stir first putting his attention on his knee, and Erites starts to stir while holding her neck. Both finally make it to their feet. Mario is still hobbling a little. Mario lunges after Erites, but she is able to quickly move out of the way nailing Mario with a drop tow hold sending him throat first into the bottom rope. On the outside Martino makes his way to another side of the ring from the other two Maraukos. He acts like he’s about to slide into the ring, but Frank Tsonga sees this first. Frank heads over to him as the Brothers of the Beast also make their way towards Martino. Back in the ring Erites sees this, and pulls something out of her tights without being noticed by anyone. Erites gets back to her feet, and walks over towards Mario. As she starts to get Mario to his feet, Matteo climbs to the ringside apron, and appears to be sporting some brass knuckles. Just as he is about to clobber her with the knucks, she blasts his face with a small can of pepper spray. The older Marauko falls off the apron, and onto the ground below. Erites then gestures for the youngest Marauko to try her as well, but he simply goes over to check on his grandfather.

Rick Fantastic: The elder Marauko gets an eye-full of pepper spray, and goes down hard.

Chastity Gold: And it looks like the young Mosé wants none of that.

Just as she is about to turn around Mario grabs her, and places her in a full nelson position.

Mario starts to lift Erites, but she sends a heel backward into the groin of Mario. He loosens his hold of her arms enough to get the arm free with the pepper spray in it. Erites aims it over her shoulder, and sprays Mario’s face. Mario now backs up while holding his eyes, and his groin. Mario starts to stumble around as Erites gets on the nearby middle turnbuckle. Mosé tries to get her off, but she holds on. Seconds later Jason Midnight sends Mosé reeling with a right fist to the temple.

Mario starts to wipe his eyes clear, but just before he can get a focus on anything Erites launches herself off the top rope, and nails her N.S.F.W. She goes for the pin. Jacob Morgan keeps Martino busy as Frank Tsonga starts the count.

1…

2…

3…

DING ~ DING ~ DING!

Kimber Marshall: The winner of this match, in 6:15, is ERITES KALLISTEN!

Chastity Gold: Despite the distractions by the Marauko family, Erites finds a way to come out on top. What a huge upset!

Rick Fantastic: She found a way alright through a can of pepper spray, and the tag team Brothers of the Beast.

Chastity Gold: Well as they say all’s fair in love and war.

Rick Fantastic: Those proverbs are better suited with me saying them. We’ll be right back!

 

You never took me out Paul!

As we return from commercial break, we see the rare sight of backstage interviewer Brian B.A.R.E., sitting on top of a large production crate in front of some leftover Mayhem set pieces, eating a small pastry that appears to be some sort of brownie. Placing the brownie back on the small white paper plate positioned next to him, Brian giggles to himself before letting out a deep sigh and drearily pulling open a copy of the Akron University Buchtelite newspaper, getting a small pop from the fans in the arena. He reaches from behind the paper for a glass of milk on his opposite side, but before he can grab it, a hand wrapped in athletic tape reaches into the camera view and drops two electric blue tablets into the glass, causing the milk to fizzle and turn the same shade of blue almost instantly. Brian finally reaches the glass and takes a large gulp before suddenly and violently choking on its contents.

Brian B.A.R.E.: Ackrgahah! Wrong pipe!

The hand reaches back into the camera view and smacks B.A.R.E. on the back forcefully, causing the interviewer to stop choking, drop his paper, and look up at the man in front of him.

Paul Paras: Perhaps it’s not the pipe that’s wrong, but the person using it?

The Akron fans erupt as the camera view pans over to reveal the #1 Contender for the HOW World Championship, “Perfect” Paul Paras! Triple P leans against his Singapore cane with one hand, adjusting his mirrored sunglasses with the other as he peers at his strung-out “friend.” Brian’s bloodshot eyes grow wide as he scrambles all around him for his microphone, quickly hiding the brownie behind him in the process. He finally finds the mic in his jacket pocket and stands up off the crate, trying to look as professional as possible, despite appearing as if he hasn’t slept in about three weeks and sporting a ridiculous grin on his face.

Brian B.A.R.E.: Ladies and gentlemen, I am pleased to welcome the #1 Contender, the Minnesota Messiah, “Perfect” Paul Paras!

Paul Paras: …And ladies and gentlemen, the Perfect One is pleased to welcome HOW interviewer extraordinaire, Brian B.A.R.E.!

Brian B.A.R.E.: Wow, really?!

Paul Paras: No.

Brian’s ecstatic face drops as the fans laugh and cheer at his plight. The interviewer nervously attempts to re-find his words as Paras simply continues to stare at Brian without changing his expression.

Brian B.A.R.E.: Umm… so Paul, just one week ago in Fort Wayne, you shocked a large part of the wrestling world when you defeated the HOW World Champion in a lumberjack match, taking a 1-0 lead in your Best-of-Seven series! How did you defeat the force that is Aceldama?

Paul’s mouth slowly forms into his trademark smirk as he turns his attention toward the camera.

Paul Paras: “Shocked,” Brian? The wrestling world was “shocked” that the Perfect One felled the mighty Aceldama, despite the entire Mayhem roster looking to take my head off at a moment’s notice? Brian, my beating Aceldama was no shock—it was a wake-up call. Ever since Wolfgang Bruggemann joined the HOW roster, there hasn’t been a single wrestler, announcer, or fan who hasn’t stood in awe of the pure power and tenacity of the man known as Aceldama… including me.

The fans respectfully applaud and cheer Aceldama after the show of humility from the Perfect Athlete.

Paul Paras: Lee Best built Aceldama to the moon. Shane Reynolds made him look invincible. Max Kael treated him as a godsend. So when I defeated Reynolds to become #1 Contender to Aceldama’s belt, I knew that I would get a chance to stare that awe directly in the eye… and let me tell you, Brian—it didn’t disappoint. However, after all the hoopla, all the fanfare, and all the excitement surrounding Aceldama going into this Best-of-Seven series, it seems that “large part” of the wrestling world forgot one simple fact—Ace may be amazing, but I’m still the honest-to-goodness Perfect One.

