Massacre: March 18th, 2019 (2019)

Weekly Show | 120 Min
Rating:
7/10
7

Show Info

Show Transcript

OCW Presents: Massacre
LIVE! Monday, March 18th 2019
From The OCW Arena in Key West, Florida

~Another Monday night is upon us! The Monday AFTER St. Patrick’s Day…and what a day it was. Green beer…jovial pals…golden tee…a sixty year old woman attempting to throw some game my way (wait, what?). And it’s all led to this…a cold and a hangover. Current Me fucking over Future Me…or, would it now be considered Past Me fucking over Current Me? I don’t know…I just feel like shit. But, hey, that’s okay. There are worse things in life, like AIDS. So, work is over and we just want to chillax on the couch, hoping to feel better by tomorrow. Inside the fridge are several drink options…the sight of beer nearly makes me puke. But the sight of that light blue Gatorade looks pretty alright. So, I grab that and stagger to the couch. It’s inviting cushions wrap me up like a warm hug. I doubt I’ll be moving for a long, long time. Thankfully, the remote is within reach…the television turns on. A few clicks later and STARZ is loud and proud on this way too big, freakishly clear screen. Ben Affleck is doing some weird ass interview about how he believes in time travel and is planning on going back and re-writing Gigli. The things people would waste time travel on. The interview ends and that OCW logo pops up…hell yea! For the first time all day I begin to feel not so shitty. The screen cuts to the sold out OCW Arena! The fans are on their feet…it’s POST Social Justice! There’s so much going on…so much to dive into that the broadcast cuts STRAIGHT to Smith and Hood~

Smith: Hello again everyone and welcome to Monday Night Massacre! I’m your host, Smith and alongside me, as always, is Hood

Hood: Martin

Smith: What?

Hood: I’m illegally changing my name to Martin

Smith: Why

Hood: So I can join the eMpire!

Smith: You couldn’t come up with something better than Martin?

Hood: I considered Manifesto

Smith: Martin is fine. Folks, Social Justice was an epic event that saw so many foundation altering happenings! Hood mentioned the eMpire…for those of you unaware, that’s referencing a rumored group formed by Mario Maurako, Max Kael, and Mike Best…Best and Kael are best known for their legendary careers over at High Octane Wrestling.

Hood: Nice pun, douche

Smith: They eviscerated Silver Cyanide, en route to a Mario victory AND laid waste to Paul Paras after an epic match that resulted in The Perfect One retaining his OCW Championship against a very game, a very strong Vincent Langston.

Hood: Some are calling it the greatest chain match in wrestling history…not the highest bar, but, hey, we’ll take it!

Smith: We also witnessed Matt Meyhu retain his vice grip on the OCW main event scene by outlasting six other competitors and walking out of the Elimination Chamber the #1 Contender. This, one would think, sets up a rematch between Meyhu and Paras.

Hood: One would think…but the Block Party lineup has ‘TBA’ against Paras. I don’t think Meyhu changed his name, did he?

Smith: As far as I know there are only two people in OCW going through ‘the change’…you, to pander to the eMpire and, The Lost Soul.

Hood: Strange things are afoot, Smith

Smith: Right…Kitty Petrova claimed her first belt here in OCW by dethroning Ed Houston. Andrea Hernandez retained her Craze Championship by shutting Bob Grenier up. Grenier and Vargas staved off LurrrZag, to retain their tag team titles. Team ATARI opened the show with a hot win against Jackson Black and Jason Kortare, securing an OCW Tag Team Title shot. And, finally, Ariel Shadows and Hayley Robinson waged war while dealing with a sexist referee en route to having, perhaps, the match of the night. All in all, Social Justice was LYT

Hood: Geezus

~The slow bass drum rumble of “When the Levee Breaks” gets the action started, immediately getting a rise out of the live crowd in Key West. They’ve never heard this music over the sound system of the OCW Arena before, but the buzz of the fans quickly turns to a showering of nearly deafening boos as they realize who this Led Zeppelin song heralds the arrival of~

Smith: Oh come on, these guys again? Didn’t they do enough damage at Social Justice?

~From behind the curtain, HOW Hall of Famers Michael Best and Maximillian Kael step out onto the stage, each wearing a t-shirt emblazoned with the logo of OCW’s newest scourge, the eMpire. The two half brothers don’t seem to be in a hurry, as they saunter toward the ramp, looking out into the crowd and seeming pretty pleased with themselves. Max carries what looks to be a small leather bag with a large #970000 red MK emblazoned upon it. ~

Hood: I don’t know about these HOW guys, Smith. Look what they did to Paul Paras and Vincent Langston in the main event! As great as it was to see Mario Maurako finally step up and become a fucking man at Social Justice, it’s hard to trust anything that comes from High Octane Wrestling or Lee Best. Especially his children.

~Mike Best is first down the ramp, calling the cameraman closer as he reaches out his arm, flipping the bird and showing off the HOW Hall of Fame ring adorned upon his middle finger. Max saunters closely behind him, a small but evil grin plastered over his eerie, distorted face, lifting his leather bag up to display it toward the camera before he follows Mike to the ring. ~

Smith: It’s hard to disagree, Hood. Last week, Max Kael viciously assaulted Silver Cyanide, who is not here tonight due to injuries sustained at Social Justice. In fact, it’s hard to say when… if ever… Silver Cyanide will appear in an OCW ring again. And instead of pressing charges, Marcus Welsh SIGNS THEM TO CONTRACTS?

Hood: And don’t forget I’m going to choose my words carefully, since tonight’s show is now live on HOTv, but let’s just say… I have a bad feeling about this. And when even *I* have a bad feeling about this, it’s probably REALLY bad.

~Rolling under the ropes, Michael Best is the first in the ring– he holds open the ropes, gesturing a small bow as he makes way for his brother. Max steps between the open ropes, as now both men descend on Belvedere, backing him down toward the turnbuckle with bad intentions in their eyes. ~

Smith: Oh come on! Leave him alone!

Hood: Don’t hurt that glorious moustache, you monsters, or I’ll… I’ll…

Smith: You’ll what, Hood?

Hood: …well, I won’t be happy, that’s for sure.

~Max steps closer to the ring announcer, the full weight of his intimidation upon poor Belvedere as he stares down at him with his one good eye. The soldered, corroded metal eyepatch on his other reflects in the stage lights. Mike Best reaches out suddenly, snatching the microphone from Belvedere’s hand. The OCW ring announcer lets it go without a fight, quickly ducking through the ropes and bailing out of the ring. Max steps to the center of the ring reaching into his leather bag to reveal a golden custom Maxopotamian Microphone which crackles to life as he lifts it to his lips, the fans continue to boo the two brothers.~

Max Kael: My name is Maximillian Kael, the Prime Minister of Maxopotamia, the Lord of Kaelsalvania, and a proud member of THE EMPIRE!

~Max’s voice cuts through the booing, his voice warbling between a shrill cry and a wet growl. Though the audience continues to react negatively to him Max appears jovial and undisturbed as he lifts his hand offering a cordial royal wave to everyone. ~

Max Kael: Oh I know the people here love to boo change but it’s not entirely your fault., you boo because your servile minds are programed to hate outsiders. You boo because people like us challenge everything you’ve ever known. You’re 4CW fans after all, you don’t kn-

~Mike quickly steps forward and whispers something into Max’s ear, his smiling vanishing for a moment before laughing nervously into his mic. The fans boo louder before an OCW chant brakes out~

Max Kael: My brother has informed me that this is ZeroCW, I get the numbers mixed up. Yes, you quote unquote people here at Zero Chance of Winning are a very unwelcoming, uncharming bunch but again, that’s not your fault, you weren’t raised to be good, supportive, smart fans.

~The Prime Minister points at his one eye and shrugs his shoulders looking dubiously apologetic through the growing chorus of OCW chants. Max attempts to speak again however the chants grow more deafening as his expression darkens with annoyance. Finally Max lifts the mic back to his mouth, his lips pulled back into a toothy sneer.~

Max Kael: Also can I take a moment to point out that only lazy idiots say “Oh” instead of “Zero”, figure it out already.

Fans: FUCK YOU, GO HOME *CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP*

Max Kael: Thank you, you’ve been a so-so crowd!

~The Lord of Kaelsalvania offers himself a golf clap and actually pats himself on the back before opening the floor to the Tsar of Insult, Mike Best. He raises the microphone to his lips to speak for the first time in Online Championship Wrestling. ~

Fans: FUCK YOU, GO HOME *CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP*

~Mike lets out a short, exasperated snippet of a laugh, trying to hide his frustration. He raises the microphone again, waiting for a moment of opportunity, and finally begins to talk. This time he speaks softly, forcing the crowd to close their mouths and listen.~

Mike Best: You know, I spent all week trying to find the perfect words for this moment.

~He steps toward the center of the ring, taking a moment of pause to ensure that he won’t again be interrupted. The fans seem interested, even if it is an interest born from spite~

Mike Best: I had a lot of purple prose and bullshit rhetoric to come out here and spew about the birth of the eMpire. About a new dawn, a new beginning, blah blah blah. But as I walked down the ramp just now, and I looked out into this sea of… apathy… I realized that it didn’t matter. Not one bit. Because while I may have come to this company for the betterment of Mario Maurako… the betterment of HOW… the betterment of HOTv– you’re welcome, by the way– that’s not what made me sign on the dotted line and become a permanent fixture in Online Championship Wrestling.

~He begins a soft pace around the ring, looking down toward the mat and taking his eyes off the crowd. He is not speaking to them– he’s speaking at them. Max looks confused as he hears Mike say Online Championship Wrestling though he refrains from speaking.~

Mike Best: I didn’t sign because of the *very* generous contract that was offered to me by Marcus Welsh. I didn’t sign because I thought it would be an easy ride, either– having personally taken the HOW World Championship from Paul Paras once with my own two hands, I know that OCW is no small mountain to climb. No, the reason I decided to sign a contract with OCW was because Marcus Welsh… deserves… better.

~The crowd begins to boo, even more loudly now. It’s bad enough that this HOW Twitter Warrior (@hofmikebest, follow him!) is standing in the ring, glorifying Mario’s betrayal of OCW, but now he’s glorifying Marcus Welsh. The hate is fucking real. (@paragonkael, follow him too.)~

Mike Best: When we began talks to make OCW part of HOTv, it meant a lot of research. It meant a lot of long talks with my old friend Mario Maurako. It meant scouting. I know most of you never went to college, so I don’t expect you to understand business, but there is a lot more work in this business of show than just putting on tights and yelling “WHO BETTER THAN BIFFORD” at a brick wall every day.

~There is a roar from the crowd for OCW Hall of Famer Big Bifford, who is certainly beloved when compared to the piece of shit standing in the ring with a microphone. Both Mike and Max look disgusted at their roar of approval, shaking their heads in disgust. ~

Mike Best: Yeah, go ahead and keep idolizing that fat fucking bully …this is exactly what I’m talking about. A complete lack of respect. A complete failure to recognize the real talent in the industry. Men like myself and my brother, Max. Men like Mario Maurako. Men like Marcus. Fucking Welsh. The man breaks his back, week in and week out, and for who? It’s not for *him*. It’s not for *me*, or for *Paul Paras*. It’s for you. The little people. The snowflake Florida trash. The Generation Z whiners and complainers who huff and puff and blow their hot air whenever someone doesn’t pat their head for going potty all by themselves. Marcus Welsh busts his ass for you every. Single. Day. And what does he get in return?

~Michael shakes his head, looking as contemptful of the crowd as they do of him. ~

Mike Best: He gets a crowd full of people who don’t appreciate a second of that hard work. He gets a locker room full of guys in the back who don’t give a shit about anything but their own place on the card. Half of them have no feedback, no ideas. They’re just waiting for the next number one contender, so they can complain that it isn’t them. They’re living on Twitter, posting half naked selfies and treating ReTweets like participation trophies. They’re barging into his office, complaining that other people aren’t respecting their creative safe spaces. This industry has changed, and it’s not for the better. No one gives a SHIT about telling good stories and selling tickets. It’s the ME Generation. ME ME ME, fuck you, what about ME.

~His volume is at a peak now, but it’s as if he realizes he’s getting emotional and suddenly calms it back down to a dull roar. An angry whisper, if you will. ~

Mike Best: I am here to save this company from itself. To save OCW. To save Marcus Welsh. But most of all, I am here for one man– for a man who has been a friend for a long time. For a man who like Marcus Welsh, realizes that he deserves *better*. And you might notice that I haven’t spent any time talking about what happened last week at Social Justice. And hey, with as “in business for themselves” as a lot of the boys and girls in the back are, maybe they don’t even realized it happened. But it’s not my place to discuss why Mario Maurako did what he did last week– it’s his. And without any further ado, I would like to bring that man out… right… NOW.

~He lower the microphone, the crowd erupting into boos for Mario as “Ego” by Element Eighty hits and Mario steps out onto the stage with a smirk on his face and new tights on his waist.~

Smith: Here comes the turncoat from Social Justice; the despicable Mario Maurako.

Hood: And it looks like he upgraded his tights. As much as I want to, I will refrain from saying that he upgraded his friends.

Smith: New music, too. I don’t like any of it. Mario Maurako is an asshole. There I said it!

Hood: You animal you.

~Mario enters the ring and gives a nice firm handshake to Max Kael, before turning to Mike Best and greeting him with a nice firm handshake as well. Mike then passes off the microphone as Mario takes a moment to look out at the OCW faithful, as they rain down boos upon him and his friends in the eMpire, he raises the microphone and begins to speak.~

Mario Maurako: What?

~The fans continue their unmerciful boos.~

Mario Maurako: I don’t know what you people want from me. When I returned to OCW, I revealed that I was in poor health and that I had the mission of fulfilling my bucket list. Enter Death March. It was on my bucket list to once again work with Silver Cyanide and Paul Paras.

~The fans cheer the mention of their fallen heroes.~

Mario Maurako: But then Paras went on to claim what was rightfully mine, the OCW Championship. Even still, I took a deep breath and I decided that maybe Cyanide and I could have one last run for the Tag Team Titles. Instead he decided to super kick me in the back of the head and then in the face and let Bifford pin me. So, I immediately challenged Bifford to a one on one match, only to have Cyanide super kick me again.

~The fans now cheer the event that they previously booed.~

Mario Maurako: So I went home for a few weeks of reflection. During that reflection, I realized that Paul Paras and Silver Cyanide were holding me back, and had been holding me back FOR YEARS!

~The fans start the oh so predictable “You Sold Out” chant.~

Mario Maurako: Cyanide and Paras are two time OCW Champions. Does anyone know how many one on one opportunities I’ve had at claiming the prize? ONE! In 2001 against TGO. I know it has been 18 years, but can anyone remember how that match ended? Don’t worry, I’ll fill you in. It ended when Paul Paras hit me with his kendo stick and cost me my shot at the OCW Championship.

~Mario looks hurt, as though he can feel the blow all over again after all these years. There is real emotion in his voice– he’s not just cutting a “bad guy promo”, these words are from his heart.~

Mario Maurako: I’m tired of playing by the rules and waiting to be rewarded. Look at Zybala! He was in charge because I put together the team that won Death March. Zybala didn’t do that; I did that! What did I get for my efforts? Not a damn thing. I got a match from hell with Silver Cyanide, and Paul Paras got the main event.

~He shakes his head in disgust, looking to his compatriots for support. Max puts a thoughtful hand on his shoulder, though he recoils it immediately. Mike mouths that he’s “got this”. ~

Mario Maurako: So I guess you could say that I looked to… God… for answers. I looked to GOD, and he sent me his Sons. Now together… we are going to ring in a NEW ERA of OCW. A NEW ERA for Mario Maurako. Welcome to the new era… and the rise… of The eMpire!

~Mario flips the microphone out of his hand, callously, letting it feedback as it hits the mat with a dull thud. He grabs the arms of each of his new teammates and raising them into the air, a sign of unity between the three old friends and new allies. ~

The eMpire has arrived.

~We cut back to the live broadcast~

Smith: HOTv…a network where you can view all the archived broadcasts of OCW and HOW. I’m told more promotions will add their shows to the network in the future.

Hood: Yea man I was looking around that network earlier today…some seriously cool shit. And by cool shit, I mean shit that is cool.

Smith: Thank you for that unnecessary explanation. Marcus Welsh is certainly making the most of this status as ‘temporary’ GM while Zybala prepares to compete in the 32 person, Block Party tournament

Hood: Yep, Mike Best…Max Kael…the eMpire…HOTv…Welsh doing Welsh things…making OCW great again!

Smith: MOGA. Anyway, it’s time to get to the in ring action this evening…so, let’s do just that!

Singles Match
Osidius Rex (0-0) vs. Jack Puffer (0-2)

~The opening match is upon us. These Key West fans are READY. Their bodies are READY. Their souls are READY. They are prepared to give themselves to the OCW in-ring product tonight. We thank them for their promiscuous ways. Belvedere clears his throat to a huge ovation~

Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen…tonight’s opening match is scheduled for one fall! Currently in the ring, from Aurora, Illinois…Jack Puffer!

~Puffer throws his arm in the air and shadow boxes. He grabs his shoulder, wincing~

Smith: Careful, Puffer

Hood: I heard Puffer was recently recruited by the owner of some rival promotion

Smith: Yea, right. Like someone would be dumb enough to recruit Jack Puffer.

Hood: There are some massive idiots out there, Smith.

Belvedere: And, his opponent…

~Osidius Rex and his wife Ursula come to the ring slowly as the beginning of Sanctioned Annihilation plays and the fans are silent as they make their way down the aisle. Osidius lowers the ropes for Ursula and they come to the middle of the ring~

Belvedere: From Sparta! Standing 6’8 and weighing in at 320lbs…Osidius Rex!

Smith: We saw Osidius Rex make something of an impact last Monday by depositing Petia Horamos over the roof of Twitter HQ.

Hood: This man may never do a damn thing moving forward…but I’ll always remember him for that act. Thank you, Osidius.

Smith: He’s out here tonight looking to impress…alongside, is his wife, Ursula.

Hood: Hell yea

~Belvedere holds the ropes open for Ursula. She makes her exit. He does the same. The bell rings~

Smith: We’re about to find out if Osidius Rex will be a player in OCW.

Hood: Yea man, if he beats Jack Puffer just imagine the offers he’ll receive!

~Puffer approaches Rex, looking to begin things with a friendly handshake. Rex slaps Puffer’s hand away and begins to beat him down with right hands!! He clobbers Puffer, beating him relentlessly. Puffer stumbles down…he falls onto the mat, he’s unable to protect himself~

Smith: Oh man! Rex is demolishing Jack Puffer!

Hood: Holy shit, Scruff may want to stop this match

Smith: So much for sportsmanship

Hood: Pussies are the ones who complain about sportsmanship. You think Jordan gave a fuck about shaking some dude’s hand before a game?

Smith: I don’t know…maybe in baseball.

Hood: Well, that would explain a lot.

~Rex hoists Puffer up, onto his shoulder and drills him into the mat with a powerslam!! Ursula nods with approval on the outside. Rex rises to one knee, looking down at Jack. He could pin the good detective right now, if he wanted to. It becomes clear he does not want to~

Smith: Two weeks and two eviscerations thrown down by Osidius Rex

Hood: Did Petia survive? Not that I care…just curious.

Smith: I’m told Petia did, indeed, survive. He’s still hoping to run for Senate in 2020.

