Mayhem: February 2nd, 2009 (2009)

Weekly Show | 120 Min

Show Transcript

Monday Night Mayhem
Monday; February 2
nd, 2009 – #HOW35
The Best Arena; Chicago, Illinois

Opening Signs..

The HOTv logo fades to black and is replaced by the Monday Night Mayhem logo which then gives way to a live shot inside the Best Arena as Welcome to the Jungle blasts thru the PA system and the crowd is on their feet and HOW cameras capture several signs being held up by the fans.

Static is THE Wrecking Ball of HOW”

Faze of HOW”


Ill bid my allowance”

My dog fears Carey”

Bring back Master C”

I have FAITH in SLADE”

As the music fades out we are welcomed by the announce team of Joe Hoffman and Big Buff Benny Newell.

Joe Hoffman:  Welcome everyone to Monday Night Mayhem and what a show we have for you tonight folks. I am Joe Hoffman and as always I am joined by Big Buff Benny Newell…a sober Newell.

Benny just blows off Joe as Hoffman continues.

Joe Hoffman: Well anyway…tonight we have four more Best invitational matches, a number one contenders match for the LSD Title, a main event featuring three tag teams representing three stables here in HOW and finally….we will hear from none other than Jatt Starr and that is not even going into detail about the big changes around here in the past week courtesy of the announcement that the investors are pulling their money out of HOW…..whew….I miss anything Benny?

Benny Newell: You forgot to mention that tonight we will see Graystone pass his drug test and show Kostoff that he is a fucking idiot like Lee has claimed for all these years. The World champ on drugs? Cmon..

Joe Hoffman:  You are right Benny and folks from what I understand Kostoff requested and has been granted time here at the opening of the show to give the results of the drug testing of the World Champion and it is time for that right now!!

Drugs and Money

Name of the Game” by The Crystal Method hits as the fans immediately jumps to their feet. Chris Kostoff emerges from the backstage with a purpose as the fans go wild. Kostoff walks down the ramp towards the ring, keeping his eyes staring straight forward. In his hand he holds a sealed white envelope.

Joe Hoffman: Kostoff means business, here tonight, Newell.

Benny Newell: Spare me, Hoffman.

Kostoff walks up the ring steps and enters the ring. His music cuts as he walks over to the side of the ring and grabs a microphone from an HOW crew member. He stands, as the fans are coming unglued. Kostoff waits for the fans excitement to die down, as he finally begins to speak.

Kostoff: Last week, here on Mayhem, I announced that a certain individual must undergo a drug and alcohol test. This individual is The HOW World Champion Graystone.

The crowd lets out a loud boo.

Kostoff: I believe we all are well aware of the stipulations of the HOW Wellness Policy. If one should fail the policy, their pay will be suspended for one month.

Benny Newell: Heh. Whatever.

Kostoff: And in Graystone’s case, should he fail his drug and alcohol test, he will be stripped of his HOW World Championship effective immediately.

The crowd goes wild at the possibility of seeing Graystone without the HOW World Championship.

Kostoff: So without further delay… I would like to…

Back in Black” by AC/DC hits, as the fans boo loudly, and the camera cuts to the top of the ramp. Security guards begin to pour out of the backstage area, until an entire line of at least 15 begin marching their way down the ramp, and climbing into the ring.

Joe Hoffman: What’s with all of the security?

Then, the boos get even louder as Lee Best emerges from the backstage, with a pissed off look on his face.

Benny Newell: Finally!

Lee Best is followed closely by Commissioner Scottywood, Blaze, and Static. At the very back, behind all of the Best Alliance members, is Graystone wearing the World Championship around his waist, followed closely by a sickly looking Thomas Clayton Gray III. All of the men make it to the ring, and begin entering. The security guards make a wall in front of Kostoff, as several more surround the ring.

Joe Hoffman: The pageantry of it all…

Benny Newell: It’s The Best Alliance. Fortunate for Kostoff, he’s got security out here to protect him.

Joe Hoffman: Oh that’s what they’re for… Kostoff… Right.

An HOW Crew member hands Lee Best a microphone, as his music cuts. The fans begin chanting “Asshole” over and over again. Blaze and Static yell at the fans in the audience, as Scottywood stands rigid, staring at Kostoff.


Kostoff: Thank you for joining us Lee. It’s always a pleasure.

Lee shakes his head in disgust.

Kostoff: Now… I don’t want to delay this announcement any further than we have to. I want to get this over and done with. Right here in this envelope is the results to the tests. No-one, except for the test administrators that examined the results this past week, have seen this information. Right now we are going to find out whether or not Graystone passed or failed his drug and alcohol test.

Lee Best: Get on with it numnuts.

Kostoff pauses for a moment, then begins ripping open the envelope. He pulls out a white sheet of paper. Kostoff stares down at the paper, examining it.

Lee Best: What does it say, dammit?

Kostoff: We hereby conclude that Graystone…

Kostoff shakes his head in disappointment. Kostoff looks out to the crowd shaking his head.

Benny Newell: Haha! He passed. I knew it.

Lee Best: Dammit, Kostoff! Read it!

Kostoff: We hereby conclude that Graystone… has failed his drug test.

The crowd erupts in cheers, as Lee’s face turns completely pale. Scottywood’s jaw drops, as Blaze and Static turn around and look at Graystone, who is standing sternly.

Kostoff: We, the test administrators found significant traces of the substances: Cocaine, Marijuana, Ecstasy, OxyContin, Hydrocone, and steroids.

The crowd continues to go nuts, as a smile comes across Kostoff’s face.

Joe Hoffman: My God. I’m speechless.

Benny Newell: You’ve got to be kidding me! I demand a retest.

Kostoff flips the page over.

Kostoff: Furthermore, it is the recommendation of the test administrators that Graystone cease to serve as an active member of the roster until further testing has occurred, and it is our recommendation that Graystone be admitted immediately to a detoxification program or risk severe adversity to his health.

Lee Best: BULLSHIT! Let me read that.

Lee pushes past security and snatches the paper from Kostoff. Kostoff stands, half smiling at Lee Best, knowing that Graystone’s fate has been sealed and that there is no going back. Lee reads the verdict back to himself, and then shakes his head in disappointment.

Benny Newell: This is ridiculous. There is no way.

Joe Hoffman: I am as shocked as you are.

Lee turns to Graystone, and Graystone has his head looking towards the ground, the ultimate showing of shame.

Lee Best: I can’t believe this… How… How could you do this to The Best Alliance? I trusted you.

Lee turns to TCG3.

Lee Best: And you… You were brought in to be his advisor. How dare you! You’ve done absolutely nothing!

TCG3 turns away from Lee with a sour face. Lee walks back over to Graystone.

Lee Best: Look at me.

Graystone continues to look down at the mat.


Lee Best rears his hand back and slaps Graystone as hard as he can across his face. Graystone slowly raises his head up, as the fans let out a mixed reaction.

Lee Best: I should Bottomline your ass right now! You’re worthless! You’re a nobody! You’ve ruined everything.

Lee Best shakes his head, and gulps. He turns to Blaze and Static.

Lee Best: Dammit… strip him of his title.

Lee moves back as Blaze and Static begin to zero in on Graystone. TCG3 rushes forward as if he is going to attack Lee Best, but Graystone puts out a hand and stops him. TCG3 looks confused, as Graystone holds both of his hands up in the air. Blaze and Static work in tandem, and quickly remove the title from around Graystone’s waist. Blaze hands the HOW World Championship over to Lee. Lee looks at Graystone, sick to his stomach with disgust

Lee Best: Get out of my ring.

Graystone stands, staring, unwavering.

Lee Best: NOW!

Graystone continues to stand defiantly.

Lee Best: Security… Get this piece of garbage out of my ring.

Security begins to walk towards Graystone, but Graystone turns about face and slowly makes his way through the ropes and hops down to the outside. TCG3 drops down and rolls out of the ring as the cameras and focus shifts to Lee Best who is staring at Chris Kostoff.

Suddenly a man appears from the back and it is none other than William Hislip. The crowd boos loudly as EVERYONE is now focused on the man who has been the face of the investors for several months now.

William Hislip: Now that Kostoff has gotten his business out of the way I wanted to come out here and address you all about what all the rumors and what not that have been spreading like wildfire since the announcement that my group was pulling out of HOW.

The crowd boos loudly as inside the ring the Best Alliance and Kostoff are transfixed on the man at the top of the stage that holds the keys to all their careers in his hand basically.

William Hislip: Both Lee and Kostoff know all the ins and outs of why this is happening but I will give you the quick and short version. Yes we are pulling our funding from HOW and yes it will begin immediately starting next week on Mayhem as tonight’s show is officially the last show with our backing. My group has bought out the rest of our contract with Lee Best for a nice fair sum and that was made official earlier today.

The cameras turn towards Lee who is smirking inside the ring but quickly loses his smile as Kostoff turns back towards him and glares.

William Hislip: Basically all that did was allow us to cut our losses now instead of waiting till April, and also allowed Lee Best to add to his war chest for the bidding war for our 50% stake in HOW. So with that said I would like to formally announce that we will be taking bids until February 23rd and at that point we will look over the highest bid and make sure it is all legal and all funds are there and we will officially sell our stake at the March to Glory PPV on March 16th.

There is a buzz in the arena as the deadline to make a bid for a stake in HOW is now officially known.

William Hislip: We came into this business venture looking to make money and instead we have several lawsuits pending courtesy of Lee Best and the other out of control superstars here under his watch.

The crowd cheers loudly at the idea of rebellion against the corporation.

William Hislip: Tonight is a sad night as I am a fan of High Octane Wrestling and an even bigger fan of Chris Kostoff’s and that is why I say with great sadness that effectively immediately…Chris Kostoff is fired as our representative and going forward has no booking our administrative powers here in HOW.

Kostoff’s face turns into a pure color of rage as the Best Alliance behind him start clapping.

William Hislip: I am sorry Chris but business is business and you are now expendable. I did work out a deal with Lee during the buyout talks and you will be allowed to finish up your wrestling contract….Sorry?

Kostoff slowly begins to exit the ring and walk towards Hislip as the man drops his mic and quickly heads to the back as inside the ring the Best Alliance are all patting Lee on the back as Lee looks up to the heavens and exhales and then smiles from ear to ear as Joe takes Mayhem to its first commercial break.


No unemployment?

Back live and cameras have raced backstage where Kostoff has cornered William Hislip with several HOW crewmen and wrestlers watching from a distance.

Kostoff: What the fuck is this about?

Hislip: It’s about the money Chris…

Grabbing him by his throat, Kostoff peers into the eyes of Hislip. The crowd is going wild as they watch this go down on the HOTv screen as Kostoff lifts the man off the mat by his throat.

Kostoff: Money? Fuck your money!!! Fuck the rest of your investor’s money. I never needed it. I did this to fuck with Lee. Did you think that I really wanted to be a baby sitter for Best and his bitches?

Letting go of his throat, Hislip lands on his feet. Backing up, Kostoff begins to pace back and forth as Hislip brushes himself off. Looking up at Kostoff…Kostoff charges and takes down Hislip!! The crowd goes wild as the big man unloads a series of rights and lefts to the investors face. Blood flies from the skull of Hislip as Kostoff gets to his feet and pulls Hislip up and shoots him into a near by wall where Hislip’s head hits with a sickening thud as he bounces off the wall groggily and towards the HOW Hall of Famer.