Akron explodes into cheers once more. Brian looks slightly woozy as he reaches for the crate in back of him to steady himself.

Brian B.A.R.E.: It seemed like last week was the continuation of a long road for Aceldama. He’s trying to be a better person and overcome his past. He even said he could relate to your personal tragedy! Then at the end of the show last week, we saw the two of you teaming up to…

Paras takes off his sunglasses and glares at Brian, causing him to silence himself. Paul pauses for a long moment then takes a deep breath before continuing as Brian’s face grows a deep shade of red, wondering if he shouldn’t have blabbed out Paul’s business.

Paul Paras: Brian, thank you for your overwhelming concern…you ignoramus. Yes, Aceldama did bring up some rather personal business last week on Mayhem. For those of you who don’t know, a young fan and follower of mine by the name of Elise Hale died not long ago after trying to live her life in the image I once portrayed. You people remember… the excess, the gratuitous using of others, the irresponsibility… the things I am not proud of that it took a lot of time to get past to become the man I am today. If Aceldama wants to better himself from his own tragedies, I give him all the credit in the world, but he has to understand that it will earn him no sympathy from the Perfect One or these HOW fans—our respect is earned in that wrestling ring.

The fans concur loudly in response to Triple P’s statements. Paul coolly replaces his sunglasses and looks back at Brian, who is precariously repositioning his feet to keep from toppling over, his other hand now clutching a piece of metal fencing behind the interview site for dear life, his eyes practically rolling back into his head.

Brian B.A.R.E.: That’s right! Respect is earned! R-E-S-P-E-C-T! Ace will go down…down…downtown…Uptown girl! She’s been living in her uptown world! I bet she never had a…

**CLANGGGG**

Brian B.A.R.E.: AAHHRGGH!

Paras thankfully stops this edition of American Idol by loudly cracking his cane against the metal fencing. Brian collapses in a heap on the arena floor as Triple P looks down at him. Paul reaches down and snatches the microphone from Brian’s hand as the fans respond fervently to their new interviewer.

Paul Paras: Huh…usually they’re knocked out before the Billy Joel. I suppose I should’ve tested with 2% milk before jumping straight to whole. How disappointing. Moving along…

He slowly runs his hand along the woven metal of the fence, getting a preview of the cage match that awaits in the main event. Paras then faces the camera once more, moving the cane up to his shoulder.

Paul Paras: Fans, Parasites, Ohioans…the Perfect One is live in your city and ready to scratch, claw, and fight his way to glory tonight! You can put us in a fifteen-foot high steel cage, you can surround the ring with lumberjacks…hell, you can make it a Lee Best on a pole match for all I care—last week, I did something very few in this business can claim by defeating the mythical Aceldama. Tonight, as we are trapped inside a mass of metal and mayhem, I plan on increasing that claim. Bruggemann…Ace…we may have teamed up last week, but I respect you enough to know this is going to be an all-out war.

His smirk returns as the hot crowd in the arena turns the hallway into a sound tunnel of cheers for the Perfect One.

Paul Paras: Be ready, champ. No one can cage the Minnesota Messiah.

The deafening cheers continue as Paras turns and heads back up the hallway. Just before he leaves, he turns around and raises the microphone to his lips once more.

Paul Paras: Oh, and don’t worry, Mario. I haven’t forgotten about last week. After all, what’s the upcoming holiday season without a little…Family togetherness?

He snaps the cane against the floor and tosses the microphone behind him, walking into the light at the end of the hallway amidst the crowd’s reaction. The camera scrolls back to the passed out Brian B.A.R.E. for a second before cutting back to ringside.

Rick Fantastic: Man, I feel for you, Brian. A long night on the town with the ladies will get you every time!

Chastity Gold: I seriously don’t think his condition had anything to do with that, Rick. But Paul certainly looks confident to face the World Champion again tonight! Can he go 2-0 against Aceldama in a steel cage?

Rick Fantastic: “Paul?” Does the man have a last name, or are you two already up to “Sweetie” and “Snugglebug”?

Chastity Gold: Quiet, you! We have a HUGE matchup about to begin as the LSD Champion David Black makes his return to Mayhem to take on the man who verbally lambasted him last week, Tim Shipley! The tension has been building for a week; I can’t wait!

Rick Fantastic: Is that what you told Triple P last night?

Chastity Gold: Shut up, Rick! I…uhh… pardon my partner, ladies and gentlemen! Let’s get to the ring!

 

Tim Shipley vs. David Black
No Disqualification Match

The fans are pumped for the match that will pit the LSD Champion against whom some are calling the biggest contender for his title, Tim Shipley. After the words that have been exchanged by both parties over the last week, the fans are geared up to see both men tear each other apart in the ring. Some have even brought it upon themselves to bring a few weapons to the arena for the match in an attempt to get them used by one man or the other.

Kimber Marshall: The following contest is a No Disqualification match! Introducing first, weighing in at 225 pounds and hailing from Milton Keynes, England… TIM SHIPLEY!

The crowds pop for the still relatively new superstar and his manager Roxie Sykes who make their appearance at the entrance ramp as Shipley’s music hits. The fans are on their feet and roaring and those who have brought weapons are thrusting them towards Shipley in hopes he’ll take one. One fan in particular stands out to everyone and the cameras are quick to put him on the HOV. He’s wearing a baseball cap pulled low so his face can’t really be seen and is holding a steel chair that he’s taken the time to put “SHIPLEY” in bold, red letters on it.

The crowd starts up a quick chant of “take it” that makes Shipley pause and look towards the chair as if considering his options. Despite his hesitance, he is convinced to take the chair by Roxie who urges the fan interaction. But as soon as Shipley comes close enough to take the chair, the fan bring it down against Shipley’s skull. The fan is quick to jump over the barricade and follow up the chair shot with a hard boot to Shipley’s side. He then proceeds to angrily stomp on the fallen Shipley and brandish the chair at Roxie every time she tried to brave closer. Finally, the “fan” backs off from Shipley to rip off the baseball cap and fling it into the crowd and revealing himself as… DAVID BLACK!