Hood: Well that sucks

~Rex returns to his feet. He pulls Puffer up and hoists Jack into the air. He’s got Jack’s arms stretched out…he begins to bend them in a very unnatural way. Jack yells out, screaming in pain. Scruff looks up like “Oh shit”~

Smith: Rex calls this the Spartan Blood Eagle! He’s going to break Jack’s arms!

Hood: I would say this might derail Jack’s career as a detective but we all know he never solves anything.

Smith: I’m sure he’s solved something.

Hood: Nope, I’m told he’s still missing his left sock.

~Jack yells out…he screams “I QUIT! I QUIT!” Scruff calls for the bell, mercilessly ending the match. Rex holds onto the move a little longer than anybody watching would like…before dropping Jack to the mat. Puffer brings his arms in, curling into a fetal position, looking injured~

Belvedere: Here is your winner…OSIDIUS REX!!!!!

Smith: Brutal

Hood: Remind me to never piss Osidius Rex off.

Smith: Only if you agree to eat some of Alice’s mustard

Hood: Fuck that shit, I’d rather have Rex break my arms.

—–

~Scene Opens, Jason Kortare was spotted backstage walking through the hallways. He was on the search for a certain somebody. To his surprise he spots Marcus Welsh over by the table where they serve coffee. Jason smiles with delight as he walks over to him.~

[Jason]: “Hey Mr. Welsh.”

~Placing his hand on Marcus’s shoulder, Jason showed some level of comfort.~

[Jason]: “Listen Mr. Welsh, I just want you to know that I sympathize a lot with everything that you’ve been through as of late. I can almost relate to you in a sense. I actually wanted to share with you some great ideas I had in mind.”

~Smiling, Jason walks over and stands next to Marcus on the other side of him in the hallway.~

[Jason]: “What do you think about OCW taking Hollywood by storm? Monday Night Massacre does pretty well on the STARZ network, I was thinking that perhaps you and I can go on a business trip in Los Angeles. I can set up a few meetings for us with some businessmen involved in marketing and investing in good promotions. I think OCW should have more merchandise on a few streets in Los Angeles. What OCW needs right now is more of the talent being exposed to the media out there in Hollywood. If OCW headquarters gets ahold of you being responsible for all these great deals? Imagine what the outcome could be?”

~Welsh turns around, holding an organic can of coconut water. He takes a sip~

Welsh: Ah, good stuff. I like to hang around the coffee area. This is where all the action takes place, ya know? People talk shop, they vent their frustrations…you get a real sense for what’s going on backstage. It’s nice.

~Welsh takes another sip and looks at Jason~

Welsh: Jason, my man. Hell of an effort last week at Social Justice. I was really pulling for ya. You’ve got a big match tonight against another dinosaur walking the OCW Earth. You’d think we were Jurassic Park with all these should-be extinct animals roaming the OCW landscape. But, that’s what you get when you put Zybala in charge. Push the old guard while ignoring the new, young talent – like yourself.

~Welsh takes another sip. He’s still sporting a clean face and shaved head~

Welsh: I’ve told you before that I’m all about star power. Hollywood, NFL, NBA, you name it…we get some serious star power involved and I’m there. I’m only in charge for a limited time and, given the accelerated erosion of MY OCW under Zybala’s reign, I can already tell this time is going to be mired with frustration. So, yea…I think a trip out to the coast would do wonders for my disposition.

~With a smiley grin, he places his hand on Welsh’s shoulder.~

[Jason]: “I am going to blow you away.”

~We cut back to the announce team~

Smith: Interesting choice of words

Hood: Jason Kortare is one unique dude.

Smith: He has his own style, that’s for sure. He’s got a huge match later tonight against Lurrr!

~We cut backstage, seeing the man known as PerZag sitting alone in his locker room. He stares at the wall in front of him, not moving an inch, his eyes staring at the same spot on the wall. He finally moves, reaching his right hand up, and feeling at his nose, which is still recovering from the belt shot back at Social Justice. He stands up, spotting a mirror to his left, and walks over to it. He stares at himself in the mirror, specifically at his busted nose, before snapping~

~He throws a right handed punch into the mirror, cracking it. PerZag steps back from the mirror, and looks down at his knuckles, which is now covered with cuts, and more specifically, blood. He stares back at the cracked mirror, at his damaged nose, at his damaged hand, at his damaged………~

~PerZag turns around, grabbing the chair, and throws it straight into the mirror, shattering it everywhere. He looks down at the mess, and turns around, walking towards the exit of his locker room, muttering to himself.~

PerZag: Fuck this shithole.

~PerZag opens up the door of his locker room, and exits it as the scene swaps back to Smith and Hood.~

Smith: PerZag seems to still be plagued by last week’s defeat

Hood: Nice to see he’s letting it out, rather than holding it in. Holding that anger in can really do damage to a person.

Smith: Word of advice to anyone roaming the OCW hallways…stay out of PerZag’s way

Hood: Yea, if he happens to see Alice he might literally murder her

Smith: DON’T YOU SAY THINGS LIKE THAT! Whew…anyway, it’s time for our next match this evening as we get our first look at…Myst!

Singles Match
Myst (0-0) vs. John E Depth (1-3)

~The crowd is buzzing. They feel good. St Patrick’s Day rages on within the OCW Arena. Who cares if it was yesterday? Why should we feel obligated to confine our days into 24 hour cycles? Why can’t St Patrick’s Day last as long as we like? That’s the spirit! The fans are downing GREEN beer (leftover from some local establishment) and are enjoying what’s taking place in front of them. Belvedere clears his throat~

Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen the following contest is scheduled for one fall! Currently in the ring, from Hollywood, California…John E Depth!

~Depth gyrates to the delight of no one~

Smith: A filthy man

Hood: Winner of one match! Remember?

Smith: How could I forget…The Ghost Man

Belvedere: And, his opponent…

~The sound of hissing steam pipes through the speakers as a slow rolling wave of smoke begins to creep out from the ramp like the tide rolling in from the ocean. The arena feigns darkness with a dim blue glow emitting from the lights. Out walks a small hunched over man in white robes carrying a small dirty silver lantern in which a similar blue light is shining. He paves a way through the thickening fog and stops atop the entrance ramp and turns back with the lantern ahead of him. Out to the ramp walks a giant 6’11” being with long silver hair flowing around a white mask lined with 3 diagonal black stripes that wraps around the contours of his face. His long white wrestling singlet has a single black strap that cuts across his bulking upper body. As soon as the monster appears, the small monk turns back towards the ring and slowly leads Myst towards the ring. As they get closer, smoke begins to pour out from under the ring and engulf the apron and stairs. The monk stops ringside and sweeps the lantern in a motion across his body from Myst towards the ring. Myst, who has stopped a few feet from ringside walks near and begins his slow ascent up the stairs towards the turnbuckle. He easily steps over the top rope and enters the ring that is slowly attracting a shallow covering of smoke. He looks over to the monk who extinguishes the dim blue light from the lantern as the lights raise back to normal~

Belvedere: From The Congo, standing 6’11 and weighing in at 345lbs…Myst!

Smith: Myst, like Osidius Rex, is a mountain of a man.

Hood: I wonder if it’s cold on top of his head.

Smith: Why?

Hood: Well you said he was a mountain. Aren’t mountaintops cold?

Smith: Please

~Belvedere exits and the bell sounds~

Smith: Depth is in over his head.

Hood: Maybe he should be John E Shallow

Smith: Doesn’t have the same ring to it.

Hood: Yea, you’re right

~Depth, with a lollipop in his mouth (appears to be cherry) looks at Myst and mocks him. He says a few derogatory things about the movie “Congo”. Some guy in the front row is offended, saying “Hey, I loved that movie! The scene where the gorilla is drinking a martini is fucking classic!” Depth pays him no mind. He removes the lollipop from his mouth and flicks it at Myst, who has yet to move. It hits Myst in the chest, bounces off, and makes a sloppy landing on the mat. The crowd is like, “Oh shit, Depth fucked up.” Depth doesn’t care…he continues to make fun of the leviathan in front of him~

Smith: Not the smartest approach

Hood: Or, is it?

~Myst charges forward, crushing the lollipop under his boot and then using that same boot to DRILL Depth in the face!!! Depth spins around and falls forward, into a corner. We see lollipop crumbs stuck in his beat. Myst grabs Depth by the hair, turns him around, clutches his throat, lifts him up and plants him into the mat with a chokeslam. The fans are like “Damn.” But, they are also like, “Guy had it coming.”~

Hood: It isn’t…or wasn’t…past or present tense?

Smith: I think either/or

Hood: But not neither/nor

Smith: FOCUS

~Myst rips Depth from the canvas with freakish ease. He puts Depth into position…deadlifts him into the air and slams him as hard as he can into the mat with a Jacknife Powerbomb (The Cleanse). Depth’s back is fucked. He’s unconscious. Myst makes the cover~

1!

2!

3!!!

~The bell rings~

Belvedere: Here is your winner…MYST!!!!!

Smith: Well, that was brutal.

Hood: Myst is a freak, man. And, note to future opponents…he does not like cherry flavored candy.

Smith: I think the jury is still out on that one, Hood. However, what we do know is that Myst is big, he’s strong, and he’s going to be a force here in OCW.

Hood: No doubt.

~The fans react as SHOOTAH is hustling down to the ring, wearing head gear and a bullet proof vest (for some reason). He slides into the ring, checking on Depth~

Smith: Shootah doesn’t have much…but, most of what he has is in that ring, staring up at the lights

Hood: Yes, D-Level Porn Director John E Depth is Shootah’s bread and butter

~Myst, about to exit, pauses. He turns and looks down at Shootah, who is tending to Depth. Myst heads Shootah’s way. The fans are like ‘OH FUCK’. Myst grabs Shootah by the neck, pulling him up~

Smith: Bad move coming out here, Shootah

Hood: Life decisions, people. Make good ones!

~Myst kicks Shootah in the gut. He lifts him up and SLAMS him on top of Depth with another Jacknife Powerbomb (The Cleanse)!!! Both Depth and Shootah are down, out. Myst steps over the top rope and makes his exit~

Smith: Big statement here tonight by Myst. He’s strong, intimidating, and wastes no movement in executing his offense.

Hood: Kind of a throwback to roster members from the early 2000s, Smith. Hey, remember Supreme Machine?

Smith: How could I forget…a former Savage Champion. A great wrestler.

Hood: Myst could be our new Supreme Machine!

Smith: I like to think newcomers such as Myst will carve out their own, individual legacies. But, I get what you’re saying.

~We go to a pre-taped segment. Who’Re is sitting in the interview studio, looking towards the camera.~

Who’Re: Hello everyone, Who’Re here, sitting with the current OCW Savage Champion, Vincent “The Legend” Langston.

~The camera pans out to reveal Langston sitting in the second chair. He looks like he’s still working on healing up from his epic war this weekend. He also doesn’t look that pleased to be doing an interview.~

Who’Re: Vincent, thank you for agreeing to meet with me.

Vincent Langston: I was told it was mandatory.

Who’Re: Oh. That might have been a little white lie.

~Langston moves to stand up, but Who’Re quickly continues on.~

Who’Re: But as long as you’re here, could you please answer a few questions?

~After a second, Langston sits back down.~

Who’Re: So you had what many are describing as the greatest Chain match ever against the OCW World Champion, Paul Paras. You came oh so close to finally giving Paras his first loss. How are you feeling after that night?

Vincent Langston: Sore. But also.. pleased.

Who’Re: Pleased?

Vincent Langston: Since I came to OCW, all I’ve asked for is to face the best and feel the glory of battle. Paras gave me all I’ve been seeking and more. Sure, I came up a little short, but Paras is going to remember me for some time, and I learned a lot from the battle. I would love to fight Paras again, even non-title, to continue to challenge myself.

Who’Re: It’s good to know you’re not depressed about your first singles loss in OCW.

~Langston doesn’t say anything, since this wasn’t a question, and he doesn’t feel like being baited.~

Who’Re: So after the match, Paul Paras was betrayed by his former partner, Mario Maurako, and attacked by wrestlers from HOW. You surprisingly tried to intervene, but ended up on the outside. Why did you try to help the champion?

Vincent Langston: Paras earned my respect, and didn’t deserve to be attacked by three men after such a brutal contest. I know, that comes off as hypocritical from me, but it is what it is. Maurako proved himself to be a coward, teaming with outsiders because he’s not worthy of being a champion. So I’ll put this out here right now: if Paul Paras needs a partner in the next few weeks, he knows where to find me.

Who’Re: Bold words. Finally, I wanted to ask you about the return of Melinda Rhodes, your former tag-team partner. She had some strong statements about you at Social Justice, along with several others here at OCW. Do you have a response?

~Langston takes a moment to think things through before responding.~

Vincent Langston: Rhodes still feels strongly about what went down between us, and I fully understand it. I was in a different frame of mind at the time, which only got worse the last few months. But I feel more mentally sound than I have in some time. I wish Rhodes the best of luck in her match against The Lost Soul tonight.

Who’Re: That’s a surprising response.. Vincent?

~Langston is already on his feet and pulling off his mic. Who’Re watches him go, and then turns back to the camera.~

Who’re: I guess the interview’s over. Glad I got as much as I did. Let’s send it back to the arena.

~Who’Re smiles at the camera as we cut away.~

Smith: A calmer Savage Champion

Hood: Calm before the storm?

Smith: I don’t know, Hood. Sometimes when you push yourself to the absolute limit…testing every fiber of your being…sometimes it manifests into a more peaceful demeanor full of perspective

Hood: Nah, he’s just trolling us. That’s what I think!

~The Dravers Boys are backstage at the OCW arena and they are getting ready for their match. Nathan is on the floor doing sit ups and other last minute exercises.~

Jonathan: So, you ready for this bro?

Nathan: Of course. We’re gonna go out there tonight and start on the road to what is rightfully *pant* ours! Hey though, I wonder how Alice is doing?

Jonathan: Yeah, I haven’t heard from her in ages come to think of it.

~The twins then hear a knock at their locker room door.~

Jonathan: Yeah?

~The door opens to reveal Barry, the backstage crew who the twins befriended a while back. ~

Nathan: Bazza!

Jonathan: How are you doing bud?

Barry: Hey guys! Thought I would be the first to officially welcome you guys back to OCW. Nath, are you…. I mean are you…

Nathan: Haha… I’m feeling better man. Thank-you.

~Barry looks relieved.~

Barry: Well good. Uh… *he pauses* well, just to let you guys know, your new music is all ready to go, so um… yeah. Good luck.

Jonathan: Thanks man.

~The twins both fist bump Barry who then leaves.~

Nathan: Nice guy.

Jonathan: Yeah.

~We leave the twins to do a final stretch out before their match and we cut back to ringside.~

Smith: So glad to see the Dravers back in OCW! They will have their official return match later this evening

Hood: Orange Cat Head

Smith: What?

Hood: Just a shout out to the Dravers and the nickname they gave Dr. Orange a few years back

Smith: Yea, that was something, alright. Well, next up is Aubrey Baxter-Kalei looking to get back on the winning track. Let’s head down to ringside!

Singles Match
Aubrey Baxter-Kalei (3-1) vs. Tom Ambrose (3-1)

~The night rages on. More in ring action is set to fill in the gaps created by a lackluster imagination. Tom Ambrose is in the ring, hopping around, looking ready. This guy needs a bounce back win. Belvedere clears his throat~

Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen…the following contest is scheduled for one fall! Currently in the ring – Tom Ambrose!

Smith: No entrance for Tom Ambrose

Hood: You know what that means

Smith: If I were a betting man, I might throw some money down on Aubrey

Hood: Yea, I’m trying right now but this fucking sports betting app never fucking works. WEAK ASS APP

Belvedere: And, his opponent…

~Shades of pink lights begin to flicker around the stage area. “Whatever U Like” By Nicole Scherzinger (Feat. T.I.) blasts over the P.A. system! Aubrey Baxter comes from behind the curtain as she appears on the stage. She seductively takes a bow on the stage as she let’s her hair fall, she comes back up and strokes her hair back as she makes her way down the entrance ramp way. Making her way over to the ring post, she sits up on the ring post and crosses her legs and poses while leaning over to her right side. She crawls under the ring and makes her way over to the center. She takes another bow and then poses once more~

Belvedere: From Toronto, Canada…standing 5’6 and weighing in at 132lbs…Aubrey Baxter-Kalei!!!

~Belvedere exits and the bell rings~

Smith: The last time we saw Aubrey she came up just shy in her attempt to qualify for Social Justice’s elimination chamber

Hood: She’s so hot

Smith: Calm down, Hood. She’s a competitor…an artist…she’s not merely an object.

Hood: Sure she is…an object that I will mentally catalog for later

Smith: Creepy

~Ambrose takes off, sprinting toward Aubrey. He’s looking for an early advantage…a quick start! Aubrey CUTS RIGHT THROUGH HIM WITH A SPEAR!! The fans go wild!! She pops to her feet! Ambrose is down, holding his guts (NOT LITERALLY). Aubrey lifts her leg up and jumps into the air, bringing it down onto Ambrose with a very effective leg drop. Ambrose remains down as Aubrey returns to her feet, looking tremendous~

Smith: Aubrey looks great!

Hood: Oh, so it isn’t creepy when you lust over her looks, right?

Smith: I’m talking about her in ring performance

Hood: So was I!

~Ambrose fights to his feet. Aubrey isn’t scared. She doesn’t flinch. Instead, she flies forward with a Scissors Kick, smacking Ambrose right into the face!!! Ambrose stumbles backward, spinning around…he hits the ropes, ricochets off and right into Aubrey’s knees! She jumps up, places her knees into his back and takes him down with Break-A-B*tch!!!! Tom is on dream street. Aubrey makes the cover…Scruff slides in with the count~

1!

2!

3!!!!

~The bell rings~

Belvedere: Here is your winner…AUBREY BAXTER-KALEI!!!!!

Smith: What a performance!

Hood: Hey! Stop being creepy!

Smith: Oh relax…unfurl your feelings.

Hood: You trying to say my feelings are ruffled?

Smith: Maybe

Hood: Speaking of Ruffles…great tasting chips! Go out and buy some today!

Smith: And, speaking of more relevant topics…Aubrey Baxter-Kalei with a dominating performance tonight as she looks eager to ascend the OCW rankings

~The camera cuts backstage to the familiar cocky swagger of the former OCW Tag Team Champion, Jacob Hotstuff, walking down the halls with a megawatt smile, expensive shades, his favorite fur coat, and even hair back on his head, much to the surprise of people he saw. Of course workers in the hall stopped the gawk at the man as he hadn’t been seen on OCW Television in some time.~

Hood: MY BOY!

Smith: What in the hell is Jacob Hotstuff doing back here? I thought we were done with that clown!

Hood: You can’t stop Hollywood!

~Wrong. Suddenly he stops and slips his shades up on his face, purely in shock.~

Hotstuff: You?! What the fuck do you want? Marcus Welsh texted ME here for a contract renewal! You’re old news and wait, weren’t you fired?!!!

Familiar female voice: Not anymore, sunshine…..

~The camera turns to reveal the face of a very angry….~

MELINDA RHODES!

Hood: Oh fuck…..

~She’s attired in her ring gear, cracking her knuckles and looking ready to rip someone’s throat out, namely Jacob-Fucking-Hotstuff. Jacob bursts into a spring but the Rebel catches up to him quick, gathering him from behind and slamming his head into a crate. Workers in the hallway don’t scatter but instead gather around, passing money among each other as they placed bets!~

Rebel: That text you got wasn’t from Markie Marc Welsh…. it was from ME!