Kostoff catches him and drives him down with the Dominator!!! Reaching into his pocket Kostoff pulls out a loaded leather glove. Pulling Hislip to his feet Kostoff unloads a wicked right hand to the skull of Hislip. The sickening sound of metal slamming into bone echoes throughout the backstage area and throughout the arena. The crowd falls silent as Kostoff drops Hislip as blood now flows from his head. The crowd looks on as Kostoff gets down on his knees and stares into the bloody eyes of his former employer…

Kostoff: Fuck you!!! Fuck your investors. Next time I see your sorry ass I’m going to make sure that the county coroner has an extra slab of meat to look at.

With that Kostoff stands up and turns to see all the crew and wrestlers watching them and they quickly scatter as Kostoff takes a deep breath and then turns towards the camera..

“Where’s Best at?”

No one answers and Kostoff turns and walks off as the action returns to ringside to Joe and Benny.

Ryan Faze vs. Static

Singles Match

Joe and Benny are in awe of the pure rage in Kostoff as they try to steer the conversation towards the first match up of the night.

The HOTv comes to life showing all the groups in the Invitational and their points for each man.

The Lynx Group is then highlighted showing the two men at the bottom but Joe notes that both men have had some really tough matches.

Guy ‘Static’ Stephens slowly makes his way to the ring, boos raining down on him. Static doesn’t seem to care as he slides into the ring, and stares at the entrance ramp.

Hoffman begins a tirade of why Static is making a huge mistake of joining the Best Alliance, but Big Buff cuts him off and reminds the fans that Best alliance or not, Ryan faze is no where near phenomenal and cant even beat his own meat with that knee.

Suddenly, Ryan Faze “The Phenomenal One” comes out, the fans cheering for the kid who has made waves in HOW.

Hoffman is quick to point out all the damage the knee of Faze has suffered, and that Static will no doubt be looking to zero in on that knee. Big Buff chimes in says that Faze wont amount to anything in HOW, bad knee or no.

Ryan Faze slides into the ring, not limping, but its obvious he is not 100%.

Hoffman reminds the fans that this is a Best Invitational Match-up, but both men really have no chance to win their groups and thus this match is strictly for bragging rights and other rankings. But this match means a lot to both men as both need to prove they can make it in HOW.

The bell rings, and Static shoots for the leg, but even with the bad wheel, Faze uses his quickness to dodge the single-leg attempt.

Static tries another single leg, but it is also dodged, then Static tries a clothesline, but faze ducks, and shakes his heed that the larger Static wont get him so easily.

Hoffman points out that Faze is mixing up his normal ring strategy and is avoiding contact. Benny Newell states that Faze cant win like that.

Static backs Faze into a corner, then tries to clobber him with a huge clothesline, but Faze ducks and slips out the corner, then backs away. Static is angry now and charges, but Faze rolls out of the way.

Static and Faze play cat and mouse for a bit then the fans chant ‘WE WANT WRESTLING’ and if on cue, Static catches Faze, lifting him up on his shoulder for an Oklahoma Slam, but Faze is wriggling out of it, and drops down, and shoves Static into a turnbuckle.

Faze then proceeds to hit various strikes using his good leg, buzz saw kicks to the leg and body of Static combined with a one-legged dropkick and calf kick, then finally an enziguri which floors Static. Faze covers but only gets a 2 count. Finally, Static connects with a huge clothesline,  then pulls Faze up to his feet, sets him up for the STATIC SLAM, but Faze is fighting the double-underhook, then Faze clips Static in the left knee with a forearm, rolls away then gets to his feet, shakes the cob-webs off, and hits a bulldog on Static.

Hoffman comments that Faze’s strategy might pay off here.

Within seconds Faze connects with the FAZEPLANT Unprettier, and Static is out in the middle of the ring. Faze goes out to the apron, and springboards, connecting with a cork-screw senton onto Static, then he pins Static with the bridge and Mike Shea starts the count…









Post match we see Faze go to ringside and hold up a kids sign that reads FAZE OF HOW and as he turns to hand the sign back to the kid Static staggers out of the ring and chop blocks Faze’s bad knee.

The Wrecking Ball of HOW then continues to pound on the injured knee of Faze as the crowd boos unmercifully at Static as the kid holding the Faze sign begins to cry.

HOW security is finally able to pull Static off of Faze and as we cut backstage we see Faze holding his knee as he writhes in pain on the ground as Benny notes that Faze might of won the match but Static is the man walking out with his head held high.


Group Hug?

In the back we see Bobbinette Carey picking up her belonging around the locker room. Dylan Nitro walks into the locker room. Bobbinette just finishes picking up her things when she sees Dylan Nitro she walks over to him and hugs him. The Hug throws him off a bit.

Bobbinette: Dyl. I so wanted to talk to you and to David to.

Dylan: Yeah I got your message.

Bobbinette nods her head.

Bobbinette: I want to thank you so uber much for joining the KOE. I know you’re still trying to get your exact vibe. But after going through hell and half of Georgia with you in the place where we go way back… I know what it’s like to struggle. The ghosts of the past can uberly mess with you.

Dylan: I guess if anyone would know how to do that…

Bobbinette: I know it’s not easy. But I trust you and I think you’ve repented enough. Now is going to be time for us to extract justice. Swift clean cut and fix the company that has so much corruption.

David Black walks through the door of the locker room seeing the two of them in there. He isn’t sure if he walked in on something so he stands there quietly. In the corner of the room is Livie Carey. She’s wearing a robin costume and is ignoring the rest of the people in the room. Bobbinette smiles and extends her hands.

Bobbinette: David! I wanted us to have a chance to talk. All of us.. See Dyl and I go way, way, way back. You… there’s some vibe about you that sits well. I have an uberly epic vibe about this.

David looks at Bobbinette not sure exactly what she means by this but he nods anyway.

David: Thanks I think.

Dylan: She always talks like this. Trust me after a few years I still can’t understand what she’s saying.

David laughs breathing a sigh of relief.

Bobbinette: I wanted you guys to both know, from now on we are going to the ring together. I knighted you both because you were members of the old team that I actually picked. I wasn’t the best leader back then. But now we’re going to show the entire HOW just exactly what happens when you have true knights. Knights that stand for things. Justice, loyalty, and honor.

David looks over at Bobbinette then looks at Dylan. The three of them nod in agreement.

Bobbinette: Group hug?

Dylan shakes his head no, as David looks at her with an awkward gaze.

Action cuts to commercial…


Have a Cigar

Back live and we are inside the Best Alliance locker room, also known as Lee Best’s office, and we see Lee with his legs up on his desk while Scottywood, Blaze and a pacing Static all can be seen in the room as well.

Lee Best: Sit down Static. Jesus Christ you are making me tired just watching you pace. Who gives a fuck if you lost to Faze….I told you earlier today I wanted you to take the fuckers knee out and you did that. You think I care about win’s and losses in a match where nothing was at stake? He won the won the war.

Static nods and takes a seat in a chair on the far side of the room. The cameras pan over to see Scottywood working his cell phone as Blaze is eagerly waiting for Lee’s next words.

Lee Best: Ok Blaze I know what you are waiting on. Yes if you beat Nitro and thus win the Lynx Group I will give you a shot at a title here in HOW at March to Glory.

Blaze stands up and smiles and walks over and shakes the hand of the God of HOW.

Blaze: I knew joining you would pay off.

Lee Best: Ya ya ya. You just make sure you hold up your end of the deal ok?

Blaze nods.

Lee Best: Ok good. Now go get ready for your match and remember….W I N!

Smiling, Blaze exits the room leaving Lee, Scottywood and a still amped up Static.

Scottywood is still on his cell phone and he finally hangs it up and smiles at Lee.

Lee Best: Well?

Scottywood: It’s done. He has agreed to do it live in the center of the ring next week…..

Lee smiles and leans back in his plush leather chair and pulls a cigar out from his suit pocket and proceeds to pull out two more and he motions Scottywood over and he hands two cigars to his Commish who turns to give one to Static as Lee continues.

Lee Best: Enjoy the Cuban cigar boys…cause next week right in the middle of my damn arena  we are going to officially sign a HOW Hall of Famer to a new contract……JATT FUCKING STARR!!!

The action cuts to Joe and Benny as the Best Alliance members light up their cigars as the crowd is buzzing all around the arena.

Blaze vs. Dylan Nitro
Singles Match

Thunderstruck by AC/DC hits the PA system and the self proclaimed Walking Razorblade Dylan Nitro makes his way out to a solid reaction from the fans as Joe Hoffman reminds everyone that the following match will determine the winner of the Lynx group as both men are tied. Benny reminds everyone that if Blaze wins, he will get a title shot of Lee’s choosing at March to Glory.

As Nitro enters the ring Joe reminds the viewers that Nitro beat Ryan Faze in a highly contested match last week, and that is the reason that the two men are tied in The Lee Best Invitational. Benny reiterates that there is no chance of Blaze losing, as he is Best Alliance.

Blaze’s music hits and he makes his way out and down to the ring. Blaze has a very focused look in his eyes, as he slides into the ring. The two men stare each other down, as Blaze’s music cuts and the bell rings.

Both men lock up in the center of the ring. Dylan Nitro gets the upper hand, and backs Blaze into the corner. The referee begins to count, telling Nitro to get Blaze out of the corner. Nitro lets go, but Blaze follows it up with a stiff kick to the gut, followed by a hard uppercut. Nitro stumbles backwards. Blaze rushes in to knock Nitro down with a clothesline, but Nitro ducks. Blaze turns around, and Nitro kicks Blaze in the gut. Nitro locks Blaze up, and delivers a huge suplex.

Joe reminds us how hungry both these men are to win this match, and that winning the Lynx group means everything to both men.

Nitro is up, and picks Blaze up by the head. Blaze counters out and blasts Nitro with a hard right hand. Another. Another. Blaze launches Nitro off the ropes, and hits Nitro with a hard back elbow to the jaw on his way back. Nitro falls down. Blaze favors his back, as he jumps on top of Nitro for the quick cover.



Blaze stands up and begins putting the boots to Nitro. Nitro manages to crawl over into the ropes, and the referee backs Blaze up. Blaze argues with the referee to get out of his face, then heads back over to Nitro. Nitro bursts with energy and lifts Blaze up and delivers a spinebuster! The crowd goes nuts. Nitro gets up and runs off the ropes and comes back and delivers a knee drop to Blaze’s head. Nitro covers.




Blaze manages to get a shoulder up, and quickly begins making his way to his feet. Nitro moves around and delivers a high double knee to Blaze’s face. Blaze flies backwards and lands on his back. Nitro goes for another cover.




Blaze is back up again, and with the referee out of position, Blaze hits a low blow on Nitro. Nitro screams in pain and drops to his knees. Blaze stands up, bounces off the ropes and hits a huge dropkick to Nitro’s chest. Blaze stands up and delivers a quick leg drop across Nitro’s neck.




Blaze picks Nitro up and hits him with several hard right hands. Nitro stumbles backwards, still winded from the low blow. Blaze finally hits Nitro with a hard right that sends Nitro over the top and to the outside. Blaze follows Nitro out and turns him around and hits him with a hard forearm uppercut. Blaze slides Nitro back into the ring. Blaze slides back into the ring.

Blaze dominated Nitro for a solid two minutes, before Nitro comes back with a huge low blow to turn the momentum. Dylan Nitro signals that the end is near and goes for his finisher. Blaze manages to counter and kick Nitro in the gut. Blaze locks in the Incenerator, and blasts Nitro with a jumping hammerlock DDT out of no-where.