Rick Fantastic: The LSD champion from the crowd!

The fans begins to boo and throw the customary trash at the LSD champion who merely sneers at them before focusing back on the task at hand. Taking a fistful of Shipley’s hair and pulling him to his feet, Black proceeds to pull Shipley along by his hair down the ramp. Roxie is following behind the pair and is clearly agitated as she can’t get close to the chair-wielding David Black. Finally, Black gets Shipley down to the ringside area and uses his grip on Shipley’s hair to whip him into the steel steps. Black then slides into the ring and makes his way to the corner near the steel steps and sets the chair up in the corner. Once he finishes, he rolls back out of the ring and chases away Roxie who was attempting to rouse Shipley so he can roll his opponent into the ring and follow him in. In doing so, Romeo Ward finally is able to call for the bell for the match to officially begin.

Chastity Gold: David Black using the No Disqualification rules that Shipley himself suggested to his advantage before this match has even begun!

DING ~ DING ~ DING!

Black picks Shipley up and sets him up in the corner so he’s facing the chair with his chest against it. Then Black backs up to the opposite corner and charges across towards Shipley aiming to execute the Knee Express. But Shipley has regained enough of his faculties to realize he’s in dire straits and quickly pushes out of the corner causing Black to crash and burn straight into the chair. The crowd roars their approval as Black nurses his damaged knees on the mat while Shipley takes a moment to recover from the earlier assault by Black.

Both men recover at about the same time as Black is quick to his feet and goes for a clothesline on Shipley, but Shipley ducks and follows suit with a clothesline of his own that misses. The two men engage in a staredown before Shipley ties up with Black for a grapple that Black scurries out of. Black goes for a Side Russian Leg Sweep, but Shipley is able to fight out before he can set it up and counters into a Vertical Suplex.

Rick Fantastic: These fans are really getting behind Tim Shipley here! They want someone… ANYONE, to get the chance to take the belt off of him and Shipley will earn that chance with a victory here tonight.

Shipley takes a moment to soak up the cheers of the fans and then, after some prompting from Roxie, calls to end the match with a submission.

Tim tries to apply the Newton’s Paradox, but Black is able to struggle free and gets a kick in to Shipley’s head, dazing him. After another quick exchange of grapples, a DDT from Shipley, followed up by a swinging neckbreaker gives the advantage to the fan favorite. Shipley follows up with an elbow drop to the sternum, then another and goes for a third, but Black rolls out of the way. Black applies an arm lock, but Shipley is able to fight his way free. But as Shipley gets up, Black is there to meet him!

Chastity Gold: BLACKOUT! From out of nowhere!

David Black scrambles for the cover and Romeo Ward drops to the mat for the count!

ONE!

TW-

Before Ward’s hand can come down for the two count, Roxie intervenes by grabbing a hold of Black’s leg and tugs him off of Shipley. Black comes to his feet in obvious fury and stalks to the ropes to shout down at Roxie who has turned her back as if to feign innocence. Instead, Roxie reaches down into her shirt to produce a pair of brass knuckles that she slips onto her hand and turns around and shouts back at the LSD champion. Black makes the mistake of leaning too far over the ropes to shout at Roxie, who delivers a devastating blow to his jaw with the brass knuckles causing Black to fall back into the ring.

Rick Fantastic: Roxie, with the brass knuckles, just floored the LSD champion!

Shipley is just stirring now and is unaware of the interference of Roxie as she shouts for him to cover Black which Shipley obliges quickly.

ONE!

TWO!!

Chastity Gold: Shoulder up!

Black gets a shoulder up just as Ward is about to slap the mat for a third time and now the crowd is on their feet as Shipley lifts Black, only to be met with a solid punch. This sets both men to trading blows as the match has clearly worn both men to their limits. Black finally gains the upper hand when he hits a neckbreaker and drops for the cover.

A one count is all he can muster before Shipley squirms free. Sensing urgency, Black ascends the turnbuckle in the nearest corner, then leaps off to hit a picture perfect splash off the top rope to the fallen Shipley. David locks eyes on Roxie, whom he gives chase to, as he slides out of the ring. Roxie backs away as quick as she can as Black approaches. She backs up until she gets to the guard rail and finally tries to swing her still loaded fist for Black’s jaw. Only for her fist to be caught by Black who robs her of the brass knuckles and slips them on his own fist to deliver a knock out blow to Roxie.

Rick Fantastic: No! Not to that beautiful face! Sure Roxie’s a bitch and a half, but she’s doesn’t deserve this!

Chastity Gold: Then maybe she shouldn’t have interfered in the match!

Lifting his fist to the air, much to the chagrin of Rick and the fans close by, Black nearly punches Roxie until Shipley makes the save, catching David off-guard with a desperation suicide dive!

Rick Fantastic: Oh my! The elevation!

Shipley is all rage now as he rains down kicks and punches on Black before finally shoving him into the ring. Once both men get back to the ring, Shipley is back on Black with more punches and kicks until Black is able to hit a high knee and follow it up with a Bulldog that lays Shipley out. Black goes back to work quickly with hard fists to the head of Shipley until he finally busts him open, which causes him to grin widely and lift his bloodied fist for all the fans to see. However, he doesn’t take long to enjoy the moment as he continues to put the boots to Shipley.

Black stays on top of Shipley for a few more moments, but Shipley’s finally able to get some momentum as he counters with a knife-edge chop that staggers Black. Shipley charges forward with a boot to Black’s gut and leapfrogs over his doubled-over opponent. Shipley leverages himself with the ropes and uses Black as a springboard before back-flipping off the top turnbuckle into a DDT!

Rick Fantastic: ETERNAL HOPE!

ONE!

TWO!!

THREE!!!

Kimber Marshall: Here is your winner in 12:49… TIM SHIPLEY!!!