~Melinda doubles him over starts savagely kneeing the stunned Hotstuff in the ribs, sternum and chest over and over before turning and HURLING him across the hallway into the sheet rock wall with enough force to put his head completely through it! Pulling him out she hits him with the hardest right hand to the left cheek, shattering the orbital bone and immediately swelling his right eye shut!~

Smith: The Rebel is beating the holy hell out of Jacob Hotstuff and nobody’s stopping her!

~She then drags him down the hall a bit only to heft him up and LAUNCH him through a plate glass window face first into one of the empty back offices! Melinda climbs in right after him, kicking bits of glass as the camera follows her every move.~

Rebel: Motherfucker, you humiliated me, drove a wedge between a friend and tag partner of mine, and then thought you could just walk away, Scott-fucking-free? HELL TO THE FUCK TO THE NO!

~She promptly kicked him square in the nose with enough force to break bone, sending a spray of blood upon the floor. She then gathers him up, whimpering and half-conscious as she slams his head into a file cabinet with enough force to pop an empty locked drawer open as the entire aluminum side nearly caves in! He crumbles to the floor, begging and pleading with the Rebel.~

Hotstuff: Please….stop…no more…. please….

Rebel: FUCK WHAT YOU WANT, YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!

Hotstuff: …Babe…honey…It was an act…. stop hurting me…. It was all part of the SHOWHHHAAAACCCKKKKKEEEDD!!!

~She interrupts him by kicking him right in the nose again, practically flattening it to his face and now his cheek had begun to swell, blood coated his face and chest. Melinda then crouches down and grips him by the throat, slamming him against the wall. The Rebel then gets face to face, looking him directly in his terrified, unswollen eye.~ Rebel: You disgraced me, mocked me from afar from months, and then have the absolute fucking NERVE to not give me what you owe me you son of a bitch?

~Using her hand and the leverage of the wall, she lifts Jacob off the ground and to his feet by the throat, strangling him slowly in the process.~

Rebel: ….and now, I end you….

~Releasing him, Melinda spins, catches him in a 3 quarter necklock and drops with-~

Smith: SHOT IN THE DARK!!!! Jacob Hotstuff is out COLD!

~Melinda rises from his prone body, a satisfied smile on her face, standing over her conquered foe looking dominant as ever. Even her breathing is steady, even, and controlled, showcasing the minimal effort she actually needed to put down the piece of trash on the floor laid out before her. She chuckled softly, unable to help the giddy feeling of triumph washing over her.~

Rebel: Debt repaid. Don’t ever set foot in my locker room again, cocksucker.

~It’s on that note that Melinda climbs exits not through the broken window, but instead through the office door like a proper individual. The ring workers in the hall that had gathered around started to cheer and chant!~

Hallway Crowd: REBEL! REBEL! REBEL! REBEL! REBEL!

~Melinda smiles at them and shoots a little three finger salute before walking down the hallway, softly whistling her theme…~

~We cut back to ringside where Hood and Smith sit back equally shocked.~

Hood: I’m confused and slightly aroused at the same time….

Smith: Melinda Rhodes just utterly decimated Jacob Hotstuff backstage, laying waste to what is perhaps one of the most controversial talents (and I lose that word loosely) that OCW has ever had the displeasure of fielding in a wrestling ring. Goodbye and good riddance I say!

Hood: Yeah I’d say after being reduced to begging for his life and getting his face pretty much obliterated, his acting and wrestling careers are both over.

Smith: And I would be remiss if I didn’t say that anyone who enters the backstage area of OCW signs a waiver, especially non-contracted talent that states “Enter at your own Risk.” The only people protected backstage are the talent and workers backstage. So good luck with the impending lawsuit, Jacob Hotstuff, for to enter the hallowed halls of OCW, you have to sign your rights away or be a contracted talent, neither of which you are.

Hood: Rebs did trick him into coming here though.

Smith: Doesn’t matter. Most we’ll be liable for is a third of his medical bills, that’s it, and unless he’s going to Tijuana for the plastic surgery, there ain’t no way Jimmy Buffett is covering for someone that repugnant.

~We cut to a shot from earlier today. A very happy, confident looking Welsh is stepping out of an expensive car. We don’t notice the model because, well, we’ve got more important things to do than jack off over the model of vehicles. But, rest assured, it’s really fucking nice. Greg steps out from the passengers seat with a purple boa around his neck and some lavender shades. Marcus, as always, is dressed like a businessman on the cover of Forbes Magazine. He heads into the arena while Greg rummages through his phone. Welsh stops. He hears a smattering of inconsistent cheers. He turns and spots a small gathering of homeless people tailgating in the parking lot. They have several coat hangers places over the opening of a rusty barrel that seems to be filled with fire. Atop the coat hangers are several slices of cheap ass beef. They are drinking homemade liquor and singing random songs. Welsh walks over~

Marcus Welsh: Excuse me, but you cannot be here. We do not house the homeless. That’s what jobs are for.

Homeless Guy with 8 Teeth: We were invited!

Marcus Welsh: By who and if you say a higher power, I’m calling the police.

Homeless Girl with 12 Teeth: By the only person who understands us.

Homeless Person with 2 Teeth: We are here to support Mike Zybala in the OCW Tournament

Marcus Welsh: Okay, this is just ridiculous. Greg, call security.

~Greg does as he’s told. Welsh keeps his distance from the homeless people while eying the searing meat. It looks unlike any meat he’s ever grilled~

Marcus Welsh: What is that?

Homeless Guy with 3.5 Teeth: It’s fresh Nutria. Caught it just this mornin!

~Welsh is sure he knows what Nutria is but can’t quite place it. Greg gets off the phone~

Greg: Bad news. They have a permit to be here.

Marcus Welsh: ZYBALA!

~Welsh snaps his fingers~

Homeless Girl with 11 Teeth: LET’S GO ZYBALA LET’S GO!

~The rest of them join in chanting. Welsh’s fury is directed at Zybala until – until he spots something grossly familiar. He walks over and picks up a jar of HOMEMADE MUSTARD~

Marcus Welsh: Wait a minute…

~We cut back to the live feed~

Smith: MUSTARD! HOMEMADE MUSTARD!

Hood: SECURITY! Do not LET that mustard in here

Smith: This can only mean one thing, Hood…she’s back!

Hood: I thought you would have figured that out the minute you saw all those homeless fuckers hanging around. They follow Alice around like cats…and ants…and owls

Smith: It seems Alice is on Team Zybala, currently.

Hood: No surprise there…she’s the queen of terrible decisions.

Smith: So glad she’s back! She’s the best!

Tag Team Match
The Dravers Boys (0-0) vs. Tornado Alley (0-0)

~”Respect the Wind” from the movie TWISTER is playing throughout the arena. Vortex is spinning around, arms outstretched, while Debris follows, dropping trash behind him. An OCW official trudges a few feet behind, obviously annoyed, kicking the trash out of the ring. The fans chant “TORNADO! TORNADO!” Belvedere clears his throat, attempting to avoid the ongoing nonsense~

Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen the following match is a tag team contest and it is scheduled for one fall!! Introducing first…from the most dangerous storm cell currently residing in the Midwest…Vortex and Debris…Tornado Alley!!!

Smith: Tornado season is coming up…Vortex and Debris are excited, I’m sure

Hood: Extracting pleasure form other people’s misery…CLASSIC OCW, BABY

Belvedere: And, their opponents…

~The Boys are Back starts up and the twins emerge on stage with friendly smirks on faces. They then wander down the ramp, with Jonathan slightly ahead of Nathan. Nathan sings along to the theme. The boys also slap the hands of the closest fans. Upon reaching the ring apron the twins simultaneously leap over the top rope and climb the nearest turnbuckles and taunt the crowd in a friendly manner whilst the crowd cheers on~

Belvedere: And, their opponents…from Denver, Colorado…at a total combined weight of 400lbs…they are former OCW Tag Team Champions…please welcome back…THE DRAVERS BOYS!!!

~The fans continue going wild for the Dravers return!! Nathan and Jonathan look out into the fans, happy to be back. They turn, sharing an unspoken communication and hop off the corners in unison. They slap hands and head into their corner, ready for competition~

Smith: It’s been over a year since we last saw the Dravers!

Hood: I heard Who’Re dropped Nathan like a bad habit

Smith: There have been rumors

Hood: No doubt Sugar will be keeping a close watch on Nathan. He doesn’t want some goober from Denver cheesing on her merchandise

Smith: She’s nobody’s property!

Hood: Don’t let Sugar hear you say that

~The bell rings and Belvedere exits. Nathan is going to start the match for the Dravers and Vortex, as always, will begin for Tornado Alley~

Smith: Did you know that Tornado Alley were Fight One tag team champions?

Hood: The fuck?

Smith: It’s true

Hood: How did that happen? Were the previous champions blown away in a tornado or something?

Smith: I have no idea…I never watched Fight One

Hood: Damn straight you didn’t…OCW all the way, baby!

~Nathan and Vortex lock up! Vortex spins around, out of the lock up and continues spinning. Nathan stands back, hands on his hips. The crowd begins to emulate the spinning. Nathan turns toward Jonathan who mimics Vortex. The crowd gets a kick out of Jonathan’s mockery. Vortex steps, looks at Jonathan and yells “HEY!” He turns over and throws a dropkick at Jonathan, knocking him off the apron! The fans boooo~

Smith: I think Vortex felt infringed upon

Hood: Stealing his…can we say gimmick?

Smith: I don’t see why not

~Nathan looks out at Jonathan. Jonathan is okay, just surprised. Nathan runs forward and dropkicks Vortex in the back, sending the member of Tornado Alley crashing, front first into the corner. Nathan is back on his feet, greeting a staggering Vortex with a hip toss that sends him into the middle of the ring. Vortex arches his back, crawls over and tags in DEBRIS~

Smith: And here comes Debris!

Hood: Get the brooms ready!

~Debris rushes into the ring full of fire!! He charges at Nathan and spins around, throwing a discus lariat. Nathan ducks, jumps backward and smacks Debris in the head with a pele kick!!! Debris falls into the ropes. Nathan pops back up and tags a very eager Jonathan. Jonathan steps into the ring…the position themselves with Debris in between. Debris stands upright and stumbles toward the center of the ring~

Smith: Uh oh

Hood: Here it comes!

~Jonathan and Nathan lunge forward, simultaneously and drill Debris in the head with SEEING DOUBLE!! Debris goes stiff as a board, falling onto his back. The crowd leaps to their feet! Jonathan makes the cover, Scruff slides in with the count as the crowd counts along~

1!

2!

3!!!!

~The bell rings~

Belvedere: Here are your winners….THE DRAVERS BOYS!!!!!

Smith: The Dravers are back with an impressive victory!

Hood: Yea man…the last time they defeated Tornado Alley they won the OCW Tag Team Titles

Smith: Indeed they did…could this mean tag gold in their future?

Hood: It’s a tough division. You’ve got Vargas and Grenier with the straps. Team ATARI are the number one contenders…and then there’s this White Sky bullshit.

Smith: Tag division is red hot right now and looks to only improve with the exciting return of Nathan and Jonathan Dravers!

~The Dravers are in the ring celebrating win for their return match. As the OCW fans cheer them on loudly. However, the cheers and celebration were cut short as a very familiar tune hits over the public address system. As Baby I’m worth it by fifth harmony blares all over the arena. As out from the back steps OCW’s prettiest tag team Veronica Taylor, and Bianca Davis. The fans shower them with boos as the Dravers look at them with confusion. As they hold microphones they of course take the moment to pose arrogantly. Much like they did at Social Justice. After some posing they motion to cut the music as they look at the Dravers with a look of disdain.~

Veronica Taylor: Oh look OCW is at it again promoting old garbage instead of the hottest tag team in Wrestling Today. Like how typical is this B? We are once again overlooked because why?

Bianca Davis: Ugh its a travesty of justice but I am not surprised doll face. Because, they hate us.

Pretty Committee: Because they ain’t us.

~They share a bitchy giggle as the fans boo and the Dravers look on confused. At the two grow women acting like teenagers. As Veronica puts the microphone up to her lips she waits for the boos to die down before speaking.~

Veronica Taylor: And speaking of RUDE! These basics in this arena ugh don’t thy know we are like blessing them with our presence?

Bianca Davis: They don’t know what’s good for them quite frankly. But speaking of not knowing what’s good for them you two think you can waltz back into this tag team division and try and take our spot? Huh?! And you think because this trash supports you means anything?!

~Bianca points at the fans as this earns the Pretty Committee more boos.~

Veronica Taylor: Like they will ever amount to anything much like your comeback won’t amount to anything. Former champions cute! But honey this is 2019 and we are Wrestling’s hottest tag team. I mean I am sure you follow us on twitter just like all of these uggo basics. But don’t worry we are gonna make this simple for you.

Bianca Davis: either get out of our division or your gonna get a makeover!

Pretty Committee: Buh Bye BASICS!

~They blow arrogant kisses toward Dravers, and the OCW fans as they shower them with boos. The Dravers look upset at the words of the Pretty Committee but before they could rush the Mean Girls of OCW made their way to the back as the scene fades out.~

Smith: Ugh, those women are just the worst.

Hood: Did you see the arrogance in those kisses? I’ve never seen kisses so arrogant!

Smith: The Pretty Committee stumbled last week at Social Justice. It appears as though they are looking to rebound in a big way.

~Inside the OCW locker room…..~

~Nanook and all 400 plus pounds of him is sitting in front of his locker after taking part of a 6 man tag match as the opening match before the camera started rolling. Nanook smells of back rub as he sits and tries to recuperate from this match. At 52 years old and in no ways in in-ring shape, these matches are starting to take their toll on him physically. His back hurts, his hip hurts, his knees hurt, his neck hurts, everything hurts and he just wants to go lay down but can’t move.~

~The peace and quiet of the locker room ends when the second group of guys who were in this battle royal start to trickle into the locker room and this battle royal featured a bunch of guys, most of them could be seen on OCWTV 1 week ago. For the most part, Nanook has no idea who they are but 1 guy stands out to him. He is Mastodon.~

~Nanook watches the super heavyweight who looks like he can flip a Mack truck over remove his elbow pads. He is in a good mood since he won the battle royal and Nanook is no dummy. Always talk to the big guys when they are in a good mood. It takes everything he has, but Nanook slowly stands up, feeling every tendon in his hip cry uncle and send shooting pains down his leg into his knee. The first two steps could go either way, maybe his leg gets with the program and he starts to walk, or he falls flat on his face. Tonight, it decided to work.~

“Excuse me?” ~Nanook says as he approaches Mastodon. Mastodon looks at him, this huge fat guy hobbling towards him, god knows what he thinks.~ “Mastodon is it?” ~Nanook says as he extends his hand for a hand shake.~

“Yeah? What do you want old man?” ~Mastodon says at Nanook.~

“Oh, I just wanted to say good match out there. I watched on the monitors.” ~Nanook says which is a complete lie. He didn’t watch one second of the match.~ “I don’t want to bother anymore than I am now, Just wanted to say that was a nice win that’s all. You have a bright future ahead of you.”

“Oh. Gee, thanks. Appreciate that.”

“No problem. Sorry for buggin you.”

~Nanook says after they shake hands, Nanook pats Mastodon on the shoulder and turns to return to seat in front of his locker. As Mastodon sits down himself to unlace his boot he watch Nanook hobble back to his locker.~

“Say. If you don’t mind me asking, Why you putting yourself through this? No offense, but you ain’t in the best shape or this.”

~Nanook sits down and smiles. ~

“Yeah, you can say that again. Let’s just say that I lost a bet. My days of getting in that ring and behind me.”

“I’ll say.”

“Guys like you should be getting the time to shine in the ring instead of me. But, you know. I lost a bet so here I am.”

~Mastodon removes his boots and his knee pads.~

“What was your name again? I’m sorry but, I didn’t catch it.”

“Oh…Sorry. Name’s Nanook.”

“Nanook…..Nanook….? Why do I know that name?”

“Used to be the manager to Bester. Former OCW Craze Champion.”

“Oh yeah. I’ve seen him around. He’s, huh, special. Why you ain’t his manager anymore if you don’t me asking?”

“I don’t mind. Not at all. Like I said. Lost a bet.”

~Mastodon stands up and peels out of his tights and is now butt ass naked. Nanook wasn’t prepared for that and looks away at, looks at, looks at the wall!~

“Sounds like a shitty deal bro. Maybe you should double down and go for broke man. Maybe lady luck will be on your side.”

“Yeah…maybe.”

“Well. Good talkin’ to ya but it’s shower time man. Maybe we can hang out sometime? Rumor has it you’re a good money guy.”

“Sure. Anytime.”

“Cool.”

~ And Mastodon makes his way towards the showers.~

“Jesus, no wonder they call him Mastodon. Fucking freak.” ~Nanook says as he reaches down into his bag for more muscle rub.~

~We cut back to Smith and Hood~

Smith: The Mastodon…a former member of the OCWTV roster is here, at Massacre!

Hood: Whatever happened to OCW TV?

Smith: It got cancelled, sadly

Hood: After ONE WEEK?

Smith: When you know, you know

Hood: Ah, yea, I know

~The fans in attendance are brought to their feet when “Dr.Wily Pt. 2” hits the sound system. After a few moments we see Madman II and Princess Madwoman appear from behind the curtain, dressed in full on Madman garb, complete with masks. The two share a moment deciding who will talk first before they walk towards the ring.~

Smith: Look who it is!

Hood: More HOW guys…err, people. What’s going on around here?

Smith: It seems as though this deal Marcus Welsh ironed out with Lee Best is going to open the door for many HOW stars to appear on Massacre. You have to think we’ll see some OCW talent appear on HOW television at some point in the future, as well.

Hood: Yea, well TIO is in that tournament…as is…whatever TLS is calling himself these days

Smith: Indeed

~Once there they both give a pose, then call for a microphone. Said microphone is thrown into the ring, almost hitting Princess Madwoman, but Madman manages to catch it in midair.~

Madman: We’ve been tellin’ ya for days now we had something planned! What, you thought we were gonna go wrestle on a Carnival cruise line that ran out of gas in the middle of the Caribbean? Hell no, we wanted to be in the best place we could find! Tell me real quick, everyone, what’s this place called again!

~The capacity crowd in Key West erupts into a booming “OCW! “OCW!” chant. Madman looks back at Princess, winking with a smile. When he looks back towards the crowd, his smile grows even wider. ~

Madman: My name is Madman Szalinski. Some of you might have followed my dog on Twitter.

Princess: And I’m Princess Madwoman, fourth generation wrestler and Madman’s aunt. But before we get started, I want to send a shout out to our uncle, Mike Zybala. We’re pulling for you in the tournament, so don’t let your family down and lose!

~Princess glances over the crowd, a smile crosses her face as she does.~

Princess: We’re here to set a new standard in tag team wrestling…. Is what I’d tell you if we weren’t making a little less than four hundred dollars an appearance. The truth is, we need to make an impact so we can start making money. That is why we, Pas De Deux, have decided to come out and issue an open challenge!

Madman: That’s right! Pas De Deux! That’s French for “we will eat your heart for double the payoff”.