Blaze covers and referee Joel Hortega counts.





Post match we see Blaze make his way to the back smiling from ear to ear as the HOTv shows the Lynx Group again and this time Blaze’s name is in GOLD and is blinking as he has officially made it out of group play and will move on to the semi finals.

Benny claims that ever since Blaze has joined the BA the sky has been the limit and the man has been on a roll and is now primed to get a title shot at March to Glory and have a shot at the World title.

Joe and Benny continue to go back and forth for a few moments before Joe cuts Benny off to announce that it’s time for America…Christopher America …to finally get his in ring time that he deserves!

In Ring America

Christopher America’s voice shouts “AMERICA!”

An American flag is shown flowing in the wind against a clear blue sky. The American national anthem begins to play…

A woman begins to sing: “O say, can you see…”

A record scratch is heard as Fort Minor’s “Remember the Name” plays.

Christopher America comes out. He holds his arms up and touches the tips of his fingers forming an A. As he does, red, white, and blue sparks rain down.

The crowd boos Christopher mercilessly. Christopher is wearing blue jeans, a white shirt with the word

“…IN” on the front and “AMERICA!” on the back in red letters. In his hands Christopher is holding some rolled up posters.

The crowd heavily boos Christopher. Christopher stops mid way down the ramp. He stops and furrows his brow. He points at the crowd and points back at himself while mouthing, “DO YOU KNOW WHO THE FUCK I AM? I’M CHRISTOPHER AMERICA!”

Christopher continues to mouth off to the crowd as he makes his way to the ring. He slides in and walks over to the far side demanding a microphone. Christopher is handed one. He goes back over to the center of the ring and sets his posters down.

Christopher: Good evening, my fellow Americans!!!

The crowd replies with more jeers.

Christopher: I…am Christopher America!

The boos continue.

Christopher: I realize that a lot of you don’t know me. In fact, by your warm reception, I can tell that you haven’t gotten to know the real Christopher America. Last week, Lee Best decided to not give me the air time that I paid for. Do you know what we call that? We call that…

Christopher picks a piece of paper out of his pocket and reads it.

Christopher: Dis-crim-in-a-tion.

Well, guess what? You’re all in luck! I am going to give you a history lesson and also give you a chance to know the real Christopher America…uninterrupted! How does that sound…in America?

Crowd: Shut-the-fuck-up! *clap clap clapclapclap* Shut-the-fuck-up! *clap clap clapclapclap*

Christopher bends down and picks up a poster. He unravels it and holds it up for the crowd to see. The poster is as tall as Christopher America is. It’s a picture of George W. Bush, the 43rd President of the United States of America.

Christopher: This…this is George W. Bush. He is the 43rd President of the United States of America. He…is a great American!

The crowd boos, but whether for Christopher America, George Bush, or both is unknown. Most likely, the latter.

Christopher America holds up his fist and begins to count as he speaks.

Christopher: He has kept our country safe from people like…



North Koreans…

The Stinky French…

And the sub-human Canadians!


Christopher America rolls up his Bush poster and sets it down. He picks up the second poster and unrolls it lengthways to reveal a picture of Christopher America naked with the American flag strategically placed over his body.

Christopher: Now this is a picture of me! Pretty handsome, huh?

The crowd is laughing at the sight. Christopher also begins to count on his hand again.

Christopher: I am also a great American. And like our illustrious 43rd President, I will protect HOW from the following people…in America…



Sub-human Canadians…

Stinky French…

And the stupid English!

The crowd boos louder and Christopher is almost getting drowned out. Christopher rolls up his poster and sets it down.

Christopher: As an American, it is my duty to educate all the stupid people out there, and yes, that would be those idiots in attendance too. So, next week, I hope you will all make time for me again…in America. I’m going to reveal which roster members I like and which ones I don’t.

Christopher cups his hand around his lips and speaks in a whisper.

Christopher: Here’s a hint: I don’t like Un-Americans!

Christopher morphs his voice in a mock game show announcer style.

Christopher: Be sure to catch Christopher America later on in the show where he puts Damien Ryan in his place…

Christopher’s voice is now a snarl.

Christopher: Beneath my boot…in America!

The camera fades out for commercial…in America!


Sing Along…

Back live and the scene opens in the L.O.D locker room. Darkwing is sitting in the large leather chair that is usually kept in the corner, and Silent Witness is sitting on a bench next to his own personal are of the locker room.

Darkwing smiles genuinely at the camera, and motions it to come closer.

Darkwing: The Best Arena….filled to capacity with fans of the Paradigm of Popularity, Darkwing.

The fans explode, cheering for Darkwing who smiles.

Darkwing: As promised, I am here with Silent Witness to perform my remix to the age old HOW classic ‘Darkwing is Forever’. Long time HOW fans will remember this one, as it was the catalyst for the birth of Hall of Famer Mark O’Neal’s alternate persona….Marky Mark The Mix Master. Hit the music Witness.

Silent Witness: If we just had Mark here it would be like old times. Don’t you feel kind of bad doing the song, Darkwing?

Darkwing: Of course not! O’Neal has less fans than John McCain!

SW: But people actually liked John McCain….I personally hated his guts, but….

Darkwing: Who cares! Not enough people like him apparently! O’Neal couldn’t even get 90 year olds to like him, besides Kostoff! Hit the music and lets get this show on the road.

Witness shrugs, and pulls a remote out of his pocket, and presses a button. The track to ‘Diamonds Are Forever’ by Shirley Bassey begins playing softly.


Darkwing is forever…..

The Chocolate Popsicle is all you need to please you….

It can….stimulate and tease you……

It wont leave in the night,

Have no fear that it might…..desert you…..


The Chocolate Popsicle is forever…..

Hold it up and then….caress it…..

Touch it…..STROKE it and undress it…..

Nothing lies in the balls that will shoot out and harm….

Or hurt you…..


You wont need Lee Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeest……

His vanilla stick is way more leaner…..

Just ask Mindy….he has a party sized Wiener….

He doesn’t last loooooooooooong……

not even to the end of the sooooooooooooooooong


Suddenly the track to ‘Diamonds’ By Kanye West begins to play, seamlessly switching to the beats of the widely popular single.

Darkwing(rapping now):

Darkwing is forever….

The Chocolate Choice is on the rise to please your eyes….

Darkwing is forever….

Whenever Carey comes on the TV I begin to cry…..



Close your eyes and imagine,

Something tragic,

HOW ran by magic,

If Carey takes over the show, the remote, you’ll have to grab it,

And I realize that Lee Best is bad for business,

But Carey running the show with her down-syndrome sister I’m supposed to live with?

I’m a constant in your life like the sun and rain,

I’ve sent more wrestlers to hell than the Undertaker and Kane,

‘Damn is he really that caught up?’ you ask,

But when you talk about HOW legends do my name get brought up?


Suddenly, Darkwing stands up, staring past the camera, and Witness is also forced to take notice, turning off the music with the remote.

Darkwing: Can you give us some privacy, Witness?

Witness nods, and walks toward the camera, who hasn’t turned to face the person who interrupted the song. Witness passes the camera and you can hear him say ‘I’m a big fan of your work’.

Darkwing: It was you……no wonder he said I should’ve called you first. So give me some answers.

Darkwing crosses his arms and motions for the person to come in while at the same time, telling the camera man to cut feed. The scene back to ringside where Benny is dying for a drink after listening to that bullshit.

Joe ignores him the best he can as he tells the fans that up next is the Number One Contenders match for the LSD Championship is next!!

Damien Ryan vs. Christopher America
Singles Match

The intro riff to “Come to Life” by Alter Bridge starts playing for the arena sound system and the fans let out a mixed reaction. A giant maple leaf appears on the screen and then fades away as several pyro’s shoot off at the entrance and Damien Ryan comes onto the stage as the band joins the song. Ryan walks down the ramp, not acknowledging the fan presence at all, walks into the ring in a determined mode, stands in the corner for a minute. He slaps the maple leaf tattoo on his upper arm then jumps on the turnbuckle and raises his arms to an eager crowd.

Joe reminds us that the winner of this match will be the number one contender to the LSD Title.

Benny reminds us that Scottywood, a Best Alliance member, holds the LSD Title and is the referee for this match as he is currently in the ring.

Suddenly we hear the voice of Christopher America over the PA system.


On the HOTv an American flag is shown flowing in the wind against a clear blue sky. The American national anthem begins to play.

“O say, can you see…”

A record scratch is heard as Fort Minor’s “Remember the Name” plays. Christopher America emerges from the back waving an American flag on a metal pole back and forth as he has a wide grin across his face, and the crowd boos loudly.

Damien Ryan wastes no time, as he hops down out of the ring, and begins running towards Christopher America. Christopher America sees this, and whacks Damien Ryan upside the head with the flag pole. Whack! Damien Ryan tumbles to the ground. America hands the flag over to a crew member, and then begins delivering American stomps over and over on the back of Damien Ryan. America picks Ryan up and slides him into the ring, then America slides into the ring as the bell sounds to signal the start of the match. Christopher America picks Damien Ryan up and delivers an American DDT. Christopher America covers.




Joe says that it was a long two, and begins to wonder if Damien Ryan might have a concussion from the flag pole shot. The cameras replay the flagpole shot, and the sickening sound of the steel cracking against Damien Ryan’s head.

Back in the ring, Christopher America picks Damien Ryan up and puts Damien Ryan in an American headlock. Damien Ryan screams in pain. Ryan tries to break free, but Christopher America runs full speed ahead and blasts Damien Ryan with an American Bulldog. Ryan’s head bounces off the mat. Christopher America covers.



Kickout… barely.

Joe notes that so far Scotty has been fair with his counts.

Damien Ryan, loopy, begins to make it back to his feet. Christopher America goes for an American kick to Damien Ryan’s gut, but Damien counters with a Canadian foot grab, but Christopher America follows it up with an American enziguri. SMACK! Damien crumples to the mat. Christopher America covers and Scottywood  counts…




The crowd is stunned as Christopher America has defeated Damien Ryan and is the new number one contender for the LSD Title and Scottywood called a fair match!!


Post match we see Scottywood grab a microphone and announce that he could take America out right now but instead next week on Mayhem he will announce the time and the place for America to get his title shot.

The two exchange some barbs before Scotty slowly exits the ring and pats the LSD Championship belt around his shoulder as America motions that the time is coming when he will become the champ.

Action then cuts to commercial…


Chris Kostoff vs. Perfect Paul Paras
Singles Match

Back live and the HOTv comes alive and a video is shown with the graphic

DURING THER BREAK” shown in the corner of the screen.

A camera is fixed on the door to the Best Alliance office and suddenly it swings open and none other than Chris Kostoff makes his way out…and smiling?

The crowd, Joe, Benny and the rest of HOW are wondering what the hell is going on with that Joe notes that we might get some answers as its time for Kostoff and Triple P to square off with the winner of this match clinching the Narcotic group and joining Blaze in the semi finals of the Lee Best invitational.

Perfect Paul Paras then makes his way down to the ring, the fans booing him chanting ‘PAUL SUCKS!’ as he makes his perfect entrance.

The camera pans the crowd and you see signs like ‘PUSSY PAUL PARAS’ ‘KOSTOFF’S GONNA KILL YOU’ and ‘LOD > AOA’

Paul completes his perfect entrance by posing, to another chorus of boos, then lifting up the HOW stable title. and Hoffman at this time says that Paul may be one of the most hated men in HOW not named Lee Best.