Chastity Gold: What a huge win for the Mayhem keeper! He’s done it! He’s now EARNED the right to face David Black for the LSD title!

Roxie is ecstatic as Ward lifts Tim’s arm high into the air and joins him in the ring to celebrate. She embraces an exhausted Tim Shipley around the neck and squeezes hard as Black holds his forehead, trying to assess what just happened.

Roxie urges Tim to exit the ring and they scurry away before Black dusts off the cob webs. Realizing he just lost, Black begins to steam in the direction of Shipley and his red-haired accomplice. He seethes through his teeth as Shipley smirks back in his direction before disappearing behind the curtain.

Rick Fantastic: I’ll give it to both competitors… what a tremendous match!

Chastity Gold: And we still have Match 2 of the Best of Seven series for the World championship to come!

Rick Fantastic: Not to mention some Kirsta Lewis… her match with Shane Reynolds is NEXT, right after this commercial break!

 


Tim Shipley just earned an LSD title shot by beating the champion himself! He joins Golden Phoenix as one of the top contenders for the title.

 

This is my happy little surprise…

Back LIVE on Mayhem, Erites Kallisten is seen at the back door of the James A. Rhodes Arena, eagerly signing off on a package while casting a quick glance back over her shoulder. She ushers the delivery man away, her eyes already fixed hungrily on the brown paper wrapping. She hugs the thin paper to her chest and rocks from side to side with a broad smile spread across her bubble gum lips, the injury from her victory over Mario Maurako seemingly left behind in this moment of personal victory.

As she turns around to sneak off with her package, her mismatched eyes settle on the camera. She blinks her blue and green eyes in surprise. She glances this way and that down the hallway to ensure no one else was around before sliding closer to address the camera man in a more confidential tone.

Erites Kallisten: Ya guys are everywhere, eh?

She lifts the package, wiggling it happily in front of her like some toy she was all to proud of. She admires the bland packaging with delight as she holds it out for the camera to take in, her hand held over the writing but between her fingers as the camera zoomed in was the name “Evelyn” able to be seen between her short black tipped fingernails.

Erites Kallisten: This is my happy little surprise fer Kirsta. She might be barely aware of my existence at the moment, but I assure ya, that won’t last. Speakin’ of Kirsta, it’s ’bout time fer her match! That’s somethin’ no one should miss, eh? Off wit’ ya!

With that, she clutches the package to her chest once again and practically skips off down the hall, her smile ablaze as she vanishes off around a corner.

Chastity Gold: What in the heck was that all about? Erites Kallisten with a package of some sort?

Rick Fantastic: Oooh… say that again for me Chaz. But slower and softer this time…

Chastity Gold: You know what I meant, you horn-ball!

Rick Fantastic: Hey, I’m just saying… she can handle my package any time she wants!

Chastity Gold: Folks, my sincere apologies for my broadcast partner who has been nothing short of “on point” all night long.

Rick Fantastic: What?!? Erites is hot… in that punk-goth-pink-haired-cute sort of way.

Chastity Gold: ::sigh:: Back to the action…

 

Shane Reynolds vs. Kirsta Lewis
Singles Match

Rick Fantastic- Up next is Shane Reynolds taking on “The Hellcat” Kirsta Lewis and I am sure that Shane will want to get one up on Kirsta for her involvement in his banishment from the now disbanded Best Alliance.

Chastity Gold- But Kirsta will also be looking to grab what would be a mighty impressive victory as she begins life without the Best Alliance. But for both opponents, there are those who loom over them, waiting to strike and ruin their every opportunities.

Rick Fantastic- That is right Chastity, Shane has a thorn in his side in the name of Graystone and let’s not forget that Kirsta is being constantly watched by the obsessive Erites Kallisten. If I was a gambling man, I would bet on one, if not both of them having a say in this match.

*The lights go dim as Kirsta’s music kicks in as she rides her motorcycle to the ramp and begins to rev up the engine as she proceeds to quickly bring it down the ramp and circles the ring not once but twice. She is met by jeers and chants of ‘once a whore, always a whore’. She ignores them, confident with her status as the #1 ranked Female Wrestler in the world, and stops the bike, putting it onto its kick stand. Taking off her helmet she flails her hair about then rolls under the ring, in preparation for her opponent*

Kimber Marshall- In the ring, hailing from Fort Lauderdale, Florida, she weighs in at 130lbs, KIRSTA ‘THE HELLCAT’….LEWISSSSSS!!!

*There is not a moment’s hesitation as the music of Shane Reynolds kicks in. He strides to the ring confidently after his earlier encounter at the hospital with Graystone, keeping his focus now on his opponent Kirsta. He stops by her bike and steps over it and onto the seat, smiling at Kirsta as he does*

Rick Fantastic- Oh my, does Shane not know never to get in the way of a woman and her bike?

Chastity Gold- I think that is makeup Rick.

Rick Fantastic- I think Shane does not need to worry about makeup, he seems to have it in abundance!

*Kirsta, showing her anger at Shane touching her bike, rolls out of the ring and begins to charge at Shane but as Shane sees her coming towards her, he quickly takes the bike off the kick stand and rolls it towards her! Kirsta takes the full brunt of the massive bike on her small frame. Shane standing by the ramp simply laughs it off as the referee Frank Tsonga orders him to cut the crap and get into the ring. Shane plays with a battered Kirsta for a moment , kicking her when she is down, then grabs a lump of her hair and violently rolls her into the ring as he brings himself in also*

DING ~ DING ~ DING!

*The match is underway as Shane has the upper hand, taking advantage of his dirty trick previously by applying more pressure to her midsection, standing on her then simply walking off. He picks Kirsta up and throws her towards the ropes, as she comes back he clotheslines her viciously, lowering his arms so the impact was on the chest region. He drags her over to the corner and gets onto the second rope, and with a diving fist he plants her again on the chest, Kirsta is writhing in agony, holding her chest*

Rick Fantastic- Sore boobs for Kirsta.

Chastity Gold- Rick! I swear, you are really asking for it tonight!