~Tapping on his shoulder, Princess whispers to Madman off-mic “that’s not what it means and you know it” to which Madman says “yeah, yeah, it’ll still get over”. He immediately goes back to addressing the crowd, pointing towards the aisle.~

Madman: We’re hungry as hell, we slept in and missed the hotel’s continental breakfast this morning, and we want to earn our keep! We are signed to OCW as a tag team and that’s who we want! There’s got to be two of ya somewhere back there! Come on out! We ain’t gotta do it tonight, we can wait until next week, but we just want to know if anyone will honor us by being our first match in OCW…

~After a few moments of anticipation “Punch in the face” by Frenzal Rhomb blasts through the OCW arena. The fans look around in curiosity. All of a sudden Tom and Jack Lockwood appear from the rafters and slowly make their way down to the ring to a less than favorable reaction. Last time we saw The Lockwood Party in OCW, They completely decimated their friend Bob Grenier for the sum of $100,000. They jump the railing and pace around ringside, Jack and Tom each grab a microphone.~

Jack: Well, Well, Well… What do we have here? Seems like business just picked up a little bit for you two clowns. Ask Uncle Mike, He knows us very, very well…

Tom: We come from the dirt, The grime, The goddamn East Bay and trust us, We know exactly how to get down and dirty, You just bled into a shark pond and stirred up a goddamn frenzy.. My brother and I? This is a welcoming committee you are going to wish you’d never come across.

~Jack and Tom climb into the ring and stare down Madman and Princess Madwoman. Jack throws a fake punch at Madman and laughs while Tom grabs Princess Madwoman by the face and kisses her on the cheek, almost like a kiss of death.~

Jack: We accept!

Tom: (Sarcastically) Welcome to OCW!

~Jack and Tom drop the microphones and exit the ring. They jump back over the barricade and exit through the crowd walking backwards, never taking eyes off of the new team from HOW. Tom points to Jack and back to the ring, mouthing the words “you don’t want no part of this”. Princess has one hand on Madman’s chest and the other on his shoulder, holding him back as he appears ready to leapfrog the top tope. “Come on, aren’t you gonna kiss me too?”~

Smith: Pas De Deux is here in OCW!

Hood: Dude, I’ve heard of Madman

Smith: Well, yea…his wife works here

Hood: Fuck off…I’m saying BEFORE her arrival. Guy is a huge name in wrestling…if he’s here, you know shit’s gonna get real…real fast!

Smith: I remember his dog

Hood: You would

Smith: This tag division is insane…Bob and Chad are going to have a very tough time holding on to those belts…and what better way to welcome a new team than by putting them in the ring with…The Lockwood Party.

Hood: The Lockwoods are some sleazy, scheming mother fuckers.

Smith: Indeed

~Cut backstage to reveal Who’re and one Double J Joe Jones.~

Who’re: Thanks guys. I’m joined by the manager to the former OCW Craze Champion and the number one contenders to the Tag Team Titles, Joe Jones. Joe. First off, Team ATARI.

Joe Jones: The best tag team in the sport today.

Who’re: Where did you find these guys and what did the win last week mean for them?

Joe Jones: Who’re, I didn’t find these guys, they found me! They informed me that I could help them with their mission, and before you ask, I do not know what that mission is all about as they have informed me it is highly classified. They asked if I could help them get inside the OCW, I pulled some strings and here they are, the premier tag team in this sport today. Pound for pound, Team ATARI is the best tag team you will see in tag team wrestling today. And as far as what that win last week meant to these guys? Well, Who’re, let’s just say that they have been watching video and studying up on our current OCW Tag Team Champions and if I was Chad and Bob, I would be nervous. These two are lasered focused in on winning those belts. It means everything to them and when the time comes, when Marcus sets the date, you will see new tag team champions, I promise you that!

Who’re: Ever since losing the Craze title, We have seen very little of Bester….

Joe Jones: Yes Who’re! We have not seen much of Bester, the first and only superhero of OCW as, he has been dealing with some issues. But I can announce that those issues have been dealt with and they are behind him now! OGDA, Bester, he is back! Better than ever and you will see him in action real soon! You see WHo’re! As his agent, I have secured him a spot in the 32 man tournament and trust me! Trust me! Bester is going to plow his way through this tournament and he beat everyone that is in his way and we will see Bester with championship gold around his waist real soon here in the OCW! I promise you that!

Who’re: One last question.

Joe Jones: Make it snappy Who’re! I’m a busy guy!

Who’re: Audrey Baxter….

Joe Jones: Stop! Just stop right there! This whole thing with Baxter, is just, well it’s just puppy love Who’re, and I have informed Bester that Audrey is a married women and by all accounts, a very happily married women and whatever feelings Bester had for her, they are no more. What you saw at Social Justice was fun and all, but it was Nanook leading a confused man along for his own amusement and trust me Who’re! I have dealt with Nanook personally for his actions last week! Now if you excuse me, I have some business to attend to. Thank you.

~Joe turns and exits~

Who’re: Okay? Thanks. Back to you guys!

~We cut back to the announce team~

Smith: Great news on Bester! He’s been sort of a forgotten man since Throwback

Hood: Good times

Smith: He’s got a tremendous opporunity ahead of him. Could you imagine Bester winning the tournament?

Hood: I try not to imagine nightmarish scenarios, Smith

Smith: I’m just saying…he’s one of 32 people who could easily win that thing

Hood: Are we transitioning? This feels like we’re transitioning

Smith: And, speaking of…it’s time for The Scorpion Bracket to kick things off! Let’s have a look real quick

Smith: As you can see, a ton of star power in this bracket…which, is only one of four!

Hood: This tournament is ridiculously deep. I have no idea who might win…but, if I were in it, I think I’d pick myself

Smith: Yea, that sounds about right. Anyway, we’re getting things started off with the crown jewel of OCW! The #1 overall seed, Matt Meyhu is set for action!

Hood: Two weeks in a row? Somebody needs to get in touch with his agent!

Scorpion Bracket – 1st Round
(1) ‘The Marvel’ Matt Meyhu (31-3) vs. (8) Tison Kalei (1-0)

~The fans sound eager. There is an anxious murmur hanging above the fans. That SCORPION graphic on the big screen can mean ONLY one thing…the tournament is about to begin!! Belvedere clears his throat to a huge ovation~

Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen…OCW’s Block Party tournament is officially underway!!! Tonight all contestants in the Scorpion Bracket will do battle with four advancing into the second round. Each match is a singles match, scheduled for one fall! Introducing first…

~Among the cheers and boos from the crowd, “Pain” begins to play at [:10] the lights in the arena goes dark as White search lights begin to search the sold out crowd. Tison Kalei casually makes his way out from the entrance tunnel and onto the entrance stage. The search light shines on him as he is dressed in Black tactical gear. The camera is far off but then cuts to a cameraman on the stage in front of him as Tison looks around at the crowd with no expression on his face. Looking ahead at the ring, past the cameraman, with his hands, he begins to make fists while rotating his wrists as to loosen them before getting to the ringside area. A computer generated image appears on the screen of Tison’s name before disappearing as he continues walking~

Belvedere: From The Island of Kaua’I…standing 6’3 and weighing in at 265lbs…Tison Kalei!!!

Smith: Tison Kalei drew the very last seed in this tournament. That’s not a slight against Tison…it just means he has a lot to prove.

Hood: Yea, this sort of thing can make a person’s career. He’s got a huge chance to prove people wrong…unfortunately, when you’re the very last seed in a tournament, that can only mean one thing

Smith: You’ve got to face the #1 overall seed…

Hood: Right fucking on

“LA… LA, LA LA… Wait Till I Get My Money Right…”

~“Can’t Tell Me Nothing” by Kanye West hits as the lights dim. Green lights flicker throughout the arena as Matt Meyhu walks slowly out onto the ramp. Matt poses for the fans with a smirk on his face, receiving a chorus of boos. He shrugs them off and walks down the ramp, ignoring fans who reach out to him, until he reaches the ring apron. He hops up onto it and grabs the top rope before vaulting over into the ring. Matt lands and hops up and down a few times before making his way over to his corner. He climbs up onto the middle turnbuckle and poses once more for the fans, oblivious to the reaction he is getting. He laughs as he hops down and takes his place in the corner~

Belvedere: And, his opponent…from Chicago, Illinois…standing 6’5 and weighing in at 240lbs…he is a former two time OCW Champion…he is in the OCW Hall of Fame…he is “The Marvel” Matt Meyhu!!!

~Belvedere exits and the bell sounds~

Smith: The Marvel, the number one overall seed…good luck, Tison

Hood: Yea, this match could launch Tison from rookie to main event status

Smith: There’s always a Cinderella or two in these types of tournaments…there’s no bigger chance for a bigger upset than this match, right now

~Tison stares down Meyhu. Meyhu barely notices Tison, he’s too busy basking in the glow of his Chamber win. We zoom in, spotting some staples in Meyhu’s forehead from the cut he suffered one week ago~

Smith: The Marvel might tell you he’s 100% but those staples say otherwise

Hood: Yea, it takes more than a week for a giant gash in the middle of your head to heal

Smith: Indeed…you may not like The Marvel but you have to admire his ability to overcome each and every obstacle thrown in his way.

Hood: He’s got 31 of them in front of him now

Smith: You’d be a fool to think anybody other than the man standing opposite Tison Kalei is the favorite to win this thing

~Kalei takes off, charging at Meyhu. Meyhu, in his corner, turns around and sees the oncoming bull rush. He moves out of the way and throws Kalei into the post!! Tison hits hard!! Meyhu rolls him up for a pin!!! Scruff slides in~

1!

2!

3!!

NO!!!

Smith: Kalei kicked out!

Hood: Holy fucking shit Meyhu nearly won this opening match in, like ten seconds

Smith: Wow! Tison is VERY lucky to still be alive in this tournament after that spot

~Meyhu pops back to his feet. He’s slightly annoyed the match remains active, but he remains focused. He stomps on Kalei, keeping him subdued. He snares Kalei by his long, black hair and yanks him, viciously to his feet. Meyhu DRILLS Kalei across the face with a straight right hand. Kalei falters into the ropes. Meyhu lifts a knee into Kalei’s gut, forcing the big man to cough and wheeze. Meyhu drives his elbow into the back of Kalei’s neck!! Tison falls to his knees and, instinctively, crawls away~

Smith: Matt Meyhu is taking Tison Kalei to school

Hood: Yep, the training wheels are off…this is a tournament for an OCW Title shot. It’s single elimination…there’s no time to fuck around

~Meyhu stalks Kalei from behind. He stomps Tison in the lower back! Tison flattens out. Meyhu kicks Tison in the face, flipping the big man over. He drops to his knees and makes an arrogant pin attempt~

1!

2!

KICK OUT!

Smith: Meyhu is decimating the young Tison Kalei

Hood: Yep, if this were basketball Meyhu would have a thirty point lead

Smith: But this isn’t basketball…one slip up and Tison could be back in this match

~Meyhu looks at Scruff and smiles – total arrogance. He gets to one knee. Kalei rolls onto his front, trying to get up. Meyhu slaps him in the back of the head…he pie faces the guy onto his back. Meyhu stands and extends his arms. “TOO EASY” he says. He rips Tison off the mat and hooks him for EGO TRIP. Kalei fights out of it! The fans respond with excitement (not to be confused with cheers). Meyhu appears offended. He shoves Kalei and SLAPS HIM IN THE FACE. Kalei staggers around…Meyhu whips him into the ropes, Kalei bounces off. Meyhu drops his head, looking for an Alabama Slam…Kalei jumps into the air with a knee into Meyhu’s head!!! The Marvel falls to the mat, holding his head! He kicks his legs, as though he’s in serious pain. Tison drops to all fours, still recovering from the damage he’s received~

Smith: The head! The head! He kneed Meyhu right in the head!

Hood: Oh shit!

Smith: This is serious, Hood! This is VERY serious

~Meyhu rolls over, off his back, onto his front and we see blood stains left behind. His head has been reopened! The fans gasp. The tide has officially turned. Tison gets to his feet and steadies himself. He sees the marvel, down and bleeding. A smile creases his lips. This match might very well be his to lose at this point~

Smith: This is terrible

Hood: This is like Zion Williamson going down! Stop the match!

Smith: We can’t! If Meyhu was in such vulnerable shape he should have given his spot to someone else

~Tison snares Meyhu by the hair. His hair is already soaked. Kalei drills Meyhu in the head with a punch! Red mist fills the air. Meyhu stumbles back into his corner. Tison looks at his fist, it’s covered with blood. He opens his hand and watches the blood run over his knuckles, down his palm. Kalei charges forward and CHOPS Meyhu in the chest!! It leaves a red blood stained streak across The Marvel’s chest. More red mist hits the air. Meyhu leans forward, blood raining from his forehead, to the mat. Scruff comes in to check on The Marvel~

Smith: Scruff may have to call the match, Hood

Hood: Man that would send this entire tournament into chaos

Smith: Indeed, the number one overall seed going out in the first round

~Kalei raises Meyhu up with a forearm uppercut!!! Meyhu’s head snaps back, sending blood flying into the crowd. Most people run and scream, trying to not get hit. A guy wearing an AWE.SOME shirt stands and tries to soak it in (for some reason). Kalei hugs Meyhu, spins around and plants the #1 Contender into the mat with a Belly-to-Belly Suplex!! The entire ring shakes with impact. Meyhu is reeling…he’s lost blood, he looks spaced out. Tison goes for the pin~

1!

2!

KICK OUT!

Smith: The Marvel survives…but for how much longer?

Hood: Until he runs out of blood, probably

Smith: I’d hope Scruff would stop the match before that happens!

~Kalei gets to his knees and begins to argue. He looks down and sees Meyhu fading. Scruff seems concerned. So, Tison formulates an idea. He starts to savagely punch Meyhu in the head, trying to injure the man. The fans are shocked. Some turn away. Scruff watches, his concern increasing. He finally steps in and pulls Tison away. Tison extends his arms like “What? That’s legal!” Scruff turns toward Meyhu. Kalei responds, “Well if he can’t be punched, he can’t continue…end the match!” Scruff contemplates calling the match~

Smith: Hood…I think we might see that huge upset

Hood: Fucking hell, seriously? A ref stoppage? WEAK ASS WEAK ASS

Smith: The old adage, live to fight another day

~Scruff bends down, checking Meyhu’s cut out…it’s pretty bad. He turns, looking toward the bell. The fans are yelling ‘NO!’ Scruff is caught between a rock and some place extremely unsoft. Scruff sees Meyhu roll over and a rush of blood hit the mat. He decides that’s it. He rears back to call for the bell~

Smith: Shockingly, this one is over!

Hood: This tournament is like Meyhu’s head…it’s wide open!

~Scruff motions to call for the bell but his arm is restrained!! Meyhu reaches up, holding onto Scruff’s arm, eyeing the ref through a crimson mask. Meyhu says, “No.” Scruff nods…there’s no way he’s calling for that bell now. Meyhu tries to sit up. Tison shakes his head. WEAK ASS REFFING. Tison looks down at Meyhu with derision. Meyhu is on his knees…Tison throws a kick into Meyhu’s chest. Meyhu nearly falls back…but he remains vertical. Tison snares him by the hair and boots Meyhu in the face…The Marvel doubles over~

Smith: I don’t see how Meyhu can win this thing…I know he told Scruff not to stop it but at some point the ref needs to step in for the competitor’s well being

Hood: Meyhu may die in the ring tonight. Scruff realizes that and understands that if he prevents Meyhu from dying the rest of the roster might kill him

Smith: I don’t believe that for one second

Hood: Okay, well maybe it’s only Vargas but, still…who wants to deal with an angry confederate icon?

~Tison hoists Meyhu up and throws him into the corner with a buckle bomb!!! The Marvel SLAMS into the corner! He comes staggering out…Kalei is in position…he drops Meyhu with the Kaua’i Kutter!!! The fans are STUNNED! Meyhu flips over, feet facing the corner, shoulders facing the center of the mat. Tison hurries on top, Scruff slides in~

1!

2!

3…NO!

Smith: What happened? He didn’t kick out

Hood: His shoulders are down…

Smith: Wait, look…he got his foot on the rope!

~Instant replay shows Meyhu tossing his foot on the rope right before three. Tison is LIVID. He pops to his feet, arguing with Scruff. Meyhu remains down, breathing heavily, staring off, blankly~

Smith: Tison needs to remain focused

Hood: He’s got, arguably the greatest wrestler in OCW history down. This is the biggest opportunity of his fucking career…FORGET ABOUT THE REF

Smith: Indeed

~Kalei can’t believe the match is continuing. He pleas a little while longer until his senses return, bringing into focus the fact that nothing will change what’s just taken place. So, he turns around. The Marvel remains on the mat. Tison grabs him by the hair…he frowns, sickened by the blood that continues to stain his hands. He CHOPS Meyhu across the chest, viciously. Meyhu falls into the ropes and bounces off. Tison turns around, looking for another Kaua’I Kutter!! Meyhu shoves him off! Tison turns around, Meyhu grabs him and drops him with THE EGO TRIP!! The place pops! It’s out of nowhere!!! Meyhu rolls him over and goes for the pin! Blood drips from his head to the mat…Scruff slides in with the count~

1!

2!

3!!!!

~The bell rings to a strong pop~

Belvedere: Here is your winner…and the person advancing into the round of sixteen…“THE MARVEL” MATT MEYHU!!!!!

Smith: Meyhu advances ! I can’t believe it!

Hood: Think about this for a minute…he was the huge favorite going in…yet, here we are, stunned he won

Smith: The tremendous injuries he suffered at Social Justice nearly cost him tonight. Tison Kalei put up a heck of an effort

Hood: Yea man, I mean to go toe to toe with Meyhu is beast mode. Nobody likes moral victories but Kalei shouldn’t hang his fucking head

Smith: Indeed…Meyhu survives and gets four weeks off to heal that wound on top of his head. He will face the winner of The Lost Soul and Melinda Rhodes which, ironically, is our next match!

Hood: How is that ironic?

Smith: I…I don’t know

~The screen flashes to black, then a moment of static, then to the image of an airport in France. Various people are walking about with luggage, speaking in French. The camera then zooms in and finds The Big Bifford, Earl the Popcorn Salesman, and Kenny the Intern walking towards a sign that says Sortie (French for exit). Earl is carrying several suitcases while Bifford walks unencumbered. Kenny is shaking his head and seems irritated.~

Kenny: Bifford, we are supposed to be at Massacre in Florida! Why are we in France?

Bifford: There’s a giant fish… we’ve gotta kill it.

Kenny: WHAT!? This makes no sense… Bifford… you’ve got a match next week against Mike Best… you should be in Florida setting that up and preparing for it.

~Stopping dead in his tracks, Bifford looks at Kenny for a moment, then bursts out laughing.~

Bifford: Mike Best? Like he thinks he’s the best? What a shitty name…

~Looking over at Earl, who is struggling with the luggage, Bifford laughs some more.~

Bifford: Hey Earl, who’s the best?

Earl: Matt Meyhu?

~Bifford just glares at Earl until Earl shrugs.~

Earl: You?

Bifford: Yes.. I’m the best… not Meyhu, and definitely not this Mike Best person… anyway… Kenny… there’s no need to set up this match if we apparently already have it set up…

Kenny: I set it up using your Twitter.

Bifford: Twitter?

Kenny: It’s an internet thing.

Bifford: The Internet is a fad.

~They continue walking toward the exit. ~

Kenny: Bifford… what is this about a giant fish? Why are we in France?