Big Buff Benny Newell says that this is true, but still wonders how anyone can hate Lee.

Suddenly, Kostoff begins making his way down to the ring, changing instantly the boos to cheers, and ‘LOD’ chants can be heard.

Hoffman says that Kostoff has never been more focused on regain the HOW World title than he is now, and that Triple P may not be able to handle the intensity of Chris Kostoff…but what was he doing in the BA locker room??

Benny Newell reminds Hoffman than this is a Best Invitational Match-up and WHEN Kostoff loses, Paras will clinch his group and Kostoff will be assed out.

Kostoff slides into the ring, and rushes PPP. PPP tries to back away and get out the ring, but Kostoff grabs him and pulls him in, and starts wailing on him. The ref tries to get in the way, and pull Kostoff off, but Kostoff pushes him away and keeps wailing on PPP, who is covering up. The ref cannot disqualify Kostoff yet since the match has yet to start. Finally Kostoff gets off of Triple P and backs away, and the ref checks Paras over, to see if he still wants to continue. Paras gets to his feet and falls victim to Kostoff offense. The ref calls for the bell as Paras did get to his feet.

Kostoff takes control with forearm shots then an Irish whip into a backbody drop for a near fall. Kostoff hits high impact move after high impact move but Paras kicks out of every pin attempt made by the Hall Of Famer.

Kostoff hits Paras with a hard Reverse DDT, and then follows that up with a leg drop, then hits an elbow drop then ANOTHER leg drop then a cover….


1…………..2……………SHOULDER UP!!!!!!!!!!

Hoffman notes that Kostoff is in a frenzy here.

Kostoff finally grows tired of nailing Paras with slam after slam and applies a Camel Clutch.

Hoffman notes that it is odd for the hall of famer to use a submission hold, as he is well known for his bruising style. 

Paras is asked by the ref if he wants to submit, but he says no. Suddenly Paras PERFECTLY escapes the hold with a double-leg takedown and stands up.

Kostoff scrambles to his feet, but walks right into a PARASYTE, Triple P’s take on a Flatliner.

Both men are down, as Paras was too spent to quickly cover the LOD leader. The ref uses a ten count….


Suddenly Paras rolls over Kostoff and hooks the leg!




Kostoff kicks out, and Hoffman brings up that Kostoff is also pretty resilient.

Paras and Kostoff both get to their feet and start trading blows. Hoffman warns against trading shots with a guy like Kostoff, and Triple P pays for it, as Kostoff gets the upper hand and nails a Spinebuster.

Benny Notes that Kostoff looks fed up with this, and is probably looking for the NO REMORSE.

Kostoff indeed pulls Paras into position for his finisher, but at that moment, Triple M runs down to ringside and jumps on the apron in front of Kostoff. Kostoff throws Triple P to the side, and goes to get a piece of Triple M. Triple M is wearing the ICON title around his waist. Triple M drops from the apron in time, and Kostoff turns and walks right into an a set up for Triple P’s finisher, but Kostoff counters the STO backbreaker with a knee to the gut, then sets up again for the NO REMORSE. Kostoff lifts up triple P but Paras counters with punches, and suddenly lands on his feet, and shoves Kostoff backward…

Right into the referee!!!!!

The ref, Matt Boettcher,  is down, and Triple M slides into the ring Paras is trying to get to his feet, and Mario Maurako charges with the ICON title and swings for the fences but misses!!!!

Kostoff ducks the shot with the belt, MMM turns, gets a kick to the gut, and Kostoff sets Triple M up for the NO REMORSE, but outta nowhere, Paul Paras throws chili powder in the face of Kostoff, blinding him and forcing him to drop Triple M. Triple M gets to his feet, and sets up the blinded Hall Of Famer and hits Kostoff with the SIMPLY MARVELOUS!!!!!!!!!

Hoffman is screaming up and down that this isn’t right, and Newell is screaming that IS right.

Triple M rolls out the ring, Triple P quickly goes up top and connects with the PARASAULT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He yells at the ref who comes to after the interference, having no idea what happened, and Paras hooks the leg for the cover!!!








The ref hands Paras the Stable title and him and triple M celebrate, then suddenly stare down at Kostoff, but the rest of the LOD run down and the AOA get the fuck outta dodge as Darkwing checks on Kostoff who is still blinded. Sektor and witness watch the AOA as Hoffman mentions that Paras has clinched his group and will be moving on in the Best Invitational tournament.

Big Buff says that next time Kostoff should have LOD members better trained at coming down to the ring earlier and Kostoff might’ve won the match.

Hoffman says if not for interference from triple M, Kostoff would’ve won the match, and notes that we have to take another commercial break and when we return it is time for Maximillian Kael to use his purchased in ring time!!


Steak..its whats for dinner

Back live and the scene opens up with Issac Slade walking down the hall with a package under his arm, stopping in front of a locker room door marked “LOD” he smiles to himself and then raises his hand and knocks.

The Darkone himself answers the door, seeing Slade on the other side he looks at him wondering what could possibly bring this man back to his door after the last week, opening his mouth he goes to speak but Issac raises a finger cutting him off

Issac Slade: Now before you say a word just let me explain why I’m here ok?

Seeing no argument coming from DW for the moment Issac continues

Issac Slade: See last week our little “Sing along” well it got me thinking, about how long I’ve been here and about how long you’ve been here, the fact you’ve been around to experience “So much more” than me and that you are entitled to some respect and your social status that you now posses…to sum it up Darkwing you really helped me put things in perspective…and for that I wanted to thank you, with this gift

Holding the package out to Darkwing he pushes it into his arms and steps away

Issac Slade: I won’t take any more of your valuable time, I hope you enjoy the gift, because you’re a HOW Legend…and you deserve it.

Without saying another word Issac turns away  and leaves The Darkone holding the box

Darkwing opens the box, and the camera pans over his shoulder….

Inside, a stuffed cow, and a note taped to it….

Darkwing opens the Note on the cow, it says simply, “Besty”. His eyes get huge as he sees the other item…

A bottle of A1 sauce.

A note on the bottle of A1 steak sauce read “A1 it’s how steak is done…and I hear you like doing steak…have fun!”

Darkwing slowly turns toward the door, he throws the box across the room, he storms to the door and throws it opens and steps into the hallway, visibly angry. He looks up and down the hall, nods his head repeatedly as if acknowledging the message, then pulls his cell phone out his pocket. He calls someone, and places his hand over the camera and we cut to the announcers.

Prime Minister

Joe and Benny talk about how later this evening not only does Max have an ICON title match against the new champion but he also has been overly obsessed with Jatt Starr since Starr returned to HOW programming a few weeks ago.

Purtania” by Dimmu Borgir smashes over the P.A. system as the lights dim down. The blue and red lights begin to flash on the stage as the crowd immediately falls to boos at the arrival of Max Kael. On the stage two men in black suits with Maxopotamian arm bands step out. They pause for a moment before they slowly move toward the ring.

Shortly after that the Road Maxter 8000 slowly moves onto the stage with Max Kael seated in the front seat wearing a black suit and as smirk. As he appears on the stage the crowd illicit another round of boos though the music is strong enough to drown most of it out. As the Road Maxter makes its way down to the ring another two men in black suits with arm bands follow giving the crowd dirty looks on the way.

As they reach the ring Max steps out of the mini-hummer directly into the ring with a swagger. The men in suits step around the hummer as they pull a large black bag out of it. They slide the bag into the ring behind Max then move to the four corners of the ring where they apparently stand guard.

Max pulls out the official Maxopotamia Microphone and lifts it to his lips while standing in the center of the ring. “Purtania” fades as Max prepares to speak.

Max Kael: I am the Prime Minister of Maxopotamia.. Maximillian Kael.

Boos echo all around the Best Arena as “Fuck off Maxie, Fuck Off” chants. Max seems to ignore it for the most part as he continues.

Max Kael: As my quest to out shine the traitor, Jatt Starr, continues I have yet another item to remove from the list.. you see tonight you are all going to see history made for at this very moment you are about to watch something truly amazing.

He lowered the mic and grabbed the bag that had been slid in to him. He reached into the bag and pulled something out which was covered in a black bag.

Max Kael: Last week I once again debuted the UAD Title.. unfortunately it was destroyed later on by jealous weirdo’s fat head. But just the same this event is almost as much important. In fact I would dare say it is pretty much as important.. for this.. is the CORONATION OF MAX KAEL!

More boos erupt from the crowd as he pulls a gold crown with a large M on the center of it from the bag. He looks down at it with adoring eyes as he polishes it for a moment before he looks back up at the crowd around him.

Max Kael: By the power invested in me by the people of Maxopotamia.. by the blessings of the Kael and by the will of worthy.. I formally arise to the Position of Prime Minister of Maxopotamia, a leader of the people..

He lifted the crown and set it upon his head as more people bowed. As the crown sat upon his head the arena pyro goes off over his head as confetti and balloons start to fall back down to the crowd similar to when Max gave himself the UAD Title. The spectacle garners further boos from the crowd who feel like Max has, once again, come out here to gloat and waste their time.

Max Kael: Tonight we have once again made history!.. but it is not over yet. There is still more items to cross off the list. Tonight.. I may still take the ICON title home.. I may still be accepted by the A.o.A., with who I would like to reiterate that I do respect, understand and hope to work with them in the future. You people still have a chance to see.. how I shall eclipse Jatt Starr one show at a time! So sit back.. and enjoy the show..

Puritania” by Dimmu Borgir cranks back up as Max poses in the ring with the crown set upon his head. The fans continue to boo him as he moves back to the Road Maxter 8000 and proceeds back up the ramp as the four guards surround it before we cut to break.


AoA Time..

Invincible” by OK Go starts and “Marvelous” Mario Maurako and “Perfect” Paul Paras make their way out onto the stage. Maurako has his new ICON Championship strapped on around his waist, his customized Crimson Stable Title draped over his left shoulder, and his 2×4 in his right hand. Paras stands next to Mario and raises his Cane into the air. Paras has his Blue Custom Stable Title strapped around his waste and the White Stable Title over his shoulder just like Maurako. The duo slowly makes their way to the ring while soaking up the boo’s that rain down on them from the Chicago audience. Perfectly Marvelous climb the steps of the ring and stand side by side on the ring apron where they stop and raise the HOW Stable Championships high into the air. Paras leans in the corner and smirks as Maurako walks to the middle of the ring with the mic.



Maurako: Wow not cool Chicago. I’m glad you brought up Ryan Faze though because I’m going to address that no good piece of shit in a few moments. But first I’d like to start off by celebrating the newest addition to the Argonauts of Awesome. Ladies and Gentlemen I give to you…. THE HOW ICON CHAMPIONSHIP!!!

The fans boo and some throw trash which lands in the ring. Paras walks out of the corner and uses his Singapore Cane and practices his golf swing knocking a cup back out of the ring.

Maurako: As the New ICON Champion I have a few people that I would like to thank. I’d like to start off by thanking Paul for all of his support and Friendship. Secondly I’d like to thank myself, because without me the ICON Title could never have been “Marvelous”.  Finally I guess I owe a thank you to Crow. Crow thank you for coming out here last week and doing what everyone loves to do here in HOW, and that’s lose to a member of the Argonauts of Awesome. A tradition that will continue tonight when I defend this ICON Championship against Max Kael and win the Jatt Starr Group in the Lee Best Invitational Tournament.