Rick Fantastic- Sorry, her mammary glands will be bruised in the morning, that better?

Chastity Gold- I suppose.

*Shane is actually looking like he is enjoying the punishment he is dishing out to Kirsta. He picks her up once again by the hair; pulling her closely to him he speaks ‘Let’s do something about that pretty little face of yours’ before delivering a terrifying double-knee facebreaker. Kirsta is flat down on the canvas, he moves over her body, moving her to the other side and begins to mock her, looking down and smacking her face from side to side. It seems Kirsta is out of it, but then all of a sudden, out of nowhere Kirsta grabs Shanes flailing hand out of mid air and with the other hand she flips him her middle finger with a smile before giving him a very painful low blow.

She springs back to action, charging at him with an elbow, he goes down to the canvas, then as he springs back up again, she meets him with a clothesline, again he springs back up and this time she finally floors him for good with a standing toe kick. The momentum has swung in Kirsta’s favour as she runs off the ropes and comes down on him with a sliding tackle.

Kirsta now stands and goads Shane Reynolds to get up as she stomps her foot onto the canvas in preparation for the Hells Bitch Kick. Shane gets up slowly as Kirsta stalks her pray, and she comes forward lifting her foot and plants the Hells Bitch Kick straight to the chin of Shane. But instead of fall flat onto the canvas, the momentum of Shane sends him under the ropes and to the outside.*

Chastity Gold- I thought Kirsta had him there, but he ended up on the outside with that devastating kick.

*Kirsta sees Shane in her sights as he begins to get up, she runs and suicide dives straight over the top rope but straight into the arms of her opponent as Shane catches her mid air and body slams her straight onto the frame of the bike! Shane also falls backwards in exhaustion.*

*Both are flat down on the outside as the referee begins the count to ten. Shockingly it seems that Kirsta, even though she had just been placed straight onto a metal frame of a bike is getting too first, but still looking rather groggy.

There seems to be a massive commotion coming from the ramp area as it seems Erites Kallisten is trying to make her way to the ringside, but she is being held back by security. Kirsta stands upright now and sees the newcomer trying to come towards the ring. Holding the edge of the canvas, she goads Erites to come on down, telling security to let her pass, but they are having none of it. Shane is still down, face down in front of the bike, but moving slowly. The referee’s attention has been broken as he draws his attention to the ramp and starts instructing the security to bring Erites backstage.

Erites begins to get pushed backstage and Lewis waves her goodbye and gets back to the task at hand as she moves over to Reynolds, his ‘lifeless’ state was all but a rouge, as he turns around and plants Kirsta with her very own helmet! The referee has seen nothing as he makes sure Erites has been sent backstage*

Chastity Gold- Oh come on! Ref, you HAD to have seen that!

Rick Fantastic- Enough of your ‘girl power’ bullshit already Chastity. It’s ok to be outsmarted by a man, even if it is one who wears makeup.

Chastity Gold- I swear Rick, I am going to take off this stiletto of mine and plant it so far down your…

*Shane stands up smiling menacingly as he pulls Kirsta up by her lifeless body and picks her up over his head and with little to no ease THROWS her over the top rope and into a heap near the middle of the ring.

He goes to the top rope and signals for the Diablo’s Inferno which he delivers with essence, flying across the ring in a 450 degree spin, landing on Kirsta, he grabs her leg and Tsonga goes for the pin*

1…

2….

3…..

DING ~ DING ~ DING!

Kimber Marshall- Your winner at a time of 8 minutes 34 seconds, SHANE REYNOLDS!!!

*Tsonga tries to raise Shane’s hand but he brushes him away. He looks at Kirsta’s lifeless body on the canvas and kneels next to her, twirling her hair in his fingers. He smiles sadistically and pulls a pair of scissors from out of his boots, admiring them with glee. He runs his fingers on one of the blades and says ‘Let’s see who will love you now, you whore.’

Chastity Gold: Come on! This is uncalled for! Shane Reynolds is a revolting excuse for a human being!

But just as Shane grabs a chunk of Kirsta’s hair, the lights go off. There is a loud commotion but the lights remain off for several uneasy moments.

Rick Fantastic: This can’t be good…

Chastity Gold: Ladies and gentlemen, it appears we are having some technical difficulties…

Suddenly, the lights come back on again and Shane looks rather confused. As he looks down, he is met by Kirsta’s hand, which grabs onto his throat.

Rick Fantastic- Is it just me or has Kirsta Lewis gotten bigger?

Chastity Gold- Amm, I don’t think that is Kirsta Lewis…..

*The person stands up and seems to tower over Shane by about 2 inches, but the funny thing is, it LOOKS like Kirsta Lewis, same hair, same attire, but with one noticeable difference; on the other hand, a white cast.*

Chastity Gold- That is Graystone!! He was in the hospital earlier this morning!!

Graystone takes off the wig he is wearing and smiles at Shane.

Rick Fantastic: And Kirsta is coming to behind Shane!

With his grip still on his neck, Graystone pouts at Shane and spins him around quickly, right into a groggy Kirsta Lewis who musters up enough energy to nail him once again with the Hell’s Bitch Kick, this time, using her other leg!

Rick Fantastic: HBK!!! Wait a second…

Chastity Gold: Yes Rick, the Hell’s Bitch Kick!

The kick produces an immediate stream of blood from Shane’s face and Kirsta produces a faint smile as well, as she reaches down and pulls a blade from the tip of her boot.

Chastity Gold: Looks like that kick had a bit more ammo to it than we originally thought!

Graystone smiles and blows Shane a kiss before rolling out of the ring with Kirsta close behind.

Rick Fantastic- The Best Alliance may be no more, but it seems these two are still able to work together.

Chastity Gold- Well if it means getting one over on Shane, why not?

Rick Fantastic- Main Event is next folks! We’re going to clear the ring for a moment… hope you’re geared up for the steel to come down!