Bifford: Listen… if I had to explain everything to you, there would be no room for me to trash-talk my opponent… which is why we are doing this introduction to my segment this week on Massacre… so… let me just say that a decade ago I was here in France, chilling on the Lake of Saint-Croix… and I saw a large and awful fish… it could eat a dozen men at once… and since that day I’ve been planning… plotting… getting ready to come and show that fish who is the boss.

~Kenny just stares at Bifford with confusion.~

Kenny: So why are we doing this now?

Bifford: Because I’ve always wanted to show that fish who is boss… so… now is the time. And then next week on Massacre I’ll show Mike Boss that he isn’t the boss..

Kenny: Best, Bifford.. his name is Mike Best.

Bifford: Well it’s a stupid name… he isn’t the best. Mario isn’t Marvelous. And Paras? Paras ain’t Perfect… But I am Big. The Big Bifford..

~Catching up to Bifford and Kenny as the three men exit the airport, Earl looks at Kenny.~

Earl: He’s right, you know… I mean… his name fits.

~Kenny shrugs and seems to agree. Bifford signals for a taxi and then begins explaining to the driver where they need to go perfectly in French as the scene switches back to the arena.~

Smith: What a match up next week…Mike Best, an HOW legend, against a legend of our very own – Bifford

Hood: I didn’t know Biff spoke French.

Smith: Neither did I

Hood: So, you think he’s going to kill that fish?

Smith: I’d hate to speculate

Hood: He’s pretty proficient in murdering humans…but fish, they can be slippery

Smith: That was just awful

~We fade into two people standing in front of a concrete wall backstage. The two people in question are Ariel Shadows and Hayley “The Raven” Robinson. Ariel is clad in a denim jacket and black tank top with jeans, and Hayley in roughly the same – the only difference being her tank top has a Slayer logo scrawled across the front. Ariel’s forehead still bears stitches from her match at Social Justice, and Hayley’s eye is still blackened from same.~

Ariel: I’m sure a lot of you are wondering what’s happening right now.

Hayley: Some y’all prob’ly even thinkin’: hold up, ain’t y’all done beat each other’s asses a week ago? The fuck y’all doin’ showin’ up on camera together?

Ariel: The answers to that being, we sure did…and…we’ll get to that.

~The two ladies look over at each other, almost looking like they might fight again. Then again, this may also be because they have looked ready to fight this entire scene. ~

Ariel: …

Hayley: …

~Despite looking back at the camera in unison and looking to function as a cohesive unit, the tension has not left the room.~

Ariel: And now you might want to know if we’re just gonna sit here and act like Social Justice didn’t happen.

Hayley: An’ the answer to that is…HELL no. Ain’t no hidin’ this eye. Ain’t no hidin’ her head. That shit [i]done[/i] happened. But it done an’ dusted now. Time to make like Princess fuckin’ Elsa an’ let it go..

~Wait..did Little Miss Badass just make a goddamn [i]Frozen[/i] reference?~ ~…ooookay…moving right along…~

Ariel: Two things. Number one. TLS.Yeah, everyone knew this was comin’. Well, here’s the deal. I know you got a big match in that tournament coming up right about…

Hayley: …now.

Ariel: Common sense says, let’s go out there and cost you the shot at advancing in the tournament. I mean, the curtain is right over there. We could just jump on you before you even got to it. But you know what?

Hayley: Fuck that noise. More fun to see ya sweat. Maybe ya get so nervous thinkin’ bout us, you lose to homegirl all by yourself.

Ariel: And that would be the perfect revenge. You losing to Melinda Rhodes, another one of those girls you don’t like so much. You got a problem with us chicks? Well, we some dirty birds and we know it.

Hayley: Damn straight. An’ tell ya what else, dickweed. We ain’t give a damn who y’all is or who y’all think y’all is. From now on, you ain’t gotta bring no fight to us. We finna bring that shit to y’all. Express delivery style. So yeah, Mr. Lost Soul, we finna be watching yo’ ass….REAL fuckin’ close.

Ariel: Brings us to number two. You might remember, Hayley and I had a little talk during that match last week. We’ve decided that from now on, Hayley needs a new partner to watch her back. Someone who will actually get off their ass and look out for her.

Hayley: Someone who ain’t tryin’ to be my boss or my mom. Love ya, Coach…y’all still my favorite fo’real…but me an’ y’all both know with you, shit gets done y’all’s way, or the high way. Ain’t none a’ that happen with me and Ariel. We somethin’ better’n coach and student. We homegirls. We dem’ Dirty Birds, and we gon’ keep on squawkin’ and scratchin’ ‘til someone has the balls to shut us up. Anybody else finna mess with Ariel? Y’all gotta go through ME next time. And any y’all fuckers think you ‘bout to get a cheap one on me? Y;all gone need to get one over on her, too. That’s how this finna work from now on. We can take care of ourselves, and we sure as fuck gonna. But we also ‘bout to take care of each other. Ducks fly together n’shit…quack quack quack.

~…wait, Hayley’s watched Mighty Ducks?!~ ~…the more you know.~

Ariel: You’re god damn right, girl. Fist tap on that.

~Fist tap. ~

Ariel: I think that’s about it. What do you think, Hayley?

Hayley: Damn straight. I’m done talkin’. Mo’fuckers got somethin’ to say to me, they can say it in the ring. That’s where we finna be doin’ it too.

Ariel: Enjoy the rest of the show, everyone.

~Before the scene fades and the newly-christened Dirty Birds can exit the scene completely, we can hear Ariel beginning to hum and sing the “Mighty Ducks Of America” theme song, with Hayley joining in. ~

Ariel: hmmm Mig-hty Ducks…of…America….

Hayley: …a sur-ge of force…that…never dies….

~Apparently, Ariel has seen it too. Fade to commentator’s desk. ~

Smith: And another team has formed…these two bonded via the force of competition

Hood: Who is this Hayley woman? Where did she come from?

Smith: That’s Hellraven! She’s Hayley Robinson, now

Hood: So many name changes, holy smokes. That’s why I like Bifford and Meyhu. Consistency.

Smith: Hayley is growing more and more confident with every match…I feel perhaps she didn’t see the need in ‘hiding’ behind a nick name. Be real. Be yourself. It shows confidence.

Hood: Yea that works when you have a solid name. But try telling that to a guy named Arthur or some chick named Eleanor.

Smith: I’d never besmirch and individual’s name, Hood. It just isn’t fair.

Hood: Life isn’t fair, Smith

Smith: Well, I guess that’s true. The tag team division continues to heat up, Hood! Vargas and Grenier have got to be feeling the heat. Next up, however, we will see the in-ring return of Melinda Rhodes as she is set to begin her quest to earn an OCW Title shot in the 32 person tournament.

Scorpion Bracket – 1st Round
(4) The Stranger (formerly TLS) (9-4) vs. (5) “The Rebel” Melinda Rhodes (13-3)

~The fans are still buzzing after the opening match of the OCW tournament. Meyhu survived, barely. Has this set the tone for a wild and unpredictable tournament or does Meyhu simply have a WEAK ASS HEAD? I guess we’ll find out. Belvedere clears his throat to a strong ovation from the OCW Arena~

Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen the following matchup is a first round contest in the Scorpion Bracket!! Introducing first…

~”Every Breath you take” by the Police begins to play. The Stranger appears on thh entrance ramp and makes his way quickly to the ring. He slides underneath the bottom rope and then leans on the turnbuckle post. ~

Smith: The male chauvinist is back in action

Hood: Hey, he’s simply trying to improve the in ring product here in OCW. Why is that bad?

Smith: Because it means eviscerating all the female competitors!

Hood: Again, why is that bad?

~The Stranger seems statuesque. His mask turns, facing the entrance ramp as he awaits the arrival of his opponent~

Belvedere: From Parts Unknown…he is a former OCW Ascension Champion…he is…The Lost…err…he is THE STRANGER!!!

Smith: Last minute switch up here…he is now, The Stranger

Hood: So he’s what happens when you use a numb hand to jack yourself off?

Smith: I think it goes a lot deeper than that, Hood

Hood: You can stop right there! I don’t want to know.

Belvedere: And, his opponent…

~Bon Jovi’s remastered “You Give Love a Bad Name” assaults the P/A system. Through the curtains steps a fit, pale skinned, raven haired and heavily tattooed woman, her fist raised up in the air. Her dark brown eyes wander over the crowd as she stands upon the stage, taking it all in for a moment. On her face we find dark crimson painted on her full lips and red highlighted black eye shadow over her eyes. Her modest chest is contained by a fringed red and blue leather vest and black leather bra, while her ass is covered by black and silver tights. She sports standard black pads on her elbows and knees, with knee high laced wrestling boots to match. On her wrists are red, white, and blue bands. Upon her hips rests a thick black leather belt with a large and square silver buckle that reads in an ornate font, “REBEL.” ~

Belvedere: ON HER WAY TO THE RING….

~She makes her way to the ring with a confident stride. It doesn’t take her long to reach ringside. She climbs the steps, wipes her feet on the apron, and slips through the ropes. Rebel Rhodes then backs into a corner of her choosing and waits…..~

Belvedere: FROM ROME, GEORGIA, STANDING AT FIVE FEET AND ELEVEN INCHES TALL AND WEIGHING IN AT ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY TWO POUNDS…

RRRRRREEEEBBBBBEEEEEELLLLL RRRRRRHHHHHHOOOOODDDDDDEEEESSSSS!!!!

~Melinda raises her arm with a three finger salute to the fans~

Smith: And she’s back!

Hood: Hell has frozen over!

Smith: OCW is all about second chances, especially if you’re a competitor with some talent. Rhodes was a major part of this promotion in 2018, helping us grow during her stay. Sadly, things were interrupted due to some backstage issues. But, she’s back and hopefully better than ever!

~Belvedere exits the ring. The bell rings. The fans are chanting “REBEL! REBEL! REBEL!” The Stranger keeps his statuesque posture, turning his face in the direction of Rebel. Rhodes bounces around, light on her feet, full of anxious energy, ready to get her return underway~

Smith: Melinda understands the opportunity in front of her. She’s been waiting for this chance since December

Hood: Yep…winner of this gets Meyhu, right?

Smith: Indeed

~Rhodes looks around, it’s clear she’s happy to be back and nearly overwhelmed by the response. The Stranger suddenly charges at Rhodes!! Melinda, in her corner, sees him coming. She uses her veteran prowess to wait at just the right moment before moving out of the way! The Stranger slams into the corner! Rhodes throws a high kick to the back of his head, sending him staggering back into the corner. Melinda hustles over, jumps up, places her legs in The Stranger’s back…falls over and performs an inverted Monkey Flip!! The Stranger flips over, landing face first on the mat! The fans are on fire! ‘REBEL! REBEL!’ She pops to her feet, nodding along, giving the fans some love~

Smith: She loves this profession, Hood. It means so much for her to be back!

Hood: I may not like her…but, yea, I can appreciate that.

Smith: Nice to see you aren’t completely heartless

Hood: If I was, I’d be dead you idiot

~The Stranger looks up. It’s impossible to make out his expression because he’s wearing a Rorschach mask. But, we’re pretty sure he’s pissed. Rhodes is back to her feet. She sees Stranger’s lifted head…Melinda, a competitor well versed in the art of putting an opponent away, sprints forward for the kill…she throws a penalty kick at The Stranger’s face! The Stranger ducks!! Rhodes stumbles forward. The Stranger rushes to his feet…he spins around, grabbing Rhodes by the waist. She tries to break free, but his grip is too strong. She throws some back elbows, they have minimal effect. The Stranger lifts her up and tosses her over his head with a Release German!!! Rhodes lands head first on the mat!! The crowd is silenced…they look on, concerned! She’s folded up, at first…before slouching to her side. The Stranger is already back on his feet, showing an increased level of quickness~

Smith: I can’t believe I’m saying this…but he looks somehow better as The Stranger

Hood: That’s because he’s covering that joke of a face

Smith: His face has always been covered

Hood: What are you saying, Smith? He’s always been…a stranger?

~The Stranger grabs Rhodes by the hair, yanking her up. He slams her, face first into the top buckle. She turns around, wincing. The Stranger rears back and unleashes several right hands into the side of her face, seemingly aiming for the tattoo above the corner of her left eye. He finishes after several right hands make their mark, reddening that side of Melinda’s face. He lifts her up, spins around and plants her into the mat with a spinebuster! The fans are booing The Stranger! They begin to chant “REBEL!” hoping they might inspire Melinda to fire up. The Stranger slides out of the ring and looks underneath the mat, removing a table~

Smith: What’s he doing?!

Hood: Getting a table

Smith: He’s become a monster since putting on that…that mask!

Hood: Hey, he’s simply playing by the rules WE set. If he had his way, Melinda would be parading around the ring in a bikini holding up a sign that reads “ROUND 2”…if, ya know, we had rounds.

Smith: And we’d all be deprived of her fighting spirit and tremendous heart

~The Stranger sets the table up right outside the ring, at the bottom of the ramp. He slides back into the ring and goes directly for Rhodes without any wasted motion. He pulls Melinda to her feet and kicks her in the gut. He lifts her up for a powerbomb and turns toward the ropes, facing the table. The crowd yells ‘NO!’ The Stranger doesn’t listen. He lifts Rhodes up! Melinda bends backward, wrapping her legs around The Stranger’s head and pulling him forward with a Frankensteiner!!! The Stranger dives through the ropes!!! He holds on, to keep from going through the table! The fans go wild!! Rhodes remains on the mat, recovering from the damage that’s been done. The Stranger is on the apron, hanging on by the middle rope~

Smith: Great reversal by Rebel!! This would have likely been over had The Stranger pulled that powerbomb through the table off

Hood: Man, he’s going for the fucking jugular

Smith: Indeed

~The Stranger finds his balance and manages to stand on the apron. Rhodes is suddenly back on her feet. She looks at The Stranger. The Stranger looks over his shoulder…Rebel smiles. She charges and ducks her head…The Stranger leaps over the top rope, diving over the incoming Rhodes. He tucks his head, rolls over and pops back to his feet. Rebel adjusts, leaping up, spring boarding off the middle rope with a moonsault. She catches The Stranger’s head on the way down and drops him with a DDT!!! The crowd goes wild!! Rhodes manages to rolls The Stranger over and cover him for a pin~

1!

2!

Shoulder Up!!!

Smith: The Stranger got the shoulder up!

Hood: I hate calling him The Stranger

Smith: Well, that’s his name now

Hood: I never thought I’d yearn for face paint

~Rhodes slaps the mat…she was | | this close! She remains focused…this isn’t over yet. The Stranger stirs. Rhodes backs into a corner, preparing to pounce. The fans rise…Shot in the Dark appears to be on the horizon~

Smith: One of the most devastating finishers of 2018! If Rhodes hits this…it’s lights out for The Stranger

Hood: His lights might already be out, Smith. It could be pretty fucking dark underneath all that facial shit

Smith: He’s moving around well enough to know there’s some visibility

Hood: Why anyone would wear a mask bottles my mind!

Smith: Bottles?!

Hood: I meant boggles! Fucking masked people

~The Stranger stands. Rhodes runs up, looking to secure his head into position. He ducks! Rhodes misses her opportunity…she keeps running, hitting the ropes and bouncing off. The Stranger lunges forward with a huge lariat…Melinda performs the Matrix Evasion. The Stranger stumbles forward. Rhodes is already upright…she spins around, facing the back of The Stranger. She throws a Savate Kick to the back of his head! He staggers. She slides in with a baseball kick to the back of his leg, dropping him to one knee. She’s already back on her feet, kicking The Stranger in the face! He false onto his back. She rushes, this the ropes, springboards off with another moonsault, this time onto a prone Stranger, for the pin! She hooks the leg~

1!

2!

SHOULDER UP!

Smith: The Stranger survives…how much more does he have left in him?

Hood: I don’t know, but Rhodes is fucking him up at the moment

Smith: She is showing no mercy on The Stranger

Hood: So since he’s now The Stranger…does that mean he found his soul?

Smith: I have no clue

~Rhodes can’t believe it! What does she have to do to keep The Stranger down?! She returns to her feet, looking at Scruff and shaking her head. She’s not angry with him…she’s just surprised The Stranger has survived all this offense. The fans are still behind her…they cheer her on, encouraging Melinda to strive ahead, fight forward…don’t give up! She’s feeding off their energy. The Stranger struggles to his feet…he appears nearly out. Rhodes rushes up and looks for Shot in the Dark!! The Stranger, smashes her in the back of the head! He drops down and schoolboys her into a pin!! The crowd is like “OH NO!” Scruff slides in~

1!

2!

3…NO!

Smith: Rebel kicked out!

Hood: Damn, Stranger Danger!

Smith: That’s what he calls it!

Hood: Just slipped in there looking for a score

~Rhodes is quickly up, realizing how close she came to being snuffed out of the tournament by The Stranger. The Stranger is also up, looking nearly recovered from the offense. He throws a clothesline at Rhodes. She ducks and drills The Stranger in the gut with a knee. He doubles over. She lifts the same knee into his face, straightening him up. She then goes for her third Shot in the Dark. She gets his head secured and jumps into the air…The Stranger, though, holds her into the air and he tosses her out of the ring!!! Rhodes goes flying over the top rope and THROUGH the table!! The fans are stunned!! She’s down…she might be out! The Stranger looks down at her, over the top rope~

Smith: Oh my gosh!!! Rhodes could be seriously injured!

Hood: Chekhov’s Gun

Smith: Excuse me?

Hood: That table…we all knew it was getting used

~The Stranger exits the ring. He hops down, onto his feet and kicks around the table debris, finding Rhodes underneath a couple of giant pieces of broken wood. He grabs her by the hair, yanks her up, violently and throws her back into the ring, under the bottom rope. He slides in, quickly and crawls toward Melinda, who is now on her back. He makes the cover. The fans are quiet, somber…they await the ending~

1!

2!

3…

NO!

Smith: The Rebel lives!

Hood: Geezus…what does it take to keep this woman down?

Smith: More than what we’ve seen, apparently

~The Stranger is unmoved. He rolls out of the ring. Rebel is left in the ring to recover…regain her senses. We cut to a shot of The Stranger as he rummages underneath the ring. Scruff is checking on Rhodes to make sure she’s okay after that terrible fall~

Smith: What is The Stranger doing?

Hood: Strange things

Smith: I don’t know why I ever bother asking you anything relevant

~Melinda returns to her feet…she tells Scruff she’s okay. She walks with a slight limb, her tailbone is likely bruised. She realizes The Stranger is outside the ring. She heads for the ropes and leans through them, looking for her opponent. She finds him and reaches for his shirt. The Stranger responds by pulling something out from under the ring and slinging it at Melinda! It’s a steel chair! She dodges the blow, grabs the chair and rips it away! The tosses it aside…as she does, The Stranger slides into the ring. Rhodes is seething~

Smith: The Rebel isn’t too happy that The Stranger attempted to cheat to win this match

Hood: She’s here to compete, Smith. That’s her first mistake.

Smith: She’s yet to make a mistake…she’s looked great!

~The Stranger is already in the ring. Rhodes, sensing something is coming, turns around and instantly ducks. She was right! The Stranger throws a right hand! She dodges it and hooks The Stranger for the beginning of a Rock Bottom. The Stranger elbows her in the side of the head…she lets go. He spins her around and, again, throws a straight right hand…she dodges it and begins throwing jabs and punches of her own, peppering The Stranger with quick and impactful blows. He stumbles back, into a corner, reeling from the assault. The fans are on their feet chanting “REBEL!”~

Smith: There are those highly skilled hands of hers! You don’t want to get into a boxing match with Melinda Rhodes!