Maurako: I would also like to take this time to point out that the Argonauts of Awesome have now held the HOW Stable Titles for 105 days, which oddly enough is the exact amount of time that Crow held this ICON Title which now covers my waist. But unlike Crow and his ICON Title reign, the Stable Titles will see a 106th day with the AoA and beyond.

Chants of Sektor start from the crowd.

Maurako: Oh shove it! He gets his shot at our Stable Titles next week and he’ll get Marvelously Manhandled just like all the other Un-Awesome pieces of trash that Lee or Scottywood has thrown out to this hungry pack of wolves that is the AoA.

Maurako: Speaking of Un-Awesome or Un-Marvelous trash I think it’s time to address this ongoing issue that I seem to have with the “Phenomenal” Ryan Faze. Ryan I know your crippled ass is back there somewhere probably watching the AoA from your wheelchair but why don’t you come down here right now and we can settle our differences right here tonight.

“Phase” by Breaking Benjamin hits and “Phenomenal” Ryan Faze emerges from the back to a loud pop from the crowd.  He stands at the top of the entrance ramp holding a steel chair for insurance as 3 shots of red and silver pyro shoot overhead.  “Faze of HOW” chants break out as he limps his way down to the ring.  He slides through the bottom rope and stands toe-to-toe with the current ICON and Stable Champion.

Maurako: Faze, it was just two short weeks ago that you stood in this very ring with Paul and myself and we introduced you as the newest member of the Argonauts of Awesome. That is until my wife came down to the ring and tried to embarrass me in front of all of my co-workers and fans around the world. So I did what any man would do… I started to beat the piss out of her. That is, until you stopped me. So now my question to you is this. What in the hell were you thinking?

Faze: You know champ, as much as I’d love running around as an Argonaut of Awesome, it’s just not for me.  You see, the “Phenomenal One” doesn’t need to beat the piss out of women to prove how macho, err should I say… MARVELOUS I am.  In fact, I did what I did because that’s what any REAL… man would do.

The fans cheer loudly for Faze as Mario shakes his head.

Maurako: Ah so you’re a real man eh Faze? Well tell me this then. Does a REAL man run around the country with another man’s wife? That’s the REAL reason you stopped me from beating Amanda to a bloody pulp isn’t it? Admit it!

Faze: Mario… the only thing I’ll admit to you is that you’re dumber than you look.  (the crowd pops)  I mean, you’ve seen the photographs haven’t you?  Clearly, you don’t have the brains to realize that those photos were doctored.

Maurako: Please, why would I doctor any photos of my wife Amanda and you? If you want to know what I think, I think that if anyone doctored those photos it was you. Think about it, a rookie to HOW such as yourself is out here looking to make a name for himself. You failed when you could have won the HOW World Heavyweight Championship from Graystone, and now I think you’re just out looking to start shit with The Marvelous One to make your ass famous.

Faze: Triple M, if I wanted to be famous, I would’ve gone a few rounds with your wife already. 

Mario’s face turns beet red as he gets in Ryan’s face but Faze lifts up the chair as a subtle reminder. 

Faze: Relax Mario… relax.  I didn’t bang Amanda.  I think I have proven over the course of my time here that I’m not like that.  Although, as far banging goes…I have a better idea…Amanda would like you to have this.

Mario’s eyes widen as Faze blasts him in the jaw with a right hand, then rears back and nails Triple M over the head with the steel chair as the crowd roars in approval.  Triple P steps toward Faze, but gets met with a chair shot to his head as well.  Faze raises the chair into the air over the reeling Perfectly Marvelous as the fans go wild and Faze’s theme music plays.

Joe Hoffman: Ryan Faze just got some revenge on Triple M for what he did to Amanda!  The Stable Champions have been laid out, thanks to a steel chair-wielding Faze!

Benny Newell: Faze spent the whole week with Amanda and DIDN’T knock her up?  What a tool…

Joe Hoffman: The photos were doctored!  You can’t even drink anymore and you still can’t see how obvious… wait a minute!!

Before Joe can finish his sentence, Faze gets blasted with another steel chair from behind and collapses to the mat!  The fans begin to boo loudly as Faze’s attacker stands over him.

Joe Hoffman: It’s CHRISTOPHER AMERICA!  What is he doing out here?!?

Sure enough, Christopher America stands in the middle of the ring, holding a steel folding chair emblazoned with the American flag.  He raises the chair into the air and screams “FOR AMERICA!!!” as the Chicago fans rain down boos.  America reaches down and picks Faze up off the mat, but Faze fights back with right hands, getting the crowd back into the action.  America tries to hit an American clothesline on Faze, but the Phenomenal One ducks and locks America’s arms behind him and twists him around for the Fazeplant.  Before he can hit the move, he is CRACKED in the face with a Singapore cane shot by Triple P!  Paras nails Faze in the forehead four more times, each hit of the cane making a louder snapping noise, causing the crowd to “oohhhhh” with each shot.  Triple M stands up from the mat, checking the top of his head for blood, then rushes over and clips Faze from behind with a chop block to his bad knee, sending the Phenomenal One to the mat, writhing in pain.

Joe Hoffman: This is turning into a gang beating by the AoA and Christopher America!

The fans continue to boo what they are seeing as Maurako and America drag Faze over to the corner, straddling his legs around the ring post.  Faze tries to fight back, but Paras nails him in the face with the cane yet again.  Triple M crosses Faze’s legs, then leverages himself into a Figure-Four Leg lock around the ring post, bending Faze’s knee in an unnatural direction.  Faze screams out in intense pain as Paras drives the Singapore cane down over his throat, holding him to the mat.  Christopher America stares at his star-spangled chair and pledges allegiance as the crowd yells profanities at him.  He then winds up and SMASHES the chair against Faze’s exposed knee on the ring post!!

Joe Hoffman: NO!!  America just destroyed Faze’s knee!  He doesn’t deserve this!!

America continues to smash Faze in the knee with the chair until he has hit him once for each of the original 13 American colonies.  After the 13th shot, Maurako lets go of the hold and Paras kicks Faze’s body out of the ring as HOW medical staff rushes down to the ring to tend to the damage.  America and Maurako climb into the ring as Triple P grabs a microphone and Triple M grabs another mic and the white Stable Title belt from the mat.

Paras: Ladies and ignoramuses, thank you for joining us for AoA’s special presentation of “The Destruction of the Phenomenal Farce!”  Faze would be out later to sign autographed copies of this production, but I wouldn’t count on him being able to walk for a while.

Maurako: Faze, you want to be a real man?  You want to be famous?  Well, consider yourself officially famous—you’ll be forever known as the first man to be Awesomely Annihilated by the NEWEST MEMBER of the Argonauts of Awesome!

America: …IN AMERICA!!

Perfectly Marvelous present Christopher America with the third Stable Title belt, solidifying his membership into the AoA as the fans lambaste the group with boos.  EMTs carry Faze off on a stretcher as the Argos taunt him from the ring.  We cut to another area of the arena…


No longer ICONIC?

Cameras open up backstage, immediately Crow can be seen pacing about his room, Joey sitting aside him watching him, Crow seems furious if anything.

Joe Hoffman: Crow, not looking happy about losing his ICON title.

Joey: Calm down dude, it’s not going to help.

Crow stops and stares.

Crow: I’m a fucking figure here in HOW, I’m that fucker you fear in the closet, not a guy who loses to a roided Pauly Shore wannabe.

Crow paces some more and turns again.

Crow: I want my belt back, I have to do this!

Joey: Why man? Why this extreme?

Crow: I need to prove a point..

Joey: WHAT POINT? Your Crow, second longest reigning ICON champion, almost undefeated, a man people fear right now, what the fuck have you got to prove?

Crow: They fear me, but they don’t see me, I’m going to make everyone see me, I think it’s about time I show them the real monster inside of me!

Crow pauses, Joey looks upset it’s come to whatever there talking about.

Crow: Tonight!

Joe Hoffman: What the hell’s happening tonight?

Joey reacts with a shocked and regretful look, clearly showing something big will happen tonight, but what?

Action goes to commercial break as up next its Issac Slade taking on LOD member Silent Witness!!


Silent Witness vs. Issac Slade
Singles Match

Back live from commercial break..

Issac Slade is already in the ring warming up, seemingly ready for anything. Hoffman mentions that Issac Slade made huge waves in HOW with the win over Sektor last week, and his interaction with Darkwing has him wondering if Slade is looking to send a message to the Hall Of Famer using Silent Witness.

Big Buff comments that anything Slade does is boring and he cant beat two LOD members back to back, even though LOD ‘sucks dick’. He also reminds the people at home that Silent Witness isn’t the legend he thinks he is but should be able to handle the noob.

Hoffman goes on to add that Silent Witness is trying to rebuild a legacy in the LSD division unmatched by anyone.

The bell rings and the two men lock up, Witness gaining the early advantage with a side headlock followed by a quick headlock takedown, but Slade almost immediately uses a leg scissor counter to force Witness to break the hold.

Hoffman comments that Witness looks more focused this week and determined.

The two men trade a few holds until Slade nails Witness with a right hand and takes over from there.

Slade works the former LSD champion over with punches and forearm shots, and then hits a hard fireman’s carry takedown into an armlock which grounds SW.

Hoffman notes the armhold is applied expertly and Witness may have a hard time getting out, dispite the size advantage Witness has.

Witness manages to turn into the hold using brute strength, and Slade makes his first mistake of the match by whipping SW into the ropes and lowering his head too early for a backbody drop, which SW utilizing veteran presence nails a hard DDT as a counter!

SW covers, but only picks a 2 count from the ref.

SW begins to work on Slade, connecting with a short-arm clothesline then a variation of suplexes, the last one a hard belly to back suplex and you can almost hear the air knocked out of Slades lungs. Witness covers….



The ref says Slade got the shoulder up in time.

Hoffman notes that Slade may have been outclassed here, and cannot overcome the experience difference. Big Buff begins to reply but back in the ring, Witness locks in THE SILENCER, his variation of the Sharpshooter.

Slade is scrambling for an escape, but Witness has him trapped dead center in the ring.  Hoffman says Slade may have to tap out.

Witness has it in tight, and Slade cant even inch himself and the larger man to the ropes. Slade extends an arm towards the referee as if he is about to tap, and his hand slams down into the mat!

Hoffan goes apeshit as always thinking Slade is about to pound the mat to tap, but instead Slade reaches back and pushes on the left ankle and leg of Witness, forcing SW to lose leverage and footing, and SW falls forward, and Slade manages to break free.

Hoffman exclaims that hes out and that that was a very un-noob like counter, and Big Buff takes a sip of Hennessy.

SW goes again for THE SILENCER, but Slade kicks him away. Slade manages to get up, favoring the back. SW charges in, but gets countered with a knee to the gut. Slade nails a snap swinging neckbreaker, then in a flash is on the top rope.

Hoffman notes that Slade is hurting from THE SILENCER still and is taking a longer time to get his bearings for his finisher, THE FREEFALL.

Slade leaps off the top rope…..FREEFALL…..



The fans go apeshit chanting and ‘LETS GO WITNESS, LETS GO SLADE’ chants can be heard.

The ref utilizes a 10 count…..1……..2………..3………4

Slade is favoring the midsection now….He manages to crawl to the ropes and uses them to get to one knee as SW is also on one knee.