 

Climbing the Unclimable Mountain

*The ring crew does their duty while at the announcer’s table, a rather sombre looking Chastity Gold is holding her ear, as if getting information from somebody in her earpiece. She has been looking at her monitor for the last couple of minutes and what she has seen has brought a slight tear to her eye. Rick Fantastic has not taken notice of this and is simply turning to the fans and talking to them, especially the female members of the crowd*

Chastity Gold- I have just been watching some footage folks that I am going to get played back to you all now that the last match is over. Trust me; it will bring a tear to your eye.

Rick Fantastic- You’re a girl, a sick puppy brings a tear to your eye! What is it? Perfect Paul Paras has a zit?

Chastity Gold- It is footage filmed earlier today, when world champion Aceldama arrived to the arena and specially requested to have the steel cage above us here lowered so he can see it first hand, take a look at a man who….is fading fast.

*EARLIER TODAY*

*Inside an empty James A Rhodes arena Aceldama, dressed in his wrestling attire is standing in the middle of the ring as High Octane Officials begin the slow process of lowering down the steel cage. After a few moments the cage is totally surrounding him and he goes forward for a closer inspection, shaking it to see if it is stable. He looks up and then down, and with a deep breath charges at the steel cage and proceeds to climb up it. He gets halfway and has to stop, he is totally out of breath and his arms are shaking. He has no energy whatsoever. He loses grip and slides down the cage, his feet hitting the edge of the canvas as he falls backwards through the ropes and back into the ring.

Angered at himself, he brushes himself off and again charges at the cage, this time faster but with more purpose about him. He literally leaps onto the cage, halfway up and proceeds to climb. He literally moves a few feet and then one hand loses grip of the cage. He manages to get it back and proceeds to push his foot up to the next level, but slips and instead of fall down he brings himself back down and once again goes back to the middle of the ring. He shouts out in anger and emotion, beginning to punch his own head to vent his frustration.

This time he takes a new approach, he decides to take it slower, taking each step at a time. It seems to be working. He is past the halfway stage and still going strong. He is now at the top, all he has to do is pull his legs upwards and over the metal structure. He pulls out his left leg and flings it upwards. Now he is beginning to breathe heavily. He gets it around the edge, now he tries to pull himself upwards using his upper body strength, but there is none left in him, the climb up was too much. He loses grip of the steel with both hands and awkwardly he falls back down to the canvas with a mighty thud. The officials storm the ring through the door to see if he is alright, but the second they come anywhere near him he swots them away in frustration*

Aceldama- Leave me alone! Don’t fucking touch me! I don’t need your help….just…..let me be. I have done this many times before.

*Aceldama lies on the canvas for a moment, trying to maintain his composure. He uses all his pent up anger at his previous failed attempts and dusts himself off, standing up again he goes once again for the climb. He gets to the middle and he can feel the weakness come in, his muscles are being overworked, but he overcomes the pain barrier and carries on. He gets to the top and pulls himself up and over the cage. He is at the other side. All he needs to do is come down. But as he starts to descend down the cage, weakness gets the best of him and he lets go, falling downwards, not backwards, feet first. He lands on his feet and immediately, before he even falls to the ground, he screams out in pain and goes to grab his right ankle. He lands onto the floor in a heap, holding his right ankle

Several scenes come in one after another of EMT’s working with Aceldama at the scene, him telling them to be easy as he is stretchered out of the main arena*

Rick Fantastic- That doesn’t look good for Aceldama tonight, not only does he look like he has injured himself he couldn’t even get over the cage! It took him four attempts and on the fourth and final, bam, injured.

Chastity Gold- Truly the sign of a man whose body is failing him, but his spirit will refuse to say no. I am hearing we have more footage just filmed moments ago from the doctor’s room.

*MOMENTS AGO*

*Aceldama is sitting on the doctor’s bed being tended to the High Octane doctor who is rubbing at his right ankle, the look of pain on Aceldama he is trying to mask, but when the doctor touches the right place it is hard for him to hide the pain.*

Doctor- It’s not broken, that is the good news. But it is badly sprained, I don’t think you will be able to wrestle tonight.

Aceldama- Oh yeah? Just watch me. You doctors think you know it all, well tonight I will prove you all wrong.

Doctor- Fine, have it your way, after all, I am only a highly qualified doctor and all.

Chastity Gold: At least it’s not Shane Reynolds…

*Aceldama gets up off the bed and proceeds to walk, with some difficulty out of the room and down the corridor, ready for his second match with Paul Paras*

Rick Fantastic- This is just getting ridiculous! Not only can Aceldama not climb the cage, but he is going to continue to wrestle with a sprained ankle? 2-0 Paras.

Chastity Gold- Underestimate the World champion at your own peril, Rick. That match is next after these short messages.

 


Lee’s Lethal Lottery returns on November 5th with three titles on the line!!

 

Match 2 in Best of 7 for the HOW World Title
Aceldama vs. “Perfect” Paul Paras
Steel Cage Match

PERFECT PAUL PARAS – 1, ACELDAMA – 0

Velvet Revolver’s “Headspace” welcomes us back to Mayhem and the above title displays over the HOV screen.

Kimber Marshall: This next match is Match 2 of the Best-of-Seven series for the HOW World Championship. Introducing first, from Minneapolis Minnesota, weighing 255 pounds… the “Minnesota Messiah”… PERFECT PAUL PARAS!!!

Wearing his trademark mirrored shades, a confident Triple P strides out from the back to a huge reception from the fans. Greeted by a HUGE explosion of blue pyro above him, Paul slaps many hands at ringside before he reaches the ring with a look of focus and determination as he eyes the 15-foot high steel cage above him.

Chastity Gold: Welcome back to Mayhem folks and there you see the Number One Contender!

Rick Fantastic: Don’t get too excited there Chaz…

Chastity Gold: I’m never going to hear the end of it, am I?

Rick Fantastic: Probably not until long after you retire from this business, I would imagine.

Chastity Gold: Anyways, before the break, we all saw the condition of our World champion as one of our esteemed High Octane physicians diagnosed Aceldama with a sprained ankle. Just how badly will that injury affect him in this match Rick?