Hood: I feel like she’s better than I remember.

Smith: She looks very sharp tonight!

~Rhodes continues to pound The Stranger with lefts and rights. Scruff comes in, looking to secure a break. The Stranger lunges forward, squashing Scruff in between the two…he staggers to the side and loses his bearings, taking his eyes off the match. Rhodes is like “What the fuck was that for?” The Stranger reaches out and smacks Rhodes in the face with a right hand!! She’s stunned…more so than you’d expect. She staggers around. Scruff is back, paying attention to what’s going on…The Stranger slides in and rolls Rhodes up…as she’s taken down, we notice a bit of blood at the edge of her mouth. Scruff slides in~

1!

2!

3!!!!

~Rhodes kicks out RIGHT AFTER 3…but, it’s too late. The bell rings. The fans boo heavily~

Belvedere: Here is your winner…and the contestant that will go on to round two of the tournament…THE STRANGER!!!!!

~The Stranger pops to his feet. Scruff reaches to raises his hand. He shuffles something from his right hand to his left hand, depositing it into his pant pocket. The fans continue to boo. Rhodes is on her back, feeling around her mouth~

Smith: What happened? How did one punch impact her so severely?

Hood: I’m guessing The Stranger throws better punches now that he’s got SOUL

Smith: No…something isn’t adding up here. Did you see him switch an item from one hand to the other post match?

Hood: Nah, I don’t look that closely at stuff.

~The Stranger exits the ring and heads up the ramp. Rhodes sits up and looks around…it’s obvious that she’s pissed, frustrated, maybe even emotional. She brings her knees in and wraps her arms around them, lowering her head…almost as though she’s wondering why she came back~

Smith: Keep your head up, Melinda! You did yourself proud!

Hood: Yea, I’m no fan but she did great

~The fans let out a massive “REBEL!” chant. They aren’t giving up on her…they don’t care that she barely lost the match…they are still huge fans of hers! Rhodes looks up, hearing the chants. Scruff offers her a hand. She politely declines and stands, looking out at the crowd. They continue to chant her name. She smiles…she throws an arm into the air to a huge ovation~

Smith: Tremendous…proper respect being shown by these fans. They’ve missed her…I’ve missed her! I hope that’s not the last we’ll be seeing of her.

Hood: Yea man she fought hard…I thought she was going to win this, to be honest. But…these things are unpredictable. Still, no shame given the effort she put in.

Smith: None at all…thank you, Melinda for participating and we hope to see more of you in the future! You definitely belong in OCW.

~Somewhere in a secured location outside of the OCW Arena is Team ATARI and it appears to be on top of a high rise building with the OCW Arena in the background.~

~2600
7800
Flashback 2~

~Collectively known as Team ATARI have gathered and they are standing around a old iron wrought bistro table and on the this table is 3 small covered dishes, old round butter dishes.~

2600 “7800! You were excellent in battle last week at Mission Social Justice, Operation Numero Uno”

7800 “Dilly dilly!”

Flashback 2 “Ahhhh! How sweet.”

2600 “Stop, you’re going to make me blush.”

7800 “Dilly dilly!”

2600 “Yes….and thank you for those kind words. Last week, we worked as a team and it was our team work 7800, trusting one another! Remembering our training when we were just wee little cadets at the academy that ultimately lead to our victory last week.”

7800 “Dilly dilly!”

~Flashback 2 smirks and tries to hide it with his hand. 2600 pauses and nods.~

2600 “Correct, we could have been the superior team in battle as week.”

7800 “Dilly dilly!”

2600 “Again, you could be correct in that the other teams were just inferior pawns in the Yamauchi army and that we dispatched them rather easily and we’ll never see them again. Whatever the reason is, We were victorious in the face of the enemy and we won the battle and now we live to fight one more day. We are one more step closer to the Energon Devise and the great battle lays ahead of us with two more Yamauchi scum, the keepers of the cubes and those two shall be dealt with! Nothing and NO ONE will stop us from capturing the Energon Devise!”

7800 “DILLY DILLY!”

2600 “YES! We will spill blood! The keepers of the cubes have no idea what great hell awaits them! BUT! First!”

~2600 takes a deep breath and tries to calm down.~

2600 “As promised. We get to enjoy a victory MSH07C!”

Flashback 2 “I can’t wait anymore! It has been forever since we had a MSH07C! No more talking! Let’s eat!”

7800 “DILLY DILLY!”

2600 “I couldn’t disagree with you 7800! Team! Let’s dig in!”

~They quickly uncover the MSH07C! On the plate is a single, gold wrapped MSH07C! (Or as us normal, non undercover people know them as a Hershey Kiss.) Flashback 2 unwraps her MSH07C and pops the chocolatey goodness in her mouth and savors every single ounce of it.~

Flashback 2 “Oh! This is so good! It’s like heaven!”

7800 “Dilly! Dilly!”

2600 “hmmm. Roger that!”

~And just like that, the celebration is over with.~

2600 “Now. I have one more surprise for you. The PTB sent us a new tool to use in this war for the Energon Devise. A useful tool. A tool to help in keeping an eye on our new targets, targets that have been assigned code names Bert and Ernie.”

Flashback 2 “Really? A new tool?”

2600 “Perhaps Flashback 2, a weapon is more fitting and it has been in use this whole time!”

7800 “Dilly dilly?”

2600 “Yes! This whole time! If you would look up….”

~7800 and Flashback 2 look up.~

Flashback 2 “Whoah! Look at that!”

7800 “Dilly dilly!”

2600 “7800! Flashback 2! May I introduce you to, OneRoverOne! Our undercover, undetectable eye in the sky!”

~A stealthy looking drone lowers from the sky to about eye level with the team. It is black, all angled so it can’t be picked up on radar and whisper quite, this isn’t on the market and has not been seen before today. High tech, highly classified stuff right here!~

Flashback 2 “So cool!”

7800 “Dilly dilly!”

2600 “OneRoverOne will keep a eye on Bert and Ernie for us, reporting all of their movements. Team! We have the upper hand in this upcoming battle. Bert and Ernie will never see us coming and before they can even react, the battle will be over and we will have section 4 and section 5 of the Energon Devise! This great nations national security is at risk and with you, and you, and me and OneRoverOne, we can’t lose! Team ATARI is about to flip these Yamauchi scumbags on their ears and send them back to their mama’s crying a river!”

7800 “Dilly dilly!”

2600 “Fist bump me! OneRoverOne! You know what to do!”

~OneRoverOne spins in a circle, then shoots itself up the sky and makes a b line towards the OCW Arena.~

~Fade to the announcer’s desk~

Smith: Team ATARI!

Hood: All these new teams and THESE are the guys getting the title shot. CLASSIC OCW, BABY

Smith: I can’t wait for that match at Block Party!

~OCW Massacre returns from commercial. The lights dim, the crowd grows restless between matches~

“Now, I grew up down an old dirt road in a town you wouldn’t know

My pop’s picked the place up for fifteen hundred bucks back in 1964

My grandfather was a drinker, back in the day, he put him down

But a war is known to change a man and the whiskey’s known to change a man”

~Aaron Lewis’ “Country Boy” controls the OCW sound system. A confederate flag is seen on the OCW-Tron waving high and proud. The crowd flooded with offended millennials begins to boo. After a few seconds, Chad Vargas appears atop the ramp, wearing the OCW Tag team championship proudly around his waist. The warrior that is Chad Vargas gingerly raises his arms in the air, still feeling the burn from Social Justice’s war. As he feeds off the negative input from the crowd. He smirks arrogantly as he begins his strut down the aisle, taking his time stopping to jaw jack and hurl obscenities at the crowd as he saunters by. He stops at a a purple haired… well, it’s either a dude or it isn’t, we can’t tell. ~

Hood: Geezus…

Smith: For the love of God, Chad, just leave this poor guy alone!

Hood: So, it IS a guy?

Smith: Hm. Well, you got me there!?

~The queer in question holds a sign triumphantly that reads ‘BUILD BRIDGES NOT WALLS.’ The kid is hooting and hollering at Vargas while he holds his sign in Vargas’ face. Big Bad Chad smirks arrogantly, laughing at this disgrace of a human being. He turns his attention to a drunk guy nearby in a Dale Earnhardt hat and clutching a bottle of Jack Daniels. ~

Smith: How did he get in here with that?

Hood: Because he’s a badass that’s why! Security doesn’t pick fights with NASCAR fans!

Smith: Yeah but, that’s a half gallon of whiskey! What about Stevie at the concession stand. He’s been running that booth for 20 years!

Hood: Seriously? Have you seen the beer prices in here!?

~Before Smith can comment, he pulls a Bud Light from under the announce table and cracks it open, taking a discreet pull from the beer can. The camera’s eye a crushed 12 pack box by Hood’s feet. ~

Smith: You too?!?! That really hurts our bottom line.

Hood: You’re such a suck ass! If I had a Strawberry Delight wine cooler, you know you’d crack one!

Smith: Touche.

~Chad Vargas still eyes the purple haired twirp up and down. The Dale Earnhardt fan eggs him on. ‘BEAT HIS FUCKING ASS CHAD! KICK THE GAY OUT OF THAT SUM BITCH!’ Vargas turns to continue his journey to the ring, but stops before turning back around toward the millennial. Out of NOWHERE, Vargas leaps up over the barricade and catches this kid with a MASSIVE head butt. The headbutt obliterates this poor bitch. Instantly his nose shatters, blood spurts out everywhere. His stupid ass sign falls to the ground. The Dale Earnhardt fan whom is covered in this kid’s blood rages on. ‘FUCK YESSSS!!!!! THIS REMINDS ME OF THE TRAVIS TRITT CONCERT I WENT TOO WHEN I WAS 17!!!’ ~

Hood: Travis Tritt? Really? Who the fuck…

Smith: OMG! How can you care about a washed up country music singer?!

~Chad Vargas just put that poor kid’s nose down his throat! CALL THE POLICE! ~

Hood: For his sake, I hope they build a bridge directly to the Lower Keys Medical Center!

Smith: All these years together and I still cannot fathom your insincerity!

Hood: Kid had it coming!

~You cannot hear yourself think in the OCW arena, the boos outweigh anything else. Vargas looks down at his handy work smiling. The Dale Earnhardt fan continues to yip. He leans over the barricade and extends his hand. Vargas bumps his fist and nods. He grabs the bottle of Jack Daniels from his other hand and takes a haul straight off the handle. He nods handing it back to the redneck. The crowd continues to display their disapproval. Vargas raises his hands in the air as if he just won the OCW title. OCW paramedics accompanied by The Knife Man, quickly rush to the aid of the fallen libtard. Vargas laughs as he continues his way to the ring. He eyes another bitch in a Melinda Rhodes t-shirt and a Purple VIP headband. His sign reads ‘EQUALITY! TRUMP THE HATE!’ Vargas stops before this idiot.~

Vargas: You want some too, pussy!?

~The bitch cowers. Vargas smiles as he fakes a bitch slap. He finally makes his way to the steel steps and climbs slowly into the ring, and under the bottom rope. Belvedere has seen this movie before, he quickly hands him a microphone and fucks off. Vargas takes the OCW tag title off his waist and raises it in the air, mouthing more unheard obscenities as he does it. The crowd ERUPTS into more booes. Vargas slashes his fingers across his throat as his music INSTANTLY cuts off. ~

Vargas: WHAT UP FLORIDA!

~Boos. Vargas can’t even get your run of the mill cheap ‘insert state here’ pop.~

Vargas: Uh huh. Yahhht. FUCK YOU ALL. The Southern Demagogue himself is back at home in the SOUTH. A fucking red state, and all you dipshits boo me. WHERE IS THE LOVE OCW!? You unamerican, limp wristed, SHIT TWISTS! All you California cake boys followed the warpath to Key West I see. 2019 OCW is such a fucking joke!

~Vargas sighs as he adjusts his tag championship onto his shoulder. ~

Vargas: First and foremost, it’s time for celebration! All you ass-whistles thought Lurrr and PerZag had us dead to rites. HA! Guess what!? SWING AND A MISS! I want to personally thank the big dork Rick Mathis for the help. Next time, Rick, stay the fuck in your own lane!

~Vargas smirks as the crowd picks up a LURRRZAG chant. He rolls his eyes and presses on. ~

Vargas: Welcome back Melinda Rhodes! We are SO happy to have you back in the fray! Just stay the fuck out of the ring and keep your mouth SHUT. If you want to do anything, make me a ham and cheese on rye, hold the mayo!

~The crowd boos, YET AGAIN. Vargas got a kick out of his comment~

Smith: He really needs some new material!

Hood: And I really need a ham and cheese on rye!

Vargas: Know what you’re talking about, cunt, before you open that fat mouth of yours and insert a big hairy cock like you’re so good at! I have never been fired from Online Championship Wrestling. It’s actually quite the opposite, genius. I am OCW’s LIFE BLOOD. I will be here after you get fired AGAIN, and I will be here long after you’re just an afterthought. A never-was. I think my buddy Bob hit you two hard during your TWO LOSSES earlier this year, because you’re fucking delusional. If you want to be equal to a man, grow some balls and stop being such a cry baby about WORDS. If you can’t take the heat, stay in the kitchen!

Smith: Doesn’t he mean out of the kitchen?

Hood: …He’s talking about a woman, dude…

Smith: OH CRAP! Can you believe this guy? It’s always the same old crap. I’m not even a woman and i’m offended by his blatant sexism!

Hood: But you’re also a bitch, so there’s that…

Vargas: Before I get into too much celebrating, I wanted to get my partner, the other half of the OCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS out here… so… without any further ado…

Where the hood…

Where the hood…

Where the hood at…

~The crowd erupts into more boos. Bob Grenier emerges from the back in all his f’n glory! He holds his tag team title on his shoulder and slowly makes his way towards the ring. As he does so he spots a young millenial in the crowd, This girl has her face glued to her cell phone and is paying to attention to the show. Bob grabs her phone and smashes it on the floor of the OCW Arena and screams at her to “pay attention”. He has words with a few members of the crowd before he makes his way into the ring. He fist bumps his tag team partner and Vargas hands over the mic.~

Bob: Robin Toth, White Sky.. You want to interfere in my business? Our business? You millenial fuck’s better take notice of who I am and tow the line, tread real fuckin’ lightly. Next time you want to come out and wave that fuckin’ wand in my face I’m going to snatch it and stick it straight up your waiting ass. I can respect trying to spread a message, I can respect having differing views and opinions but quite frankly, I will not be censored! I will not change my ways for anyone and I will not be made to look weak. I will not be made a fool of. I will continue to live my life the way I choose to live it.

~The crowd chants “WE ARE THE SKY” silently and in unison. Bob looks perturbed by this. Vargas’ eyes widen as he scans the crowd. The poor Dale Earnhardt fan from earlier can’t even be seen. Probably stomped on by maddened White Sky ANTIFA rejects.~

Bob: Shut the hell up! We are the OCW Tag Team champions and we are building this division, building this company from the ground up. Team Atari, The Bachelors, Ehufford, Danger BoiZ, Whoever decides they wanna step into our ring, Let me make one thing crystal clear..

~They boo louder as Chad and Bob raise the titles~

Bob: You can’t touch these!!

Hood: Brutal fucking crowd! Shut the fuck up already! The champs are speaking!!!

Smith: #WEARETHESKY

Hood: Are you for real? You’re an embarrassment.

~Belvedere tosses Vargas’ a second mic, before he asks. Vargas plucks it out of the air and raises it to his mouth.~

Vargas: I will personally lynch every one of you motherfuckers if you don’t shut the fuck up!

~Vargas spits a nasty loogie at a chick sitting front row. It lands in her forehead and runs down her face. She shrieks in horror. Vargas and Grenier laugh. ~

Vargas: White Sky! Robin Toth, and the fish… You’re looking at the Wrekkking Kkkrew!

~The crowd gasps. Even though they can’t see the words. Vargas looks directly at an OCW employee ringside and points at him.~

Bob: You millennial pussy’s can keep practising your social consciousness, keep preaching your equality and liberal views, your political correctness.. but know, WE REPRESENT GENERATION X! We will stick it to the goddamn man and say what we want to say, We will keep doing what we want to do, Believing what we want to believe with any interference from White Sky. They will never get one over on us again.

Vargas: Don’t you dare edit that, motherfucker! Bob, tell us about that SLUT Andrea Hernandez and the WEAK ASS BOOKING from this past Monday night…

Bob: Oh you mean Ms. Run for cover? Ms. Duck a challenge? Ms. Win and bounce? Where is she now? Who the hell really knows? You can’t run far Andrea, You can’t run from me, You can’t run from Big Bad Chad and you sure as hell can’t avoid Mack forever.. You want nothing to do with us now.. But the day is coming where cross paths again, You may have pinned my shoulders to the mat but I assure you that was a goddamn accident and that will never happen again. I will have my rematch with you Andrea, whether it’s given to me or whether I have to earn it, I will be seeing you again in this ring.. Now Melinda Rhodes..

~The crowd cheers at the mention of her name.~

Bob: I don’t know would ever possess you to come back to the fold. You’ve made a mistake in doing so, I assure you that. I’ll keep this short and sweet.. If you ever mention my name again..

~The camera pans in really close and Bob flashes and evil looking grin.~

Bob: I will rape your career in the middle of this ring!

Hood: I have reason to believe Grenier will be reprimanded for that comment.

Smith: I see another session with D’eangelo Vickers in his future.

Bob: Yeah, I said that. I dare any choad in the back to come out here and shut my mouth. I know that isn’t going to happen! You know why? I’m the grand wizard of professional wrestling and along with Chad “Red Dragon” Vargas, This is our realm and nobody has the goddamn balls to come out here and stop this burial.

~Bob stops speaking and the crowd begins a loud “asshole” chant.~

Vargas: I didn’t think so!

~Bob and Chad drop the mics as “Country Boy” by Aaron Lewis hits again. The OCW Tag Team Champions exit the ring clutching the titles proudly and walk up the stage to an incredibly loud chorus of boos.~

Smith: Some incendiary remarks by the champions. They aren’t here to make friends.

Hood: Who needs friends when you’re Chad Vargas and Bob Grenier?

Smith: With so many eyes on OCW right now, you have to wonder what management thinks about these two speaking in such a filthy manner on television.

Hood: They can’t be too upset…shit aired, didn’t it?

Smith: Indeed it did…OCW has always and will always be a place that only censors when absolutely necessary.

~Backstage we see John E. Depth, Shootah and Jack Puffer limping down a hallway, presumably with a destination in mind. They’re all pretty beat up from their matches from earlier this evening. However, their spirits remain relatively high. They chat amongst each other, but whatever they say is inaudible due to the fact that no one gives a shit. They continue walking as we see PerZag walk past them, neither the Job Squad nor PerZag take any notice of each other, until PerZag stops in his tracks, looks back, and charges at the Job Squad from behind~

~PerZag hits John E. Depth in the back of the head, making him drop to the ground, before throwing a punch at Shootah, dropping him. Puffer turns around, before being grabbed by PerZag, and thrown into the wall behind him, head first. Puffer drops down to the ground, in a seated position before PerZag runs up, booting him in the face, knocking him out. PerZag turns around, and heads towards Depth and Shootah.~

~He grabs Shootah, lifting him off of the ground, into a powerbomb position, before throwing him into a wall, back first. Shootah drops to the ground in pain, as PerZag grabs Depth, pulling him up to his feet. PerZag hooks him up, lifting him in the air, and dropping him on the ground with a Perfect Plex better known as PerZag Perfection. PerZag stands up, and turns away from the wreckage, walking away, muttering to himself, as the medical staff race past him to check on the three jobbers of OCW.~

PerZag: I’m not fucking done yet.