Slade gets to his feet, leaps to the top rope in one bound, motioning for Witness to turn around….Witness gets to his feet, and turns, still suffereing a bit fom the neckbreaker, and Slade leaps off, looking for either a seated senton or perhaps a flying leg scissors.


Witness has him in the air, and lowers Slade to the mat, holding onto the legs, and sits down into a boston crab! Slade is wriggling and yelling in pain, SW shakes his head, and steps out of the crab, pulls slade to his feet, and hits a knee to the gut, then steps behind, and applies the SILENT NIGHT!

Hoffman goes apeshit again as the fans are now supporting Witness firmly, and Benny isn’t even watching now, he is too busy trying to find the cap for his bottle of Hennessy.

Slade is being put to sleep, and is wandering around the ring, but Witness is keeping him from the ropes, but suddenly he dives towards the nearest  corner, causing Witness to fall forward as well, and Witness hits his head into a turnbuckle, breaking the hold, and pops back to his feet, dazed.  Slade gets up, shakes the cobwebs free and gets to his feet, goes to Witness, turns him around, kicks him in the gut, going for sometype of powerbomb, but Witness counters into a double-leg takedown, then goes for the SILENCER again, but Slade somehow counters that attempt into an inside cradle!!!!!









Witness kicks out too late, and Mike Shea calls for the bell!!!




The fans go crazy for Slade as Slade slides out the ring, trying to catch his breath. Witness cant believe he has lost, he is arguing his case to the ref who explains the call.

Hoffman says that this is a huge win, possibly even bigger than the win over Sektor as Witness hasnt had nearly as long a lay off from the ring.

Big Buff states that Slade is still a noob and Witness is washed up. Hoffman sends us to commercial saying that Slade still has a long way to go and possibly a large mountain to climb in the form of Hall Of Famer Darkwing.



It’s Not Over!!!

Crow walks out of his locker room. He’ walks through the halls with an air to him. As he turns the corner he is met with a chair to the face. The person continues to slam the chair onto him as he falls. We see the culprit is Bobbinette Carey. Olivia is standing behind her shaking in fear. He looks for an exit seeing both ends of the halls are blocked off by David Black and Dylan Nitro.

Bobbinette: You took her for months! YOU Bastard!

Bobbinette says screaming at crow lifting the chair and bringing it down on him.

Bobbinette: You thought I would let you get away with it? I will make you bleed for all the pain you caused her. You’ll never get her again.

She says with hate as she slams his side with the chair.

Bobbinette: You’re going to know what it’s like to be the victim!

By this point officials rush the scene. Bobbinette drops the chair on crow and grabs Livie’s hand and walks away. Bobbinette adjusts her hair on her face and fixes her outfit seeming calm now. Bobbinette steps over Crow’s body and pulls Livie’s hand who is shaking as she walks past her abductor as the action returns to ringside where Joe lets the viewers know that David Black has purchased some time in the ring and he is coming out now!!

Setting the tone..

“World’s Greatest” by R Kelly hits the arena as David Black walks out from the backstage, area dressed in a pair of jeans, a white t-shirt, a black leather jacket and a pair of red tinted shades. He makes his way down the entrance ramp, and quickly runs up the steel steps and enters the ring through the ropes.

He looks around at the crowd for a few seconds before asking for and receiving a mic.

David: You know, ever since I originally joined up with Bobbinette Carey, back when I became a member of what was then known as Team Epic, people have been talking about how I didn’t exactly “fit the bill” of a Team Epic member, and now that I have chosen to join up with Bobbinette Carey and Dylan Nitro as part of the Knights of Epicness, people are talking about Bobbinette’s alleged lack of leadership abilities. Well the thing about that is, I tend to trust my own judgment a heck of a lot more than I trust a bunch of strangers, and let’s not forget that the very same people who are badmouthing Bobbinette’s ability to lead, are mostly the same people who are praising Lee Best every chance they get.

David lowers the mic and pauses as the crowd boo’s at the mention of Lee Best.

David: Now I’m not denying that Lee Best has done a terrific job building up this company, making High Octane Wrestling what it is today, but this is also the same man who likes to, on what seems to be a regular basis, stab people in the eye with a pen. THAT is what they consider good leadership?…They also claim that Bobbinette Carey is mentally unstable, infact, when it comes to Bobbinette, there seems to be no shortage of insults flying around, but lets stick with this “mentally unstable” for a minute, shall we? See, it seems to me that, say, stabbing people in the eye, sounds like something that an unstable person would do. And it seems to me, that kidnapping innocent girls, is something that an unstable person would do. Both of these things have been done in High Octane Wrestling, neither of them by Bobbinette Carey, and yet SHE is the one who is being accused of being unstable?…Okay, I’m not really surprised by that, with things like these you always have to consider the source, or in this case, the sources, and the sources in this case, are narrow minded, hate filled, morons who couldn’t have an original thought of their own even if their life depended on it.

The fans cheer.

David: Now I’m sure you are all wondering by now; ” Why the heck is this guy standing here, telling us things we already know?”…Well I’ll tell you why, ever since I signed my contract here, from the first moment I set foot inside a High Octane Wrestling ring, I have noticed the willingness and eagerness to take shots at Bobbinette Carey. It seems that people can’t wait to get in line to be the next to throw insults her way, and when new people come here, they automatically pick up on it and do the same, why? Well because all of the so called cool kids are doing it. So I asked myself, why? What is up with this whole thing, and why are people so determined, so deadset on insulting her? And why are they so excited to be doing so? I mean, I’m pretty sure more than a few of them get off on it…

David smiles, as laughter can be heard from the fans.

David: Well I know why, at least I think I do…now I am by no means an expert in psychology, but having given this some thought and coming up with nothing else, this, to me, seems like the only possible conclusion. So what is my conclusion you ask? Well you see, the reason why all of this is happening, the reason for this Bobbinette Carey hatred that seems to be not only allowed but encouraged and rewarded, is that she is, A; a woman, and B; Fully capable of kicking butt. Now if you put A and B together, that makes Bobbinette Carey one tough chick, who can and have beaten the vast majority of people on this roster….so what you have here, is a bunch of men who’s ego couldn’t handle losing to a woman and, much like little boys who just rejected by the hot girl at school, they start making up stories, lies and throwing insults her way.

David shakes his head.

David: Just this past week, we had Scottywood actually blasting Bobbinette for putting her sister, her KIDNAPPED sister, ahead of her career, citing that as a reason for her being a bad leader…you know, part of being a GOOD leader, is having your priorities straight, knowing what’s important, and if Bobbinette had put her career ahead of her sister, THEN she would have been a bad leader, but she didn’t, and she’s not! Anybody that says otherwise, well they are wrong and the fact that they would even think that…well I’d say that’s a comment on their intelligence, as in lack of intelligence.

David lowers the mic and pauses.

David: And now it’s time for that classic, bottom line, here’s the deal kind of moment. The reason I came out here, the reason I said the things I just said, is so that you all understand where I’m coming from with this….and also, it just pretty much needed to be said. Anyway, in these times of “Bobbinette bashing”, I have come out here to say something that, undoubtedly, will be an unpopular statement…and when I say statement, it is actually both and statement but it is also something I’d like to give to Bobbinette, and I could have said this to her backstage, but I wanted it to be said here, for the whole roster and the whole world to see, because what I came out here to give Bobbinette Carey… a vote of confidence….MY vote of confidence!

David is cut off as the fans cheer again.

David: I trust Bobbinette Carey to have my back, as I hope she trusts me to have hers, and that’s pretty much all there is to it.

David then drops the mic and “World’s Greatest” hits again, as David exits the ring and heads towards the backstage area again as Joe takes Mayhem to another commercial break as up next its Maximillian Kael taking on MMM for the ICON Championship!!


Best Intentions

Back from commercial and we are inside the Best Alliance office where Lee Best is sitting on top of his desk with a very large briefcase full of money sitting wide open next to him. Blaze, Static, and Scottywood are standing beside Lee….

The Best Alliance in full force?

Lee Best: Before we get to the ICON title match I just wanted to let everyone know out there that although I know that fucking cunt Carey is the current high bidder for the other 50% of HOW….she is not going to win.

Lee starts laughing and picks up a bundle of cash from the briefcase and tosses it over to Blaze. He then tosses one to Static and Scottywood as well and each member of the Best Alliance begins thumbing through the cash.

Lee Best: You see this money we are holding is money that was just handed to me literally within the last hour. I couldn’t believe it myself but money talks and I fucking listened. As you all heard earlier the Investors bought out the remaining time of their contract for a nice sum and to have this briefcase show up ontop of that…well I dare ANYONE to try and out bid me now.

Lee tosses his bundle of money back into the briefcase and stares intently into the camera as Blaze and Scotty begin stuffing their pockets with cash behind their boss’s back.

Lee Best: HOW is mine. I created it and I will be the one that will destroy it. I am the reason all of you have the CHANCE to bid on this great company. Without ME there would be no company to bid on. Remember that all you fucksticks that are debating on who to donate your cash to. Just look at the good I have already done with the bailout money from the investors. I am getting rid of the HOTv screen and replacing it with our old High Octane Vision..or HOV.. screen and before he failed his fucking drug test I secured Graystone to a brand new contract that made him the highest paid wrestler here in HOW. And lets not forget the big fish…

Lee smiles and leans forward…

Lee Best: Jatt is back and he is going to be back in black as he will put on this Best Alliance shirt and will lead us all the way to War Games. Nothing in HOW is going to be safe now with my Best Alliance growing stronger with each and every passing week…and next week….its going to get Jattacular.

Lee begins laughing as the HOTv goes black and the action returns to ringside for the start of the ICON match.

ICON Title Match
Max Kael vs. Mario Maurako

Singles Match

The action returns to ringside where because of Lee Best’s segment we missed the entrances for the ICON Champion and contender. Triple M is obviously very upset about this as he is still bitching to Amy Smeets, the ring announcer, about the lack of respect from Lee.

Joe wonders out loud if Lee did that segment just then on purpose to take away from the two former Best Alliance members inside the ring.

Benny, who is almost thru a second straight show without drinking, could care less about the damn entrances and he wants to know who the hell gave Lee the briefcase of money so he can buy that man or woman a drink.

Senior HOW referee Matt Boettcher holds the ICON title high in the air as Triple M gives his Stable title to a HOW crewmen and turns to look at his challenge who is holding out his hand in a show of respect, which brings a smile to Mario’s face.

Benny pretends like he is going to puke as Max and Mario actually do shake hands and Boettcher signals for the bell and this ICON Title match is officially underway.

Champion and Challenger lock up and its Max who comes away with the early advantage as nails MMM with a nasty European uppercut and after a few more he has knocked the ICON Champion to the turnbuckle where Boettcher asks for and receives a clean break from Max.

Joe reminds the viewers that earlier in the week on the High Octane Radio show, Kael was very supportive of the AoA and it is obvious here right now in the match as Max is showing nothing BUT respect here in this pivotal ICON title match.

Benny claims that this shit needs to stop as this is also an Invitational match and if MMM wins he clinches a spot in the final four….joining Triple P and Blaze.

Joe points out that Triple P does have one more match and if he were to lose then it would be Kostoff and Paras tied for the Group crown and it would come down to some form of a tiebreaker.

Back to the action inside the ring and MMM has just caught Max with a wicked Spinebuster that leads into the first near fall of the match as Max tries to catch his breath.

The bigger man, Mario, begins to throw Max around the ring…literally.