Rick Fantastic: In a steel cage match where the only way to win is to escape the cage, I’d bet a large sum of cay-sh on the Perfect One…

Kimber Marshall: And his opponent, from Berlin, Germany, weighing in at 275 pounds… he is the HOW World champion… ACELDAMA!!!

Tool’s “Vicarious” fills the arena and the fans share their empathy for the World champion with a huge ovation, perhaps even bigger than Triple P’s.

Aceldama appears at the top of the stage from a contraption that raises him up from beneath it. He soaks in the applause for a moment and uses it as a means to hype himself up for the match before making the long trip to the ring, limping with every step along the way.

Rick Fantastic: This man is in no condition to fight Chaz.

Chastity Gold: Well it appears that his ankle has been heavily, heavily taped as we now see the cage being lowered from above! Just listen to this crowd Rick! These fans here in Akron are really showing their support for the champion… But in all seriousness, Ace could find himself crawling his way out of a 2-0 series deficit if he’s unable to overcome his injury and somehow, some way find a way out of that cage to defeat his opponent.

Almost a minute and a half passes before Aceldama finally reaches the ring, prompting a look of concern from his opponent as well as everyone else in attendance that questions whether or not he can truly compete.

Aceldama gives a stern, glaring nod to Romeo Ward, indicating that nothing will stop him from competing here tonight as he slowly climbs the ring steps into the ring.

Aceldama un-straps the World title from his waist and hands it to Ward, who quickly hands it to a ring attendant as the cage descends completely. On the outside, Frank Tsonga indicates to his colleague that things are secure and gives the go ahead to Romeo to start the match. Romeo instructs Frank, who will be tending the door, to close it shut and nods to Kimber to ring the bell.

DING ~ DING ~ DING!

Aceldama immediately charges Triple P, his opponent meeting him half way with a lock up before Paul quickly breaks things up to Ace’s bad leg. Aceldama falls to one knee in pain and favors his sprained ankle, but Triple P wisely targets the area with several more stomps that has the champion shrieking in pain.

Rick Fantastic: Well Triple P is playing it smarter than I thought, wasting no time at all targeting Aceldama’s sprained ankle. This one could be over before it starts!

Aceldama exerts a desperate cry as Paras uses the ropes to spring himself up and then down on the bad ankle. Ward checks on the champion, who angrily refuses assistance because of his resiliency.

Chastity Gold: The sign of a true warrior… Aceldama trying his hardest not to show any weakness here, but it’s simply too obvious. We are talking about a man that defended the World title successfully only days after having a heart transplant, but he is just jeopardizing his career even more by wrestling here on this bad ankle.

Aceldama tries to pull himself up using the ropes, but falls to his knee again in pain and Paul is quick to capitalize. He applies a side headlock to Ace, who shoots him to the opposite end of the ring, but Paul comes off too fast and floors the World champ with a spinning heel kick!

Paul pounces on Aceldama with a barrage of punches before he stands and hits a standing leg drop across his chest.

Chastity Gold: Looks like were about to see our first escape attempt in this match!

With Aceldama floored, Triple P begins ascending the cage and carefully climbs to about mid-way up before Aceldama halts him in his tracks and yanks him down by the ankle. Paras lands hard while Aceldama disregards the fact that he’s gotten no offense in to this point and begins climbing the cage himself!

Rick Fantastic: What the hell is he doing? He’s apparently got a death wish!

Triple P is quick to notice and immediately tugs Aceldama from the bottom of the cage and back into the ring, Ace still favoring the ankle. Paul targets the ankle once again, but is blinded with a thumb to his eye. Using much of his upper body, Aceldama lifts Triple P by the side of his trunks and into the air, holding him there for several moments to allow the blood to rush to Triple P’s head. Finally, Aceldama powers his opponent to the mat with a Vertical Suplex that echoes throughout the crowd on impact!

Chastity Gold: Amazing strength by Aceldama!

The champion drops an elbow into the sternum of Triple P who gets the wind taken out of him in the process. Paul gasps for air while Aceldama continues his onslaught of offense, jabbing fists wherever he can across Triple P’s body. Leveraging himself as best he can without planting his bad ankle, Aceldama grabs the arm of Paras and Irish whips him into the opposing turnbuckle. A very winded Triple P is unable to avoid the collision and meets it chest-first, flying backwards after tremendous impact.

Rick Fantastic: Wow, Triple P comes off hard! You could almost feel his chest bruise right there!

A very blue-in-the-face Paras holds his chest in pain and continues to gasp for air as he tries to regain his breath. On the other hand, Aceldama knows he can’t waste any time and begins climbing the cage once more. He uses his recent momentum and actually makes considerable progress up the cage when Triple P comes to his feet, his pain still visible as written on his face.

Paras finally notices that Aceldama has nearly made it to the top of the cage and begins climbing the cage after him.

Chastity Gold: Ladies and Gentlemen, BOTH men are now climbing the cage and they aren’t exactly small in stature, are they Rick?

Rick Fantastic: I’ve seen an abundance of steel cage matches in my day Chaz, but NEVER one with as big of implications as this match right here! Aceldama is so close to the top, he can taste it… but Triple P is right there too, hot on his trail.

Chastity Gold: Look! Aceldama’s got his leg over!

But as Rick said, Triple P was faster to climb the cage and meets his opponent at the top for a very intense and very dramatic confrontation.

Rick Fantastic: Triple P does too!

Chastity Gold: These two are staring each other face-to-face at the top of the steel cage!

Triple P probably makes the biggest mistake you can make in his position and looks down to canvas below him, which is a good 20-25 foot drop. Perhaps he was thinking of lunging himself off the cage, but as he looks back to his opponent, he’s caught off-guard with a stiff right hand that staggers him backwards and almost off the cage!

Rick Fantastic: Triple P nearly fell off there!

Chastity Gold: And Aceldama has got to be careful! Had he done so, Triple P would have won the match and gone up 2-0!