~PerZag looks back as the medical staff start to check on Depth, Shootah and Puffer, and PerZag smiles. With a menacing grin, PerZag turns back, and walks off down the hallway. We cut back to ringside~

Smith: PerZag is furious

Hood: Yea man it wasn’t supposed to be this way, ya know? He was supposed to form this dream team with Lurrr, win the titles and bask in the heat of championship spotlight. Instead, they lost…there’s tension…he’s overlooked in favor of all the new, big names debuting in the company…it’s rough

Smith: I’m not sure if attacking people backstage is the best way to go about it. Seems like he’s throwing a fit, to me.

Hood: He’s trying to get noticed, Smith.

Smith: We’ll see if it works. And, speaking of PerZag, his…well, I guess we might refer to him as PerZag’s former tag partner, OCW legend Lurrr is scheduled to make his first in ring appearance on Massacre in…over a decade?

Hood: It’s been for fucking ever…he helped build this brand, this show. It’s great to have him back.

Smith: He’s scheduled to face Jason Kortare in a first round match…let’s head down to ringside for what should be a great first round match!

Scorpion Bracket – 1st Round
(2) Lurrr (1-1) vs. (7) Jason Kortare (2-1)

~The crowd remains hot. It’s obvious that tonight’s matches carry great weight. The road to Block Party is going to be a long and unpredictable experience. Belvedere clears his throat to a boisterous ovation~

Belvedere: Ladies and gentlemen the following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a first round match within the Scorpion Bracket!! Introducing first…

~”A mixture of red and yellow lights begin to flicker among the stage. “Welcome to the Party” By French Montana (Feat. Lil’ Pump & Zhavia Ward) begins to blast among the P.A. system. Jason Kortare walks among the stage with his head down and a towel hanging over his shoulders. He begins to shadow box with his fists aggressively on the stage. He makes his way down the ramp entrance way, he takes the towel off his shoulders and throws it into the crowd. He climbs up the ring post and steps inside the ring. Making his way to the center of the ring, he raises his arms high in victory. Putting his arms down, he makes his pecs bounce up and down with a serious and somewhat mysterious stare at a few of the women sitting in the front of the crowd~

Belvedere: From The Bronx…standing 6’4 and weighing in at 247lbs…Jason Kortare!!!

Smith: Kortare looked great in his tag match at Social Justice. Sadly, he and Jackson Black were unable to overcome Team ATARI

Hood: Wasn’t Kortare’s fault…guy busted his ass.

Belvedere: And, his opponent…

GUESS WHO’S BACK
Smith: And here he comes!

Hood: Lurrr in singles action!

Smith: First time we’ve seen him in singles action in FOUR years!

I used to be broke, confused..no joke
Got used, smoked dope, paid dues
Refused to give up quick,
Now theres 10 million motherfuckers on my dick

~The original OCW legend appears from behind the curtain. He’s got his Hall of Fame Championship over his shoulder. He looks out to the crowd with appreciation. He turns toward the ring and switches to a look of determination. Kortare paces back and forth, keeping a watch on his opponent. Lurrr smirks and hustles down the ramp, charging toward the ring and sliding in under the bottom rope. Chants of “LURRR!” echo throughout the arena! He pops to his feet and points at Kortare, talking trash. Kortare continues to pace, like a caged animal, ready for the bell to ring~

Belvedere: And his opponent, from Houston, Texas…he is a 3 Time OCW Champion, he is in the OCW Hall of Fame…he is the reigning OCW Hall of Fame Champion…he is the original legend of OCW…he is…LURRRR!!!!!

~Lurrr steps up onto the second buckle and holds his HOF title high and proud. The crowd chants “LURRRRRRRRRRRRR!” really dragging out that third r. Belvedere exits the ring. Lurrr hops off the apron and hands the exiting announcer his HOF title~

Smith: You know it’s a special night when Lurrr’s in the ring

Hood: Yea man the guy’s got nothing left to prove. He’s out here because he wants to compete

Smith: Indeed

~The bell rings. The fans continue to chant for Lurrr. Kortare finally stops pacing and tweaks his neck to the left, then to the right, loosening up. Lurrr removes his cowboy hat and tosses it into the crowd to a HUGE pop~

Smith: An amazing opportunity for Kortare

Hood: Dude, if he beats Lurrr…holy shit, man. The guy will be instant money

~Lurrr slaps both arms before rotating his shoulders. He flashes a cocky look Kortare’s way. Lurrr’s in ‘enjoyment’ mode…guy has done this so much it’s second nature. The butterflies died out long ago. Kortare, meanwhile, has a look of hunger. Opportunity is one successful pounce away. They circle one another before locking up! Lurrr struggles with the youthful strength of Kortare. He starts to give way…he fights back and shoves Jason. They break. Neither man moves all that much. Lurrr smiles and hops around, fired up. Kortare rushes in for another lock up. They struggle against one another yet again. Kortare seems to gain a bit of ground as Lurrr audibly struggles to maintain his position. Kortare gives Lurrr a shove! Lurrr stumbles back about a foot, maybe two upon breaking. He looks at Kortare and nods. Lurrr motions for Jason to come at him for another lock up. Jason does…Lurrr takes him down with an arm drag! The crowd pops! Lurrr is back on his feet…so is Jason…Jason charges in and is taken down with another arm drag!! The fans grow louder in their cheers. Lurrr is on his feet once more…an increasingly frustrated Kortare charges his way…a third arm drag!! This time Lurrr holds onto Jason’s arm, kneeling on the mat, securing an armbar. He looks out to the crowd, then into the camera and winks. The crowd goes wild with “LURRR!” chants~

Smith: The charismatic legend!

Hood: He’s teaching Kortare a thing or two right now…you can be as strong and quick as you want…but you need to master the mental aspect of this sport

Smith: Indeed

~Kortare forces his way to a standing position. He palms Lurrr by the chin and forces him against the ropes. He shoots Lurrr off the ropes. Lurrr reverses. Kortare hits the ropes. Lurrr throws a knee at Jason…Jason dives over the knee and takes Lurrr down with a roll up. Lurrr rolls over his head, back to his feet. Kortare gets to his feet, quickly and runs Lurrr over with a HUGE lariat!! Lurrr hits the mat, grimacing. The crowd begins to boo~

Smith: And Kortare caught the former OCW Champion!

Hood: He knocked the crap out of Lurrr with that clothesline. Dude’s arm looks like it’s sculpted

Smith: He is in tremendous shape.

~Kortare looks down at Lurrr without a hint of indecision stomps at the Hall of Famer as though he meant nothing. He kicks and stomps, kicks and stomps…each footed strike landing with powerful precision. Lurrr winds up on his ass, sliding back, resting against a bottom buckle. Kortare shoves his foot into Lurrr’s windpipe, cutting off his oxygen. Scruff counts to five. Kortare removes his foot, holding his arms up – abiding by the rules. He then charges in with a knee…Lurrr moves!!! Kortare’s knee slams into the middle buckle!! He limps out of the corner, wincing….Lurrr crawls over and pulls Jason down for a roll up!! Scruff slides in~

1!

2!

Kick Out!!

Smith: The wily veteran…the original legend nearly stole it!

Hood: Kortare’s got to maintain his fucking focus if he wants to knock Lurrr off

Smith: Indeed

~Kortare’s legs toss Lurrr into the ropes. It’s obvious this guy does NOT skip leg day. Lurrr’s body hits the bottom rope…he bounces off and lands on the apron. Kortare rushes to his feet. Lurrr stands. Jason charges at Lurrr with a spear…Lurrr gives him a knee! Kortare is stunned. Lurrr hooks Kortare for a DDT! The fans stand and gasp…this could fuck the rookie up. Kortare throws a few punches into Lurrr’s ribcage, weakening the HOF Champion’s grip. He places his hands on Lurrr’s knees and thrusts upward, tossing Lurrr over the top rope and back into the ring with a back body drop (almost all arms due to Kortare being stuck between the top and middle ropes). Lurrr hits hard. Kortare slides back into the and turns, looking down on the legend~

Smith: This newcomer is so strong

Hood: Yea, he must work out

Smith: I’d say so!

~He grabs Lurrr by his head and pulls him to his feet. Kortare SMACKS Lurrr in the chest with a forearm uppercut. Lurrr is staggered…he drops to one knee. Kortare steps forward with a huge boot to Lurrr’s face! The HOF champion falls to his side, seeing stars. And, no, ELTON JOHN isn’t front row (sorry, Ed). Kortare takes a moment to walk around the ring…the fans boo the shit out of him. He soaks them in as though they provide him with power~

Smith: The arrogance of this man

Hood: Look, I know Lurrr is getting up there…I know Kortare is kicking his ass right now…but the dude needs to stay focused. Lurrr isn’t a hall of famer for no reason

Smith: Indeed

~Lurrr is fighting back to his feet. The fans clap and stomp…they chant “LURRR!” Lurrr is trying to feed off the energy, but he’s weakened…Kortare hits and kicks like a sledgehammer. Lurrr is on all fours…he rises to one knee. Kortare turns, focusing on his opponent. He shakes his head and SLUGS Lurrr across the face. Lurrr falls back onto the mat…the cheers die down. The fans sit in disappointment~

Smith: Vicious right hand across the face

Hood: Let’s hope Lurrr has dental!

Smith: I’m sure he does

~Lurrr rolls onto his stomach and crawls toward Kortare. He almost appears to be begging at Jason’s feet. Kortare looks around and laughs, pointing at the legend. The fans boo and chant “ASSHOLE!” Kortare mouths, “Thank you.” The boos only increase. Lurrr suddenly lunges upward for a low blow but Kortare, showing amazing quickness, grabs his arm!! Lurrr looks up, stunned. Kortare, maintaining wrist control, delivers a knee into Lurrr’s chin. Lurrr is shaken. Kortare yanks Lurrr to his feet, scoops him up and SLAMS him into the mat!!! Lurrr lands on his back, hard~

Smith: Lurrr has no answers for Jason Kortare

Hood: I can’t believe what we’re seeing, Smith. Lurrr has defeated every major name in this profession…except for Mike Best and Matt Meyhu and…okay, maybe not EVERY name…but almost every name

Smith: Were you going somewhere with that?

Hood: Straight to the middle of nowhere, apparently

~Lurrr tries to sit up. Kortare, still on his feet, helps Lurrr out by grabbing the former three time OCW Champion by the back of the neck and spinning him around, once on his feet. He hooks him by the waist, lifts him up and drills Lurrr into the mat with a German Suplex. Kortare decides against bridging into a pin, instead reaching his feet and heading for a corner. He scales it with impressive ease. He stands, at the top, looking down at a prone Lurrr. He leaps off and executes a picture perfect frog splash!! He goes for the pin…the fans are all anticipating the three count~

1!

2!

KICK OUT!!

Smith: He kicked out!

Hood: There’s some gas left in the tank of that old, worn pick up

Smith: Kortare has dominated this match but he’s yet to put Lurrr away…a task easier said than done

~Kortare pops to his knees and glares at Scruff. Scruff backs away, quickly. Kortare gets to his feet and stalks the diminutive referee. Lurrr begins to sit up. The fans start to rally, once again, behind the Hall of Famer. He’s on his knees…now he’s on one knee. Kortare has Scruff intimidated, backed into a corner. Lurrr reaches his feet. He staggers toward Kortare. He reaches, grabbing Kortare by the hair! The fans start to cheer. Kortare turns around and leans forward, barreling his hard head through Lurrr’s grasp, into Lurrr’s forehead!! Lurrr staggers back. Kortare turns his back to Lurrr, jumps up and kicks him in the face with a spinning roundhouse kick!!! Lurrr remains on his feet, shortly before falling face first on the mat~

Smith: It has to be over…Lurrr can’t come back from this

Hood: He’s come back from a lot but Jason Kortare is younger, he’s stronger, he’s quicker…he might be better

~Kortare, back on his feet, grabs Lurrr, pulling him up for what feels like the eleventh time. Lurrr stumbles around, barely able to stand. Kortare knees him in the gut. Lurrr doubles over. Kortare gets Lurrr into position for his Indian Deathlock Piledriver! The fans all rise…they boo…some yell ‘NO!’ others yell “WAKE THE FUCK UP, OLD MAN!” Kortare gets Lurrr’s legs cross…he lifts Lurrr up…Lurrr manages to get his head free!! He sits up, while in the air, rakes Kortare across the eyes, causing Kortare to lose his grip of Lurrr’s legs. Lurrr grabs Kortare by the back of the head and takes him down with a codebreaker!!! The crowd goes wild!! Kortare snaps back, onto the mat!! Lurrr remains on his back, breathing heavily, staring up into the OCW Arena lights~

Smith: Great reversal by Lurrr! He obviously had Kortare scouted and knew it would be lights out if he didn’t do something

Hood: Yep, that’s how Kortare finishes people off. Lurrr was not ready to be finished off. Yikes, should have phrased that better

Smith: I thought you phrased it fine

Hood: Yea, you would

~Kortare sits up first. He shakes his head, trying to figure out what the hell just happened. He gets to his feet and stumbles into the ropes. The fans are clamoring for the legend…they chant “LURRR! LURRR! LURRR!” The OCW hall of famer remains on the mat. Kortare begins to refocus. He motions toward Lurrr who suddenly KIPS UP! The place goes wild!!! Lurrr is on his feet, fired up! Kortare throws a punch…it gets blocked!! Lurrr responds with a punch! And another! And another! And another!! Kortare is reeling!! Lurrr whips him off the ropes…Kortare sprints across the ring, he bounces off the ropes and eats a flying forearm from Lurrr!! Kortare falls to the mat as Lurrr pops back to his feet!! The fans are jumping up and down, screaming the legend’s name!! Lurrr heads into a corner and lifts up his leg, stomping it down, onto the mat as the fans stomp their feet in unison, creating a very loud, resounding thud!~

Smith: Lurrr is on fire!! Kortare is in trouble!

Hood: He’s gearing up for The Wake Up Call!! This is the move that won him the OCW Championship not once…not twice…but three times!

Smith: If he hits it, Kortare’s run in this tournament will be over!

~Kortare begins to rise. He has no idea what’s waiting for him. Kortare is almost to his feet…he stands…then falls back to one knee. Lurrr’s legs are shaking…he’s fire up, he’s ready to go. Jason finally stands…Lurrr lunges forward and…HE FALLS DOWN! The fans go quiet. Kortare drops back to a knee. Lurrr looks over, on the mat and sees – PERZAG!~

Smith: PerZag grabbed his leg!

Hood: Well, I guess we know what’s going to happen to LurrrZag

Smith: It appears as though that team is no more!

~Zag slides into the ring with Lurrr’s HOF Title! Zag pops up to his feet. Scruff warns Zag to get out of the ring. Lurrr gets up and eats a huge belt shot to the face!!! Lurrr drops to the mat, knocked out! Scruff shakes his head and signals toward the time keeper. The bell rings! The fans are booing and chanting “BULLSHIT~

Smith: What’s going on? Did Scruff call this a DQ?

Hood: Oh man, Kortare just got fucked

Belvedere: Here is your winner as a result of a disqualification….LURRR!!!!!

~Zag turns around, knowing Kortare is going to be livid. Kortare is on his feet. He looks to the crowd. He looks to Scruff. He’s still a bit dazed. He’s trying to figure out what happened. He turns toward Zag and he gets BLASTED in the face by the belt!!! Kortare drops to the mat, knocked out. PerZag holds up the HOF Title. The fans continue to boo. He tosses the title at Lurrr and places his foot into Lurrr’s throat~

Smith: PerZag has ruined this match! He’s cost Jason Kortare a shot at the OCW Title!

Hood: He wants Lurrr, Smith. He’s going to be a constant threat hanging over Lurrr as he advances in the tournament.

Smith: Possibly…I don’t know what he thinks he’s doing with that Hall of Fame Championship. You can only contend for that IF you are in the Hall of Fame

~The fans suddenly react. Rick Mathis comes rushing to the ring with a chair in hand. Zag sees the big, armed man and bolts in the opposite direction. Mathis slides into the ring. Zag hops over the top rope, dropping to the floor with a perfect landing. Mathis rushes over and throws the chair through the ropes at Zag. PerZag dodges the chair and hustles around the ring, eventually making his way to the bottom of the ramp~

Smith: Rick Mathis finally out here to save his employer!

Hood: I know this was a dick move by Zag…but he kinda has some beef, ya know?

Smith: There are other ways of handling these types of things, Hood. He just ruined a first round match up in the biggest tournament OCW has ever held!

~The fans continue to boo Zag. He points at Mathis saying, “You forced this! You ruined LurrrZag!” Mathis flips Zag off before tending to Lurrr. Kortare is still laid out, looking up at the lights~

Smith: Poor Kortare…I’m not a fan of the kid’s attitude…but he really got done dirty tonight

Hood: This could have been a career defining victory. Instead, he had his position in this tournament eliminated without ever being defeated. Sucks.

Smith: Indeed

~Jason’s match was over, he slides out of the ring and begins to make his way up the ramp way. He does not look happy…he says something along the lines of, “Welsh is going to hear about this.” The video screens and the titantron screen inside the arena begins to turn pitch black. Jason stops dead in his tracks as he looks up at the titantron screen and suddenly a video clip begins to play. A video of a young, beautiful, dark haired woman begins to appear on the screen. The woman had a black hood over her head, she looked seductive and mysterious as she stares into the camera. Jason looks at the video and was surprised to see who the woman was. The woman was staring directly at Jason with a bit of an evil glare.~

{Cassie}: “Hello Jason, remember me? The EX friend that you once had in your life? The woman who stood by your side when everybody else turned their backs on you? The woman who was like a sister to you, the woman who’s life you once ruined. Yeah, that’s right, it’s me, Cassie. Hi honey, how have you been? I guess this is a surprise for you to see me on this video. Did you really think that I was going to let you just start a new life in OCW and continue on with your wrestling career? You had to nerve to bring that piece of TRASH Aubrey Baxter back into your life? You abandoned me, you betrayed me, you broke me down.”

~The video begins to show Cassie walking along a sidewalk in a neighborhood development.~

{Cassie}: “I will be arriving in OCW real soon. It’s time for me to get the payback and sweet revenge that I deserve. You owe me, you owe me everything. Whatever greatness you get out of OCW? I am going to get my percentage of it. I am going to enjoy making your life a living hell. As of right now? It seems like your beautiful Florida home is beginning to look like hell.”

~The camera now quickly moves over to show that Jason Kortare’s house was set completely on fire as it was burning down to the ground!!!~

~The video shuts off as we now see an angry and hysterical Jason Kortare on his knees while remaining on the ramp way. He starts pounding his fist into the ground!~

[Jason]: “YOU B*TCH! YOU B*TCH! I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!”

Smith: She’s destroyed his home!

Hood: Bitch is fuckin crazy

Smith: I’m not sure what he did to her but, apparently, she felt it necessitated conflagration

Hood: I don’t know what that word means but it sounds like you’re taking her side. Why can’t we get a #HimToo going? Huh?