The ICON and Stable Champion nails Max with several different suplexs and gets several n ear falls along the way as the crowd is almost silent in this match as they are not sure who to root for but it’s obvious that Max has more fanfare than the Minnesota native.

Max is finally able to turn the tide after floating thru another suplex attempt and nailing MMM with a nasty implant DDT.

Max makes the cover and places his feet on the bottom rope and Boettcher starts the count..






Max pulls MMM up after his conscience obviously got to him as he doesn’t want to win via cheating. The crowd is stunned by this and so is Benny who claims that he never really knew Max now after see the man pass up on the ICON title because of some morals.

Max is able to stay on the offensive however as he nails Mario with a running knee strike that gets him a near fall.

The action goes back and forth for several minutes as each wrestler is unable to put any kind of serious offence together as both Kael and Maurako seem to know what is coming from the other.

Triple M is finally able to regain the advantage with a beautiful Belly to Belly suplex.

From there it is all Mario as the Stable and ICON champion really works over the upper body of Max with various suplexs and submission holds.

Finally Mario is able to lock in his full nelson finisher called Marvelosity and the crowd jumps to their feet as the end of the match is near.

Max struggles and struggles but is unable to break the phone. He even has a chance to gouge the eyes of Mario but for some reason he refuses and instead tries to make it to the ropes.

Little by little Max is able to get closer until the point where the top rope is within grasp and it is at this point that Mario turns Max and nails him with a rock bottom out of no where and covers..







Maurako pounds the mat in frustration and picks up Kael and goes for his Super Mario slam but Max is able to counter and nails MMM with a quick bulldog followed by a wicked kick to the back of the head of Mario which makes Max coil as he realizes that was the wrong thing to do.

Max helps Mario to his feet and is met with a right hand for his efforts.

Over the next several minutes Mario is all about the upper body of Max has he works in several more suplexs and submission holds.

The action spills outside however as Max rolled to gather himself. Mario quickly follows suit and only a few minutes later Max is bleeding as he just ate the ring steps several times.

Mario enters the ring a few times to break up the count and each time he comes back Kael is unable to or refuses to fight and MMM keeps on him.

Finally he rolls him back into the ring and after another Super Mario and several other high impact moves, Mario signals for his finisher again and locks it in deeply as Kael struggles in the full nelson position.

Joe and Benny are amazed by how much Max is taking here and Benny claims its only a matter of time before new AoA member America makes his way down.

But there is no time for that as Max struggles to the turnbuckle as MMM cinches in deeper with the hold as the crowd is all on their feet.

Suddenly Max jumps up and pushes off the top rope, sending himself and Mario backwards towards the mat and the momentum sees Max roll backward, pinning the shoulders of Mario down on the mat.

Boettcher makes the count…







Mario struggles…





The crowd is stunned as is Mario as he jumps up to his knees and begins going crazy at Boettcher. Max is in shock as he is handed the ICON Championship belt and he holds it high in the air before holding out his hand for Mario to shake it.

Mario doesn’t however and instead just exits the ring leaving in the ring with the ICON Championship as Joe points out that Max just beat MMM with a very CANADIAN move.

As a stunned Max stands with the ICON Championship in the ring the action cuts to the backstage area.


Backstage the scene cuts to two crew members talking to one another and one is holding the HOW World title.

Crew member 1: I wonder what’s going to happen to this now?

The other crew member takes the title from him and puts it over his shoulder. His face is beaming with pride as he imitates being a champion.

Crew member 2: Look’s pretty good huh?

Fans from the arena begin cheering as Sektor appears on the screen, and gets into the mans face who is holding the title. The two men gawk at Sektor nervously as he gives them both a cold look. Sektor quickly snatches the World title off the shoulder of the crew member and puts it on his own. He then turns and looks as though he is about to make his way to the ring.


World Title clarified..

Back live and the scene cuts to the arena where “Live your Life” by T.I ft Rihanna blasts out. The fans jump to their feet in a roaring ovation as Sektor walks out dressed for action and carrying the HOW World title over his shoulder.

Benny Newell: Is this guy for real? Does he actually think he can just pick up the World title and become champion just like that? I can see a bottom line happening here tonight.

Joe Hoffman: Perhaps he’s thinking that he is the rightful candidate as he never lost the title himself when he was champion.

Benny Newell: That was two fucking years ago, he couldn’t be champion now if the roster consisted of arthritis sufferers.

Sektor rolls into the ring and collects a microphone which is handed to him by the ring announcer. He then signals for his music to be cut and gets right down to business.

Sektor: As you all saw earlier tonight, your supposed HOW World Champion Graystone failed the drug and alcohol test on multiple counts. Therefore as Kostoff promised last week, the World title has been stripped from him.

The fans let out a cheer.

Sektor: With that being said there’s already a lot of questions being asked backstage as to what is going to happen to this title now that it has been vacated. The most rational scenario would be for me to take the championship and reign as your World champion as I never lost it when I was last here.

Sektor gets a mixed response for this idea. He moves over to the ropes and drapes the World title over them, stepping backwards with his eyes fixed on the gold. He then turns his attention back to the crowd.

Sektor: That’s not going to happen!

Some boo’s are heard from the crowd.

Benny Newell: Yeah because Lee won’t allow it ya dumbass!

Sektor: You see as much as I want to be champion again it just wouldn’t feel right simply taking it. It’s an old cliché but its my belief that in order to feel like a champion you have to earn it! So therefore I propose a challenge. Graystone I know you’re probably out of the arena by now but I’m sure you’ll see this eventually. I’m sick of talking about you and I having a match. I thought I might finally get my hands on you properly this week in the main event but it looks as though your suspension is going to prevent that. How convenient. That being said let’s stop beating about the bush. You made it clear last week with your sucker punch attack that you want a piece of me as well, so when your suspension is lifted let’s get to it! I’ve spoken to Kostoff and he’s ready for this match to take place. With the title up for grabs let’s have John Sektor versus Graystone for the High Octane Wrestling World Title!

The fans cheer wildly at this idea.

Joe Hoffman: The match we’ve all been waiting for, could this actually happen?

Benny Newell: Not a fucking chance.

Where’s your Head At” By Basement Jaxx hits as Sektor stands in the ring confused. The camera cuts up to the top of the ramp where Thomas Clayton Gray III emerges from the backstage area with a microphone. The crowd lets out a mixed reaction as TCG3 stands, staring dead into the eyes of Sektor. The music cuts off, as TCG3 stands staring. A light “Na na na… hey hey hey… goodbye starts up.”

TCG3: Sektor… Ever since you came back to the HOW, you have been wining and complaining that that World title is rightfully yours. You’ve been telling the whole world that you never lost it like the fans have somehow forgotten. And then tonight, after Graystone has been suspended and stripped of the title for failing the drug test, you come out here and say that you want to have a match with him? You want to call someone out after you know they’re not going to be around?

TCG3 starts walking down the aisle, shaking his head in dissapointment.

TCG3: You make me sick, Sektor. This just goes to show the lows that the Legion of Darkness, and Sektor in particular, is willing to go.

TCG3 walks up the ring steps and over to the World Title and pulls it off the ropes. Sektor watches him carefully as he steps into the ring between the ropes.

TCG3: You see, Sektor… The truth of the matter is… this is as close as you will ever be to the HOW World Heavyweight Championship.

Joe Hoffman: What is that supposed to mean?

TCG3: You see… Sektor… you are trying to hold onto the spotlight that you once had. But Sektor, that’s the past. There’s no going back. You have to create a new spotlight for yourself…. And you can make a new spotlight for yourself… You can become one of the greatest superstars of all time… If you join me.

The crowd lets out a boo, as TCG3 stands waiting for a response. Sektor looks out to the crowd and they shout back at him “no” and “don’t do it.” Sektor walks up to TCG3, sternly.

Sektor: Join you? The man that managed Graystone straight into a drug suspension and got him stripped of the HOW World Title? The man that sold his soul to The Best Alliance? Thomas… I will never join you.

The crowd lets out a cheer, as TCG3 crooks his mouth, sinisterly.

TCG3: You know Sektor… It’s too bad that you’re never going to get to see your little girl… Because I wish she could see how truly pathetic her father is.

The crowd lets out a loud “OH.”

Joe Hoffman: Oh my god… I cannot believe he just said that.

Sektor’s face turns grim, and he rears back and punches TCG3 right in the jaw. TCG3 crumples to the mat, as the fans are on their feet cheering.

Benny Newell: He can’t do that!

Suddenly, Graystone slides into the ring with a chair, and runs towards Sektor, but Sektor turns around just in time and delivers a kick to Graystone’s stomach. Graystone drops the chair, and the two men begin exchanging punches back and forth, lefts and rights.

Joe Hoffman: It’s on! The battle is on!

Finally, Sektor gains the upper hand and attempts his C-Sektion finisher, but Graystone manages to duck out of the way and slide out of the ring. TCG3 is up on his knees with a scowl on his face. Sektor runs in towards him, but Graystone grabs TCG3’s arm, and pulls him out, as TCG3 grabs the World title. Sektor kicks at TCG3, but to no avail as both men are out of the ring, making their way up the ramp.

Joe Hoffman: What in the world is going on here?

The camera cuts to TCG3, who now has microphone in his hand at a safe distance. TCG3 clutches the World Championship to his chest.

TCG3: Sektor… Damnit… You honestly think that Graystone failed the drug test? Well you’re wrong!

Benny Newell: Ahahaha! What did I tell you Hoffman! It was all a work!

The crowd begins to boo, as they know that they’ve been duped.

TCG3: Graystone is not suspended… and he is not stripped of his World Championship. You had the opportunity to be a part of the greatest stable of all time… But if you won’t join us… Then we will stop at nothing to destroy you. And as far as you EVER getting a chance to wrestle for the HOW World Championship… Well…

Suddenly, Graystone snatches the microphone out of TCG3’s hands. TCG3 looks confused.

Graystone: YOU’RE ON!

Joe Hoffman: Oh my God! Sektor vs. Graystone for the HOW World Championship!

Benny Newell: Graystone’s insane!

Joe takes Mayhem to its final commercial break as the parties in the ring slowly disperse as the crowd is still shocked that the match has been agreed upon!



The cameras cut backstage where Blaze is seen walking towards his locker room. He pushes the door open and stops dead in his tracks once inside, as he see’s a giant ‘Z’ that is spraypainted on the wall of his locker room and there is a knife jammed into the wall, holding a note. Blaze pulls the knife out of the wall and reads the note. He then throws the note on the floor and leaves the locker room again, slamming the door behind him. The camera moves in on the note, making the writing readable


The screen then goes dark and the cameras cut back to the ring.

Bobbinette Carey & David Black vs. Darkwing & Sektor vs. Graystone & Scottywood
Triple Threat Tag Team Match

We return to ringside where the Legion of Darkness are standing in the ring waiting, the Best Alliance’s music kicks in and both Graystone and Scottywood come walking out with gold draped over there shoulders, Big Buff is standing up clapping.

Joe Hoffman: What the hell you doing?

Benny Newell: Stand up Joe, stand up and give these men the applaud they deserve for tonight.

Benny drags Joe to his feet but Joe refuses, he tidies up his suit and tie and sits back down looking annoyed, Benny sits as the Best Alliance enter the ring. But as soon as they do, eruption explodes straight away as bad words move into swapping fists as Graystone battles with Sektor and Scottywood tries to fight off Darkwing. Immediately Mike Shea panics as he looks to the aisle for the third team, and on queue without music, Bobbinette Carey and David Black come pacing down the ramp with some speed.