Triple P responds with a right hand of his own, but his punch is immediately returned by Aceldama, whose punches appear to be more effective. The superstars trade blows back and forth until both of them are extremely dazed and woozy, fighting to keep their balance and leverage at the top of the cage.

Chastity Gold: Perfect Paul Paras and Aceldama are BRAWLING at the top of the cage!

Rick Fantastic: This match could go either way! And that speaks volumes about the World champion who has somehow remained competitive in this match despite his sprained ankle.

Chastity Gold: LOOKOUT!

Aceldama fights through the overbearing pain in his ankle and manages to get his other leg to the outside of the cage.

Rick Fantastic: I can’t believe it! All he has to do is jump down to the canvas and he’s tied this series right back up!

Chastity Gold: He would break his ankle!

Despite the serious implications of jumping off the top of the cage, you can tell that Aceldama is mulling the decision.

Rick Fantastic: He’s gonna jump! He HAS to jump!

Aceldama braces himself at the top of the cage and nearly loses his balance once again, but as he’s about to leap off the cage, Triple P stops him short with a headbutt!

Chastity Gold: NO! Triple P denying the World Champion of his opportuni-… JESUS CHRIST! JESUS CHRIST!

Rick Fantastic: OH MY GOD! OFF THE TOP OF THE CAGE! TRIPLE P JUST CLOTHESLINED ACELDAMA BACK INTO THE RING!

The force of Triple P’s clothesline not only knocks Aceldama off the cage, but takes him for the ride as well as Aceldama LITERALLY flips backwards and lands chest-first onto the mat below. Triple P takes a similar impact, but the sacrifice it took may have saved him the match right there.

Crowd: HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!! HOLY SHIT!!!

Chastity Gold: Somebody get the ambulances ready! These two men just fell 25 feet from the top of the cage!

Medics do, indeed, rush the ring and stand by waiting for Romeo Ward’s signal to call the match. Romeo literally kneels between both men, checking back and forth between them until he signals that the match is to continue.

Rick Fantastic: I- I’m speechless.

Chastity Gold: I ADMIRE the determination of these two superstars and wish I could say I had similar resolve!

With a white towel in hand, General Manager Faze even appears at the top of the stage with a genuine look of fear and concern for the safety of these two mega-stars.

Rick Fantastic: What the hell? What is Faze doing out here?

Chastity Gold: I don’t blame him one bit! Regardless of injury… regardless of exhaustion… NEITHER of these superstars are going to stop until this match is over. They’re putting their CAREERS on the line!

However, Faze looks hesitant to be out there and even stops himself half-way down the entrance ramp as there are signs of life from both men as they desperately try to recover from the fall. Triple P struggles to his knees and indicates to Romeo Ward that there’s no way in hell he’s going to stop this match and Aceldama gives a similar look as he begins coming to as well.

In a moment that they will remember for the rest of their lives, Aceldama and Triple P exchange the same look with each other as they crawl forth, fighting to their feet with everything they’ve got.

Rick Fantastic: Paras is up!

Chastity Gold: Aceldama is up!

The crowd roars as they both come to their feet, realizing they are witnessing a Main Event for the ages. Favoring his ankle, Aceldama ignores the pain and charges at Triple P, but Paul catches him and plants him right back down to the mat!

Rick Fantastic: RPW SPINEBUSTER!

Chastity Gold: HUGE momentum shift!

Aceldama lies on the mat for several seconds before Triple P begins to climb the cage again. Faze watches on from the stage with anticipation as Triple P gives everything he has to fight his way slowly up the structure.

Chastity Gold: Aceldama is down, and I don’t think he’s getting up!

Rick Fantastic: Triple P’s going to take it!

Aceldama stirs in the middle of the ring and notices that Triple P has made considerable progress up the cage and has no chance of catching up to him with his bad ankle. Ace lunges his body at the cage itself in hopes that it will shake his opponent off, but Triple P keeps his grip and balance and reaches the top.

Chastity Gold: The door! Aceldama has to get to the cage door! It’s his only chance!

Rick Fantastic: We’re looking at a literal race here folks!

Lifting one leg over the top of the cage, Triple P can feel victory in his grasp as Aceldama is fighting with everything he has left in him to get to the cage door, which has been opened by Referee Frank Tsonga. Faze and the High Octane medics nervously stand by as the fans shout to no superstar in particular, they just can feel the intensity.

Paul finally gets his other leg over the top and descends a few feet down the cage before he deems it safe to make the jump. He looks down to the ground below him and then over to Aceldama, who is struggling to get through the ropes near the cage door.

Rick Fantastic: HE JUMPED!

Triple P lunges off the cage at the same time that Aceldama lunges his body through the ropes and out the cage door.

THUD!!

Chastity Gold: OH LORD!

SMACK!!

Triple P lands hard on the ground and Aceldama lands awkwardly as well, immediately favoring his sprained ankle. The medics split up and rush to both men as the Referees scramble to determine the winner. There appears to be some initial debate between Romeo Ward and Frank Tsonga until the HOV replay makes it clear who the victor is.

Chastity Gold: Ladies and Gentlemen, this decision has come down to INCHES…

Romeo that walks over to Kimber Marshall with the decision.

Kimber Marshall: HERE IS YOUR WINNER IN 15:53… ACELDAMA!!!

The title on the HOV screen changes to reflect the following.

PERFECT PAUL PARAS – 1, ACELDAMA – 1

Chastity Gold: …and this series is TIED UP! I’ll say! The heart these two men showed… just incredible!

The cameras catch one last glimpse of the medics attending to Paras and Aceldama as they lay next to each other in pain outside of the ring.

Rick Fantastic: We’re WAY over time… stay tuned next week for another exciting episode of Mayhem…

Chastity Gold: …and the LETHAL LOTTERY, where the entire landscape of HOW can change in just one night! Goodnight everybody!

END TRANSMISSION

Show Details

James A. Thodes Arena

Akron, OH

Show times

  • 9:00PM
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