Smith: Because men don’t need protecting

Hood: Haha, that’s probably the most sexist thing ANYBODY has said tonight

Smith: Err…uhh, let’s cut to something else!

~We head backstage to a remarkably unremarkable conference room inside the OCW Arena. The walls are white. The tables are white. The plants… those are green. Who keeps white plants? The ceiling, though, that is surely white. So, too, is the Sky.~

Young Man: It’s like I’m really in Australia! I just saw a wallaby jump by me! Come here, buddy!

Young Woman: I’m flying! I feel so free up here. I never want to come down!

~The two millennials, each clad in white as one might expect in such a room, crack their voices in excitement, the man hopping along after an imaginary wallaby, the woman’s arms outstretched like an airplane. Each of them wears a silver and black VR headset. The camera pans to find more such white-clad young people with similar headsets, some flailing their limbs, some with mouths wide open in awe, all appearing super content with wherever they find themselves.~

Robin Toth: Intriguing, isn’t it, friends?

~The camera, now very obviously just a cellphone selfie cam, fumbles and maneuvers around, the profiles of two figures suddenly jolting into view, bookending the virtual insanity going on behind them. Robin Toth, his face fully visible as it was at Social Justice, has his eyes closed and an unassuming grin on his lips. Across from him, YUKI-ONNA’s face is simply her elegant-but-eerie white yokai mask, her eyes darkened within its shade.~

Robin Toth: A wise man once told us how virtual reality will be the death of reality itself. Because if we could all live in a world where we can visit anyplace on earth, perform supernatural feats, see our departed loved ones every day, and be anyone we choose to be with a simple click of a button…

~He opens his wide eyes, the grin staying put.~

Robin Toth: Why wouldn’t we want that all… the… time??? Yuki-san, our brethren in the Sky would no longer have to fight! We could live in a world without greedy, chauvinistic, racist politicians standing in the way of progress! We could stand on the highest mountain and see nothing but the clearest skies, free of pollution and filth! We could be in a happier place. A place where our friends could live among each other, sharing in our good works, not just tolerating one another, but practicing acceptance and love for our fellow man!

~YUKI-ONNA’s eyes dart upward, becoming visible in the light. Toth shudders as if a lightning bolt of inspiration just hit him in the head, the camera shuddering with him.~

Robin Toth: You’re right! Man OR woman! Or whoever they identify as or were born to become! That’s the world we would live in, friends!!! But… that is not the world we find ourselves in when we step back into reality, is it? This reality is where we find ourselves, and where we find ourselves is a dire, terrible place where people seek to silence the meek and praise the wicked. People like our dear, charming captain of this ark, Brother Marcus Welsh. Perhaps, Yuki-san, Brother Welsh saw the Sky fall upon his favorite playthings at Social Justice and is simply gaslighting! The hate-filled Chad Vargas, the self-destructing Bobby Grenier, the narcissistic PerZag, and, of course, the washed-up zombie stealing valuable camera time to tell of his latest drunken brouhaha (the time we could be using to spread our message and benefit billions of people no less!), the mighty legend known as Lurrr. Those four men were very bad indeed at Social Justice, friends. They needed to learn, and teach them, we most certainly did. And where did it get us? Yet another week where Brother Welsh conveniently doesn’t book us and Sister Yuki on his Massacre program. How deliciously subtle, Brother Welsh! It’s almost as if he doesn’t want to hear what we have to say, hmmmmm?

~Toth reaches down with his free hand and produces his sparkling blue masquerade mask from the abyss. He places it delicately over his eyes, wrapping the thin strap around the back of his head without so much as jostling the selfie cam. He turns fully toward the camera now, his eyes gleaming from behind the mask and his Cheshire grin on full display. The camera now begins to shake slightly as his voice gains energy and intensity.~

Robin Toth: That, friends, is why we fight. It is why we speak out against injustice and never stop banging down the doors of those who oppose us, demanding the snows of change to bluster and roar! We are young, Brother Welsh, but we are also unafraid! You try to keep us off your dear Massacre, and yet, we persist! The question that remains, Brother Welsh, is… how long will it take for you to realize what we and millennials everywhere already know?! That the sky is turning a brighter tone of white with every snowflake that you ignore. And this sacred land of OCW you hold so dear will continue to be wrought with a virtual blizzard of proud snowflakes until we are all you see in this reality and any other. We will be all. You. See.

~Toth turns the camera back toward the young men and women in the background, whose VR headsets have suddenly been replaced by the shimmering blue snowflake masks.~

Robin Toth: Because together…

White Sky: WE ARE THE SKY!!!!!!

~Toth grins ecstatically, panning the selfie cam over to YUKI-ONNA, whose eyes creepily stare into the camera. She suddenly flourishes the long sleeve of her robe in front of her mask, blocking out the camera in a tornado of white cloth until it goes completely black.~

Smith: The movement continues! White Sky isn’t knocking on the door, they are looking to break it down.

Hood: That’s how revolutions go, Smith. Successful revolutions, anyway. Not that revolution by that blue guy in Thor Ragnarok.

Smith: Yes, a good reminder that when organizing a revolution you should always print enough pamphlets.

Hood: Revolution 101, Smith.

Smith: White Sky is another in a long line of impressive, talented tag teams. Grenier and Vargas look to be victims of their own success.

Hood: They’ve revived the tag team division and what do they get in return? A bunch of crazy talented, borderline psycho teams to contend against. CLASSIC OCW, BABY.

Smith: Indeed…well folks, it’s that time…it’s MAIN EVENT time. Our final first round match within the Scorpion Bracket is set to take place with the former Paradigm Champion, Ed Houston taking on wrestling legend…one of the biggest names in this industry…making her first legitimate on screen debut in OCW…Amy Jo Smyth!

Hood: I’ve heard a lot about AJS…looking forward to seeing her in action!

Scorpion Bracket – 1st Round
(3) Ed Houston (19-10) vs. (6) Amy Jo Smyth (0-0)

~The OCW fans are feeling it! It’s late in the evening, one match remains…the beer has been flowing. A man vaping in the crowd is busy talking about how some other promotion somewhere else set a pro wrestling trend by having a tournament two weeks ago. He’s immediately beaten down by a rabid group of diehard OCW fans who are chewing their cigarettes dry, then swallowing…LIKE REAL MEN. Belvedere clears his throat~

Belvedere: Ladies and Gentlemen it is now time for our main event of the evening!! This match is scheduled for one fall and is the final first round match within the Scorpion Bracket!! Introducing first…

~An “AJS!” chant breaks out. These fans are well aware of who is about to make their Massacre debut. It’s the world renowned pro wrestling star, Amy Jo Smyth! The lights lower and the remaining lights turn to a golden color. “Shoot to Thrill” by Halestorm hits. The crowd explodes into cheers. Amy Jo Smyth steps out onto the stage, her back turned to the crowd, head covered by the hood of her jacket. The golden lights change and simulate a cascade of glitter over her. Smyth spins around on her toes and faces the crowd as a single spotlight falls on her~

I got my gun at the ready gonna fire at will ‘Cause I shoot to thrill and I’m ready to kill I can’t get enough and I can’t get my fill Shoot to thrill play to kill Pull the trigger, pull it Pull it, pull it Pull the trigger
~She then throws her head back, the hood falling off her head, and arms upward and outward, letting the remaining glittering light wash over her. She slowly makes her way down the ramp, looking over the crowd, giving the occasional high five to a fan with a perfectly placed hand. She reaches the end of the ramp and throws a fist up in the air. The crowd pops.~

Belvedere: ……Hailing from the great state of New Jersey… She has her Ph.D. in submissions… “The Good Doctor” Amy Jo Smyth!

~After a quick moment of listening to the crowd, she rushes forward, slides into the ring, and stands. Smyth unzips her hoodie and spins on her toes with her arms raised. She throws both arms down triggering an explosion of glittering light over the ring. ~

~She quickly strips of her hoodie and passes it off to the nearest person on the outside. The lights come back up but remain golden.~

Smith: And there she is! A living legend within this industry!

Hood: Another woman? For fuck’s sake, man!

Smith: I’d watch it, Hood. She’s liable to come over here and give you the beating of your life.

Hood: Blah blah blah

Belvedere: And, her opponent…

~The screen turns black and then slowly starts to count down from 10. Once it hits 1 the sound of a rocket taking off echoes throughout the arena. Rocket Man starts to blare as Ed Houston slowly makes his way down the entrance ramp. He stops by fans in the crowd and high fives them. Ed’s sporting a bandage on his forehead and a heavy tape job around his nose. He’s also limping on his bad knee. He reaches the bottom of the ramp, walks up the steps, doing his best to not favor his wounded leg and motions for the crowd. They go wild! Houston smiles and steps through the ropes, entering the ring~

Belvedere: From Miami, Florida…standing 5’9 and weighing in at 175lbs…he is a former OCW Craze Champion, he is a former OCW Paradigm Champion, and he was the final man to hold the OCW LightWeight Championship…he is…The Rocket Man…Ed Houston!!!

~Strong pop for Ed! Ed, again, smiles, appreciative of all the love~

Smith: Ed waged war with Kitty Petrova last Monday and, well, it shows

Hood: Yea, Kitty is the new Paradigm Champion

Smith: Indeed, but not without a fight…Ed gave her everything she could handle and then some. Yet, in the end, with the aid of some brass knuckles, Kitty was able to ground The Rocket Man.

~The bell rings. Belvedere exits the ring~

Smith: Vicious booking, having Ed come out one week later against Amy Jo Smyth

Hood: Okay, so what’s this woman’s deal? She seems like a big deal.

Smith: She’s a HUGE deal, Hood. She wins championships everywhere she goes…she’s an icon, a hero, one of the best this business has ever seen.

Hood: So Ed’s fucked?

Smith: He’s got his hands full, to be sure.

~AJS moves toward Ed. Houston seems slightly apprehensive. It’s as though he’s in there with a star…someone that gives him pause, almost stage fright. AJS is eager to engage…so she closes in on Ed who still seems struck. AJS lunges forward and locks up with Ed. Houston shoves back, finally showing some signs of competitive life. AJS instantly transitions behind Ed, taking hold of his arm and pulling it back and up against the bottom portion of his shoulder blade. Ed winces. The more pain he feels…the more he’s forced to interact, the less he’s impacted by Smyth’s star power. AJS backs up, into a corner. She stands onto the middle rope and jumps off, pushing Ed to the ground. She comes down with both knees landing onto Ed’s arm, still pinned behind his back!! Houston instantly reaches for his left arm and shoulder, bringing it in for protection. AJS is back on her feet, looking confident~

Smith: I’ve never seen that move before

Hood: That makes two of us…then again, I see moves every week I’ve never seen before.

Smith: So nice that you admit that on air.

Hood: 100% transparency, Smith. That’s the way I live my life. The only items which could be considered somewhat opaque in my life are my shower curtains and bedroom drapes.

Smith: Can we get back to the match?

Hood: You mean Ed’s decimation? Sure

~Houston manages to sit up. He’s clutching his left shoulder. AJS runs forward and throws a penalty kick at his shoulder…but Ed catches her leg! The crowd pops because, well, they love the former Paradigm Champion. Houston fights to his feet. AJS looks at him like, “What are you gonna do?” Ed goes for a dragon screw leg whip…AJS, though, grabs his silly man bun and yanks down! Houston is jerked to the mat, slamming hard!! The crowd is torn…they are excited, given it’s Smyth’s OCW debut…but they are also huge Houston fans. AJS stands over Ed, looking very strong thus far~

Smith: Ed’s fighting with a bad knee…a busted head and nose…and now his left arm and shoulder appear to be wounded

Hood: He’s falling apart, Smith! The guy is held together by duct tape, bubble gum, and elmer’s glue

Smith: Why Elmer’s?

Hood: Because we went over budget on the gum

~Smyth goes for Ed’s knee. She grabs it. Ed sits up and throws his hands up as if to plead, “NO!” AJS won’t relent. She spins around giving the appearance she’s aiming for a Figure Four. Ed takes his good leg and kicks her in the ass. She stumbles forward, losing control of his leg. Ed rolls over and crawls toward the ropes, making it to the apron. AJS turns around and sees Ed seated on the apron. He gingerly hops off the apron, to the floor, limping on his bad leg. Smyth takes off and dives through the ropes…Houston looks over his shoulder, he sees AJS coming…he uses his right arm, grabs her and drops her with a stunner on the outside!!! AJS flips over, onto her back…she might be out! The fans at ringside leap out of their seats! Houston is seated up against the barricade, wincing as he touches…well, pretty much every part of his body~

Smith: How in the blue moon did Ed pull that off?

Hood: Blue moon…the fuck made you say that?

Smith: I’m trying new idioms out.

Hood: You sound like an idiot.

Smith: Okay, I can cross that one off the list. I’ll try another new one here in a minute!

Hood: Please, don’t.

~Houston fights back to his feet. The fans are encouraging him. One person yells, “LET YOUR ROCKET FLY!” A few people look at him like “Dude, slow down on the booze.” Ed pays the fan no attention. He remains focused on AJS. He pauses, looking down at the legend. Again, he seems star struck…as though this is his first flight into space, getting a look at the vast depth that surrounds. He snaps out of it and grabs AJS by the hair and tosses her into the ring. He climbs, gingerly onto the apron and looks to the corner. The fans cheer…a few fans (members of the Ed Houston fan club…also women who appear to have sizable crushes on The Rocket Man) seem nervous for Ed. They advise against his high flying tendencies. But, Ed climbs anyway. It takes him awhile…but, he reaches the top. He’s standing on one leg…this doesn’t look like a good idea. He leaps off, looking for the same Senton he dropped on Kitty last week. Smyth moves!! Ed lands flat on his back, hard!! Smith snares Ed’s leg! The pain screaming in Ed’s back becomes secondary when he realizes his injured leg is in the hands of an expert submissions artist! He tries to pull it free, but can’t! AJS locks in a hook on Ed’s leg, twisting his knee!! Houston yells out in pain~

Smith: She’s got Ed’s leg locked in! I don’t think he’ll be able to withstand the pain!

Hood: This fucking guy…that fucking knee…when was the last time Ed was healthy?

Smith: Heading into The Greatest Show on Earth?

Hood: Dude…that was like a year ago!

~The fans clamor for Ed to fight back. He raises his fists in the air, struggling, trying to feed off their energy. AJS continues to twist, applying as much pressure as her muscles will allow. Ed sits up. Houston throws a few punches at AJS…he manages to make impact with her ribcage, an area that can be vulnerable. The strikes weaken Smyth’s lock. Ed struggles, fighting to his feet. He’s able to force AJS to hers. Ed’s standing on one leg…AJS retains control of his bad knee. Ed throws and enziguri at AJS…she catches his leg!! She has both Houston’s legs! He falls to the mat, on his back…she falls backward and shoots Ed into the air with a catapult! Ed SLAMS into the top buckle. He leans on it, for support, his body appearing to be devoid of any sort of physical strength. AJS crawls over and rolls Ed up for a pin~

1!

2!

KICK OUT!

Smith: Ed kicked out…with his good leg!

Hood: Thanks for stating the obvious

Smith: Hey, you realize some people can’t actually see what’s going on. They rely on our words to develop a mental image

Hood: Bullshit

~AJS is on all fours, looking to return to her feet. She can’t. Ed’s got her leg! He gets to one knee (his good knee) and applies Countdown (Ankle Lock)!!! AJS winces, grimacing with pain. She reaches for the ropes but they are beyond the tips of her fingers. She runs her hands through her blonde hair, fighting through the twisting and torturing of her ankle. Ed’s turning the ankle in an awkward position as hard as he can, hoping to get a tap out~

Smith: Countdown! We don’t see this very often from Ed

Hood: His knee is fucked up. What do you expect him to do, jump off the top rope like an idiot?

Smith: Hey, calm down. Just because you aren’t feeling well doesn’t mean you get to take it out on me.

Hood: Then what good are you.

~AJS is showing tremendous fight! She pushes up with her hands and tucks forward, rolling! Ed is sent diving into the ropes, heading first. He lifts his arms up, bouncing off the ropes with his shoulder blades. He lands on his feet and tries a pele kick to a now standing AJS…but, his knee gives out!! He winds up landing on his back. AJS dives in, looking for a triangle choke! Ed, familiar with this move, does everything he can to fight it off~

Smith: AJS is going for…Eat Me Out!

Hood: Excuse me?

Smith: You heard me

Hood: Hot damn!

~Ed manages to keep away from being fully locked into Smyth’s patented finisher…he swivels his hips and gets his good leg on the bottom rope. Scruff, doing his job for once, steps in and orders a break. AJS complies. Houston rolls over the bottom rope, onto the apron. He uses the ropes to get to his feet. AJS is back on her feet…she throws a well-placed jab through the ropes, into Houston’s abdomen. She reaches over the top rope, looking for a suplex~

Smith: Death by Glitter!

Hood: Rumor has it Meyhu hates this move

Smith: He’s no fan of glitter, I know that much.

Hood: What would he do with LIME glitter, do you suppose?

Smith: I don’t know…but how about we focus on this match? Amy Jo Smyth is looking to put an end to Ed Houston!

~AJS lifts Ed up for a vertical suplex back into the ring. Houston, through, manages to slip free!! He slides down Smyth’s back, pulls her over and places all his weight on her legs with a modified sunset flip!! Scruff slides in with the count~

1!

2!

3!!!

~The bell rings! Ed looks up, shocked!~

Belvedere: Here is your winner…ED HOUSTON!!!!!

Smith: The kid did it! He beat the legend!

Hood: Wow! I didn’t see this coming

Smith: I don’t think anyone did…what a tremendous upset for Ed Houston!

~Ed rolls out of the ring, hobbling up the ramp. He continues to display a look of shock. For years he was told he couldn’t compete with someone of Smyth’s caliber. Tonight, he proved those people wrong. AJS remains in the ring, looking at Scruff. She’s equally stunned~

Smith: I don’t think Amy was expecting to lose here, tonight

Hood: Man I had her making the final 8, easy

Smith: A stunning first round upset! But, it just goes to show the depth and talent of the OCW roster

~Ed is at the top of the ramp. He’s keeping as much pressure off his bad knee as possible. The lights suddenly go out! Fans scream~

Smith: Oh no! Not this again!

Hood: Is this Morty the Mortician?

Smith: WHO?!

I have awoken. Feel my Wrath.
~The lights switch back on! Houston is laid out, atop the ramp, covered in Jagermeister!!! The crowd is stunned~

Smith: What is this all about? Who is this person attacking people with Jager?

Hood: I don’t know…but he’s targeted Bob and now Ed. Hmm, you think the next victim might have a one letter name?

Smith: No

Hood: Okay, but if some guy named ‘T’ joins in the next week, I’m going to predict he’s this jager guy’s next victim

Smith: You do that…Ed Houston advances! We’re one fourth of our way through the first round of this tournament…we’ve seen upsets…we’ve seen near upsets…we’ve seen exciting action and so much more is left to take place in the coming weeks.

Hood: We signing off?

Smith: Yea, I think so. I’m tired.

Hood: Me too.

Smith: Wait…before we sign off, let’s take a look at the updated Block Party Scorpion Bracket!

Smith: Some huge names eliminated in the first round

Hood: No shit, man…Rhodes and AJS especially…those are main event level players.

Smith: Indeed…this tournament is going to be wild. Well, that’s it for us…see you guys all next week!

~Fade to Black~

Show Details

The OCW Arena

Key West, Florida

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