Benny Newell: Who invited that whore?

Joe Hoffman: She’s in the match?

The crowd are going wild, Graystone gets beat into the corner, Scottywood fights off Darkwing and chucks him over the ropes, Scotty goes to help Graystone but Carey and Black spin him around from behind. Scotty looks shocked, he panics but as he stalls, he gets a double kick to the gut, they double suplex him over, and Sektor turns around only to receive a right from Carey and a kick from Black. Black sends him running into the turn-buckle and whips Carey off and she lands a running boot to Sektor’s face, he immediately wobbles and stumbles out only to be taken down with a huge lariat.

Black covers.. Shea counts..


Quick kick out by Sektor, holding his head as he rises, Carey lays the boot to Graystone.

Joe Hoffman: The Knights of Epicness taking this thing by storm, the Best Alliance and Legion of Darkness not faring too well so far.

Benny Newell: Do you want to get fired? The Best Alliance is the best thing HOW has going for it, these wannabes are a disease to this company.

Scotty is up and pulls Carey off Graystone, he lands a few hard rights, but Darkwing is back in the ring and pull Scotty off her, Black continues the response and pulls back Darkwing, Carey drops to her knees and Black drop kicks Darkwing. Darkwing falls backwards and trip over Carey, falling into Scotty, Scotty stumbles and falls back, now crushing Graystone in the corner and is yet to get up.

Benny Newell: This is wrong, our HOW World champion tricks us all into believing his game, and then stands strong as a champion by accepting Sektor’s undeserving challenge, and this is how he gets treated?

Joe Hoffman: What do you expect, ruby slippers?

The crowd cheer at the unfortunate start of the match from the Best Alliance, Shea manages to get things in order though, he orders Black out of the ring, then Sektor and Graystone and Scotty roll out on there own leaving Carey with Darkwing. Carey lifts him up and after a few rights sends him off the ropes, she goes for a huge super kick, Darkwing ducks and spins around, he picks Carey up and slams her hard with a massive spine buster, he covers but Black threatens to enter and Darkwing gets up smiling. He pulls Carey to her feet and hits a few hard elbows, he lifts her up and power slams her into the mat, runs off the ropes, comes back and elbow drops her, he covers, but AGAIN sees Black swing a leg in ready and backs off once again pulling Carey to her feet. He lands a few hard rights and leaves her wobbling in the centre of the ring, he runs and spring boards off the ropes, hoping for a clothesline, Carey out of nowhere back bridges and ducks it causing Darkwing to land face first into the mat.

Benny Newell: Our World Champion is up!!!

With that Scottywood comes running into the ring arguing, distracting everyone, Graystone takes advantage running around the ring and yanks Sektor off the apron, he lands a few hard rights and smashes his head into the ring post.

Benny Newell: Genius, GENIUS! By our World Champion!!!

Graystone whips Sektor into the guard rail, but smartly Sektor stops himself and turns, only for Graystone to take advantage and running big boot him in the face.

Benny Newell: Only from our…

Joe Hoffman: World Champion?

Benny Newell: Shut the fuck up Joe!

Carey and Scottywood are now going at it, the ref gives up with the tag team system and waves his hands clean, letting things go. Black sees this and sees Darkwing getting up, Black climbs up to the top turn-buckle and leaps off, hoping to go for a drop-kick Darkwing reverses and catches Black dropping him down REAL HARD with a huge power bomb. Darkwing goes to cover, but as he bends down, Scotty runs behind booting Darkwing in the butt after disposing of Carey, sending Darkwing flying out the ring, Scotty makes a sneak cover.












NO! Dazed, but not out, Black’s eyes roll to the back of his head as he tries seeing straight, Scotty brings him up, Graystone rolls in the ring to join him. Carey is also up and tries defending Black but Graystone beats her to the floor, picks her back up, and after a hard elbow, and a stiff hard kick lands a spinning neck breaker on Carey. Graystone puts his attention on Black as Scotty lands a few rights, the two send him off the ropes, they go for a double backdrop but like a hurdle, Black leaps them, and they get confused and rise, only to be dropped to the floor with a double bulldog.


Joe Hoffman: Are you a member of the ‘I hate Carey’ website?

Benny Newell: There’s a website?

Sektor is crawling back in the ring, blood covering his face, clearly from the cheap assault from Graystone earlier, Black sees him and stands guard, but the only thing in Sektor’s eyes in Graystone, and he mounts him and immediately goes to work on him. The crowd go wild, Black ignores him and catches Darkwing on the way in, Darkwing goes for a big right, Black dodges and counters with a kick to the gut, Darkwing tries a back fist, Black ducks, only to deliver his own back fist to the back of Darkwing’s head, Darkwing gets frustrated and tries pouncing at Black only to be booted in the balls sending Darkwing crashing to his knees. Black panics as he looks for the ref who’s distracted by Scottywood setting Carey up for a pile driver, Black wipes his head in relief and shoves Darkwing away by the head.

Benny Newell: And you say the Best Alliance is that? That was despicable!

Joe Hoffman: I’m not condoning it Benny!

Black quickly steps in and stops Scottywood from pile driving Carey, Carey responds and back body drops Scotty, but OVER the ropes as he lands hard on the outside floor. Black checks on Carey as Sektor now has Graystone outside the ring weakening him down, Sektor hits an uppercut, a kick to the gut, and another he slaps Gray in the face and follows with a hard elbow, Gray almost falls over, Sektor backs up and then runs at Gray, but out of nowhere Graystone responds and drop toe holds Sektor face first into the steel steps. Inside Darkwing is up, still holding his crotch, Carey grabs him lands a few rights, backs off and smashes a massive super kick into his face, he doesn’t fall, he collapses into the turn-buckle and falls back out, only to have Black come running in with a HUGE knee to his face, dropping him to the mat.

Benny Newell: Get em’ Graystone!

Gray comes in, Black has just dropped Darkwing and Graystone takes advantage smacking Carey in the face, she gets pissed and responds with her own, the two swap punches, Carey wins the war and starts backing him off. Meanwhile Scotty comes into the ring, and not even noticing he comes behind Carey, and low blows her, but not quite the reaction he hoped, he realizes as she turns around with a confused face.

Benny Newell: What the fuck was he thinking? Even if she were a man she’d have no balls!

Joe Hoffman: Scotty must have hit the floor hard before because he’s having a mistake in gender here.

Scotty quickly boots Carey in the gut, lifts her up and hit Game Misconduct, he attempts the cover, but Black in there to the rescue, he punches Scotty, but Gray comes from behind, goes for a right, Black ducks and Gray hits Scotty. Black eye gauges Gray and sends him flying over the ropes, he turns to Scotty and hits the Blackout. Scotty drops like a ton of bricks, Darkwing is up, he comes at Black, but again, the BLACKOUT, Darkwing drops, Sektor’s in the ring, BLACKOUT, Sektor drops, Black’s going wild but out of nowhere Graystone sneaks from behind and rolls Black up.










Black JUST about flips out, Graystone can’t believe it.


Joe Hoffman: How?

Benny Newell: I DON’T KNOW! HE JUST DID!

As they rise he drops Black with a hard right, he follows by clearing the ring, pushing all out cold superstars out the ring except Darkwing as he looks back at Black. He strolls up slowly, Black is back up, Gray meets him with a few hard rights, he sends him off the ropes and hard clotheslines him, he picks him back up, and with a few more rights and lefts, he DDT’s him, but not stopping, he picks him up again, this time hooks him up and drops with a chin breaker with an immediate follow into a power slam. The fans are booing, Graystone drags Black into the corner and signals for the end, calling for the Curse, Graystone grabs the ropes ready, Darkwing is making a move though and grabs the ref to try get up, distracting him, Black manages top pull up and LOW BLOWS Graystone!


Joe Hoffman: I don’t think so..


Graystone is in some pain, Black pushes him up the turn-buckle and follows, he turns and sets him up for a power bomb, and snaps it landing Graystone hard to the mat, he covers.. ref counts..




Gray quickly escapes in some pain, Black stomps away at him, picks him up, fireman carries him into a death valley driver and signals, he sets him up and starts moving off the ropes for the Perfect Elbow. Black lands it in his cocky way, fans cheering and now chanting along with the pin fall as he covers…




Black can’t believe it, he gets up in shock, but Darkwing is up and comes from behind Black and hits a reverse DDT, Black rolls out, Darkwing takes his time but eventually he gets up himself. Graystone is also getting up, all Carey, Scotty, and Sektor are making a move outside the ring, recovering from there victimized finishing moves. Inside the ring, Darkwing lands a right, a left, a right, a left, and again, and again, Darkwing goes to pick him up, but out of nowhere Graystone small packages Darkwing for the cover.. the ref counts.. Carey is up, Sektor is up, Scotty is up..




Sektor slides in, but Scotty grabs his foot stopping him..




Carey groups some energy to rolls in, she panics and scrambles to her feet..




Carey collapses on the two, but only after the pin fall as the ref calls for the bell.




Graystone is handed his title by Scottywood as the two make a quick escape, Carey being helped by Black, Darkwing being helped by Sektor, all watching the Best Alliance leave up the ramp celebrating with smiles and cheers as the fans boo.

Suddenly Chris Kostoff appears on the ramp and the crowd erupts into cheers as Graystone and Scottywood have no idea that he is behind them.

Kostoff charges and nails the two champions from behind with a powerful double clothesline.

Inside the ring the LOD members and the KOE members being brawling again as its complete chaos and then the crowd erupts as Lee Best makes his way out flanked by Blaze and Static. Lee has the briefcase of money in his hand.

Kostoff has Graystone’s world title belt in his hand as he looks up at the rest of the Alliance and smiles as he stands over both the World and LSD Champions.

Everyone in the arena watches as Kostoff charges up at Lee and Blaze and Static get in between Lee and the HOW Hall of Famer.

Even the other LOD members and KOE members have stopped brawling and have started up towards the entrance ramp where Kostoff holds the World Title high up in the air and then drops it at the feet of Blaze and Static.

Blaze picks up the belt and places it over his shoulder as Static rushes by Kostoff to check on Scottywood and Graystone who are just now getting to their feet.

Blaze takes a step back as Lee pats the briefcase with his right hand and then he hands it to Blaze and a moment that will never be forgotten…Mayhem ends….

With Chris Kostoff shaking Lee Best’s hand.



Over powering the PA system, a screeching tone is heard.. fans stop and listen, curious, nothing happens on the big screen, but out of nowhere a HUGE scream is heard belting over the sound system. Nobody can figure out what, but crying and mumbling follows, a woman’s voice is whimpering, asking for help, and then a man’s laughter crowds her cowering pushing any noise from her into the background. Fans continue to listen as the laughing continues, he quietens, the whimpers continue clearly proving a woman crying, scared, but following, a voice..

I told you I’d purchased insurance.. “

The whimpers continue, people guess and sway there ideas.

You fucked with me, you fucked with my title, now it’s time to fuck with you, Mario!”

A mimicking laugh pops out.

Isn’t that right…… Amanda Maurako?”

She cries immediately following as the laughs continue, gasps are heard at ringside as its now clear, Crow lived up to his word, and now has his ‘insurance’ against Triple M.

Show Details

The Best Arena

Chicago, Illinois

Show times

  • 9:00PM